Love Beyond Wanting

by Bethany Claire

  Maddock turned to follow the man as he brushed past his mother and stepped out of the house.

  “The lass is at the inn, aye?”

  Maddock called after him as Brachan moved in that direction. “Aye, first room at the top of the stairs.”

  Maddock slowed to watch Brachan as he made his way to the inn. The man even ran like Nicol.

  If Brachan’s appearance hadn’t been enough to convince him, the reaction of the boy’s mother would’ve done the job.

  Nicol had a son.

  One that wasn’t Freya’s.

  One that Maddock suspected Nicol knew nothing about.

  Chapter 18

  “There ye are, lass. Sit up and drink this for me. Every bit. I know it tastes horrid, but ’twill help ye with that cough.”

  Hands were on me, gently lifting me from where I lay on a thin, worn mattress in the middle of some obscure village in the middle of seventeenth century Scotland. So far, this century wasn’t treating me too kindly.

  I knew I still had a fever. My vision was slightly blurry as I struggled to open my eyes, and I felt so weak I could barely hold up my head.

  The man sitting next to me was new, but his eyes were kind and warm and his tone was so reassuring that I didn’t doubt his claims that the medicine would help. Shakily, I opened my mouth to accept the wooden cup he brought to my lips. The stench of the thick liquid nearly made me gag, but as I was already warned, I inhaled through my nose and swallowed every drop of the man’s potion.

  “Thank…thank you.”

  “No need, lass. ’Twill make ye sleepy. Doona fight it. I’ll be here when ye wake up. We will see how ye are feeling then.”

  Whatever was in the concoction worked quickly, as my eyes were already drifting closed.

  *

  By the time I woke, it was morning. When I opened my eyes, I was no longer worried I would die. My fever had broken, and I was able to push myself up. Mr. Crinkles crawled up my legs to collapse in my lap and purr. He’d been worried. And so had my mother, if the tears running down her face were any indication. But instead of kissing me, she walked right over to the medicine man, threw her arms around him, and kissed his cheeks up and down.

  “Thank you, thank you, thank you. Is she well? Will she live? I mean, I can see that she’s much better, but is she…is she out of the woods yet?”

  My mom continued to ramble as the saintlike-in-his-patience man slowly peeled my mother off him and stepped closer to me.

  “Ye needn’t thank me. I willna be able to tell ye anything until I’ve examined her more closely. Could ye all step outside a moment?”

  Mom nodded and ushered everyone outside. I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen her move so quickly.

  Once we were alone, the man walked over to the bed and gently laid one hand on my calf. “Can ye sit all the way up for me, lass? I need to see ye in better light.”

  It took some effort, but I managed to prop myself up, slide my legs out, and sit on the bed’s edge mimicking him.

  “What’s the verdict? I’ll live, right? I really do feel much better.”

  He smiled, and it made his green eyes pop amongst his mass of already-graying hair. He looked so familiar and not in the sense that I’d seen someone that looked like him before. I had the overwhelming sense that I’d seen him before.

  “Ye would’ve lived without my assistance, though I do believe ye shall heal more quickly now. Might I…” He hesitated and gently lifted his palms very close to my face.

  I nodded. “Do whatever you need to. I’ve had my fair share of experience with doctors.”

  “Doctors?”

  I quickly corrected myself. “Healers.”

  “Ah. Is that what Old Man Wilson told ye I was?” He moved his hands to either side of my face, gently cupping it as he lifted my chin and examined me. “They’re all so protective of me.”

  I looked down at him as he lifted my chin. “Aren’t you?”

  Rolling his hands forward, he moved my chin down so that I stared straight at him. He looked into my eyes for a minute as if he were looking for something within my pupils.

  “Aye, I can be when ’tis necessary for me to be.”

  I found the strange man intriguing. Other than his graying hair—although, even that suited him—he appeared quite young, but he didn’t come across as young in the way he spoke or carried himself. He reminded me of Laurel in that sense—a bit of an old soul in a young body.

  “And what are you when it isn’t necessary for you to be a healer?”

