Crash & Burn (Into The Fire Series Book 10)

by J. H. Croix

  We had several tables scattered in the kitchen area. I knew the rhythm of being a firefighter well. The main adjustment to being a hotshot firefighter was that most of our work ran from spring to autumn. We flew out wherever and whenever we were needed. In Alaska, Willow Brook Fire & Rescue served as a regional hub for three hotshot crews, all of which rotated, covering local duty for the town as well.

  The station had one small local crew. The hotshot crews were twenty-five members apiece, so there was a large contingent here in town, although, only some crewmembers stayed here all year.

  During the summer months, at any given point, two or three of the hotshot crews were called out to locations. We mostly served Alaska, yet we also flew anywhere we were needed, primarily in the western United States. Alaska was so large geographically, with such massive stretches of wilderness, there was plenty to do here in the summers. Alaska, like most of the West, had seen an uptick during fire season with hotter summers. The state also struggled with the aftermath of areas hit with spruce bark beetle, which had killed off large swathes of forest and created acres upon acres of fire fuel.

  I took a sip of my coffee, glancing between Jesse and Beck. “So, what’s our schedule for the rest of the week?”

  Beck shrugged. “I was just arguing with Jesse over whether our crew would stay local for the rest of the week, or yours. We have a call out to do some more prep work outside Fairbanks in an area that got hit hard last year.”

  Normally, I would shrug and not care one iota. I loved my job and being out in the wilderness. But I was thinking tonight, I’d rather see Rachel again. I wasn’t about to share that detail with these guys. Not now.

  “When do we need to be out there?” I asked instead.

  Jesse chuckled, rolling his eyes at Beck. “Not until next week. I call dibs staying next week. We’ve already traveled more this spring. In another month, it’s going to be crazy busy.”

  Beck flashed a grin. “Fine, fine.”

  “Meet us at Wildlands tonight?” Beck asked as he stood from the table, draining the rest of his coffee.

  “Oh yeah, I’ll be there,” Jesse replied. “Charlie already ordered me. I guess she’ll be there with Rachel after they finish up at work, which means the rest of us better show up.”

  Beck chuckled as he strode over to the kitchen counter, putting his empty coffee cup in the dishwasher before heading to the hallway that led up front. “Exactly why I’ll be there. I already have my marching orders from Maisie.”

  At the mere thought of seeing Rachel, anticipation shot through my body. “I’ll be there,” I replied, just as my phone vibrated in my pocket. Pulling it out, my sister’s name flashed on the screen. “Catch y’all later, need to take this.”

  “Hey, Shay,” I said as I stood from the table and brought the phone to my ear.

  “Hey, hey, Remy,” she replied, her tone cheery. “I was calling to see how your date went.”

  I’d completely forgotten I even told her I had a dinner date with Rachel. My mind flashed to the feel of Rachel clenching around me, the hazy look in her eyes with her skin pink and her lips puffy from our kisses.

  I was close to my sister, but there was no way in hell I was going to share what came to mind with her. “Fine, Shay, it went fine,” I replied with a little laugh. I walked toward the back area where it was quieter.

  “Remy, you have to give me more than that,” she protested.

  What Shay wanted for me was to fall in love. With the way my heart sped at the thought of Rachel, for the first time in forever, I thought it might even be a remote possibility. But I wasn’t ready to go there yet, not just now.

  “Shay, you’re my sister. You’re only going to get so much,” I said flatly.

  Shay carried on. “Was it more than dinner?” she demanded next.

  “Sweet Jesus, girl. Leave it alone. I’ll be seeing her again. How about that?”

  Shay’s returning squeal had me pulling the phone away from my ear as I leaned against the wall toward the back. With the TV on and the other guys around the station largely occupied, no one was really paying attention to my conversation, but that didn’t mean I didn’t want a little privacy.

  “That’s enough,” she said when she was done squealing.

  “Maybe I should start asking you about your love life,” I teased.

  I meant for my comment to be light, just a joke, but I could feel Shay’s pain radiating through the phone line.

