Will To Live

by C. M. Wright

  I quickly start the truck and pull back on the road. We have at least six hours until we reach my sister's, and that's only if we aren't having to detour much. I send a quick, but sincere, prayer upwards that the rest of the trip is smooth and uneventful.

  Ha ha.

  Yeah, right.

  Chapter Twelve

  The first couple of hours, no big deal. Stopped for more food, water, and bathroom breaks. Nick drove for a while so I could rest. And, of course, we killed a few more zombies.

  You see? No big deal.

  Okay, whoa. Wait.

  Killing zombies is now “no big deal”? I must be more exhausted than I thought. I'm sorry. It was a big d– No!

  It was a huge deal.

  Aw, I can't lie. It really has become no big deal.

  But when we stop in some random small town for the thousandth time – sure as hell seems like it – to take Bert to the bathroom – once again – Nick and I agree to switch seats and let me drive for a while.

  It's not easy to drive when people walk out in front of you all the damn time. You thought the random deer was bad...ha! Try zombies.

  So once we get Bert back inside the truck, I drive around the small town looking for a gas pump. On the edge of town, I pull in to an old parking lot, which is littered with some major potholes. The station and pump look ancient, and I can only pray that they still work. There are some zombies roaming around the lot, so Nick and I shoot them before I proceed to pull in front of the pump.

  Yes, pump...a single pump.

  It's on Nick's side, so he agrees to do fill the tank. I volunteer to go inside the station to turn the pump on, while he keeps watch out here. The sun is going down, and it's going to get a lot trickier to survive in the dark. It always is.

  I reach the door with no problems, and pause to look through the glass to see what's waiting for me.

  Nothing.

  I slowly pull the door open and step inside. My gun is ready of course, and my heart is pounding like hell. I fully expect an undead to walk out from one of the back rooms, or from behind one of the shelves, or even to be hiding behind the counter as if they have the capability to think of hiding.

  But the only thing I see is a zombie lying on the ground with a bullet-hole in its head, so I go behind the counter and find the switch to turn the pump on. Pushing the button, I watch out the window until Nick gives me a thumbs up that it's working. I then turn to go back around the counter, and with no warning, I'm hit with so much force, that I swear I bounce when my back and ass make contact with the tile that had once been under my feet.

  My gun clatters across the floor when I fall, and I frantically scramble towards it. But hands reach down and grab my leg, pulling me back. I look behind me as I scream and prepare for the teeth to sink into my leg, until I get a good look at the person behind me.

  “No!” I scream even louder.

  He's barely alive- and I honestly believe, at this point, that he's more zombie than human. But he can still speak. He says my name, “Can-ah-dah.”

  “Give me ma sho-ot, Can-ah-dah.”

  His words come out as moans, but he is clearly speaking to me.

  I'm terrified. I can't respond to him, I can't even breathe very well. Jake is here, right here in front of me. Half man, half zombie.

  He's so strong, I can't even pull my leg out of his grasp. I kick him, and he grunts from the pain of it, but his grip doesn't let up one bit. I watch as his eyes start to dull even more, then focus on my bare leg. Drool begins to leave his mouth in long trails. I scream again as he starts to lower his head toward my flesh, and my efforts to get away from him increase in intensity.

  Just as I feel his hot breath on my leg, Nick appears behind him. He jams a syringe into Jake's neck, then shoves him to the side. Jake doesn't release my leg, instead he gives it a hard yank towards his face. Nick grabs a baseball bat that's lying under the counter and gives Jake a nice whack on the head. Jake's hands relax, and I jerk my leg away before scrambling to my feet.

  “Kill him, Nick! For god's sake, kill him!” I scream at him, but he grabs my arms and pushes me against the wall.

  “Canada, listen to me. We can't kill him, remember? We need him. He's the only one who knows what the antidote is. I just hope he isn't so far gone that we can't bring him back.”

  I shake my head no, sobbing and pleading with Nick.

  I know he's right, but Jake is the one person who terrifies me even more than the zombies. I can pretend to be a badass all I want, and I can convince myself I really am, up until I see his face. Hell, even just hearing his voice sends me into an intense mind-numbing panic.