  He didn’t answer me. Instead, he dropped his hands from my face and nodded toward the elbow on my left arm. “How often does that burn hurt ye?”

  I frowned suspiciously at him. I’d just been thinking to myself that it was aching again, but my arm was covered by my dress, and I didn’t think I’d held it funny or gestured to it in any way. How did he even know it was hurting me? And how on Earth did he know that it was one of the very few spots on my body where I’d actually been burned in the fire?

  “Excuse me?”

  “The burn, lass. It hurts ye, aye? I can help ye with that. Turn around and allow me to loosen yer gown so ye may pull yer arm through the top.”

  I didn’t move. I just stared at him with shocked eyes.

  “Wha…how did you?”

  He quickly dismissed me as he reached behind and began to undo my laces.

  “Doona worry. I doona mean to be forward. I just wish to examine the burn.”

  It hadn’t even occurred to me that he had. I had a hoard of overbearing, worried companions right outside the door. Besides, he just didn’t seem the type.

  “I’m not worried about that. How did you know there was a burn there?”

  He gave me a stare that made it very clear he had no intention of answering my question as my gown loosened at the top and I pulled my arm through.

  Once he held the arm, he moved his fingers to the wide burn that spread across the back of my arm. Gathering the seared flesh he pinched it so hard I nearly cried.

  “Ow.” I jerked away from him. “What are you doing? That hurts.”

  He gave one curt nod. “Aye, I know. Would ye rather a brief moment of pain now or longer moments of pain for the rest of yer life?”

  I frowned and hesitantly offered him my arm. “I don’t see how pinching it is going to do anything.”

  He grabbed onto the damaged skin once again. Although he didn’t let go, his eyes did soften when he saw that I was stifling a groan.

  Eventually, the pain turned to warmth, and by the time he released my arm, it no longer ached at all.

  I wanted to rub the spot, but since my lack of another hand prevented me from doing that, I simply twisted the arm around. I could feel nothing. It felt entirely normal.

  “What did you do?”

  He shook his head in another non-answer.

  “I must go. I’ve already stayed longer than I said I would. Ye will live, lass. I see no more sickness inside ye, but ye shall be weak for a few days still. Ye shouldna spend much time out of doors for the next fortnight, or ye could risk falling ill again. ’Twas a pleasure to meet ye.”

  I twisted my head in confusion as he neared the door.

  “Did we actually meet? I don’t remember telling you my name.”

  Just as his hand reached for the door, he twisted back and gave me a shy smile.

  “Ye dinna, Kate. Good day to ye.”

  He left without another word.

  Chapter 19

  Myla wasn’t pleased with their plan, but Maddock could tell by the look of resignation in her eyes that she agreed it was the only thing to do under the circumstances. Even though Kate was much improved, four more days of riding through rain and mud in freezing temperatures would do nothing to help with her recovery.

  “Fine. I know that David and I can’t keep up with the speed that Kate needs us to be moving. But Maddock, I swear to you, if she dies on the way to the castle while under your care, I will kill you myse
lf.”

  He believed her. The woman had a fire in her eyes that sent a chill down his spine.

  “I swear to ye that I will see her safely to the Isle. By the time the rest of ye arrive, she shall be rested and fully recovered. Ye have my word.”

  “I will keep you to it. When will you leave?”

  He’d readied his horse and gathered food from the village while Brachan had examined Kate this morning.

  “As soon as ye’ve said goodbye to her, I shall collect her and carry her downstairs.”

  While Myla and David spoke with Kate, Maddock went to see to one last thing he hoped would make the hard ride a little easier. Earlier that morning while gathering bread and dried fish for their trip, he’d noticed a small wooden box that was just the perfect size for Kate’s beloved cat, out in front of the inn. The old man—just like he’d been the night before—was sitting by the fire.

  “Thank ye for telling me of the healer. The lass is much improved.”

  The man turned toward him with a smile. “I told ye. All in this village stay fine and well because of that lad and his mother. Will ye be leaving today?”

