A Father's Pledge

by Eleanor Jones

  Ben nodded, suddenly forlorn. “Granddad forgot it...and Grandma forgot my present.”

  “Maybe she was just busy,” suggested Kat.

  “She’s always busy,” Ben said. “That’s why she doesn’t want me to live with her anymore.”

  “That’s not true, Ben. She just thought it would be better for you to be at Flight so you could do things like sea therapy...and get to know your dad.”

  “No point. He’ll probably leave, too, once he gets to know me.”

  “Like your granddad, you mean?”

  Ben scowled. “No...that’s different.”

  “I’m not going anywhere, Ben,” Luke insisted. “You don’t need to worry about that.” He lightened his tone. “In fact, all you have to worry about right now is which bike you’re going to choose. You can ride one, right?”

  That seemed to lift Ben out of his dark mood. “Course I can—you’ll see.”

  Luke parked in the center of town, outside the bank, and they headed down the street toward the bike shop. Kat found it strange to be walking along with Luke and Ben, strange and kind of awkward. At first, she trailed behind them, but when Ben kept looking back she moved up alongside him, matching his steps with hers, which made him smile.

  The bicycle shop had an old-fashioned facade, but inside it was strictly modern, with dozens of bikes on display. A middle-aged man came over to help them and Luke asked to see what they had in stock that might suit a nine-year-old.

  Ben said nothing, but Kat could tell he was excited. He wriggled from foot to foot, as if he could hardly believe that this was actually happening. She caught Luke’s eye and he winked, looking almost as excited as his son. This could be a big step toward forming a healthy father-son relationship, she thought, feeling good inside.

  As soon as the red-and-silver bike appeared, it was obvious that nothing else would do. Ben rode it in small circles around the store, grinning from ear to ear, and Luke pulled out his credit card. “I think this will have to be a Christmas and birthday present all rolled into one. You’re sure this is the one you want?”

  “Yes!” Ben cried, holding on tight to the handlebars. “It’s brilliant.” He stopped pedaling and looked pointedly at Luke. “Is it for all the Christmases and birthdays you missed, or just for this year?”

  Luke’s jaw was set, but Kat could tell he wasn’t sure how to react. She felt an unexpected lurch of sympathy for him. Everyone made mistakes in life and at least now he was trying to make amends. She just wished she could get rid of the horrible feeling that Ben was only putting up with his dad so he could get a bike. Luke seemed to be about to respond to Ben’s jibe, but he turned away abruptly and headed for the counter, clutching his wallet. When Ben proudly pushed his new bike out of the shop while Luke settled up, Kat took the opportunity to talk to the boy in private.

  “It’s a beautiful bike,” she said. “Aren’t you going to say thank you to your dad?”

  Ben shrugged. “You heard what he said. He’s only buying it for me to make up for what he missed. It’s to make him feel better, not me.”

  “Maybe it’s for both of you,” Kat suggested. “Why don’t you give him a second chance? I’m sure he’s very sorry about everything he’s missed. And it won’t hurt you to thank him. Remember what we talked about with the sea creatures? Being kind is part of becoming someone special. He is your dad, after all.”

  “My granddad’s more like a real dad,” Ben muttered. “Or at least he was.”

  “So what happened to him?” Kat asked, tired of skirting around the subject.

  Deliberately ignoring her, Ben turned his attention to his bike just as Luke appeared, looking pleased with himself. “Please, Ben,” Kat murmured. “Just keep an open mind and give him a chance to make it up to you.”

  “Suits him, doesn’t it?” Luke said, standing back to admire the gleaming bicycle. “I hope you have fun with it...son.” The word came out awkwardly “Right!” he announced in a loud, jovial voice. “Better get it back to the truck. You can’t sit in the back with it, though, you know.”

  Kat cringed at his clumsy attempt at humor. Luke had done wrong by his son, no doubt about that, but he was trying so hard. Catching Ben’s eye, she gave him what she hoped was a pleading look.

  “Thanks,” he mumbled, glancing up at Luke. “For the bike and stuff.”

