Hard Rock Hot Heart

by Laura Anne Turner

  Hard Rock Hot Heart

  Laura Anne Turner

  © 2019 Laura Anne Turner

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.

  This book is a work of fiction. All characters, places and incidents are the products of the author´s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. The author does not own any rights to the band names, songs, songs titles, or song lyrics quoted in this book. No copyright violation intended. It is all for the love of music.

  Cover Design by Laura Anne Turner

  Cover Photo: © www.123rf.com

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

  I don’t have the words to thank my dearest friend ‘Engelchen’. Without you this book wouldn’t be the same. I’d like to say thank you not only for helping me with colloquial English, but also for your creative input that greatly helped to make this book better.

  I’d also like to say thank you to my favorite bands The Pretty Reckless, Halestorm, Evanescence, Pink Floyd, to name just a few, and also many other bands, whose music has kept me alive and helped me during the many hours of working on this book.

  Last but not least I’d like to thank my wife Sonja for her love and patience while I was hiding in my room in front of my computer and writing this work.

  CONTENTS

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

  CHAPTER 1 – NEW YEAR’S EVE GIG

  CHAPTER 2 – JENNIFER COLDHEART

  CHAPTER 3 – COCK ROCKERS AND CRAZY BITCHES

  CHAPTER 4 – EVEN GODDESSES NEED ADVICE SOMETIMES

  CHAPTER 5 – A ROMANTIC AND TOTALLY CRAZY DATE

  CHAPTER 6 – A WILD SUMMER

  ABOUT THIS BOOK AND ITS AUTHOR

  SAMPLE FROM JENNIFER’S CRUSH

  SAMPLE FROM JENNIFER’S TRIAD

  CHAPTER 1 – NEW YEAR’S EVE GIG

  Somehow I couldn’t even begin to understand why having spent just one glorious night with that crazy little Taylor Momsen lookalike should have caused such a huge trip down memory lane. Hadn’t a certain part of me felt anything but relief? Hadn’t I felt relief that she didn’t behave like a bitch and had just left without drama? Hadn’t I felt relief that I didn’t have her phone number or her address, so that seeing her again was highly unlikely? Didn’t that mean I’d not have to waste a single thought about the idea of a romantic relationship with her?

  ‘You’re such an idiot!’ screamed a major part of me. ‘You cannot simply go back and pretend as if nothing happened!’

  Huh? Where did that come from? I sighed. Had I made a huge mistake in letting Tanja go? That couldn’t be true, could it? I didn’t want the heartache. Never again!

  Unwantedly Tanja’s image appeared before my mind’s eye. How she showed up in the kitchen this morning, looking beautiful and innocent like an angel. How she sat down on my lap, watching Jenny and Nellie. It was weird, but I felt something that I could only define as yearning. Yes, it was a yearning for Tanja and the wish of seeing her again.

  I moaned loudly. Had I really made a huge mistake? I couldn’t go on like I used to. How many young women and girls had I hurt with my selfish actions? I had even broken their hearts and hurt their souls. Exactly those things I didn’t want to feel myself.

  I turned around in my comfy bed and tried to get some sleep, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t simply turn off the thoughts that filled my head. Sighing again, I lay on my back and continued this weird trip down memory lane.

  Eight months earlier

  A new year was coming. In the two years since the release of our self-titled album ‘The Coldhearts’, we’d established ourselves as one of the biggest local bands, and easily the most notorious. We were everyone’s wet dream of what lesbians ought to be, too, and rumors and reports about Ina’s and my sexual exploits that spread online and offline didn’t discourage that. This led to more people wanting to see us live on stage, even if only to have a look at those scandalous girls or to shower hatred and abuse on us. In fact that did happen, too. Homophobes, bigots, and sexist machos left their abusive posts on social media.

