Matters to Me: A Football Romance (The Hart Series Book 4)

by M. E. Carter

  “Is that because she’s so active and healthy?” Annika interjects.

  Not having seen her before, Dr. Copperman furrows his brow. I wave my hand dismissively. “It’s okay. That’s my roommate, Annika. She’s in the sports training program as of this year so this break has been of great interest to her. You can tell her whatever. I don’t care.”

  “Well, congratulations. That’s a hard program to get into,” Dr. Copperman says kindly while continuing with his ministrations. “And yes, likely the fact that she’s an athlete and treats her body as such is why she’s healing so quickly. A normal, non-athletic college student with the same injury likely wouldn’t heal as fast.”

  “Is she still looking at a four- to six-month recovery time?”

  “That’s the tricky part.” Dr. Copperman releases my leg and leans against the table next to me, crossing his arms. “Typically, I’d say yes, but as a gymnast, that means something different than it would to you or me.”

  “Because of tumbling and vault and dismounts…” I toss out, as he nods his head with every skill I mention.

  “Exactly. Bones have a remarkable way of healing and becoming strong again, but that doesn’t mean certain areas won’t be weaker than the rest. I don’t want you to jump into something and end up breaking it more severely.”

  That’s not encouraging news. “So, there’s no way I’ll be back, even for the tail end of the season.”

  “I’m afraid not.”

  I close my eyes, heart sinking. I knew it was a long shot, but I was hoping I’d get lucky, just this one time.

  “The good news is, I think we can officially move to you a walking cast.”

  My eyes fly open and I look at him in shock. “Really? No more wheelchair?”

  “Well, I wouldn’t go that far. The trick here is balancing the bone heal with not losing muscle mass that you need to support that bone. You’re going to tire easily, and when your leg starts to hurt, use that as a sign that you need to stop walking on it.”

  “But I don’t have to sit all the time. I can shower on my own and walk across campus and stuff?”

  Dr. Copperman chuckles at how delighted I am, which I admit to. This is the best news I’ve had in weeks, and I can’t wait to stand upright again.

  “If you think that’s good news, you’re going to be really happy with the next thing I have to say.”

  My eyes widen. What could he possibly say that would make me even happier than I already am?

  “You are still restricted from any sort of tumbling. No vaulting, no dismounts, nothing that could put pressure on that bone.”

  “So, no leaps,” I offer up, just to show I’m a team player.

  “Correct. However, I understand you guys have a foam pit, right?” I nod, keeping my fingers crossed about where this is going. “I’m clearing you for bar work, as long as you’re over the pit.”

  Normally, I hate bars, but right now, this is the most exciting news he could have given me. Clasping my hands together I clarify, “Release moves and everything?”

  “Only if you’re over the pit.”

  I squeal and clap my hands. I can’t help it. Even if it’s not my preferred event, it’s a huge step in the right direction. “I promise I won’t do anything more than that. Do I just go without the walking boot or wrap my leg or anything?”

  He sits down on his chair and rolls himself to the computer on the desk, using his badge to log in before making some notes while he talks. “I’m ordering you a specialized brace to wear during workouts. It won’t do anything about the pressure of walking, but it’ll keep your tibia from rotating in ways we don’t want. So, it’ll feel a little restrictive.”

  I scoff. “Not nearly as restrictive as this cast.” I knock on the plaster for effect.

  “True. I also want you to start working on building up the muscles in your shins so we’re sending you to physical therapy.”

  He takes the next few minutes to explain what exercises he wants me to do until I can get in with the PT, while Annika takes notes. Not that it’s hard to remember the various versions of calf raises, but who knows. She may need that information for a test, and I’m sure she’ll be passing the info along to the training department so they can work with me as well.

  Since it’s pretty simple to explain, he’s not there long before his assistant comes in with an electric saw to cut this baby off me. I’m ready. Not just so I can have my leg back, but because I want to shave. Casts are itchy to begin with. Adding stubbly leg hair only makes it worse.

