Irresistible Refrain

by Michelle Mankin

  I took out a needle and thread and started to work. After a while, I heard a lot of banging around outside the door followed by the sound of the guys playing their instruments. I picked up my stuff and wandered back to the front to join them.

  Bryan’s light colored eyes searched mine for a brief moment before he looked away. I’d immediately recognized the melody he was strumming. It was the one I’d been working on after the first time we’d made love. Lucky for me he didn’t have the lyrics that went with it. If he sang those right now it would probably kill me.

  Why was he doing this to me?

  2 years ago

  I smoothed a finger over her brow. She looked so peaceful while she slept.

  What had I done?

  I’d convinced myself last night that I loved her so intensely that it must be right. But as daylight seeped in through the blinds in her bedroom, I knew that I couldn’t hide from the glaring consequences of my actions.

  A couple of soft knocks might as well have been the shots of a firing squad to my guilty conscious.

  My gaze snapped to the door.

  “Bryan if you’re in there,” Dizzy’s voice whispered from outside, “you need to wake up, man.”

  Shit.

  Carefully, I moved to the edge of the bed and pulled on the tuxedo pants I’d worn the night before. I glanced back at Lace. She held the black ribbon in one of her hands and was lying on her side, her beautiful blond hair spilled across the pillow. The sheet had fallen away from her chest.

  The beautiful Cinderella without her ball gown.

  Dizzy knocked again.

  Time for the prince to leave.

  I slid the ribbon from her grasp, tucked it in my pocket, gently pulled the sheet back up, and moved for the door, grabbing my shirt, jacket, and tie on the way.

  Dizzy’s amber eyes widened when he saw me. “I hoped I was wrong.”

  I shrugged. I wasn’t going to get into this with him right now.

  “War’s on his way over.” Dizzy ran a hand across his face. I felt my stomach drop. “If he sees you here with her, it’s gonna be over for all of us. Ruin everything for everyone. Right when we’ve got two labels fighting over us. Never figured you were such a self-centered prick.”

  Panicking, I blurted the first thing that came to mind. “War doesn’t need to know.” My stomach churned. “It was just prom. Getting laid is a rite of passage. It didn’t mean anything.”

  “What is that mellow shit you’re playing?” Dizzy’s question brought my wandering thoughts back to the present. Of course he didn’t recognize it. Only Lace and I knew that melody. I’d meant it as a message. To remind her of what we had once shared. To remind her of that night that she had been mine alone.

  “Yeah, man,” Sager parroted pushing his jet black hair out of his eyes before he put his pick between his lips and plugged in his bass. “What we need is some good road music.”

  “‘Endless Highway.’” King banged his sticks against a practice snare pad.

  “No, way.” Sager made a face. “RHCP ‘Road Trippin’.”

  I snuck a peek back at Lace while King and Sager continued to argue about the merits of their choices. Her head was down, blond hair spilling over the top edge of an embroidered ivory blouse while her fingers deftly weaved a needle in and out of a scrappy piece of white fabric she held.

  “I’ve got it. The perfect song. ‘Born to Be Wild.’ That’s us right there.” King started laying down the intro beat and Dizzy joined in on rhythm guitar.

  “Steppenwolf. Hell, yeah. Good one, King.” Sager picked up his cell. “Hold up. We need to get this on our YouTube channel.”

  “You guys have a YouTube channel?” I slanted a brow.

  Sager nodded. “TMT. Tempting Men of Tempest.” He and King moved back to back, arms crossed over their chests. “We’re dynamite and sin all wrapped up together.”

  I laughed.

  “Don’t be a hater, man. We’ve got over thirty-thousand subscribers.”

  “Lined up lots of good tail because of it,” King said proudly, lips curving up. “Primo poon. Remember, Dana?” He wiggled his brows.

  “Oh, yeah.” Sager nodded. “Redheads are sweet. Remember her, Bullet?”

  I frowned and glanced over at Lace

  Her lips were flat as our eyes met.

  “Hey, Bryan.”

  I looked back at Sager.

  “We need a cameraman.”

