by Raeann Blake
“Hey. You’re right on time. Isobell just put supper on the table.”
“Okay. I’ll just, uh…go put my gloves and hat in my room. I’ll be right there,” she said quietly without looking back at him.
Clay swallowed hard and shifted his eyes to Laine and let out just the slightest breath when his hand landed on his shoulder as he gave him a confident nod.
“It’ll be okay, buddy. Just take it one minute at a time,” Laine whispered after Hailey was in her room.
Clay nodded mutely and turned to start back to the kitchen when Laine pulled him back. “Let’s wait for her. Walk in with her.”
“Why? Never mind. Okay,” he agreed when he decided anything Laine suggested couldn’t be worse than he’d done on his own.
Laine raised his voice back to a normal tone and looked at Clay instead of watching Hailey’s door. “I’m gonna go over the list of things we need for Charlie’s office with her tonight. We’ll get some of the guys to start working on getting it ready for him tomorrow. By the time I’ve finished showing him all of the things he’ll need to do on the computer and going over what all I want him to handle, all of that stuff will be here. It’ll take me a few days to walk him through everything and he can use my computer until we’ve got it all set up.”
“Sounds good. She can order everything tomorrow. Did you talk to her about payroll?” Clay asked.
“Not yet. I’ll…there she is. Sugar, I want to talk to you about taking over payroll. Are you up for that?”
“Sure. There’s no reason you should have to handle processing all of that,” Hailey said as she walked back to them, keeping her eyes on Laine.
“Good. We’ll talk about it later. Let’s eat. Something smells really good.”
She still didn’t look at him, but she did manage to speak to him. “Clay, I have next week’s bills ready for you to go over. Maybe we could do that in the morning before the boys get here.”
“Sure. Anytime you’re ready,” Clay said as easily as he could. He desperately wanted her to look at him. He just didn’t know how to make that happen. And he was just a little afraid for her to. He worried that Laine might have been right. If he did more damage than what could be fixed, he was afraid he’d be able to see it in her eyes.
“Okay. We’ll do it in the morning. Isobell, that smells wonderful.”
“I’ll say it does. And I’m starving,” Laine said brightly.
“Well, sit down and help yourselves. Hailey, tea for you tonight?”
Hailey nodded as she climbed onto one of the stools. “I understand you have a feast planned for tomorrow night.”
“I absolutely do. Fried chicken, white gravy, mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, baked beans, biscuits, salad, and apple cobbler. Two of them because Laine’s coming,” Isobell said then patted Laine on the shoulder when they all three laughed.
“I heard that about him. That he really likes apple cobbler,” Hailey said with a wide smile.
“Honey, he likes anything that’s sweet. The boy has a sweet tooth you wouldn’t believe and a hollow leg a mile long.”
“Hey. I’m sittin’ right here,” Laine grumbled then laughed and kissed Isobell on the cheek. “That’s for the apple cobbler.”
Hailey spooned food on her plate as she cut her eyes to Clay then right back down. She took one bite then sighed. “Oh, man. And this is my absolute favorite. You just can’t beat a good roast.”
“And I heard that about you. That you really like meat,” Laine said quietly then waited for it to sink in. When he saw the grin try to tug at the corners of her mouth he knew that she realized he was teasing her about the things that she had said to Gail and laughed out loud when she hitched her chin up a notch but managed to hide the smile.
“Yes, I do,” she said simply.
“Uh-huh. Clay did Kathy say what time they’d get here tomorrow?”
Clay shook his head slightly then glanced at Hailey. No matter what he saw, he really wanted her to look at him now. “No. She didn’t. Hailey, did you enjoy your ride?”
“I did. Mystery Creek is dry today,” she said with no emotion in her voice at all.
“Yeah, it does that. It’ll be back just like it was…if you give it time,” he said as he watched her face. He saw her open her mouth then close it again. Her bottom teeth slipped up over her top lip and then disappeared and still she waited several seconds before she spoke.
“I’m not sure that I can believe things are ever exactly like they were once something happens to change it.”
When he didn’t reply she finally lifted her eyes to his and met them squarely. Clay felt his heart drop when he found the emotionless gaze directed at him. He wanted to say he was sorry. He wanted to say he didn’t believe that she was working with Yates. He wanted to ask her not to leave. But he couldn’t do any of those things. Any of those, all of those would give her exactly what she wanted—a weapon to use to gain whatever it was she was after.
“Maybe I could sit in when you’re showing Laine those reports. I should probably learn about those, too.”
“Yes, you should. You should know how to take full advantage of the software.”
He hesitated to say anything else and looked down at his plate before he did. “True, but I won’t really need to use it, right?”