  Nick forces me to sit against the wall, and I do, although my body trembles with the intensity of my fear. I become nervous– No. Scratch that. – I'm just downright freaking terrified when Nick leaves me and walks behind one of the shelves out in the customer area of the station.

  I lock my eyes on Jake, ready to run at the first twitch he might make. Soon, Nick comes back carrying a package of rope and ties Jake's hands behind his back, then takes the leftover rope and leaving it uncut, ties his ankles so that any movement of his feet will pull his arms into a very uncomfortable position. It'll do the same to his legs if he tries to move his arms.

  Finally, Nick drags him to the door and I wait inside, my gun trained on Jake, until Nick comes back with the truck. After helping Nick load Jake into the bed of the truck, I keep an eye out for any approaching trouble while Nick ties our captive securely in the back.

  “Get me one of the blankets, Canada.”

  I grab one out of the cab of the truck, ignoring Ernie and Bert's questions for now. Nick covers Jake, then jumps out of the truck and pulls me a few feet away so we can talk.

  “Are you okay?” he asks me, his face showing his very real concern for me.

  I nod and he gives me a brief hug. “I won't leave you alone with him. I promise. I'll keep you safe, Canada. I swear.”

  I know he means well, and truly believes he can keep his promises, but Jake always seems to keep one step ahead. Always.

  I just give Nick a halfhearted smile and nod. We make our way back to the truck and I agree to drive so Nick can keep an eye on Jake. I also let him explain however much he wants the older couple to know about the situation. To my surprise, he tells them everything: that Jake is part zombie, that he is the only one we are aware of that knows the antidote – which is the only reason, but a very important reason, we must keep him alive.

  The older couple show varying degrees of surprise, but in the end, they seem to accept it pretty well. I know Ernie has to be furious that the man who shot him and his wife is right here in the same vehicle with him, but for the sake of keeping mankind alive and well, he has no choice but to leave him alone. Bert should seem scared or angry, but she just isn't. She actually seems a little too pleasant about the whole thing.

  “Bert? You okay?” I ask her, taking a quick look at her from the corner of my eye.

  “What? Oh yes, dear, I'm just fine. It's such a lovely day, isn't it?”

  I turn my head and give her a much better look when I hear the dreamlike tone to her voice. Maybe the pain pills Nick gave her are working just a little too well, since she's obviously in a much better time and place than the rest of us are at the moment. The grin on her face is much too big, she's humming a pleasant little tune, and she's even doing a little butt-wiggle dancing in her seat.

  I just nod and turn my attention back to the road.

  No use arguing with the lady.

  We drive for hours, passing other moving vehicles every once in a while. It's completely dark now, and there's no way in hell I intend to stop for anyone, especially not knowing if they're alive or a zombie – and if they are alive, exactly what their intentions might be.

  We've had way too much drama and trauma for one day, thank you very much!

  Nick has the back slider window open just enough for him to be able to hear Jake. He hasn't struggled to get f
ree yet, but Nick tells us he's moved a bit. But mostly, he just moans. At this point, we still have no idea if the shot worked or if Jake is a full-fledged member of the undead.

  A thought suddenly occurs to me, and I ask Nick where he got the shot he injected into Jake. He tells me before he left the others to come find me, he grabbed a few of them just in case I'd been bit and he could save me.

  “You couldn't have grabbed me some of my clothes too?” I tease him.

  “Hell no! I ain't touching no chick underwear. Especially yours, since you like wearing granny clothes. I'm sure it would have embarrassed us both. Do you have them in multicolor? Or do you prefer them in boring white white?”

  “You're such a heifer,” I say under my breath.

  Bert chimes in, still in a dreamlike state, “I prefer my shiny red thong panties. You should get you a pair of those, Canada. You'll have no problem getting men then. They won't be able to resist you.”

  Nick, Ernie, and I all stare at the highly-drugged woman. Then, with our mouth's dropped wide in astonishment, we look at each other.