  “Aye, sir. Might I ask ye…do ye have any attachment to the wee wooden box just outside?”

  The innkeeper’s thick, wiry brows pulled together. “I doona even know which box ye speak of. If ye need it, ’tis yers.”

  Stepping outside, Maddock gathered the box and hurried to the small stable where they’d boarded their horses. There was a brief break in the rain, and he hoped to leave with Kate before it began to pour once more.

  “Stella, lass.” He stroked his beloved horse gently. “Ye must ride hard and fast for us this day and part of the next. And please doona buck off this wee box I mean to strap to ye. ’Twouldn’t do for us to allow harm to come to Kate’s cat.” He leaned in to nuzzle into her neck. “If ye behave, I shall give ye a bushel of apples when we arrive home.”

  The horse neighed. Assuming he had permission, he took straps of leather from his satchel and stabilized the box just behind Stella’s saddle. Once it was secure, he took some hay from around Stella’s feet and placed it in the box to form a bed.

  Maddock laughed as Stella turned her head as if she meant to look back and see what he’d done to her. “Just one last touch, lass, and I shall have to go get the wee beastie ye shall carry along with us.”

  Taking his dagger, he cut off a wide piece of his kilt. It no longer looked as nice, but as long as there was still fabric to cover him, he didn’t mind.

  Taking the plaid fabric, he folded it twice and lay it on top of the hay to form a bed for the one-eyed feline.

  “Ye sit tight, Stella. I’ll just be a moment.”

  Grabbing one of the dried fish and a small wooden bowl from his belongings, he made his way back to the inn where the old man graciously poured a wee dram of milk into the bowl for him to take upstairs to Kate’s room. She was awake and looked much more like herself when he entered. She immediately tried to dissuade him from his plan.

  “I really do think I’d be okay if we stayed with the rest of the group.”

  Ignoring her, he set the bowl down on the floor, lay the dried fish next to it, and grabbed Mr. Crinkles off the bed.

  The cat meowed. As he placed the creature down by the food, it quickly began to lap it up.

  Kate’s bare feet appeared in his line of sight as he crouched down next to the cat.

  “Oh, Maddock. Thank you so much. I’ve been slipping him bits of food I packed for him from my own time, but I know he’s grateful. This trip has been misery for him.”

  He looked up at her as he rose from his place on the floor and smiled.

  “It has been misery on us all, lass. Most of all ye. Which is precisely why we must separate from the group. I doona believe ye’ve strength enough to last on the road another four days. Doona worry. Ye willna have to leave yer wee cat behind. I’ve made him something that will keep him dry, warm, and will allow him to at least stand and turn around should he need to.”

  Kate’s eyes lit up at his words. The sight of her smiling again after so many hours of being frightened for her health pleased him to no end.

  “What is it?”

  “Ye shall see as soon as ye’ve finished dressing and are ready to go.”

  “I am dressed.”

  He pointed to the bare feet sticking out from underneath her dress. “I’ll not be letting ye ride in this weather with yer feet uncovered.”

  Kate nodded and moved back to the edge of the bed. “Would you mind sending my mother back in? Normally, I could manage just fine, but I’m still very shaky. I’m afraid if I bend over and attempt to slip those boots on, I’ll faint again.”

  He shook his head and reached for the pair of delicate boots sitting by the door.

  “All ye need is to slip them on, aye? I can help ye with that.” He hesitated. “If ye doona mind, that is.”

  She shook her head and lifted her leg. “I don’t.”

  He grabbed the thick wool stockings Sydney had given them and bent at Kate’s feet. There was something oddly intimate about sliding the fabric over her feet. It made him warm, and suddenly all of his clothes felt tight. He needed to distract himself, lest he start panting right in front of her.

  “What did Brachan say to ye? Did he give ye any remedy to take again or tell ye anything to do that might help?”

  Kate sighed, and the breathy sound only increased his discomfort as he pulled the sock up to her knee.

  “Brachan, is it? Well, I’m glad someone knows his name. He didn’t tell me much of anything. He just looked at my face for a while and then pinched the crap out of my arm. Speaking of which, look at this. It’s incredible.”