  I nodded and took Sager’s cell and began filming as soon as the guys started up again. War wandered over during the second play through and provided the vocals. Lace put down her sewing and started twirling around in the aisle on her bare feet, like a young Stevie Nicks in that gypsy top as she sang along with him.

  I felt my lips pull up into a nostalgic smile as I watched them. This was how it had all been when we’d first started out, jamming in that old musty garage, covering our favorite tunes. It had been fun and easy when it had just been about the music.

  Suddenly, the bus lurched to a stop. I glanced out the window. “Looks like we’re stopping for fuel.”

  “Thanks, man.” Sager grabbed his phone from my hand. “Let’s go get some snacks, King.”

  “Wait up,” Dizzy called. “I’m coming, too. I need some new reading material. How ‘bout it, Bryan?” he asked over his shoulder.

  “Sure.” I glanced at Lace. “I’m betting they have popcorn.”

  “Then I’m in.” She turned back. “You want anything, War?”

  He shook his head, pointing to the cell he held to his ear. “I need to finish this call.”

  While the others filed into the truck stop, I lingered, checking on the driver and trying not to look suspicious. But I was determined to find a moment alone with Lace.

  I found her at the back, near the coolers. Placing my hands on her arms, I leaned over her shoulder and wasn’t surprised when I felt her muscles tense beneath the gauzy sleeves. “We need to talk,” I insisted turning her to face me.

  “No, Bry.” She shook her head. “What’s left to discuss?”

  “Lots.” I pulled my fingers through my hair. “The messed up shit you’re doing with War for one.” Over on the adjacent aisle, I heard King’s raised voice as he popped off to someone. Usually loud and boisterous with a notoriously quick fuse, the only time our drummer was shy and quiet was around the ladies. At the moment, though, I only had interest in one person.

  Eyes back to Lace, I shifted closer, trapping her between my arms so she couldn’t move. “I can’t get you out of my head and that was before the kiss we shared on the bus. If you’re being honest, I don’t think you can either. Emptying the minibar was the only thing that kept me from coming and taking you away from him last night.”

  I saw the truth reflected in her eyes. “I’ve never forgotten prom and how it was between us,” I said emphatically and probably a little too loudly. I yanked her closer, watching her tongue dart out to moisten her lips. I wanted to pull it into my own mouth, and that was just for starters. “Don’t tell me there’s nothing left to say.” I slid my hands up to cradle her face, and lowered my voice. “Meet me tomorrow morning in the hotel workout room in Atlanta. Eight o’clock.”

  “I can’t.” She shook her head.

  “Bullshit,” I said tersely. “Find a way, Lace. If you don’t show, I’ll come find you.”

  The guys were stuffing their faces with fast food.

  “C’mon, Lacey,” War admonished when I complained about the smell. He waved a French fry under my nose. “You used to love McDonalds.”

  “No, I didn’t.” I shook my head and raised my brows. “You must be getting me confused with the other love of your life,” I teased. “Yourself.”

  “Dick’s Drive-In was her favorite,” Bryan muttered under his breath, his eyes meeting mine.

  War frowned.

  Back in high school whenever War and I fought, Bryan would take me to Dick’s to let me vent.

  3 years ago

  Sitting on top o
f the picnic table, tracing the graffiti someone had carved into the wood, I watched Bryan covertly. He had gotten even more handsome over the past year, his former boyish frame filling out in all the right places, especially with the weight lifting he and War had starting doing together. He’d shot up in height, too. He was well over six feet now.

  My cheeks started to burn when his gorgeous greyish green eyes met mine. I’d been a sucker for them since I was five. He raised a dark brow.

  “What?” I challenged.

  “You were totally checking me out, Lace Lowell.” He bumped my shoulder. “Don’t even try to deny it.”

  “As if.” I rolled my eyes and took a loud sip of the last dregs of my strawberry shake, desperate for something to ease the dryness in my throat.

  He mumbled under his breath.

  “What’d you say?”

  “I said, you ok now? I mean about War and all.”