  “Hey, I didn’t mean…” I began before she cut me off.

  “I know you didn’t mean anything, Remy. I should be able to handle teasing about my love life, or complete lack thereof. Plus, I’m on your case, so I guess I’m asking for it. On the subject of my love life, I was thinking of entering a convent.”

  “What?” I sputtered.

  She burst out laughing. “Hey, I’m just being realistic. My dating prospects are abysmal. I swear like a sailor, I love to read romance, I’ve got gobs of baggage, and I’m pretty sure good sex is out of the question.” Her last words contained bitterness.

  For a moment, I didn’t know what the hell to say to that, but I forged ahead anyway. “Hey, I support whatever you want to do. I don’t want to hear about your sex life any more than you want to hear about mine. But if you want to be celibate and become a nun, I got your back. I just want you to feel okay and be okay.”

  My heart clanged inside. I felt generally helpless when it came to knowing how to navigate the tricky emotional terrain involving my sister and what her ex had done to her.

  “I know you do, Remy,” she said softly. “I’m okay. Dating really isn’t on my radar right now, and I think that’s definitely for the best. And if you want me to stop teasing you about dating, I will. It’s just, you’re one of the best guys I know, and I want you to find a girl who loves you.”

  “I know you do. I’ll keep you posted. Good enough?”

  “Absolutely. Love you, Remy. I gotta go.”

  “Love you, Shay.”

  Hanging up, I headed to the front of the station, wanting to ask Rex what else he could tell me about Bruce. If I had my way, somehow, he’d get chased out of town.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Rachel

  “Oh my God, I’m so tired,” Charlie said, her hand resting on the slight curve of her belly as she sank into the chair beside my desk.

  I hit save on the chart I was working on in our electronic record system and logged out. Spinning to face her, I smiled. “You look fucking gorgeous. You’re one of those women who does pregnant really well. If I ever get pregnant, I’m pretty sure I’ll hate you for looking this good.”

  Charlie sighed and gave me a smile in return. “You’re just being nice. I’m not even that big yet, but it’s the morning sickness that’s making me miserable. It’s not limited to morning for me.” She sighed heavily.

  I wasn’t going to argue that point with her. I’d personally held her hair back when she had a rough bout of vomiting the other afternoon. But she did look absolutely gorgeous. Her skin was glowing, and she somehow managed to look great, even if she wasn’t feeling too well at times. With her dark hair and gray eyes that somehow had a hint of violet in them, my best friend was gorgeous all on her own.

  Her gaze sobered as she studied me. “I’m sorry I didn’t know Bruce was out,” she said softly.

  We weren’t the kind of friends to tiptoe around subjects. Thank God.

  “Um, that’s kind of a ridiculous thing to apologize for. It was just plain bad timing. The guy covering for Rex didn’t know what happened. Between Rex being out of town and Maisie off, it was the perfect time for Bruce to show up in Willow Brook. No one was around who knew he beat the shit out of me,” I said with a bitter laugh, tears hot behind my eyes.

  “Hey,” Charlie said softly. “Don’t say it like that.”

  “Trying to pretend it wasn’t as bad as it was doesn’t help me. That’s how I ended up backing into the whole mess with him anyway.”

  Charl
ie’s mouth twisted to the side, and she leaned forward, catching my hand in hers and giving it a firm squeeze. “I’d hug you, but I don’t feel like standing up.”

  I laughed. “I get it. We had a crazy busy day. You sure you want to go to Wildlands? You can’t drink anyway.”

  Charlie shrugged. “I don’t go for the drinks, but for my friends. Even though I’m tired, we need to go. Jesse is meeting us there, and you need to not be all up in your head.”

  After all was said and done, my friends pointed out they should’ve noticed I was making more and more excuses not to hang out with them. Part of that had been Bruce telling me who I could and couldn’t see, but the other part had been me, as Charlie put it, all up in my head.

  Conveniently, today Bruce happened to be far from my thoughts, for the most part. Instead, Remy had a starring role. After last night, I didn’t know what the hell to think.