  He looked up as she pulled her arm from its sleeve and popped it out the top of her dress. He gasped as the fabric nearly fell free down her front, but she quickly caught it with her arm. God help him, what was the lass doing? Not only did he have his hands near her thigh, but her gown was undone as well.

  “What are ye…what are ye doing, Kate?”

  “Look at this.” She lifted her left arm, and with the stub of her right arm gently touched her left elbow to direct his attention there. He looked up at the pale flesh and shrugged in confusion.

  “What am I meant to see, lass?”

  “I had a burn there. One of only three I received from the fire. Touch it. It’s smooth now, right? It doesn’t just look that way? The burn is gone, isn’t it?”

  Taking a breath to steady himself, he reached toward the tender side of her arm and brushed his fingers against the flawless skin. He knew of no herbs or tinctures capable of healing wounds so well.

  “’Twas it truly burned, lass? For there is no sign of it now.”

  Her tone was entirely sincere. “Yes, I swear that it was. How could he do that? What sort of herb or whatever you guys use in this time could do that?”

  Maddock shook his head. There was only one thing that could provide such results so quickly. The mystery surrounding Nicol’s son seemed to thicken with every passing second.

  “No salve did that, lass. He used magic. Quite powerful magic, at that.”

  Chapter 20

  Brachan braced himself as he stepped back inside their small home in the heart of the village. He knew his mother worried for him, but turning away those in need of his help was no way to protect him.

  “Ach, there ye are. If ye hadna walked in that door just now, I meant to go and look for ye myself. What is the matter with ye, lad? Ye put yerself in danger last night. And for what? For the sake of some lass ye doona even know? Ye are a fool.”

  He was weary from his night of keeping watch over the girl, but he had far too many questions to sleep. The travelers at the inn were a key to his past, to who he truly was. His mother’s panicked reaction to Maddock’s mention of the Isle had revealed that much to him. It was time for his mother to tell him the rest.

  “I was in no danger amongst them. Where is Willy?”

  “With
his sheep. He left to work them at dawn.”

  He nodded and reached for his mother’s hand as he led her to the two chairs near the fire. “Good, then ye may finally tell me the truth. The man Maddock claimed I resembled—Nicol Murray. He is my father, aye?”

  His mother said nothing as she bent her head and began to cry.

  *

  “There is no way in hell I’m letting you carry me down these stairs.”

  I planted both feet and gripped at the doorway with my left hand so he couldn’t pull me away from it.

  “Kate, lass, doona be so prideful. Ye are as weak as a babe and are trembling as ye stand.”

  “I am not…” I paused as my vision whirled and my knees buckled just a bit. It only lasted a moment, but before I could take a deep breath and regroup, Maddock already had me in his arms.

  “I know ye doona take well to being ordered about, but for the next day and a half, ye will have to listen to what I tell ye to do. We will ride hard for the Isle, and I will rarely need to stop, so if ye need to halt, ye must say so.”

  Mom, David, and Paton had already led their horses into the village and were readying to begin their longer ride to the Isle via the main trail. Maddock, Mr. Crinkles, and I would take a more perilous, but faster, route.

  Once we were inside the stable, Maddock slowly lowered me to my feet next to the old, gentle horse I’d ridden this far.

  “How do ye feel? Are ye steady?”

  “I’m fine.” I reached out to pat the horse. “What will happen to this guy? We’re not taking him with us, are we?”

  Maddock shook his head and bent to pick up Mr. Crinkles who’d dutifully followed us all the way out of the inn and into the stables. “No, I’ve paid a lad from the village to see the horse back to Cagair. Here. Come and see what I did for the wee beastie.”

  Mr. Crinkles meowed as Maddock lifted him—I was slightly concerned that my cat liked Maddock more than he did me—and placed him in a small wooden box that was turned so that its top faced the front of the horse.

  With Maddock riding in front of the opening, Mr. Crinkles would be warm while still having plenty of air and room to stand up and move about just a little. Most importantly, he would be dry.