  We’d improved our musical skills and our capabilities as composers even more, and the chemistry within the band still kept growing. At least I thought so. A dramatic error as should soon turn out. We’d worked hard as a band, playing as many gigs as our day jobs and Nellie’s study would allow. Of course, playing in front of crowds of crazily enthusiastic fans wasn’t exactly what many people would describe as ‘hard work’. In fact it was so much more than that. Besides many, many hours of rehearsals and preparing for our gigs, we’d worked hard in promoting ourselves on social media using them to build our fan base and stay connected to our Crazy Bitches who promoted us with enthusiasm, too.

  As far as the band was concerned I was happy, mostly, at least. But I sometimes felt that there was a dark place deep inside me, and that sometimes darkness welled up from inside it and left me brooding and withdrawn. I’d built a wall around my heart, and I’d discovered that if l lost myself in work, or music, or alcohol, or sex, it was easier to cope with the emptiness inside me.

  That New Year’s Eve I was working on forgetting those feelings again. We were the headliners at the biggest local New Year’s Eve party, which was being held in a huge local auditorium. The line-up for this remarkable event consisted of us and four other bands, and the event manager wanted each of us to play two sets, one before and one after midnight. As the band at the top of the bill we had the slots immediately before and after the start of the New Year. This meant we might be able to get home early enough for partying, provided we wanted to do that.

  I wore an old outfit for the gig, which consisted of a skimpy pair of black leather hot pants with black fishnet stockings, knee-high boots, and a blood-red tank top with the ‘Coldhearts’ logo in black. It suited me, and also our Crazy Bitches all seemed to like it, but I’d gotten a little tired of it, somehow, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to go on wearing it in the New Year. I did change my hairstyle, though, wearing my long blonde hair in a tight French braid that kept it out of my face and made me look like a Valkyrie, although I wasn’t that tall, but it would make me look more impressive onstage.

  We’d made sound and light check in the afternoon, so we could take our time. When we arrived at the backstage area, I was kneeling down to lean my guitar case against the wall, when I noticed two girls holding hands. One of them was a very pretty redhead with startling blue eyes, who I recognized as the lead singer of a symphonic metal band that was scheduled to play before us. The other was a ravishingly beautiful girl with very long, jet-black hair, and amazing green eyes.

  Fuck me, Jesus! I thought. Those two girls are so hot I’d like to have them in my bed, preferably at the same time! I had no idea if that was possible, but I had to find out, didn’t I? So, I got up and left my Flying-V alone for a moment. I walked over to the two adorable lovebirds.

  The two of them saw me coming. They looked startled as though they not only knew very well who I was, but also all about my reputation as a notorious seductress of girls. Wide-eyed, they watched every move I made as I walked over to them, swaying slightly on my high-heeled boots. I had to bite my bottom lip to keep from laughing out loud. They looked so cute and innocent, and everything around them screamed baby dykes, so I thought that their coming out hadn’t been too long ago.

  When I was standing before them, I smiled and offered them my hand. “Hello, Lovebirds! I’m Bette Coldheart,” I said, “and you are…?”

  While the black-ha
ired girl stared at me as if she’d seen a ghost, the redhead gave me a nervous grin, grabbed my hand and shook it.

  “Oh hi, Bette, I’m Emilia,” the beautiful redhead said, “and this is Jenny. Nice to meet you.”

  I smiled back at her. Her long red hair nicely framed her pale face, and she had adorable freckles on her nose and cheeks. “Good to meet you, Emilia. And you, too, Jenny,” I said, turning to the stunning black-haired girl, and shaking her hand. Jenny seemed to be genuinely scared of me or something, but she couldn’t keep her beautiful green eyes off me. I squatted in front of them, admiring their beauty.

  “You two are a really cute couple,” I said. Turning back to Emilia, I cocked one eyebrow and asked, “You are a couple, aren’t you?”

  Emilia nodded emphatically, holding on tight to Jenny’s hand. “Yes, Jenny and I are a couple.” She kept smiling at me, but she looked at me as though she was afraid I might throw her girlfriend over my shoulder, carry her away, and ravish her. Jenny herself was still staring at me wide-eyed, as if she had seen a ghost.