  “I guess. He just pisses me off. He doesn’t understand why I need to study.” I shivered and rubbed my arms. It had been warm during the day, but now that the sun had gone down, I regretted the short sleeves and not bringing a jacket.

  “Do what you need to do. Don’t let him get you sidetracked from your goals, Lace.” Bryan shrugged out of his black hoodie and held it out for me. “Here.”

  “Thanks,” I mumbled, placing my arms in the sleeves. It was still warm from his body heat. He scooted closer, ducking down to fasten it for me. My nose was inches away from the top of his head. I inhaled the spicy scent of him while he zipped it up. When his head lifted, his face was so close that his warm breath fanned against my mouth. Eyes on his parted lips, I shivered again.

  “Geez, Lace. You should have let on sooner that you were this cold.” He used his sexy deep voice that made me want to smash my lips to his.

  “I’m alright.” I scooted away, needing some space to get my hammering heart back under control, but then I made the mistake of glancing in his direction. The t-shirt he’d worn under the jacket was snug, way too small. He’d obviously outgrown it. The material stretched tight over his pecs and the sleeves dug into his muscular arms.

  The white color was a perfect showcase for his new tat sleeves. I’d told him I thought tats were a waste of money. Looking at his through my lashes, I decided I’d changed my mind. The intricate black Japanese characters spelled out his mom’s and his sisters’ names. They were sexy as hell, and worth every single penny. I imagined tracing the marks with my fingers or maybe even my tongue.

  Stop it, Lace. Just like back then, I found myself letting out a shaky breath. Bryan was standing right in front of me and his black tee had ridden up providing a glimpse of his bared midsection as he rummaged around in the top cabinet for a couple of shot glasses. The view of his flat abs and contoured hip bones had me mesmerized.

  “Lacey, the guys wanna know if you’re in for a game of truth or dare,” War asked me, his brow dipping. “You ok? You seem really distracted today.”

  “I’m fine.” I shrugged. “Does this game work like the one we played when we were kids?”

  “Basically, yeah. We still find out embarrassing shit about each other. But now we get really drunk, too,” King explained.

  “Fun times,” I quipped.

  “Rules are twenty dollars and a shot of tequila to whoever passes the truth or dare challenge,” Dizzy announced. “Oh, and the last person left standing usually gets a bonus prize.”

  “A kiss from Lace,” King shouted out.

  I smiled at his enthusiasm. “Like that’s anything special.”

  “How ‘bout a night to sleep in the back bedroom?” Sager asked, rolling up the sleeves of his Black Flag concert tee. “No offense, Lace, but you and War have been hogging it.”

  “Not happening,” War muttered. “I’m sleeping with Lace, and I’m not sleeping with her in a bunk.”

  “Uh-oh, looks like someone drank all of the tequila recently.” A look I didn’t understand passed between Dizzy and Bryan. Bottles clinked as Sager continued to search for something suitable in the cabinet. “How about vodka?”

  I wrinkled my nose. “Ok. I guess.”

  Dizzy removed his jacket and took a seat on the couch beside War and me. Sager, King, and Bryan sat on the couch opposite.

  “Who’s going first?” Bryan asked.

  “We’ll just do it in reverse alphabetical order,” War suggested.

  “That’ll put me last,” Bryan cautioned.

  “Great. That means the game’s already his.” Dizzy filled the glasses. “No one can hold their liquor the way Bryan can.”

  “War you’re up,” King called, tapping a full shot glass. “Truth or dare?”

  “Dare.”

  King’s dark brow rose. “I dare you to share what you said about Avery Jones when she was here on the tour bus.”

  “You’re such an asshole, King,” War growled. “I’m out.” He shot to his feet. I intercepted a heated nonverbal exchange that passed between War and Bryan. “I got better things to do than play this idiotic game with you pissants. I’m going to the back.” He leaned in and gave me a tight lipped kiss.

  “I’ll come with you.” I started to rise.

  “That’s alright, babe. Stay. Come when you’ve had enough. Knowing these mother fuckers, that won’t be long.”

  I stuck my chin out. “I can hold my own.”

  “You sure can.” Sager’s head bobbed in agreement. “I’ll never forget that time you stood up to those cops when they hassled King about his brother.” He glanced at his best friend. “You remember, King?”