He chanced one look back up at her then dropped his head when he found she wasn’t looking at him anymore and didn’t answer him.
“Of course you won’t, buddy. But it would still be a good thing for you to know. Right, Hailey?” Laine asked.
Hailey hesitated for several seconds then nodded. “Yes. Yes, it would.”
“Hey, I know your dad is gone. Do you have any other family?” Laine asked. He was trying anything he could think of to keep the conversation light.
Hailey nodded slightly without looking up. “Yeah. I’ve got an older brother, Dwayne. He’s a couple of years older than me.”
“Really? He’s still in New Mexico? “
“Yeah. I tried to get him to come up here with me but he wouldn’t even talk about it. He’s not too fond of cattle ranches. He couldn’t wait to get off of ours. And he was thrilled when he found out we were going to sell the ranch until he found out he wasn’t going to get a lot of money out of it.”
“It’s not for everybody. I’ve known plenty of kids who grew up on a ranch and hated it. Kathy for one,” Clay said quietly.
“Well he’s certainly one of them. He’d just as soon never see another horse or head of cattle as long as he lives. He won’t even eat beef he hated it so much. I can’t really blame him. Daddy didn’t know how to go about raising a girl so he just pretty much did whatever he thought was the right thing. It usually wasn’t but he did try. But with Dwayne, he was really tough on him. He expected Dwayne to follow in his footsteps. He had no such aspirations for me. So he got the brunt of it when he made it clear that he had no interest in doing all of the things that Daddy forced him to do. With me it was just the opposite. I had to force my way into the things that he wanted Dwayne to do. And he never accepted that I could have been the one to follow in his footsteps,” Hailey said quietly.
Both men had stopped eating to listen to her and when she realized they were both watching her intently she shrugged her shoulders and said, “It’s not a big deal. Certainly nothing like what you and Kathy went through.”
“I’m not sure that’s true. He didn’t think I was good enough to do anything. It sounds like your dad treated you the same way whether he really believed it or not.”
“Maybe. But I know he loved me. I guess that made it bearable. Can we please change the subject?” she asked softly. She didn’t want to talk about her dad or Clay’s. She had enough things in her head already without going back over what were not the best memories for either of them.
When Clay didn’t say anything else, Laine jumped back in. “Sure we can. So where are we camping out?”
Clay chuckled softly and said, “Out behind the house if it does
n’t rain. I heard a little thunder earlier. I think it might rain tonight and I’m hoping that tomorrow will be okay. If it rains then I guess we’ll do it on the back porch.”
He paused just a few seconds then said, “Do you know what she said?”
“What?”
“She said the boys waver back and forth. One week they want to be firemen, and the next week they want to be cowboys…like Uncle Clay,” he said with a voice filled with emotion.
“Oh, how sweet,” Hailey said without meaning to.
“That’s about the best compliment you can get, buddy. I hope this trip out will be the first of many,” Laine added.
“So do I. I know they’ll never come out here to stay, move here I mean. But I sure wouldn’t mind her letting the kids come and stay when they can. She said she didn’t mind us taking them riding. And just because she doesn’t like riding doesn’t mean the boys can’t. So maybe someday she’ll let them come out and stay here with us some.”
“That would be nice. I’d like that, too. I enjoy those boys being here as much as you do.”
“I have a question. The day I came here for my interview you told me that you could tolerate your nephews on occasion. Why did you say that when you so obviously adore them?” Hailey asked.
Clay blew out a long breath and finally lifted his eyes to her and found her watching him and he could see a true question in her eyes.
“I don’t really know the answer to that. I guess because most of the time when I see them, it’s in town. And I can only take that for so long. So what I said wasn’t really true. At least what I said about them. But what I said about other people’s kids was. And I won’t tolerate another man living in my house—except for Laine, Shack, or Gage if I was to get lucky enough for them to move out here. But that’s not going to happen.”
“Are you and Shack moving in the house, Laine?” Isobell asked.
“I haven’t made that decision yet. But I am thinking about it. Shack and I haven’t really had a chance to talk it over either.”
“I think that’s a wonderful idea. I know you’d love that, wouldn’t you Clay?” she asked.
“I would absolutely love that. Isobell, why don’t you sit down? We’ll wash and dry if you’ll sit for a while.”
Isobell looked back at him in surprise then smiled slightly. “You don’t have to do that. But I will sit for a few minutes,” she said then poured a cup of coffee and joined them at the bar, sliding onto a stool beside Laine.
“Hailey, have you thought about when you’d like to go down town with me?”
“Actually, I haven’t. But I’d like to go the next time we both have the same day off. I’d really like to see all of the things you were talking about.”