  By the time it’s cut off and my leg cleaned of the nasty funk that no one enjoys smelling, Dr. Copperman is back with a walking boot in one hand and brace in another. “It’s your lucky day! We had both of them in the office, so you don’t have to wait.”

  Carefully, he shows me how to use each of the devices. The hardest parts are figuring out which strap goes where, but I pretend to listen intently anyway. If I have questions later, I’m sure Annika is still taking notes.

  Finally, after what feels like hours, I’m ready to walk out of here on my own two feet.

  “I want to see you back in two weeks so we can re-x-ray and see how it’s going, okay?”

  “Absolutely,” I agree. Pushing myself to standing and testing out my new footwear, I let out a sigh of relief. “You have no idea how good it feels to stand up without crutches.”

  I ignore the sounds of amusement and march out the door as best I can. Walking in a boot is going to take some getting used to, and I can already tell I’ll have to work through some soreness, but I’m ready. For the first time in days, a genuine smile crosses my face.

  “What do you want me to do with your crutches?” Annika asks as we head out the door and to the car.

  “You can toss them in a dumpster or set them on fire for all I care.” Not the most responsible answer but at least it’s honest.

  Using the key fob to unlock the car, she opens the backdoor. “Interesting ideas, but I think I’ll just put them back here instead.”

  “Works for me.” It takes a little bit of finagling to get myself in the front seat, only because I’m not used to the kind of bulk this new device has, but I have no complaints. It’s so much more comfortable than the cast was already. “I’ve never been so excited to shave my legs!” I shout when Annika gets situated next to me.

  She giggles right along with me. “I’ve never been so excited to not have to see your hoo-ha anymore.”

  I throw my head back and laugh, releasing all my pent-up stress. And then my phone vibrates against me and the good times come to a screeching halt. It’s a text from Heath.

  Hey. Call me when you can.

  I shake my head and shove my phone in my pocket, ignoring him. I’m having too good of a day today to think about him. I’m done being treated like I’m disposable. I won’t allow it to happen anymore.

  Not even by someone like Heath Germaine.

  TWENTY-EIGHT

  Heath

  During practice, I was okay.

  During weight training, I was okay.

  During class, I was okay.

  I was even okay when I sat down to catch up on some of the outstanding assignments I have.

  Now, I’m not okay.

  I have texted Lauren five times and called three. No, I didn’t leave a voicemail that last time, but after saying the same thing seven times, it started to feel redundant.

  Now I’m getting antsy. My first assumption is something happened to her, but since I never got a frantic call from Jaxon and now, he’s sitting across the room head bopping around while he studies, that’s unlikely. It also leads to the only other conclusion:

  She’s ignoring me.

  I don’t like it.

  Tapping my pen on my desk, I run the last few interactions through my brain. Yes, I was short with her yesterday, but I was exhausted and on the verge of making a major, life-altering decision. I explained as much in my second voicemail. Under the circumstances, that’s a forgivable
offense, right?

  “You gonna keep fidgeting over there, or are you going to say what’s on your mind?” Jaxon doesn’t bother lifting his head or taking off his headphones, his words confrontational enough.

  “I’m not fidgeting,” I grumble and toss my pen down. For the millionth time, I pick up my phone to check for a response. Still nothing. Huffing my frustration, I toss it down, too.

  Jaxon finally looks up. “Dude. The vibe you’re giving off is making it impossible for me to concentrate on the structure of microorganisms.”

  “I don’t even know what that means.”

  “What it means is you’re driving me up the fucking wall. What gives?”

  Knowing exactly how petty I sound, I grumble, “Lauren won’t text me back.”

  Jax pulls his headphones off finally. “I’m sorry, what?”

  I sigh and lean back in my chair. “My girlfriend. Lauren. You know her. She won’t answer me. I’ve texted and called all day, and she’s ignoring me.”

