Rising Tides

by Maria Rachel Hooley

  “Yeah,” I said, kissing his chin. “I love you, too.”

  In the background, Jamie was looking over the plane. “Would you like me to put her up?” he asked.

  Tyler nodded. “That would be great, Jamie. Thanks.”

  As we started walking toward the car, Tyler’s arm draped around me, drawing me close. “Those dolphins were incredible,” I said.

  He nodded and laughed. “Yeah. They are, aren’t they?”

  “When did you see them for the first time?” I asked, looking up at him.

  Tyler’s arm drew tighter around me, and I could feel his body stiffen. For a moment, he was quiet but then finally said, “Last year, right after my sister’s funeral.” He leaned over and kissed my forehead. “I was trying to make sense of things. You know, the why-take-her-instead-of-me, sort of feelings. I was angry and alone. She had been my best friend, and now she was gone.”

  I looked up and saw that his eyes were closed, his mouth twisted into a painful frown. “I know you must have loved her a lot.”

  “Yeah,” he managed. “I missed her. “And then I saw them.” He shrugged. “I don’t know. It was like Alicia was trying to tell me something, like ‘don’t be a martyr. You’re missing this, and it’s too important to miss.’”

  Tyler stopped stepped in front of me. He reached out and touched my chin. “That’s why I had to show you. I never had the chance to share this with Alicia, and it’s too important for you to miss now. Nobody else can see it for you.”

  I stared into his eyes, feeling the sorrow pooled there as though he had taken it from the larger pool within me. He knew how I felt. He knew what course my life ran. And he was trying to help me make some sense of it.

  I touched the tears, not to wipe them away but just to feel them, to recognize them as part of me. Then I smiled and said, “Thank you for completing me.”

  He pulled me to his chest. “We’ve completed each other. Since that first day on the beach, we were bound to each other—somehow Somehow, some way. I felt it then, and every day since, it’s only grown.”

  I laid my heat against him and listened. Seconds later, I heard the sound his heart made and felt the pulse of it run through my body as though it had merged with mine.

  Chapter Eleven

  As Tyler drove home from the airport, I leaned on his shoulder and closed my eyes, feeling the fatigue wrap tightly around me. I wanted to fight it because I knew it was just another symptom that grew every day. The blackness pushed me deeper until a dream surfaced from the darkness into a blue ocean lullaby. Above, I could see sunlight streaming down, the rays touching a school of fish as it swam close to the surface.

  I thrust my arms out in front of me and propelled myself through the cool water. My hair shimmered around me like strands of dark silk, billowing with each rippling movement. I looked to the ocean floor strewn with anemones, shells, and other beautiful things.

  Fingers touched my shoulders, gently massaging the muscles right around my neck. I turned and saw Tyler hovering above me. The sand dollar floated around his neck, dangling toward me. The sunlight spilled around him, turning his skin a deeper gold. My eyes met his and saw the deep blue stirring there, open and unblinking. His hand reached out and brushed under my chin, drawing my mouth to his. I felt his lips against mine, and then the air that he blew into my mouth. He was breathing for me. The panic suddenly seized me as I realized I was drowning. I started to struggle.

  Tyler grabbed me, pressed me against his body, swimming to the surface.

  Blackness.

  “Kelly?” Tyler said. His voice sounded hazy and distant. A hand touched my forehead, peeling more of the sluggish dream away. I opened my eyes to find him leaning over me as I lay on the passenger seat. He slid his arms underneath me and gently picked me up.

  “I can walk,” I protested, despite the fatigue and the desire to remain lying against him.

  Tyler kissed my forehead. “I know you can, love. I just like the way you feel. You’re soft and light, like a feather.” He dipped his head and brushed his nose against mine.

  He shut the door with his foot and carried me inside the house to our bedroom, where he gently laid me on the bed. As I lay against the pillow, he stared at my face and brushed a strand of hair from my eyes. He leaned over my feet and pulled my shoes off, setting them both on the floor. Then he sat and took off his own shoes and shirt before stretching out beside me. I rolled to my side and he molded himself against me.