  “That’s okay,” Luke responded, pleased. “The ‘stuff’ hasn’t come yet, though.”

  She gave Ben a little nod to show her appreciation, and when his lips curved ever so slightly in response, she swore to herself that she would go and talk to Mollie Jackson as soon as possible.

  On the way home, Ben kept turning to peer out the back window of the pickup to make sure that the bike was safe. Kat and Luke exchanged an amused glance. All in all, it had been a satisfying day. In fact, she didn’t want it to end just yet.

  Leaving the gray stone buildings of Kendal behind, Luke drove back toward Flight, but when they reached the coast he headed in the opposite direction. Kat was about to ask where they were going, but decided to go with the flow instead; it was kind of exciting, like a mystery tour. Still staring at his new bike through the back window, Ben didn’t even notice in what direction they were traveling.

  They drove in silence for a couple of miles along the coast, breathing in the fresh sea air through the open windows, taking in the amazing views. “It really is lovely here, isn’t it?” Kat said with a satisfied sigh.

  Luke nodded, glancing sideways at her before looking back at the road. “Nowhere better,” he agreed, then made a hard left. Ahead of them was a large empty parking lot right next to a wide expanse of beach; he pulled in and cut the engine. “How about some practice time and some lunch? Maybe even a little splash if you’d like.”

  “What...here?” Ben asked as they all got out of the pickup.

  “Why not?” Luke carefully lifted the bike from the back of the truck. “There’s plenty of space, no people, and it’s nice and smooth for cycling.”

  “It’s beautiful here,” Kat said. “But why is such a nice place so empty?”

  Luke shrugged. “It never seems to get busy here, unless there’s a school holiday. I suppose it’s a bit off the beaten track.”

  Kat nodded. “You mentioned lunch, but I can’t see a café anywhere near.”

  “Who needs a café or a fancy restaurant,” Luke announced, lifting a box out of the back of the pickup, “when we have lunch right here.”

  “But aren’t they expecting Ben back at Flight?” Kat asked.

  Luke grinned. “I squared it with Mike. He said I could take Ben out for the day.”

  “Hey, Ben,” Kat called. He was already riding his bike around in circles. “Guess what—we’re having a picnic!”

  As Ben rode toward them, the expression on his face said it all.

  “You can have half an hour’s practice before we eat,” Luke told him, then pulled out two plaid blankets. He spread them out beneath a stunted tree on a grassy bank between the parking area and the shore and urged Kat to sit. For a moment, she held back and he frowned. “I don’t bite...honestly. Okay, so sometimes I get a bit worked up, but I have my reasons. And you’re not always so easy to get along with yourself.”

  Kat sank down beside him, smiling. “Thanks, Luke. For today, it’s just lovely to see Ben so happy for once.”

  “You look happy, too,” he told her.

  She nodded, meeting his gaze. “Seeing Ben this way makes me feel happy. I love it when children start to heal.”

  “And you think he’s healing?”

  “I know he is,” she said, feeling a glow inside her at the hope on Luke’s face. “I realize I said I didn’t think bribery was the right approach, but getting him the bike was obviously a good idea. You do have a lot of making up to do, after all.”

&n
bsp; “Nine years,” Luke said. “I have no idea if he’ll ever totally forgive my neglect or even come to care about me, for that matter, but I have a duty to him...”

  “Duty?” Kat’s eyes narrowed. “Is that how you think of it? What about love?”

  Luke leaned forward, an earnest expression on his face. “Of course I love Ben—he’s my son. Look, Kat, I am trying, but I don’t even know Ben yet—not really. I want to do the right thing and help him grow up into a well-adjusted, decent human being, but to be honest, I’m floundering a bit. All I know is that he needs discipline. It’s how I was brought up, you see, to follow the rules set by my dad. Rules are what make you a better man, he always used to say. Following them defines who you are.”

  “And you believed him?”

  “Well...yes, I guess.”

  Kat put a hand on his arm. “Don’t get me wrong—rules and discipline are important, but they aren’t everything. Try to be his friend as well—talk to him.”

