How to Liv

by Megan Keith

  “Thanks for driving me home,” I said, unlocking my front door. Joel handed me my flowers and I put them down on the table just inside the door, before taking a couple of steps back towards him.

  “Anytime.” He took a tentative step my way. His arms circled my waist, drawing me close. He ducked his head a little. “Hey, don’t you mean spanks?”

  “You’re right, spanks.” I chuckled as I looked up at him.

  His eyes sparkled with humour and his lips curved into a smile. He was so damn handsome I felt butterflies in my stomach just looking at him. I don’t remember the last time I felt this way.

  I may have been a little drunk but that did not stop me from feeling completely safe and incredibly horny in his arms. It was a really nice feeling, horniness, a feeling that had long been missing from my life. As much as I wanted to drag him inside, and into my bed, I couldn’t do it. It had been so long since I’d had sex - I didn’t want to break my dry spell while I was half-drunk. If this guy was going to take me, I’d want to remember every single moment.

  I think Joel realised how intoxicated I was too, he wasn’t about to push the issue, he was a true gentleman after all. ‘Spank you for sleeping with me’… well maybe not.

  He leant forward, his face closing in on mine. My fingers clenched his shirt above his hips as anticipation overtook my senses. When our lips met I felt a spark of arousal but he pulled away all too soon. The kiss he gave me was nothing more than a chaste peck really, but still enough for me to want more. We broke apart instead.

  “Well, good night, then.” I smiled at him.

  “Good night, Liv. I’ll see you about midday tomorrow.”

  I crashed as soon as my head hit the pillow and awoke with a fright the next morning. I moved sluggishly from my bed, concerned that I would have a terrible hangover. I walked slowly to the bathroom, waiting for it to kick in and was really happy that it didn’t. I felt perfectly fine. After using the toilet I opened the door and bumped into a hard bare chest. Looking up I found a man that I had never seen before. He had a warm and gentle smile.

  “Morning,” he murmured, manoeuvring past me into the bathroom and shutting the door behind him.

  Most people would scream at a stranger in their house, but one walking casually around my place, in a pair of boxers only meant one thing - Ally picked up last night. I wonder what happened to Daniel.

  I made my way to the kitchen to pour myself a huge glass of orange juice and downed it within seconds. I poured myself a second and sat at the breakfast bar, gazing out the window into my tiny, neglected courtyard. The sun was already blazing through the kitchen window. It was going to be another hot day, apparently about thirty-four degrees, if you trusted the weather app on my phone. It was already warming up my house before ten o’clock in the morning, so maybe it was right.

  My eyes drifted down to the broken floor tile in front of the oven. It had been like that since I’d moved in six years ago. I’d never got around to replacing it because I hated the ugly brown tiles and was planning to get rid of the whole lot one day. I’d been saying that since the day I moved in. Just like I was always going to repaint the walls, update the shower screen and turn the courtyard into something pretty. So far I was yet to do any of those things.

  Looking at the tiles made me think of Joel. He was a tiler after all, maybe I could get him to do it. I’d pay him of course, but would that be awkward? Hiring him as a contractor? Absentmindedly my thoughts drifted away from the tiles and turned to the tiler himself. I wonder where he’s planning on taking me today.

  Ally walked into the lounge room behind me with her mystery man, breaking me from my daydreams about Joel. She walked him out the front door, closing it quickly behind him. Then she stalked her way over to the kitchen to turn on the kettle.

  “What, you couldn’t offer him a coffee before he left?”

  She gave me a snarl at my comment.

  “Good night was it?” I sniggered in response.

  “Yep.” She leaned back against the bench looking at me with a smile. “What about you? No sleepovers? Did you kick Joel out already?”

  “Ally!”

  “I take that as a no. You know, it wouldn’t kill you to actually have sex on occasion. Don’t you miss it? I’m sure Joel would be up for it.”

  Now I’m not a prude, but I don’t sleep around either, and my sister was currently turning it into her new favourite pastime. It annoyed me, though I’m not exactly sure why.