  “I knew you’d want to fly,” he said as he pulled the rubber band from my hair and slowly unwound my long braid, running his fingers through the strands as he freed them. “I knew you’d want it just as badly I as once did.”

  “That made one of us. For a while, I was tempted to bolt in the other direction.” I closed my eyes and savored the feel of his fingers gently working through my hair. Because the windows were open, I heard the tide crashing to shore in wild abandon, the water caressing the sand.

  Tyler chuckled. “Yeah, but you wouldn’t have. Even if I hadn’t picked you up, you would have stayed. You’d have done it just to see what it was like. To remember.” He kissed the top of my head, and his hand rested on my shoulder. His body was pressed against me. I could feel the heat of his skin. In every curve, every line, nothing was concealed from me, not even the clothing hid the geography of our bodies and the way they fit together.

  Tyler brushed his lips across my neck. His fingers traveled my body, re-exploring each region he now knew so intimately. We had made love so many times, but each one had remained distinct. I closed my eyes and surrendered to his touch, listening to the ocean washing the world outside and the smelling the salt air, feeling the warmth of Tyler’s skin.

  Piece by piece, he removed my clothing just the way he had removed the pain, and then he covered his body with mine, joining us again. For always. With anyone else, I would have wanted to hide my body. I would have been ashamed of the way it looked because I’d lost so much weight. But not with Tyler. Never with Tyler.

  Afterwards, we lay together and watched the sunlight seep across the room and dwindle as dusk approached, spilling the sherbet and pink radiance into the room. I rested my head on his chest, listening to the thunder of his heart, and my fingers brushed through the dark ringlets on his chest.

  “I could stay like this forever,” I said.

  “Me, too,” he replied, drawing his arms around me more securely. “When I’m around you, I tend to forget other parts of the world. It’s like they are unimportant until you’re in them. You make them feel like pieces of heaven.”

  I thought of the dolphins and what had caused Tyler to see them out--Alicia’s death. “What happened to your sister?” I asked softly.

  Tyler stiffened, and he closed his eyes as though that would keep him from having this conversation. “A car accident.”

  My fingers paused in touching his chest as I thought about the sudden impact her death had left upon him. He hadn’t had time to prepare for that loss, hadn’t seen it coming until it arrived. So which was worse, knowing or not? “I bet she was great,” I said. “She had to have been.”

  Tyler sat up, and I pulled away. “Why?” he asked, wearing a puzzled frown.

  I touched his chin. “Because she was related to you, Tyler, and I know how incredible you are.”

  Tyler flushed and got up. His back appeared uncomfortably rigid, and he reached for his jeans, tugging them on. “So how about I make us an incredible dinner?” he asked in a tone that delayed further discussion. He pulled his shirt on but left it unbuttoned and untucked.

  I started to get up. “Okay, I’ll help.”

  He held up his hand and said, “No, thanks. I’ll perform this miracle on my own, thank you.”

  I rolled my eyes unappreciatively. “Oh, great. I’ve been banned from the kitchen.”

  He headed for the door and looked back, wearing an irksome grin. “I’ve seen you in the kitchen, Kelly. It’s not a pretty sight.”

  I
moved to the edge of the bed and reached for my clothes. “Well, be that way. I’ll just take a walk on the beach.”

  He rolled his shoulders in exaggerated relief. “Yeah, we’ll both be safer.”

  I picked up a pillow and tossed it at him, but it missed easily without Tyler even having to duck. He laughed and folded his arms across his chest. “We’re going to have to work on your aim as well as your cooking.”

  “Don’t you have a dinner to fix?” I asked, dressing myself.

  He walked back, bent, and kissed me. “Yeah. I do. Have fun on the beach, and take Larkin with you. He’s become your dog more than mine, anyway.”

  “Smart dog,” I muttered, watching his backside retreat down the hallway toward the kitchen.

  Moments later I walked through the house, toward the sliding glass door. As I left, I felt Tyler’s gaze lingering on me. The heavy weight of it forced me to look at him and see the neutral expression set in the line of his lips and slightly squinted eyes. His hands held a green pepper and a knife, but they had suddenly frozen to stillness in my passing. He had buttoned his shirt but left it untucked, and for a few seconds he appeared vulnerable, almost childlike, as he stood there.