  Luke held her gaze. “For what it’s worth,” he said, “I think you were right about the bike. I offered to buy it on a bit of a whim and then I regretted it because spoiling him isn’t the answer.”

  “One bike in nine years is hardly spoiling him,” Kat pointed out.

  “It’s not just me, though. He’s been spoiled all his life and I need him to get past that. That’s what his behavior is all about.”

  “How do you know? How do you truly know what his life has been like up to now? If he was spoiled, Flight will help him outgrow it. You need to let him learn to love you back, Luke.”

  Their faces were so close that Kat could feel his breath on her cheek. “That’s just it,” he murmured, his eyes soft with a vulnerability she’d never seen before. “What if he never forgives me and never grows to love me? Perhaps I’ve already lost my chance with him.”

  On impulse, Kat moved closer. Cupping his jaw with gentle fingers, she touched her lips to his, and when his arms closed around her it felt so right. He smelled fresh, like pine, with a spicy undertone; she breathed in his aroma, drawing it deep into her lungs, wanting...needing more. And when his lips closed over hers, so soft and yet fiercely demanding, for an endless moment it felt as if they were one being, a part of the vast space and beauty that surrounded them...

  But they weren’t alone. With a surge of guilt, Kat pulled away in panic, looking for Ben. What were they thinking?

  To her relief, he was still riding happily around in large circles, totally focused on controlling his bike.

  “Sorry,” Luke said, reaching out to tuck a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “Bad timing.”

  Kat jumped back as if she’d been stung. “Bad timing? Don’t you mean completely inappropriate?”

  “Actually...no,” he said, smiling. “I’m taking that sorry back. It was bad timing, but I’m definitely not sorry. In fact, I’d like to do it again.”

  “No, Luke. We can’t. Ben has enough to deal with. The two of us together...would just complicate matters.”

  Luke frowned. “I guess you’re right. I can’t regret it, though. I don’t know what you do to me, Kat. Our relationship is...”

  “Hot and cold?” she suggested.

  “Something like that,” he agreed, his brown eyes sparkling. “It was just the timing that was inappropriate, though, not the kiss.”

  When he reached out one finger to stroke her cheek her whole body trembled. “Ben is the one we have to focus on,” she said, pulling reluctantly away. “We can’t do this... It’s not right. He’s got enough problems as it is.”

  “Okay, point taken,” he agreed, jumping up. “Now, how about this picnic? Why don’t you set it out and I’ll go and see how Ben’s doing.”

  Kat watched him walk off across the sand, his brown boots leaving deep footprints; he walked so confidently, so tall and straight and true. The vulnerability he’d revealed had been real, though, she was sure of that, and he did seem to be genuinely trying to build bridges with Ben, even though his priorities were slightly off.

  But from a romantic perspective, Luke had to be off-limits. Any kind of relationship between them could compromise her position at Flight and hurt her reputation. How could she have acted on that sudden whim?

  It was a risk she wouldn’t take again.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  BEN HAD GOTTEN up especially early that morning to go and polish his bike.

  A rush of pride overcame him as he gazed at the gleaming metal one last time before he went for breakfast; until he came to Flight, he’d always had a bike of his own, but never one so big and shiny.

  He spotted Luke as he came out of the bike shed and froze. Yesterday had been a good day, even though he knew Luke was trying to buy his friendship to make himself feel better. If he truly cared about him, he never would have left in the first place. Ben had overheard his granddad and grandma talking about how selfish his dad was and how he was better off without him.

  That was ages ago, though, before his mum died and everything had started to go wrong. Maybe if Luke had been around, things would have stayed good and Granddad wouldn’t have gone weird.

  To Ben’s dismay, Luke saw him and stopped walking, shading his eyes from the bright morning sunshine. “Morning,” he called.

  Ben wanted to shout “morning!” back, to smile and walk beside him, but fear held him back. Luke might have seemed nice yesterday, but had he meant it? Or would he leave, too, once he got bored?

