Hard Rock Hot Heart

by Laura Anne Turner

  Suddenly I felt Nellie take my hand, and I glanced at her, returning her smile. Moments later the bells of our city’s cathedral announced midnight, I wrapped my arms around her, and we kissed tenderly. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Ina and Caro kissing, too.

  I grinned at Nellie. “Happy New Year, Baby Doll,” I said, and she smiled back at me with her lips and her wonderful dark eyes. She hugged me and kissed me again after having said her good wishes. Kissing Nellie made me sentimental for a moment. For the umpteenth time I was wondering why the hell I’d let her go at that time and what would have become of us, hadn’t I been such a damn idiot. Would Nellie have broken my heart like Sarah did? Nellie was a totally different person and maybe we’d stood a chance, but it was over and out and no use agonizing about what could have been.

  When Nellie let go of me, I heard Ina squealing, “Happy Fucking New Year, Bitch Goddess,” and when I turned toward her, she flung her arms around me and kissed me hard, slipping her tongue into my mouth, leaving me completely breathless.

  “Happy New Year yourself, Guitar Princess,” I replied laughing, once I’d had a chance to inhale. Ina laughed, too, before letting go of me.

  Before I even had a chance to worry about whether Caro would be jealous of how her girlfriend had kissed me, Caro herself was right there in front of me, and pulling me into her own arms. Before I was able to read her expression, I was surprised to feel Caro’s lips on mine. I stunned when she kissed me even more thoroughly than Ina had, slipping her tongue into my mouth and squeezing my ass as she did. I heard Ina gasp, but I just closed my eyes and gave in to my redheaded bandmate’s passionate kiss. When we broke our kiss, Caro bit my lip, and Ina was popping the cork of a bottle of champagne. Shaking her head and smiling, she held it out to us, but Caro just took it and passed it to me, so that she could kiss Ina again, only this time like she wanted to tear her lover’s clothes off right then and there.

  I watched them for a moment, shaking my head, before I took a good swig from the bottle. I briefly wondered what had gotten into our bass player, since she acted so contrary to her usual behavior. Caro wasn’t in favor of PDA. I also wasn’t used to her teasing me like that. But then Nellie reached for the bottle, and gulped down the bubbly like she’d gotten thirsty again, and I didn’t care about Caro’s unusual behavior any longer.

  Looking around me I noticed that Emilia and Jenny and the guys in their band were standing not far from us. Grinning I walked over to them, and slinging my arms around the black-haired beauty, I pulled her closer. She was totally stunned when I kissed her gently on her soft lips. At first she was staring at me wide-eyed, but then I noticed how her eyes fluttered shut, and I was tempted to slip my tongue into her mouth, but I held off, not wanting to come on too strong until I was sure she wouldn’t be skittish. So I just waited for her to open her beautiful green eyes, and when she did, I smiled at her, and said, “Happy New Year, Jet-Black Jenny.”

  Jenny’s cheeks turned red, and I knew it wasn’t from the cold. “Happy New Year, Bette,” she replied, sounding shy again.

  I turned to Emilia next, who’d been eying me warily while I kissed her girlfriend, and I smiled broadly at her, pulling her into an embrace and kissing her on her cheeks. The pretty redhead did blush, too. “Happy New Year, Emilia,” I said to her sincerely, “I hope it’ll be a wonderful year for you and Jenny.”

  I could see surprise in the redhead’s eyes, along with a hint of uncertainty. “Thank you, Bette,” she replied after a moment, glancing at her lover. Jenny glanced back and forth between Emilia and me. Neither of them seemed to know quite what to make of me. I suppose I could understand that. Maybe they could see that I really wanted the two of them to be happy together, while at the same time wanting to fuck both of them?

  I wasn’t going to worry too much about not making sense to the girls, since it made a kind of sense to me. They were both hot, and so cute together. A sudden sense of warmth for Emilia and Jenny overcoming me, I put my hands on their shoulders and drew both of them close to me.

  “Listen, you two,” I said earnestly. “I think you and I and the girls in my band have a lot in common, and I’d like us all to get to know each other better. My bandmates are having a party after the show, and I’d like you both to come.” I nodded toward my bandmates, who’d been surrounded by our Crazy Bitches and were chatting animatedly with them. “I’m sure that Ina and Caro and Nellie would love that.” Especially Nellie. I beamed at Emilia and Jenny and said softly, “How about it, Lovebirds? Want to join our little private party later?”