  “That’s wonderful,” I replied, smiling broadly. “You look so beautiful together, too, you with your red hair, Emilia, and you with your black hair, Jenny.” I reached out and touched Jenny’s thick hair, and took hold of a strand of Emilia’s wavy red hair at the same time. An image popped up in my mind of the two of them lying together naked, their hair pooled around them, mingled. It was quite an enticing picture.

  I could see that I wasn’t going to get anywhere with the two of them immediately, and I didn’t want to scare them more than I had already. Shaking my head and smiling sweetly, I said, “You girls are just so beautiful together. I’ve just got to watch your performance, and I’ll tell my band bitches to watch you, too.” I grinned at them mischievously. “See you later, Lovebirds.”

  I got up, turned around, and began walking away. Then I turned to them once more, winking at them over my shoulder and blowing them a kiss. They looked startled. Smiling smugly, I strode back to my bandmates, swinging my hips, thus giving the two girls a good look at my ass.

  Ina, Caro, and Nellie were chatting excitedly among themselves when I rejoined them. “Hey, My Crazy Bitches,” I said, nodding to where Emilia and Jenny were sitting. “Check out those two rocker chicks.”

  My bandmates stopped talking and looked up, all of them turning their heads in the direction of Jenny and Emilia. They clearly liked what they saw, but to my surprise Nellie was the first to say anything. “Whoa,” she gasped, her eyes wide. “The girl with the black hair is gorgeous.”

  I smirked at Nellie, while Ina and Caro giggled. Nellie glanced at us and blushed. We watched as Emilia and Jenny shared a tender kiss, before the girl with the jet-black hair picked up her bass guitar, and headed for the stage along with her male bandmates. Emilia stayed behind for the moment, apparently waiting for her cue to make her own entrance while her band played their instrumental intro.

  Suddenly I had an idea. “C’mon, girls,” I said to my bandmates, “I want to have a word with that redhead before she goes on stage.” Bemused and not knowing what I was up to, they followed me over to where Emilia was standing. She was watching her bandmates, able to see the whole stage without being seen by the audience, hidden as she was by a curtain.

  The pretty redhead glanced at us as we approached, looking a little startled. Walking up behind her, grinning, and looking down at her tight ass, which her leather pants showed off incredibly well, I leaned in and said into her ear, “Listen, Emilia, before you go onstage, you need something to get your adrenaline going a bit more, and I know just how to do that.” Then I slapped her ass, hard.

  She let out a high-pitched squeal, which of course neither her band nor the crowd could hear. Emilia gave me a look of shocked disbelief. I met her eyes and grinned fiercely. “Now, Emilia, stand up straight, and go out there with your head held high like you’re a fucking rock queen.”

  She shook her head breathlessly, and then she grinned back at me, and did exactly what I’d told her to do. Arriving at the microphone stand at center stage, she looked out over the crowd and smiled at them regally, and nodded. When she began to sing I realized that Emilia’s soprano voice was as beautiful as she was. I smiled and decided I liked her even more than I did already.

  While Emilia was hot, jet-black Jenny was even hotter than her girlfriend. She seemed to lose most of her shyness once she’d gotten onstage and she could concentrate on playing her bass, which she absolutely knew how to do. Occasionally she’d shoot a glance in our direction, and whenever she did, we all waved to her and blew her kisses. That made her smile, and her smile was absolutely amazing. I glanced at my band mates, and I saw that I wasn’t the only one who was devouring the voluptuous raven-haired beauty with her eyes. Nellie couldn’t take her eyes off of the black-haired rocker girl.

  Seeing us watching her so intently, made Jenny decide to put on a bit of a show for us. She stalked toward us, smiling seductively and shaking her hips lasciviously. Nellie started giggling, and the rest of us burst out laughing. We all began shaking our hips, too, blowing more kisses to Jenny as we did.

  While I had fun watching the show Jenny put on for us, I watched her band more critically. They were not bad, but they weren’t nearly as good as we were, since the three guys on guitar, keyboards, and drums by far hadn’t achieved our professional standard yet. Jenny however was another story: she was every bit as good as Caro was. The crowd wasn’t as critical as I was, though. They thoroughly enjoyed their symphonic metal and insisted on getting an encore from them. I could see that Emilia and Jenny were thrilled. I suspected it was because they weren’t used to crowds liking them as much as that. Maybe they’d put on a better than usual performance?