  What if...what if...what if?

  “Checking on your bike?” Luke asked.

  Ben tried to smile, he did, but words just didn’t seem to want to come out of his mouth. In the end, he just nodded.

  Luke took a few steps toward him and Ben wanted to run off. He didn’t know what to say to the stranger who was his dad; everything was so strange.

  “I hope you still like it...” Luke said.

  Wishing Miss was there, Ben shrugged. “Guess so,” he said. Miss helped him because that was what she did—she helped messed-up kids. He knew he was messed up because he’d heard the social workers talking about it when they didn’t know he was there. He was good at hiding and he knew lots of things from listening.

  Ben hoped Luke would just go away, but he didn’t.

  “We had a good time, though...didn’t we?” Luke insisted. “Yesterday, I mean, going for the bike and the picnic?”

  Ben shrugged again, feeling awkward and unsure. “I’ve got to go now,” he said.

  Luke’s face tightened and Ben could see that he was getting cross. “I bought you a bike to try and make it up to you, show you that I cared,” he said. “But obviously it was a waste of time because you don’t even seem to appreciate it.”

  His cross voice made Ben feel angry, too; he felt angry a lot nowadays. “I don’t have to talk to you just because you bought me a bike,” he announced defiantly, glaring at Luke.

  “No, you don’t,” Luke agreed. “But you do need to be polite. All children should learn to be polite and respectful—surely your grandparents taught you that, at least.”

  The mention of his grandparents pushed him over the edge. He missed how they used to be so badly, and he wanted to see his granddad. “I hate it here,” he yelled. “I want to go home!”

  He was about to run away, but Luke grabbed his arm. Ben didn’t fight him, even though he wanted to; he just looked at the ground.

  “Look, Ben,” Luke said. “Despite what you might think of me, I really do want us to be friends. I am your dad, and I know I’ve let you down, but I want to try and make up for that...if you’ll let me.”

  Ben looked up at him. He wanted to have a dad and he wanted to trust Luke, but he’d already gone away once. If even Ben’s granddad, who had promised never to leave him, could go...what would stop Luke? “It’s too late,” he said.

&nb
sp; Luke’s face went very pale and he let go of Ben’s arm. He walked away without looking back, and Ben was glad Luke couldn’t see the tears that rolled down his cheeks. He needed a friend, but what if...what if...what if?

  * * *

  KAT WALKED EAGERLY toward the wooden shed at the end of Cove Road. Excitement fluttered inside her. Last night she had phoned Elsa to ask her about the possibility of renting it, and the result couldn’t have been better. Elsa had told her that she’d once used it as a shop, selling items from the sea: shells, interesting pieces of driftwood and other items that she’d sourced elsewhere. She’d told Kat she could use it for free if she tidied it up after Kat explained her unique twist on child therapy.

  “And if there’s any merchandise left in there, you may as well have it for the sea-therapy course you were telling me about,” Elsa had offered.

  There was even a key for the shed hanging in the cottage, and today Kat was going to open it up and take a look inside.

  The key felt stiff in the lock, but after a bit of effort, it turned and the door clicked open. Inside was a faint, musty smell and clouds of dust floated up when she started to poke around on the shelves, but she could see that all it needed was a good clean. Just as Elsa had suggested, a number of items had been left behind: unusual shells, sea-horse-shaped charms, a bracelet made up of silver fish all linked together and weird pieces of driftwood, some of them huge. Kat placed some of the smaller trinkets in a tote bag to take home and clean. If she was to use the place to house animals, it had to be suitable for them.

  The front of the shed, where the shelves were, could be left as it was. She’d let the children put the treasures they’d found on the shore there, as a proper sea collection. The other side of the shed was wide-open, a nice big space where she could put cages and make pens. Her animal-therapy course might finally get off the ground, she realized with a surge of anticipation...though she still had to get Mike’s final approval.

  Still, he’d said she could start with a few animals, and once she had the place spick-and-span she’d do a risk assessment to persuade Mike to sign off on bringing the children to visit.