  Jenny looked at Emilia, apparently willing to go along with whatever her girlfriend wanted. Emilia looked back at Jenny for a long moment, and then her eyes darted toward my bandmates, who were flirting with our fan girls, and then back to me. Her blue eyes met mine, and she cleared her throat. Smiling to cover her obvious nervousness, she said, “It’s really nice of you to invite us, Bette. But we and the guys in our band all came here together, and I think we should all leave together.” After a moment she added politely, “Maybe we can see you and the rest of the girls in your band some other time?”

  “I understand, Emilia.” My lips curved upward in a sensual smile, and I locked eyes with her. “You and Jenny want to spend the night together, don’t you?” Emilia blushed becomingly. I laughed softly. “Ah, young love, and young lust. That’s so adorable.”

  Her pretty face turned a bright red. Suddenly I thought of Julia, and of Nellie, too, and I turned serious. “I remember what it was like.” I glanced toward Jenny and back at Emilia. “You know, actually, I kind of envy the two of you.” Both girls stared at me, puzzled. I shrugged and said, “I should be getting back to my Heavy Metal Bitches now. We have to play our second set.”

  I slapped Emilia on the shoulder, and then did the same to Jenny. “It was great meeting you two Lovebirds, and I hope to see you both again soon.” Before turning around, I gazed at them languidly from beneath my eyelashes and lowering my voice I added, “Enjoy your night.”

  I left them, and as I walked back to my bandmates, I glanced at Jenny and Emilia from over my shoulder and winked. They were staring back at me, looking as startled as if I’d just smacked them both on their lovely butts.

  Actually, I didn’t feel as joyful as I’d pretended to be. I really did envy the two lovebirds, but they had reminded me of things that I wanted and needed to forget. I joined my band mates and the group of fan girls. My eyes met those of a cute Goth girl in an ankle-length black leather coat. Her hair was dyed a purple color that matched the leather choker around her slender neck. There was something written on the collar in little black letters. I leaned closer to her to read it. It said ‘It pleases me to please you.’

  I flashed her one of my tigress grins, and she smiled back timidly, trembling slightly. “Happy New Year, my Lovely,” I said to her in a husky tone. “What’s your name, Sweetheart?”

  I glanced at the blackberry-colored lipstick she was wearing, as the corners of her lips moved up to a smile. “Happy New Year, Goddess Bette,” she said in a voice that was soft and feminine. It made me feel as though she was actually caressing me in my most private places. My smile grew even bigger. She was really, really cute, and quite obviously and intriguingly submissive. “My name is Samira, Goddess Bette,” she added with her velvety voice, fluttering her long lashes at me as she gazed up into my eyes.

  My decision was easy to make. She was absolutely adorable and sexy and I wanted her in my bed tonight. Easy. I wasn’t a dominatrix, but I could fake one, couldn’t I? I had enough experience to do that.

  I gazed deeply into her dark eyes. “What a beautiful name. Samira. It sounds like music,” I answered, savoring the sound of her name, and grinning broadly. “The name matches the beauty of its owner.”

  Slipping my index finger through the ring on her collar, I pulled her to me; close enough to gently kiss her soft lips. She blushed adorably, her eyes wide and she was trembling slightly again. “Listen to me, lov
ely Samira,” I whispered urgently. “If you really want to please me as the caption on your chocker says, you’ll meet me after our second set. Would you like that, Sweetheart?”

  Samira nodded, obviously lost in my eyes, and when I leaned in and nipped her earlobe, she shuddered again, her eyes fluttering shut. When she opened her dark eyes again she looked dazed. She nodded her pretty head under her chin-length purple hair once more. “I’ll be waiting for you at the stage entrance, Goddess,” she managed to say.

  “Good. See you then,” I told her with a grin, while I checked my watch. I kissed her one more time, before turning to my bandmates.

  “Ladies, time for our second set,” I announced crisply. They glanced back and forth between Samira and me, but they didn’t say a word. Nellie gazed at her Converse shoes, while Ina took Caro’s hand, and they followed me back into the auditorium. Had my behavior become that annoying? Even to my bandmates?