  “Ah.” Jaxon puts his headphones back on and turns back to his work.

  “That’s it?” I grab a piece of crumpled up notebook paper off my desk and toss it at his head. It misses, but he flinches. “That’s all you have to say about it?”

  “Do you blame her?” Jaxon asks without a hint of sympathy.

  Anger runs through me at his response. “My father had a heart attack, Jaxon. He could have died. Do I not get a little bit of understanding for being in my own little world because of it?”

  “She understands, Germaine. We all do. But I understand where she’s coming from, too.”

  Crossing my arms, I lean back again, glaring at him. “This ought to be good.” I wave my hand for him to continue because I’m kind of itching for a fight. Maybe it’ll take the edge off. “Please, go on.”

  He scowls at me and drops his headphones on the textbook in front of him. “Okay. Here it is. You went through a terrible ordeal. You didn’t know if your dad was going to survive, so you took off. I understand that. But when you got there and found out he was going to be fine, you didn’t bother to update anyone. Not even to say you got there safely. We were sitting down here worrying about you and you just went radio silent.”

  “I was at the hospital,” I say through gritted teeth.

  “So was your mother, but she answered when I called.” I clench my jaw. He has a point and I don’t like it. “And then he was discharged, but instead of calling your girlfriend or even texting her, you called me.”

  “So what? I didn’t have time to call everyone in my contact’s list, Jaxon.”

  “No. So you should have called the most important people on that list. And if my name is before Lauren’s, you damn sure shouldn’t be sleeping with her under false pretenses.”

  His words stop me, my mouth agape. “You think I tricked her into having sex with me?”

  “You tell me.”

  The challenge in his eyes makes me want to haul off and punch him. My nostrils flare and I have to concentrate on slowing my breathing down. “Never once, never once have I tried to get in someone’s pants just to say I scored.”

  “So, you’re telling me you have real feelings for her.”

  “I’m telling you I’m in love with her.”

  His eyebrows move up just slightly in surprise. I don’t miss the reaction probably because it’s the same one I’m having internally, except I’m battling myself right now. I love her, I know that. But I’m also pissed as hell.

  Jaxon doesn’t miss a beat when he finally drives his point home. “And yet, you ghost her for days after she finally sleeps with you.”

  I want to deny it. I want to tell him he’s wrong. But I can’t.

  “Sounds a hell of a lot like what that dick on her gymnastics team did to her, huh?”

  I lose my breath, like he punched me in the gut. All my bravado just dissipates. “It’s not the same.”

  “No?”

  “No,” I practically yell, not sure if I’m trying to convince him or myself.

  “Because I was there after you picked her up that morning, pretending to be asleep because I didn’t want to deal with you. And I’ve been with her since you took off for home the other day. And from my observations, she’s taking your dismissal even harder than last time.”

  My eyes close and chin drops to my chest as the memories of the morning I picked her up on the side of the road assault me. I remember how shattered she was all those months ago. Her normal self-confidence was nowhere to be found, stolen by a guy who didn’t deserve to get that intimate with her. And now I’ve done the same thing. It doesn’t matter that the intentions were different. The damage is still identical.

  “I have to fix this,” I say softly to myself, my anger dissipating and feeling a sudden urgency to get to Lauren and beg her forgiveness.

  “Glad you finally figured that out.” Jaxon turns back to his textbook, finally having said his piece.

  Standing up a little too quickly, my chair rolls backward and hits the wall. “I need to go see her.” Frantically, I grab my keys and phone, shoving them in my pocket. “I need to get to her dorm.”

  “They aren’t there.”

  “What? Where are they?”

  Still not looking up, Jaxon says the last thing I expected. “They went to some club.”

  It takes a few seconds for the information to register. “They did what?”

  Jaxon finally looks up as he explains. “Apparently, Lauren likes to dance whenever she has a bunch of anxious energy built up, so Annika took her to a new place. Sante? Sanve? I don’t remember the name of it.”