  When Nick and I both turn to stare with new eyes at Ernie, he blushes a deep red and says, “Oh, guys. Come on. She doesn't know what the hell she's saying. Bert doesn't own any thong underwear.” After a few moments pause, he adds quickly, “I don't even know what thong underwear are!”

  Nick and I exchange another look, this one saying we don't believe a word of it.

  Ernie's not a very good liar.

  Chapter Thirteen

  An hour from my sister's house and the excitement kicks in.

  Finally, I will be back with my family, the people I love above all else.

  I start getting hyper, talking non-stop, and literally bouncing in the driver's seat.

  Half an hour from my sister's place, I go silent. The bouncing stops and stiffness takes its place, while clusters of different emotions spin in my stomach and unwelcome thoughts bombard my mind.

  Oh, dear god! What if something has happened to my family? What if something has happened to my kids?

  No! Nothing has happened to them. Stop thinking shit like that.

  And Will? Is he alive?

  If he is still alive, how's he going to react when he finds out I'm pregnant?

  I still haven't even decided if I should tell him Jake had raped me, and the baby I'm carrying may not be his, that it very well could be Jake's baby. To be honest, as long as Will's alive and well, that's really all that matters. I'll deal with this other shit later.

  I do my best to push it all to the back of my mind, but fear, uncertainty, and terror still take over to consume me. Only a small amount of excitement remains, though it's a lot harder to feel with every mile marker I pass.

  I turn at the exit which leads to my family, and just a little farther, turn again onto the road to get to the house. Finally, I reach the gates to my sister's home, our home now. I stop and just stare at the large heavy-duty new gate blocking our way with the words “Rose's Refuge” beautifully placed above in golden cursive letters. No one else speaks. No one else moves. I'm obviously not the only one nervous about arriving. Excluding Jake, none of the others know anyone here. They're probably afraid of meeting so many new people, people who they aren't real sure will welcome them.

  After at least five full minutes of quiet, we begin to hear the sound of a motor, which seems to be getting closer. Finally, a four-wheeler bursts from the trees and heads toward us. My fear is forgotten when I see my brother, Andy, the cop.

  I barely manage to use enough sense to check for zombies before jumping out and rushing the gate. At first, Andy screams at me to stay back, but when he realizes who I am his 'I'm a cop and will kick your ass' attitude changes, and he shouts my name and almost wrecks the damn four-wheeler trying to get to me faster. When I move forward, he again orders me to stop in a no-nonsense tone. I do, but I'm confused as hell as to why he is giving me the order.

  Andy stops the four-wheeler and jumps off. He then yells at me to read the sign and points to my left. I look up at the large red sign that says 'Danger! Electrified Fence & Gate'. I feel like a fool because I hadn't seen the damn thing, as obvious as it is.

  Andy then runs over to a large box. He opens it, flips a huge switch down, then flips another switch up and the gate finally begins to roll open. My brother then runs toward me and hugs me so hard I feel and hear snaps and cracks in several places, but we just laugh and ignore the sounds of my body protesting the reunion.

  Finally, we release each other and he starts firing questions at me. I immediately feel sorry for all the suspects who had to go through this with him.

  The man is relentless!

  I answer some of the safer questions, but soon plead exhaustion and the need to see my family when the interrogation begins to make me squirm a bit. I'm astonished when at first he seems like he could care less about my needs, but then I see his eyes soften and focus on me. I can only assume he forgot he isn't on the job, and I'm not a criminal so–

  Fine! Alright, yes I am. I haven't forgotten what I did to the men outside of Hill City., but can we just put that aside for now and let me enjoy my reunion? Please?

  He looks toward the truck when Nick opens the passenger door, then turns his attention back to me. “Can, who are these people?”

  “Oh! Sorry, Andy. These are all people who helped me and saved my life. Nick, the one getting out now, saved me from Jake and helped me escape. They're good people and they need us.”

  Andy nods and starts to walk toward Nick, but before he can take more than a second step, I remember Jake and grab his arm. “Andy, there's something you need to know. It's important that you listen to me first, before doing anything you'll regret later.”