  I didn’t know what expression crossed my face, but Charlie narrowed her eyes and cocked her head to the side. “What’s up?”

  Instantly, my cheeks heated. “What do you mean?” I countered, attempting to gloss it over.

  Charlie’s eyes took on a gleam, and she arched a brow. “I don’t know what I mean, but I know something’s up. Spill it,” she ordered.

  You might think a pregnant woman who was graced with morning sickness and tired at the end of a busy day at work wouldn’t come across as bossy. No such thing with Charlie. She commanded authority all on her own.

  She was also a good friend, the best kind of friend. She knew when I needed to process things, and now was definitely one of those times. If I was going to tell anyone about Remy, I needed to tell Charlie. I took a deep breath and let it out with a slow sigh. My heartbeat sped up, even considering talking about Remy.

  “All right, um, I spent the night with Remy,” I blurted out. As soon as I said it, I realized that didn’t even come close to capturing what had happened.

  I startled Charlie so much she actually straightened in her chair, her eyes wide. “What? Did I miss a few steps along the way? Does spending the night mean sex?”

  I bit my lip and laughed. “Yeah, I guess so. I haven’t had a chance to say anything.”

  “Yes to spending the night means sex? Or yes to I missed a few steps?”

  I sighed, feeling my cheeks heat. “Yes to both.”

  “Okay, I need details. Now.”

  “There’s not a lot. I mean, he’s totally hot, so there’s always that.”

  Charlie nodded. “Yeah, Remy is hot. Don’t think anybody’s going to argue that point. More,” she ordered, circling her hand in the air.

  “Okay, so maybe two weeks ago, I ran into him when I was out for a run with Henry. I fell in the mud in front of him, so… Well, that was just a mess. Anyway, there was, I don’t know, maybe a zing or something. Then, he asked me out to dinner, and I went. And then we made out. Then, he was gone and then he came back. He happened to be at the station yesterday after that thing with Bruce. I was all out of sorts and kind of emotional, and he came over and spent the night last night.”

  Through the jumbled mess of my explanation, when I said “then” a few too many times, Charlie’s mouth slowly fell open, her eyes as wide as saucers by the time I was done. “You mean to tell me, you went on a date with Remy and didn’t bother to tell me about it?”

  “Yeah. I didn’t see you for the last three days. Today’s the first day,” I said, scrunching my nose because I knew I could have called her.

  Charlie drummed her fingertips on the armrest as she leaned back again. She pressed her other hand against her low back with a sigh.

  “Can you take anything for that back pain?”

  Charlie shook her head. “I’d rather not. It’s not that bad. Jesse will rub my back later.”

  “Are you sure you shouldn’t just go home instead of us going to Wildlands?”

  “Hell yes, I’m sure. For starters, moving around a little bit actually helps. Plus, I’m texting Jesse in a sec and making sure that Remy will be there too. I need to see how he looks at you,” she said as she fished her phone out of her pocket and started typing on the screen.

  “You need to see how he looks at me?” I asked, genuinely curious as to what she meant.

  “Yep, that’s what I said. You’re my best friend, and it’s not cool if he just wants to fuck you.”

  “Hey, what if it’s cool with me if he just wants to fuck me?”

  The moment my question slipped out, my heart gave a funny little tumble in my chest. I couldn’t forget how I felt last night. There was how crazy hot and delicious the sex was, but more than that, there was the intimacy that spun around us like gossamer silken threads.

  Charlie was quiet for a moment. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, her eyes narrowing. “Well, if you’re okay with it, then obviously it’s okay with me. Plus, you sure deserve good sex. Something tells me Remy can bring it.”

  I knew my cheeks were bright red all over again. “Definitely,” I finally said, by some miracle keeping a perfectly straight face. I dissolved into laughter when she smiled slowly.

  After a moment, her gaze sobered. “I don’t know a lot about Remy.”

  Suddenly, emotion tightened in my throat and I wanted to cry. See, this was the thing that was so fucking awful. After being stupid enough to end up in a shitty relationship, I doubted my own judgment. Even worse, I knew my friends worried about me.