  “Oh yeah.” King nodded. “She told ‘em to piss off, we don’t get to pick our family.”

  “Just our amigos.” I held out my knuckles to King for a fist bump.

  “Ok.” Dizzy smiled. “You’re next, Sager, mi amigo.”

  “Alright, Diz.” Sager leaned back and stretched out his arms. “Give me a truth.”

  Dizzy ran a finger over his eyebrow piercing. “You really do the nasty with Mrs. Neboski on that science field trip to Lake City?”

  Sager gave a quick nod.

  “Hot damn!” Dizzy exclaimed. “I thought that was just urban legend.”

  Expressions ranging from disgust to admiration marked the individual band members’ faces as Sager pocketed his cash and knocked back a shot of vodka.

  Bryan refilled the shot glass. “You’re next, Lace.”

  I pulled the shot glass with the twenty underneath toward me.

  “Truth or Dare?” Bryan asked.

  Shit. This could be tricky. Bryan had a devilish glint in his eye that concerned me. “Truth…no dare,” I changed my mind nervous how far he might take things.

  “Hmm.” Bryan ran a finger slowly across his lips.

  My stomach did a little flip. I licked my dry lips as he continued to stare at me and perseverate. He was obviously enjoying making me squirm.

  “Kiss your brother…on the lips.” Bryan grinned.

  “No way!” I snorted.

  Dizzy shook his head. “That’s just sick, man.” He glared at Bryan. “I’m giving her my turn and she earns a modify since you went so far over the line.”

  “Agree,” Sager said, rubbing his chin. “Now she has to kiss you for forty bucks. You’re almost like a brother to her anyway. She’s already so pissed. I’d watch out. She might bite.”

  “Promise?” Bryan gave me a slow once over.

  My cheeks warmed. “I just might, you ass,” I warned as I crossed over to him, ignoring Dizzy who’d suddenly started shaking his head at me. I was surprised my brother didn’t have more faith in me. That forty dollars was already mine. I bent down to kiss Bryan. As soon as our lips touched, he took over and I forgot all about our audience.

  I shouldn’t have.

  “Lace.” War’s voice snapped my head up like a whip. “Come to bed.” His expression was furious.

  Blood roaring in my ears, I swiped my winnings off the table before hurrying after him.

  I shifted
in my bunk, scrolling up the volume again, trying to drown out the sound of Lace and War yelling at each other in the back.

  I knew that I shouldn’t have taken things so far with that kiss. But I wasn’t sure I gave a damn. I’d wanted to taste her again.

  I had a sudden terrible thought. What if War got physical with Lace? Not that I’d ever seen War hit a woman, but drugs could make you do irrational things.

  I pulled out my earbuds, listening intently.

  Just more shouting.

  But now that my imagination had gone there, I couldn’t rest until I saw for myself she was ok. I threw my legs over the side and started to climb down from my top roost.

  “Stay put.” Dizzy grabbed a hold of my leg before my foot even hit the floor. “Get the fuck back in bed. Haven’t you caused enough trouble for one night?”

  “I’m going to make sure he doesn’t hurt her,” I told him flatly.

  “He wouldn’t dare. Not with you standing by, ready to take her off his hands.” A pause. “Besides you know Lace can take care of herself.”

  I wasn’t so sure about that. I wasn’t sure about a lot of things anymore.

  “Why can’t you let it go?” Dizzy asked in a low voice.

  I didn’t answer. Dizzy would never understand. I’d never seen the dude have an emotional connection with any woman. He went through them at a faster clip than I ever had. Diz had the whole grab ‘em and bag ‘em thing down to an art form. It seemed like an obsession with him more than a game.

  Things had finally settled down back there. My tensed muscles began to loosen. But then I smelled something acrid burning.

  Fuck.

  They were shooting up again. I put my buds back in and blasted up the volume. I could certainly relate to Axl’s sarcastic introduction to “Estranged” from the live version. I squeezed my eyes tightly shut as Slash’s guitar solo began to wail in my ears.