  “I’m not like you Ally,” I said quietly.

  “No you’re not.”

  For some reason that comment annoyed me even more. I’m sure she was implying that she was better than me. She was more desirable to men, I knew that, but I hated when she was in one of those moods, the type where she likes to rub it in. I took my juice back to my room after that. The sooner she moves out the better.

  I lazed around on my bed for a while watching the small TV I had in there, avoiding Ally. I snuck into the bathroom at about eleven-thirty to have a shower and get ready for my date with Joel. My hair was still holding since my visit to the hairdressers, so I avoided getting it wet and just ran a comb through it instead. Why is it that I normally have to wash it like every second day, but after a visit to the hairdressers I can go longer than that? Maybe next time I should buy some of their shampoo.

  I put on a yellow sundress, it was simple, fitted with a swinging skirt. It had buttons down the front with a low scoop neckline. Together with my new haircut, the dress showed a lot of skin, my neck was bare.

  When I was ready, I found Ally in the lounge room watching TV. I noticed my box of beautiful flowers from last night still sitting on the table by the door. I took them to the kitchen to give them some water and then placed them in the centre of my dining room table. Almost noon, Joel will be here any minute.

  Ally casually looked over her shoulder at me when I re-entered the lounge. When she eyed my outfit she sat up straighter and angled her body towards mine.

  “You look nice Libby.” Apparently she was in a better mood than before.

  “Thanks,” I replied, taking a seat opposite her. I glanced at my watch. 11:53, any minute now. I smoothed down my dress and took a deep breath.

  “You look nervous too.” Ever observant; Ally’s attention was only making me feel worse.

  “Joel’s taking me out.”

  “Oh really?”

  Yeah thanks for the support Ally, you don’t have to sound so surprised.

  She eyed me impassively for a moment before adding, half-heartedly, “That’s great! Where’s he taking you?”

  “It’s a surprise.”

  I heard a car pull up. Looking out the window from where I was seated I caught a glimpse of something silver and knew it was Joel’s ute. I grabbed my bag from the kitchen bench where I had left it and put on my thongs. My heart jumped when Joel knocked at the door. I raced to answer before Ally got the chance.

  “Hey.”

  “Hi.”

  Joel looked delicious in a pair of jean shorts and a white t-shirt that was tight across his chest which made it hard to tear my eyes away from there.

  “Happy birthday!” He handed me a gift bag. “I know you said no gifts, but technically this is just a snack… or in your case it could be dinner.” He laughed loudly.

  I curiously opened the bag and revealed the largest packet of Tim Tams I had ever seen.

  “Wow! I’ve never seen one so big.” I laughed heartily.

  “With comments like that you have my attention.” Ally purred as she came up behind me. “Hello, Joel, good to see you again.”

  “Hi.” Joel smiled at her.

  “What’s so big?” Ally asked.

  “These,” I opened up the gift bag for her to see the biscuits inside. “How did you get these?” I asked Joel, unable to hide the awe in my voice.

  “It’s a caterer’s pack. I have a connection.”

  “Thank you.” And I meant it whole-heartedly - that packet was goi
ng to keep me in supply for a while.

  “You ready to go?” Joel asked. His brown-green-blue eyes gave me the once over, causing me to blush.

  “Yep.” I put the Tim Tams on the table beside the door and grabbed my bag.

  “Libby, I’m going out to Rachel’s in about an hour. I’ve got a shift tonight, so I’m going to head straight there after that. Can you buy some milk today?”

  “Sure. See ya.” I turned to Ally and gave her a wave.

  “Have fun you two.” She closed the door behind me. Joel grabbed my hand and pulled me towards his old silver ute.

  “Am I dressed okay? I had no idea what to wear seeing as I have no idea where we’re going.”

  “You’re perfect.” His gaze wandered down my body and his words set me on fire, even though I could sense a slight nervousness in his voice. His cheeks went red with embarrassment but when I smiled at him, his face visibly relaxed. He opened the passenger door for me to get in and spoke more confidently, “You look beautiful.”

