Breaking the Limits

by Nichole, Stephanie

  Jovi hops into the front seat. I was so damn proud of him. Out of all of us he would be the one to get somewhere in life. He’s smart and knows how to use it. I notice that his school uniform looks a little small since his last growth spurt and make a mental note to take him shopping as soon as possible. After dropping Jovi off at school, I head into Inkredible. I have a big tattoo coming up today, at least a four-hour session so I might as well get ready for it.

  I’m slightly shocked to see Pierce sitting in the parking lot when I pull in. As I get out so does he. “Hey man! Haven’t seen you in a while,” I tell him, as I unlock the doors to the shop.

  “Yeah, I know, I’m sorry I’ve been super busy with work and Rocky. I thought maybe we could catch up.”

  “Sure, I don’t have an appointment for another hour,” I tell him, as I flip the switch to turn on the lights.

  He nods “Good. Oh, I brought you one of those Root Beer floats from Becky’s that you like so much.”

  I chuckle, “Thank man! I haven’t had one of these in forever.”

  “I figured. So, how’s life?” Pierce asks.

  When I turn around I note how hard he’s studying me and something about that makes me concerned. “Pretty good. I mean there’s a lot of adjusting going on since dad passed but the family shop, JamesTown and Inkredible are all doing pretty well. Jagger is supposed to be moving back today.”

  “Yeah?” I nod to answer his question, “How’s things with Kynlee?”

  I look up at him while setting up for the appointment. “Great. She had two auditions yesterday. She seemed a little down about the idea of not getting the one but the other one she felt pretty good about.”

  “Oh yeah, what kind of auditions?”

  I shrug slightly. “One for some new lingerie company and the other for a music video.” I hear Pierce sigh heavily and when I look up I notice him rubbing his hand over his face, “Pierce what’s going on?”

  “Just keep in mind that I might be wrong. Yesterday, Rocky got a call from Enzo asking who Kynlee’s agent was. Apparently, Royal Eternity are getting ready to shoot the video for the first single and from my understanding he wanted to request Kynlee.”

  The blood was pounding in my ears. This couldn’t be right. Kynlee would have told me that. I had asked her if I knew the band and she had said no. Kynlee had lied to me and we didn’t lie to one another.

  Chapter 15

  Ace

  Pierce left shortly before my appointment arrived. Barker was a biker guy who wanted to get work done on his back piece. It was massive and time consuming but I was relieved to have something else to focus on besides Kynlee. Throwing myself into my work was the best way to do that. However, after four hours I was irritable and tired which only made my mood with Kynlee darken further. Once Barker was out the door I shut the shop down for the day.

  As I drive back to my apartment I realize I’m still not ready to deal Kynlee. I don’t want to say something I’ll regret or make the situation worse, so instead of going home, I go for a long drive and sit in the sand on the beach for a while. Things that Connor had said are weighing on my mind a lot lately. What if he was right and Kynlee needed more? What if she needed me to tell her how I felt? What if she needed the label?

  The label isn’t so hard for me. Kynlee was my girlfriend, end of story but telling her how I felt was another story. How was I supposed to tell her when I couldn’t even say it to myself? Checking the time on my watch I see that Kynlee would be at work by now. Jagger was probably already in town too but I decide to go home and take a quick nap before pedal to the metal tonight.

  I ‘m asleep by the time my head hits the pillow between the four-hour tattoo and my emotional roller coaster concerning Kynlee, I’m drained. I wake up feeling slightly less tired but more than a little pissed off. The more I think about it the angrier I get about Kynlee lying to me. I don’t know why she did it and that is one of the biggest problems. Why lie about Royal Eternity and Enzo unless she has something to hide?

  She’ll be home within the next hour and I still wasn’t sure what to say or do. After taking a rushed shower I dress quickly and head out the door before Kynlee manages to get home. I meet up with Jaxx and Pierce at JamesTown before heading over to the races. Jagger had texted me that he’d see me tonight so at least that was something to look forward to. I was also looking forward to racing. Right now, I could really use that release of adrenaline. I needed something to take all of my focus off Kynlee. Racing has always been an outlet for me, a way to escape reality when it got to be too much. Right now, it was all too much.

  Aside from Axell, I had been the first one to really get into trouble. I had started rebelling at a young age and soon found myself racing long before I even had a license to do so. Something about racing calmed my mind and soul. The best way I could describe it was to say that in my day to day life I felt like I was drowning, but the moment I got behind the wheel and revved the engine it was like breaking through the surface and taking that first big gulp of much needed air. After my first race I had been hooked. As if the possibility of the money you could win wasn’t enough to make you risk your life I finally began to feel like I had found my escape.

  For me racing was like a drug. It was completely addictive. I couldn’t go too long without it. I started to get antsy and frustrated if I did. I guess that’s why every week I raced. People thought I did it for the attention or the reputation but in the end, it was neither. It was that feeling that settled over me that calm before the storm so to speak.

  The only other thing I had ever found addictive in life had been girls, but Kynlee had come along and changed that. No other girl could compare to her. It was like she had walked into my life and completely ruined every other girl for me. None of them could hold my attention the way she could, none of them gave me bullshit back the way I dished it out aside from Kynlee, none of them had ever even made me consider something more in life. No other girl had stayed the night with me, no other girl had seen me at my worst, and no other girl had chased my nightmares away. Hell, no one else had ever fought for me or believed in me the way Kynlee had.