  Once we were back onstage, we stormed through our second set, rocking just as fiercely as we had our first set, and we ended our night to the roars and screams of the crowd after our second encore, our cover version of ‘Sunshine of Your Love’.

  Samira was waiting for me after our gig ended, just as she said she would. She was very eager to carry my guitar case for me. I smiled indulgently, and let her do it. I took her back with me to the farmhouse, where we joined the party for a while. Instead of dancing, I sat on the leather couch with Samira on my lap, kissing her and getting drunk. Before I got too drunk however, I led her upstairs to my bedroom.

  I’d been right in my assessment, Samira loved being dominated by me, and although I wasn’t a dominatrix by nature, I had a lot of fun with her. I tied her up on my bed with her arms and legs spread wide open, and played with her. I took my time with this sweet girl. I brought her close to her release several times until she moaned and squirmed. I didn’t make her cum however. Instead, I sat on her pretty face and let her eat my pussy. She was really good at eating pussy and so I didn’t last very long and came hard. Then she got her own reward. I fingered her while sucking her swollen pearl, until she exploded into my mouth.

  Afterwards we even talked for a bit, too, even though I was exhausted and usually didn’t do that. It turned out that besides being pretty and sweet, Samira was a smart girl, too. Of course she knew about my reputation, and so she knew that the two of us were only going to be together this first night of the New Year.

  If I’d only been a different person! I would certainly have asked her to stay with me for a little while longer. Maybe even see her again. She’d totally have been worth it. But alas, I wasn’t that person. I was Bette Coldheart, and I had built a wall around my heart. I couldn’t allow this wall crumbling to pieces. Although it hurt I asked Samira to leave in the morning, and I hated myself for doing it. When I did, she got dressed without making a scene. I was watching her while she got dressed and noticed the deep sadness in her eyes. It really got to me and I couldn’t forget about it for quite some time.

  As I watched her leave, I felt darkness well up from inside me, and once again, I loathed the person I’d become.

  CHAPTER 2 – JENNIFER COLDHEART

  While I was lying on my comfy bed with my eyes closed, and memories came and went, Samira’s pretty face and the sad look in her eyes appeared in my mind’s eye. I felt my own eyes getting wet and I wondered what had become of her? I could only hope she had found someone better. She deserved someone better than me.

  Sighing, I got up, went downstairs to the kitchen and took a bottle of water from the fridge. The house was totally quiet. Ina was probably still crashing and I supposed that Nellie was reading one of her books. At least I couldn’t hear a sound.

  I went back to my room, sat down on my bed, and gulped down some of the water from the bottle. I laid down again. I realized that my pillow still smelled of Tanja’s perfume. My pulse rate increased, and once again I asked myself if I’d been foolish to let the pretty and quick-witted blonde leave without having asked her for her phone number. I shook my head. It was useless. She was gone, just like Samira on New Year’s Day. I sighed and closed my eyes. Suddenly I remembered the incidents that had so dramatically influenced the course of this year.

  Still eight months earlier

  Caro dropped the bomb on us only a couple of days after our New Year’s Eve gig. It was a Friday evening, and Nellie had made a wonderful pasta dinner for us, which was accompanied by a good Italian red wine, and followed by her homemade Tiramisu for dessert. ‘The Coldhearts’ were gathered around the living room table, drinking Grappa as a digestive.

  Reclining in my chair, I felt perfectly content and was just thinking about having a smoke, when Caro cleared her throat. Without looking at any of us, more like staring at a point on the opposite wall, she said quietly and in a monotonous voice, “There’s something I need to tell you guys.”

  I glanced up at her, puzzled. She’d been quiet during dinner and seemed lost in her own thoughts. Whatever she’d had on her mind, I supposed we were about to find out now.

  “Yes, Caro?” I asked her, encouragingly. Suddenly I remembered her unusual behavior on New Year’s Eve.

  She looked up, her eyes finally meeting mine. Her gray-blue eyes were turbulent, as if she was in the grip of some powerful emotion. I remembered the morning after our first threesome with her and Ina, when I’d thought that Caro was a ticking time bomb, and I got the feeling that something bad was about to happen. Ina, who was sitting on a chair to my right, looked up sharply at her girlfriend. Maybe she had the same feeling I had?