  “Wait. They went by themselves? They didn’t want us to go with them?”

  He stares at me blankly.

  “No, I get that they don’t want me around. But… Annika’s okay with this?”

  The side of Jaxon’s lip quirks up. It almost looks like pride that his girl is venturing out without him again.

  “It’s been eighteen months since she was attacked. She figured tonight was the night to go for it. So, fair warning, if you plan on staying here, she may have some nightmares. Or she may be fine. We’ll see.”

  I feel my own burst of pride at this new development. Annika is one of the best people I know, so for her to feel comfortable just hanging out with her friends at a club again is pretty awesome.

  “That’s great, Jaxon. I’m happy for her.”

  “Me, too.” He picks up his phone and waves it at me. “Of course, she’s texted me about a dozen times since they got there, but baby steps, right?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Plus, Paul works there now so he’s keeping an eye on them. From what I understand, he’s only serving her bottled water.”

  “Good ole’ Paul,” I say with a chuckle, but then I remember my other concern with the girls going out tonight. “Did Lauren take her chair or just use crutches?”

  Jaxon shakes his head, his disappointment returning. “Had you not been such a jackass, your girlfriend probably would have reminded you that her follow up doctor’s appointment was today. They took her cast off.”

  “What?” This is great news. News she didn’t think I’d be interested to know about. The thought puts a sour taste in my mouth. “She’s not wearing heels, though, right? She’s not ready for that.”

  “Calm down. She’s in a boot for the time being. I think she just wants to see how long she can wear it before she has to stop. And that whole anxious energy thing.”

  Again, I feel like the wind is knocked out of me. This is huge news and she didn’t tell me. Either she didn’t feel the need or didn’t think I’d care. Either way, I know I’ve screwed up badly.

  My phone chimes and hoping it’s my girlfriend, my heart jumps. It sinks just as fast when I realize it’s just Jaxon.

  “That’s the address to the club,” he says as he clicks off his phone. “Go fix this with her.”

  “I will.” Quickly, I set the GPS to figure out where I’m going. Shoving it back i
n my pocket, I head toward the door again. “And thanks, man.”

  “Germaine.” I stop in my tracks at the tone of my best friend’s voice.

  “Yeah?”

  “You got in my face when I was treating Annika in a way she didn’t deserve. Consider this payback.” I nod in understanding. “But know the same rules apply. You pull this shit again, and I’ll personally kick your ass.”

  “Noted and appreciated, brother.”

  He nods once and turns back to his book, probably smiling like he just single-handedly fixed my relationship. I’ll let him have his moment. I’ve got to do my part to make it right, too.

  TWENTY-NINE

  Lauren

  The beat of the music feels so good as it pulses through my body. It’s like a part of me that has been missing is finally back. Maybe not the music. My trusty sidekick, Steven Tyler, has been with me all this time. But being able to move to the music has been long overdue.

  I’m a little clunky with this boot, definitely not graceful, and people are giving me a wide berth, but I don’t care. Being able to put on a pair of silk shorts without worrying about them snagging on plaster and an off-the-shoulder crop top without thinking about crutches, then getting gussied up for a night out feels like a dream come true. I don’t even mind that I have to wear flat shoes with my boot. Well, one flat anyway. It’s a small price to pay to get off campus and dance the night away.

  This new place is okay. It’s like a cross between a club and a bar, with a decent-sized dance floor in front of a stage. A giant wooden bar is off to the side and there are tables anywhere the dance floor isn’t. It’s almost like the venue is having some sort of identity crisis. It wouldn’t necessarily be my first choice of places to frequent, but Paul, Jaxon’s old boss from Ambrosia, is here, making it the perfect place for Annika and me to go by ourselves. And the fact that it’s not nearly as crowded as an actual club keeps me from worrying too much about me or my boot getting stepped on.