  He tells me that since he's a cop it's impossible for him to agree to that. So I just take a deep breath and send a quick prayer that he remains calm, before saying, “Jake has an antidote for this zombie shit. He's the only one that we know of who has it. He invented it himself. We need him, Andy, and we have him. He's tied up in the back of the truck.”

  Andy surprises me when he just nods and says, “I know about the antidote,” then walks away to meet Nick.

  I'm frozen where I stand as I wonder what the hell he's talking about, and where he could possibly have heard about the antidote. Finally realizing that the answers aren't going to magically come to me through my magnificent brain, I follow Andy to the truck. He greets and welcomes Nick, Ernie, and Bert before checking to make sure Jake is secure enough to his satisfaction. Apparently he is, because he tells me to pull the truck through so we can get the gate shut.

  Once I'm inside, Andy and I walk over to the box and he explains that the gate is electrified and locked by the switches inside.

  “But what happens when we lose power? How will we get out then?” I ask.

  “We've already lost power, a few weeks ago as a matter of fact. Right now, we're using generators. We have rules for when they can be used, but mostly it's only to power the gate and for the medical building. We can still unlock and open the gate manually though, if we lose the generator or need to shut it off.”

  “Medical building? Damn. So much has changed hasn't it, Andy?”

  “You've been gone a few months, Canada, so a lot has changed. There are a lot more people living here too. But we never forgot you, we never stopped looking.” Andy pauses and his head jerks up, as if he hears something.

  I listen too. Eventually, the crunch of rocks beneath tires can be heard. Andy orders us all to get in the truck and pull up into the woods where we can't be seen from the road.

  He moves the four-wheeler into the woods closest to the gate box and waits. Nick and I get back out of the hidden truck and sneak to the edge of the trees and bushes where we can see what's going on. One of the large black Hummers pull up to the outside of the gate, and I watch as someone opens the door. Once that door shuts, and I can clearly see who is behind it, my mind thinks only one thing...run!

  So I do. I
run as fast and as hard as I can toward the gate. I barely register hearing Andy scream at me to stop – something about the gate. Just before my hands touch the metal I remember it's electrified, but I can't stop the force of my body from slamming into it.

  But nothing happens! No powerful force throws me through the air. No pain of lightening bolts fry my insides to mush. Andy had managed to shut it off just in time.

  I don't even waste a second or a breath to throw out a thank you to my brother, all I can think of is getting to my husband. Will is on the other side of the gate, his hands jerking at the gate on his side, while I'm tearing at it, trying to get through any way I can on my side. I can't think straight.

  I want my husband. And I want him now!

  At last, the gate moves and I throw myself into Will's arms. We're both sobbing like babies, alternating between holding each other tight, suffocating each other with our kisses, and pulling away to get a good look at each other.

  “Canada, I can't believe you're really here! I missed you so much. We all have. Our boys? Have they seen you yet?” Will finally pauses, giving me time to answer.

  “No one has, but you and Andy.” I hear a cough and look past Will to see my youngest brother, Ryder, his wife, Coco, and their two sons, Joel and Gage. Death grip on his arm, I drag Will with me to reunite with them. It feels so good to be around people who know and love me, and who I love just as much in return.

  Finally, my need to see my boys and the rest of the family overwhelms me, and we all begin to load back up to finish the drive to the house. I ride with Will in the Hummer, unwilling to be separated from him for even the short amount of time it will take to get to the house.

  But in all the excitement, I totally forgot to warn Will about Jake.

  Another big mistake on my part.

  Chapter Fourteen

  No. Don't worry. Will doesn't kill him. But he damn sure probably makes Jake wish he had. We couldn't stop Will. And yes, we all tried. Will has bulked up quite a bit since I last saw him. The rage I see in his eyes are scary as hell. He's not the same man I left behind, and I'm not gonna lie, but that scares me a bit. I can't help but wonder if he and I – and our relationship – is still the same, or if it has forever changed like so much else since I've been gone. If it hasn't yet, I'm sure it soon will after certain truths are revealed.