  At any rate, I was happy for them. After Emilia, Jenny, and the guys finished their first set and came offstage, we gave all of them high fives. Of course I made sure to have a quick word with Jenny. Smiling and handing the gorgeous girl a big plastic cup of beer, I said, “Congratulations, Jenny. You were amazing.”

  “Thank you, Bette,” she replied, blushing and smiling back at me shyly. She took the beer I’d offered her and swallowed it in big eager gulps. While the stagehands set up our equipment, we chatted with the two girls, all of us flirting with them at little, except for Caro maybe. Ina moment when she thought I wasn’t looking, I noticed that Caro was scowling at her girlfriend Ina, but also at Nellie and me. When our eyes met, Caro quickly looked away and took on a neutral, one could even say bored expression.

  I noticed, though, that pretty Jenny only seemed to have eyes for our lovely young drummer, Nellie, and vice versa.

  Soon though, it was time for us to go out onstage, and after we performed our little pre-show ritual, we strode out to deafening applause and whistles. I grinned. It was obviously our kind of crowd and the supporting bands had done a great job. The Coldhearts weren’t about to disappoint them. We drove through our first set, starting with our older, better-known songs from our album, and adding some new material here and there. While Caro and Nellie laid out a powerful, steady beat that shook the auditorium, Ina and I made our guitars growl and wail. We changed our positions as much as we could while playing, unless I was standing behind the microphone, singing our song lyrics.

  I kept a close look at the clock, since we were supposed to stop fifteen minutes before midnight. The last song of our first set was a new one that Ina and I had just finished writing only two weeks ago. “This is our last song for the year that’s about to end,” I proclaimed. “It’s one none of you has ever heard before. It’s called ‘Dead End Girl’.”

  We heard excited cheers and whistles from the audience. We’d never played the song live before. It started slowly, and I let my voice be soft and insistent.

  ‘Dead End Girl, listen to me, Dead End Girl, you’re not free…’

  And as I sang our song about all the ways that a girl could be trapped, by circumstances, or by the people around her, I could see the girls in the fro
nt row were listening to me, rapt, as if I were some kind of guru. Then the song took up speed, becoming faster and harder, and as my voice rose and became more and more compelling and urgent, I happened to look in Jenny’s direction. She was standing right next to the stage, where we had stood before. She stared at me as if she were in a trance.

  ‘Dead End Girl, get off your back! Dead End Girl, get off your knees!’

  I nodded to Ina, and she began her guitar solo, shredding her guitar, and then I took over from her again, elaborating on Ina’s solo with my Flying-V, before I screamed the final verse into the microphone:

  ‘Dead End Girl, do you wanna be free? Dead End Girl, get on your feet! Dead End Girl, come with me!’

  Then the song abruptly ended. For a moment there was silence, and then the girls in the audience erupted, screaming at the top of their lungs. I could see some of them were crying. Smiling, we bowed to the audience, and blew kisses to them. Amid the crowd’s thundering applause I announced that ‘The Coldhearts’ would be back onstage not long after midnight.

  Once we were backstage, we laughed boisterously as we high-fived one another and performed our little ritual. After gulping down bottled water to cool us off, we put on our coats and jackets, and went outside to watch the fireworks like everyone else did. It was a cold and clear winter night, and I was happy I’d brought my warm winter coat, a beanie, and a heavy woolen scarf to wrap around my neck. We stood against the wall of the auditorium, with Nellie to my right, and Ina and Caro to my left, holding hands.

  As my bandmates and I stared up at the multicolored lights bursting over our heads like exploding stars, I thought about the coming year. I felt a sudden sense of excitement, a sense that somehow this year could be better than the previous ones. Perhaps watching the fireworks with my bandmates, who were all my friends and who had all been my lovers, made it special somehow?