  Catching Charlie’s eyes, I shook my head. “You don’t need to worry. I know Remy’s not like that. I guess you might as well ask Jesse, though. I don’t blame you for wondering about my judgment. Trust me, I do too.”

  “Sweetie, that’s not what I meant,” Charlie said.

  When I shook my head, she sighed again. “Okay. I just worry. That’s all. None of us realized Bruce was like that at first, so it wasn’t just you. I just want you to be okay. Considering that you’ve been swearing off men for the rest of your life for the last year or so, I’m beyond thrilled to hear about Remy. Do I have your permission to be nosy and ask Jessie about Remy?” she asked softly.

  “Of course you do. After what I went through with Bruce, I’m suspicious of any man. I don’t know why I trust Remy, but I do.”

  “Honestly, my gut says he’s a good guy. But I’m still going to be nosy. Is there anything else you didn’t bother to tell me?”

  I laughed, shaking my head. “No, I swear that’s it.”

  “Okay, because I have to pee. Really bad.”

  “Oh God, you’re not gonna piss your pants, are you?” I asked, leaping from my chair and rounding my desk.

  Standing in front of her, I helped her up. Charlie shook her head once she was standing. “Not gonna ruin your chair. Even though what you were telling me was earth-shattering, I would’ve just made you come to the bathroom with me if I had to pee that bad. Be right back, and then we’re going to Wildlands.”

  Chapter Twenty

  Rachel

  I sat at a large round table in Wildlands, wondering if Remy would actually be here. Per a report from Charlie, who was sniffing out every detail she could learn about him from everyone already, Remy had told Jesse he would be here.

  As if conjured by thought alone, he appeared from the back hallway. I happened to be seated in his line of sight, purely by chance. The moment I saw him, my pulse skittered and my belly flipped. From twenty feet away or thereabouts, his eyes snagged mine, and it felt as if a flame licked through the air across the room.

  In a matter of seconds, he was pulling out the empty chair beside me. “Hey, sweetheart,” he said, his slow drawl an aphrodisiac on its own.

  “Hey.” When his hand brushed my thigh as he pulled his chair in, I almost sighed aloud.

  “Hey, man,” Levi called from across the table.

  “Hey there,” Remy replied. A few more greetings were exchanged, and the waitress arrived. Remy ordered a beer and a burger with fries, looking over to my almost empty drink when the waitress asked if he neede
d anything else. “Need a refill, sweetheart? It’s on me.”

  Tonight was half-price margarita night, and I usually only let myself have one drink. But Charlie had promised me a ride home, seeing as she couldn’t drink. Conveniently, we lived quite close to each other, so she would also bring me to work tomorrow to fetch my car. With that in mind, I decided I didn’t need to stick to my one-drink limit.

  When I looked up at Remy, my heart stuttered and then lunged. Sweet hell. The man’s eyes were just plain sex. His rich green gaze with heat flickering within had my belly somersaulting and my sex clenching.

  “Sure, I’ll take another margarita.”

  Given that we were staring at each other, it didn’t even appear we’d involved the waitress in our conversation, but she chirped, “Got it. Anything else?”

  Remy shook his head, never once looking away from me. “How was your day?” he asked when she moved on to check with someone else at the table.

  “Busy. But I like busy, I don’t like to be bored at work because then I just stare at the clock. Yours?”

  “Same. I was hoping to run into you here.”

  “Oh?”

  His lips kicked up at one corner, sending butterflies into a tizzy in my belly. “Yes. I was hoping to see you again tonight.”

  “Tonight?” I repeated, suddenly incapable of anything other than one-word responses.

  “Yes, sweetheart. Tonight.”

  “Here?”

  Even though Remy struck me slightly dumb, I also nudged at that sassy side of me, and this was fun.

  “Yes, here. And preferably naked later,” he said bluntly.

  Heat flashed up my face, and I was relieved for the dim lighting in the bar. “Oh. Well then. I suppose that could be arranged.”