“I’m off Saturday and Sunday. Saturday is a great day to go. It’s bustling and everything is open. I’ll even treat you at the coffee place,” Isobell said then smiled widely when Hailey’s mouth twitched and Laine and Clay both laughed.
Chapter Nineteen
Clay stood on the back porch with a cigarette in one hand and a drink in the other. He stared into the night sky, watching the soft gentle rain that was falling as he remembered the time they had spent in Hailey’s office. She had been very thorough in explaining the reports and very business-like. The few times that he “accidentally” brushed her arm as he pointed at something on the screen while he asked a question had resulted in her easily moving her arm away without pointing it out or saying anything about it. When she did look at him, there was nothing there of the way she had looked at him before. How did he get to the point in less than two weeks that he had come to bask in that look? No woman had ever gotten close to him before. None had ever stirred things up inside of him so much that everything seemed to be out of focus. But Hailey had—in just a matter of hours. He had finally admitted that he had known deep down right from the minute she walked in the door that she made him feel something he’d never felt before. Maybe he should have listened to that voice of impending doom that had been echoing at the back of his mind. It had been screaming at him from the first day that he was making a mistake by hiring her. And he had made so many more since then.
Now he missed her. And he didn’t know what to do about that. She had made it perfectly clear that the way things had been before was gone. It was probably for the best. God knows it was a path they should have never gone down. But he missed her.
He crushed the cigarette out on his boot and tossed it away then sank down on the top step. He set the glass down then leaned forward and dropped his head into his hands. He had to tell her he was sorry. He could leave it at that. Just that he was sorry.
The first clue he had that she was behind him was when her hand touched his back. The breath rushed quickly out of his lungs and he straightened slowly as her arm went over his shoulder and down his chest. When her lips touched his neck he moaned softly and leaned his head against hers.
“Oh, God. Hailey, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean what I said,” he whispered hoarsely.
“Shhh. Don’t talk,” she murmured against his skin.
When the first snap on his shirt came free and her hand slipped inside he turned his head and captured her lips with his then pulled her around him enough to turn her and settle her on his lap as he deepened the kiss. One hand was behind her back at her waist and the other behind her neck, pulling her deeper into the kiss.
He broke the kiss and cupped her face in his hand. “Would you come upstairs with me?” he asked hoarsely. When she nodded slightly he blew out a quick breath then leaned his forehead against hers as he let his thumb stroke softly against her cheek. He finally felt that band around his chest loosen and the air that he had been struggling to get in and out of his lungs began to move easily as he helped her stand then rose beside her. He kept her hand in his as he picked up the glass and let her lead him inside.
She took the glass from him as they went in the door without letting go of his hand. He closed the door behind them and she set the glass on the bar on their way by. He followed her silently up the stairs, into the bedroom, and to the side of the bed before she turned back to him.
“Clay, are you sure this is okay?” she asked softly.
“Yes,” he whispered without hesitating. They each silently undressed and slid under the covers. Clay reached for her and pulled her close to him, wrapping his arms completely around her as he dropped his cheek to lie against the top of her head.
They stayed that way for several long minutes before he lifted her chin so he could see her eyes. He thought there might be tears there, but he wasn’t sure. He let his lips brush softly against hers then waited for her to make the next move. He just needed to know that she wanted him, further proof than coming to find him outside. When she let her hand trail up his chest and slip behind his neck to pull him back for more, it broke the dam inside of him. He pulled her tightly against him and he kissed her freely, letting the passion sweep them both away.
When Clay drifted to sleep with his arms locked around her, she finally let the first teardrop fall. She had tried so hard not to do this. Without a doubt, she was opening herself up for more pain than she had ever known. And still she hadn’t been able to stop it. She had gone to her room as soon as Laine left, determined not to be alone with him tonight. It could only lead to one of two things—another fight or this. She didn’t want either one to happen. But when she got to her room she couldn’t lie down. She had sat on the side of the bed, but couldn’t make herself lie down. The pull to be close to him, to feel him want her there was so strong that she couldn’t ignore it.
When she left the room, she didn’t know for sure that he was still awake. She wasn’t even sure that he still wanted her. The only things she did know was that he still had suspicions about her working for Yates, that if he did want her, he didn’t want to…and that she needed to be close to him. When she found him on the back porch, her heart had swelled slightly before she tamped those feelings back down. The way he was sitting wi
th his head in hands…didn’t that mean he was upset? Didn’t it say that he wanted to be with her but thought he’d messed up too badly? If she was right, then going to him was the right thing to do. If she was wrong, then it could be the end of any chance she had of staying there. But didn’t him asking her to come upstairs with him say that she was right?
She didn’t know. She could hope and she could dream, but she didn’t know.
* * *
Clay tightened his arm when he felt her stir then start to shift away from him.