  “Tyler?” I asked. “What’s wrong?”

  He parted his lips as though to say something or to take a deep breath, but then in silence twisted them up in an unfelt grin. “Nothing, Kelly. Go take your walk.”

  I switched my course from the door to embracing his chest. At first, his arms just remained where they were as though he were in shock to find me there. Then he set the pepper and knife down and clutched me tightly to him. “Are you okay?” I asked.

  “I am now,” he finally admitted, burying his face in my neck. “With you, I’ll always be all right.” His deep voice thickened, filling the gaps within itself with tears, and I could feel his chest tightened to unbearable stiffness. “I don’t know why we had to wait so long to find each other, Kelly. I want to take everything I’ve ever felt and pour it into you because I know somebody I love that much and somebody who’s lived that much shouldn’t die.”

  I shivered, not from fear but from the thought of being separated from Tyler. I pulled back and saw the tears spilling down his face, and right then I loved him for not being afraid of being weak. Gary had never asked me to be strong for him, even thought I had needed it. I reached up and touched his pain, wiping my fingers in the stain of his tears. “I’m not going to die, Tyler. Not completely. The only way someone ever keeps on living is by being loved, and I know you love me. I’ve always known that.” I stood on my tiptoes and kissed his mouth softly while cupping his face in both hands. I have known the power of life because of you.

  He blinked once and smiled slowly like the sun emerging from behind a thick wall of clouds. “You’ve given me peace. That’s something I never had after Alicia’s death, something I thought I’d never have again.”

  You are my peace, I thought, embracing him one last time. His body softened at my touch, and I knew the storm within him had subsided for now. The waters where we swam had stilled for the moment. I pulled back and pointed at the pepper and knife. “You’re slacking off.”

  He raised his hand to his forehead and saluted me. “Yes, ma’am. Dinner’s on its way.”

  “And so am I,” I responded, opening the door and stepped outside.

  Larkin met me at the bottom step and jumped on me. I patted his head and started to run. “Come on, boy. Let’s leave some tracks behind.”

  As I streaked across the beach, carefully avoiding the people who lay on blankets sunbathing, Larkin dashed behind me, darting in and out of the water. After a few minutes of running, we came to a section of the beach where the crowds had thinned considerably, probably because of all the rocks on the shore. Scanning the area, I found a big one and sat. Larkin circled me three times before darting farther down the beach, exploring.

  I looked out into the wild waves and listened to the surf washing to shore. For a second, I closed my eyes, and that dream came back to me, the one where I had been drowning. At first, it had seemed so peaceful, like I was swimming. I had not panicked, not until Tyler had pressed his mouth to mine and given me air. Then I had panicked.

  I opened my eyes and shrugged the weight of it from my mind, then I thought about the angle of the ocean as I’d seen it from the plane. As if reading my thoughts, the wind picked up, reminding me of what it had felt like when I was riding the sky. Magic.

  I stood and walked out toward the water. As my bare feet touched the wet sand and surf, I felt a little cold, but the water was much warmer than when I’d first met Tyler. That alone left me a little colder inside. I was losing time. With every day, the tides inside my body dragged more of me down, erasing the future as the ocean erased the past, and I couldn’t stop it.

  I kicked at the water and watched droplets spray into the air before rejoining the tide. Larkin came up behind me and jumped against the back of my legs. Surprised, I lost my balance and fell forward, straight into the water. Luckily the place I landed was soft sand instead of rocks. My face dipped into the ocean, and I came up sputtering.

  Larkin stood a safe distance away and barked out his concern for me. Standing, I threw my unbraided hair over my shoulder and stepped toward him. Sensing my frustration, Larkin darted backward and barked more loudly.

  “You’re in league with Tyler, aren’t you?” I asked, pointing a finger at him menacingly. “He put you up to that, didn’t he?”

  Larkin cocked his head innocently and turned, trotting back to the house.