  Caro’s eyes darted between Ina and me, before her eyes locked with mine. She took a deep breath, and said flatly, “Well, it’s like this, I’ve met someone.”

  Three pairs of eyes were on Caro now. From the corner of my eye I saw how Ina sat up straight in her chair.

  “What exactly does that mean, you’ve met someone?” I asked, sitting upright now, too, with my hands on the table.

  “For the past couple of weeks I’ve been seeing someone. Her name’s Marion, and you know, last night she told me that she’d gotten a new job in Hamburg, and she asked me to go with her,” Caro went on in that strange monotonous voice, still not looking at Ina. Then she looked at me.

  For a second there was an uncomfortable silence in the room while everyone was trying to digest what Caro had just said. Ina was staring at her wide-eyed, apparently unable to speak. Then she exclaimed in bewilderment, “What? Caro, Sweetheart, what are you saying?”

  Her girlfriend stared back at her for a long moment. Then she said without any change in her expressionless tone, “I said yes to her.”

  There was another moment of silence. I was sure we could have heard a needle drop. Ina was utterly shocked, not to say horrified. “Are you saying you’re leaving me? After all these years? We’ve been together for so many years, and now you’re leaving me just like that? For a total stranger?” she gasped.

  Caro nodded, looking grim. I was just as shocked. “Wait! Are you telling us that you’re not only breaking up with Ina, but also leaving the band, too?”

  The redhead heaved herself out of her chair, and folding her arms over her chest, her eyes met mine. She smiled at me bitterly. “That’s right, Bitch Goddess, I can no longer play in the same band with you. I’ve had enough.”

  I stared at her in stunned disbelief. What she was saying made no sense to me. She’d delivered a great job playing bass for ‘The Coldhearts’ and she’d always seemed happy. She loved our gigs I was sure.

  Her relationship with Ina was a completely different story. I’d frankly lost count on how many times their relationship had been on and off, but they’d always found a way of getting together again. All in all they’d been an item since I first met the two of them a couple of years ago. I knew how jealous she could be, but why did she have to be such a bitch now? Why that secretiveness?

  Before I could say anything, Ina cried out, tears welling up in her blue eyes. “Caro! If you felt thi
s way, why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you talk to me? How can you just throw everything we had away after all these years?”

  “Jesus fucking Christ!” Caro burst out furiously. “You knew how I felt! I told you over and over, you motherfucking slut! I don’t know how often you broke my heart! And I couldn’t do anything if I didn’t want to lose you. I’ve got enough of you! It’s over!”

  Ina just stared at Caro, tears streaming down her cheeks. She looked at Caro as if she were an alien, a strange creature whose thinking she couldn’t begin to comprehend.

  Caro’s harsh words woke me from my shock, replacing it by cold rage. I remembered that I’d once thought that I’d always take Ina’s side if I were forced to. Obviously, this time had come. Ina wasn’t only my lover and friend; she was like a sister to me. I wasn’t about to let anyone talk to her the way Caro was doing.

  I immediately got up from my chair, stepping between Caro and Ina. I shot a brief glance at Nellie, who was sitting in her chair, watching the whole scene with her mouth hanging open. She was clearly shocked, too. I nodded toward Ina, and our drummer understood what I wanted from her. She moved her chair close to Ina’s, and put her arm around the bewildered girl. Now I was ready to deal with Caro.

  “So, Caro, you’re dumping Ina and leaving the band to run away with some bitch you’ve starting fucking, and that’s all our fault?” I said in a soft, dangerous tone, while clenching my fists.

  Now Caro turned pale, apparently shocked, but it took her only a moment, before a smug grin appeared on her face.

  “Who’s the fuckin’ bitch here, Bette?” Caro hissed. “I’ve got enough of you, Bette Coldheart. You’ve no idea how much I hated you all these years; how much I hated you every time you fucked Ina. And I know you fucked her quite often. You thought I didn’t know it, but I’m not stupid. I felt so humiliated. I even agreed to threesomes! I hate you for what you did to me, Bette. Love is about more than fucking, but that’s nothing you nor Ina know anything about.” Caro shook her head, grimly. “I can’t even remember how many girls you’ve brought home, fucked and thrown away in the morning without caring about them. That’s disgusting.”