  Then it was my turn to blush.

  “I haven’t heard this song in like forever,” I said to Joel when, a moment later, he started the car and the song ‘Penguins & Polar Bears’ started playing. “Millencolin, right? There are no penguins or polar bears mentioned in the song, I’ve never understood that. I love it though.”

  “Me too. Another thing in common.” He smiled at me before putting the car in reverse and backing down the driveway.

  There was something about being beside Joel that made me relax. The nerves I was feeling only minutes ago, while waiting for him to arrive, vanished rather rapidly as I soaked in the music coming from his stereo. The short song gave way to another. I turned my head against the seat to look at him, when I recognised the song as ‘November Rain’.

  “You still re-living your youth?” I asked, reminded of our telephone conversation.

  “Yeah, I made a playlist of oldies. I thought you might appreciate that now you’re thirty and all.”

  “Hey!”

  “I wasn’t having a go, honest.” He laughed in response.

  “How old are you anyway?”

  “I’m thirty-five.” He kept his eyes on the road as he spoke.

  And still single? How is that possible?

  “So where are you taking me, old man?” I teased.

  “Hey! I’ll have none of that! You respect your elders, young lady.” He laughed.

  “You’re not that old!”

  “No I’m not, and I already told you it’s a surprise. Just relax and enjoy the ride.”

  He turned to me and wriggled his eyebrows up and down, making me laugh as Guns ‘n’ Roses continued to play. Cheeky. When his eyes re-focused on the road I looked out the window and couldn’t even guess where we were headed. All I knew was we were going further and further out of town.

  Twenty minutes later, Joel pulled the car a little ways down a dirt road and stopped. There were open paddocks of what appeared to be a farm on our right. Off to my left all I could see were trees and thick bushes. Joel cut the ignition and turned to me.

  “We’re here.”

  “We’re where exactly? Don’t tell me this is where, weeks from now, the police will find my body?”

  Joel only laughed at that and got out of the car. I reluctantly followed him into the heat. Joel pulled the cover off the tray of his ute revealing a big wicker basket which he collected and then covered with a red tartan blanket.

  “A picnic?”

  “Yes, we’re having a picnic.”

  Joel replaced the cover over the tray of his ute then took my hand. He pulled me towards the bushes.

  “Um, you do realise that I’m only wearing thongs, right? I’m not really dressed for hiking through the scrub.” I still allowed him to pull me along though.

  “Good thing there’s a path then.”

  He nodded in front of us to a wide dirt path that I hadn’t noticed from the road.

  “We’re not walking far. You have to trust me, I am older and wiser than you, you know.”

  “Right.” I giggled.

  It really wasn’t much of a walk at all, maybe twenty-five metres at most, before we came to a clearing beside a little creek. It was much cooler under the shade of the trees.

  Joel put the basket down and then flicked his wrist to lay the blanket out. I grabbed one end and helped to smooth it down before taking a seat on it.

  He sat down beside me, so we were both facing the creek. There were tall snow gums, ferns of all shapes and sizes and mossy covered rocks. The sunlight trickled through the trees creating a beautiful dappled light. The sound of the babbling water and the birds adding to the stunning ambience of the spot. It was so pretty I wanted to take a picture so I would always remember.

  “Wow, it’s beautiful here!” I exclaimed in awe.

  “It is.” I met Joel’s eyes and my heart skipped a beat. He had been watching me as I took in our surroundings. We stared at each other for a moment before Joel cleared his throat, “Are you hungry?”

  I nodded. He reached into the basket and produced a couple of bread rolls wrapped in Glad Wrap.

  “I figured I couldn’t go wrong with roast chicken and salad.”

  “Perfect.”

  I took the roll he handed to me and began unwrapping it. He placed his down on the picnic rug and returned his attention to the basket.

  “I have Coke, lemonade or water. What would you like to drink?”

  “Lemonade would be great thanks.”