  Another gust of air blew, chilling me, more from my wet clothes than anything else. I trudged back to the house and, as I entered, Tyler stopped setting plates on the table and took a good look at me, starting with my drenched hair and ending with my sandy feet. He set the last plate down and placed his hands on his hips. His eyebrows lowered over his slightly squinted eyes, and he started laughing as I trudged toward the bedroom to change.

  “Should I not ask?” he called to me.

  “Not if you enjoy breathing,” I replied, pulling off my wet clothes and heading for the shower.

  * * *

  “How about a little swim, Kelly?” Tyler asked as we loaded the last of the dinner dishes into the dishwasher.

  I closed the door and started it. “Tonight?”

  “Yep.” He leaned against the counter and took a sip of iced tea.

  I walked to the sliding glass door and peered out. Moonlight spilled down, glistening black onyx on the rolling waves. I touched the glass, pressing one palm against it and heard the ice in Tyler’s glass rattle as he set it on the counter. A moment later, I felt his hands softly massaging my neck. “A swim?” I repeated, remembering the way the warmth of the day had burned through me.

  “Yeah,” he said, kissing my neck. “Unless you’re afraid of sea monsters or something.”

  “Only those with the initial ‘T.’” I relaxed as his fingers softly loosened the knotted muscles.

  “Are you insinuating something, love?” he asked, his breath gently caressing my skin.

  I leaned against him and closed my eyes, focusing on his warm breath breezing against me, savoring the pattern his fingers lazily traced on my skin. “Whatever it was, I don’t think it was important,” I muttered, closing my eyes.

  “How about that swim?” he asked, prompting me from paradise.

  “You don’t give up, do you?” I asked, opening my eyes and turning toward him. I draped my arms around his neck.

  “Not when it counts, Kelly.”

  I cocked my head to the side as though considering his proposal. “So you want to go for a swim,” I repeated.

  “Uh huh.”

  I moved my arms from around his neck and slid the door open. “Grab two towels,” I said, walking outside. I glanced up and down the beach and found it empty except for Larkin, who chased the waves, barking.

  “Kelly?”

  “Yeah?” I turned find Tyler grinning wickedly at me.
He arched his eyebrows and crossed his arms over his chest.

  “Swim suits?”

  “Live a little, Tyler,” I taunted, racing toward the stairs. “Unless you’re afraid some mermaid’s going to attack you.”

  Tyler leaned out the door and laughed. “Not unless her initials are KJ.”

  I stopped and pulled my shirt over my head. “Are you implying something, Tyler?” Silence. I looked up to find the laughter had left and pure heat radiated from his uncomfortable posture as he stared at my half-nude body. “Tyler?”

  He took a deep breath and said in a soft voice, “Hell if I know. It wasn’t important.”

  I shimmied out of my shorts and tossed them at him. “Good. Get some towels.”

  I didn’t wait for his response. Instead, I streaked toward the water, and the moment Larkin saw me coming, he darted around me. I wagged a warning finger at him and said, “Not this time, mutt. I’m going for a swim without your help.” I scurried into the water.

  “Talking to dogs now?” Tyler called from his deck. He had peeled off his shirt and was in the process of removing his denim cut-offs as he spoke.

  “Yeah,” I said. “But he doesn’t talk back.”

  Tyler walked down the steps, his naked body illuminated in the full moonlight. The lines and shadows of starlight accentuated his chest and arms, and for just a moment I was lost in the perfection of his body, knowing the strength and love that it held. I had felt both time and again. Each moment blurred together until it seemed impossible that I hadn’t known him my whole life. He was my soul-mate. He was my life. He was my forever.

  “Kelly?” Tyler asked. His hand, the one holding the towels, quickly unfolded one and let it slip down, concealing him from his waist to his knees. “What are you looking at?” Even in the moonlight, I could see his face darken in a heated flush.

  “You,” I replied, laughing while leaning forward to get a better look at his expression. “Tyler, are you embarrassed? For someone who isn’t afraid to fly hulls and airplanes, this is too incredible. I’ve embarrassed you.”