  He handed me the cold can before opening the Coke for himself. He replaced the lid on the basket and put his drink on top. I opened my can, took a sip and placed it beside his. We both took bites of our rolls before swallowing and turning towards each other, we spoke at the same time.

  “Is the roll okay?” - “How did you find this place?” He nodded at me to respond first.

  “Yes thank you, the roll is delicious,” I replied. I wasn’t exaggerating either, it wasn’t a chicken loaf but actual roast chicken pieces, with a flavoursome salad. “Did you make these yourself?”

  “I did.” His answer surprised me, I had expected him to say that he’d cheated and bought them from a deli on his way over to pick me up.

  “Very yummy. So how did you find this place?”

  “I have a connection.” He smiled shyly, repeating his words from earlier. “I actually come here often. I have family that live nearby.”

  “Well spank you for bringing me here. It’s lovely.” I nodded, unable to stop myself from wondering if he had brought other girls here.

  “You’re the first person I’ve brought here,” he answered my unspoken question, and I couldn’t help the gleeful smile that spread across my face. “Well, other than my dog Ruby who just thinks she’s a person.” We both laughed at that. I watched Joel lift his legs, bending his knees, he leant forward resting his forearms on them. “I thought I’d take a short cut one day and I got lost. I was frustrated, in a bad mood. I slammed on the brakes, got out of the car to take a breather and spotted the path. I could hear the running water and decided to wander. I’ve come back many times since, it’s a beautiful spot to just sit and think… It feels… this is gonna sound stupid, but it feels like I was meant to find this place.” He looked embarrassed for a moment and I loved that. I silently stared at him. “Does that sound weird?”

  “No… it sounds like it was meant to be.”

  Those words I spoke felt as though they had more meaning behind them than just the landscape in front of us. Our eyes caught again then and I could see something burning behind his. I wondered if maybe he was thinking the same as me. I watched as Joel blinked a couple of times before turning away to take another bite of his roll. I diverted my attention from watching him and did the same.

  “So how long has your sister been living with you?” Joel asked.

  “A few months. Hopefully not much longer, it was only meant to be a temporary solution.”

  “You get along well?”

/>   “Most of the time. Do you have any brothers or sisters?”

  “A brother.”

  Joel nodded his head but didn’t say anything else. I couldn’t help but wonder what he was thinking.

  We ate the remainder of our rolls in a comfortable silence, taking in our surroundings. There was a light breeze, and sitting in the shade of the trees, it was just perfect. Holding my can of lemonade in one hand I leant back on my other, stretching my legs out in front of me. I closed my eyes and lifted my face towards the sky as the light flickered through the trees, creating swaying shadows behind my eyelids. Letting out a contented sigh I was unable to stop my lips from curving into a relaxed smile. When I opened my eyes moments later, Joel was watching me.

  “I really like it here. I’m glad you brought me,” I explained.

  “I’m glad I brought you here, too.” He spoke softly the flickering light making his colourful eyes seem like they were dancing as he stared at me. I watched as he leant back on his elbows and looked up to the sky. “Have you ever noticed how nature looks so different from this angle?”

  I followed his line of sight and looked up into the trees whose branches swayed slightly, momentarily blinding me as the sun broke through.

  “It’s definitely much brighter,” I said, squinting at him. “Blindingly so.” I giggled. Joel laid further back, folding his arms behind his head, and flattening his back to the ground. He continued to look serenely upwards.

  “You need to position yourself just right to keep the sun out of your eyes.”

  “Okay.” I followed his lead and lay back on the blanket too, adjusting my head slightly so a thick branch blocked out the sun. “That’s better.”

  I watched the gum leaves swaying gently, the light breaking through in mesmerizing patterns. He was right, things did look much different from this angle.

  “So what do you like to think about when you come here?”

  “Anything and nothing. If I have something playing on my mind, it’s a great place to clear it, you know? I can gain a different perspective on things out here in the quiet, this spot brings me back down to earth.”

  “Literally, we are lying on the ground after all.” I joked and he let out a small chuckle.