  I think that’s why the lie pissed me off so bad and I think I’m hurt more than pissed off. I have put all my faith in her, all my trust, everything that I possibly could and it was almost like she was throwing it back in my face. I know that I couldn’t avoid her forever, but I just don’t know how to handle any of this.

  When I pull up to the races without Kynlee the uneasiness floods over me. It feels so wrong to arrive without her. I haven’t arrived at a race without Kynlee since the Tara fiasco. I spot Axell, Sadie, and Bowie as I get out of the car. I make my way over to them. Bowie wraps and arm around my neck trying to hold me in a head lock, “Jagger’s back.”

  “Yeah, he texted me. Is he here yet?” I ask.

  “Not yet but he will be I’m sure,” Sadie says. “Where’s Kynlee?”

  I’m not sure what to say so I just shrug. Stepping away I go back to my car thinking that I should go check my cell phone. I’m sure that Kynlee has tried to get in touch with me, but instead I rummage through my glove compartment. I find the pack of cigarettes I have stashed in there. I used to smoke but then I quit after watching dad suffer. Now I just dig one out every now and then when I feel unsettled. Normally, that was right before a really intense tattoo, but tonight I need one. As I inhale the smoke I feel my nerves go numb. Jovi comes up beside me and grabs one out of the pack. I’m about to protest but technically I’m still just his brother, Axell and Sadie have taken over the role of his parents so they can tell the kid no.

  I notice Jagger the minute he gets out of the car. He has that look on his face, the one he gets when he’s about to lecture you. He walks straight up and yanks the cigarette from Jovi’s mouth telling him, “I don’t think so.”

  I hold back a chuckle because I remember being in his shoes. Apparently, no one told Jovi about Jagger coming back because his eyes
go wide and with a tone full of surprise he asks, “Jagger?”

  Jagger pulls him in for a hug but as soon as he pulls away he tells Jovi, “I never want to see you smoke anything ever again, am I clear?” Jagger’s tone has an authoritative note to it so you know he means business.

  Glancing off to the side I see Kynlee approaching us. Her tiny black dress and over the knee black boots makes me groan inwardly. She looks amazing. I hear Jovi tell Jagger “Yeah, I just figured since Ace does…”

  Jagger looks me over. I’ve changed a lot since the last time he saw me. The piercings, tattoos, and eyeliner might take some getting used to for him. I study him back and notice he’s gotten even more muscle on his 6’4” frame than before and his no bull shit attitude could come across as intimidating. His chocolate brown hair is cut similar to mine. His amber eyes and square jaw make him look older that his twenty-five years though. I noticed a few new tattoos as well. "Yeah, well Ace was always a rebel without a cause," Jagger says, pulling me into a hug while yanking the cigarette from his mouth too.

  “Never without a cause, all for the ladies. Ladies love rebels,” I tell him with a wink. I don’t know why I feel the need to act like this right now. I only have one lady or at least I think I do. In the last moment I lean back over and whisper, “Good to see you. Welcome home.”

  Jagger tells me, “Thanks man.” Just as Kynlee comes sauntering up to us, I lean forward and kiss her cheek, but I can feel the unease coming off Kynlee. I motion toward Jagger “Kynlee, this is my older brother Jagger. Jagger this is my…friend Kynlee.”

  I know the instant I call Kynlee my friend I’ve messed up. I feel her tense and I see the look in Jagger’s eye. He’s about to call me out on it. “Nice to meet you Kynlee, although I’m not sure what you see in this brother of mine. Clearly, you can do better.”

  I knew it. I knew he was going to call me on it. Kynlee relaxes almost instantly so it makes being called out not as bad. At least she seems more comfortable now. Kynlee tosses her hair over her shoulder. It’s kind of a signature move for her. “I like you already,” she tells Jagger with that megawatt smile.

  I’m about to say something when Ryce Whitten pulls up in his canary yellow Porsche 911, but no one is looking at him or the car; it’s because the volume of his music is ridiculous. I drive with my music a little too loud too, but nothing like this. As Ryce gets out he smirks in Jagger’s direction because that’s just who Ryce is. He’s a trust fund baby with a cocky attitude because he knows no matter what he does his money will save his rich privileged ass. Instantly, my hand that’s not on Kynlee’s back balls into a fist. I’d like nothing more than to punch his perfect teeth for Jagger.

  The only reason Ryce has an issue with Jagger is because of Harlyn. It was common knowledge that Ryce had a thing for Harlyn, but she never had eyes for anyone besides Jagger. Add that to the fact that Jagger beat Ryce every time they raced…well there was a lot of bad blood there. It wasn’t really anyone’s fault but his own though. None of us can help it that he can’t race.

  I had seen Londynn earlier when she arrived with Farrah I was just waiting to see when Jagger would notice her. I had crossed paths with Londynn multiple times in the past because we were close to the same age. I had even kissed her once to try to pull Ryce’s head out of his ass and make him see what he had in front of him. Londynn was a beautiful, quiet girl, she was tall and lean from being a dancer for years. Her honey colored hair hung a little past her shoulders which only made her deep, hazel eyes stand out more. Londynn had been gone for the past three months and I knew for a fact that Ryce hadn’t been lonely. I had seen him filling his time with plenty of girls. Jagger notices Londynn just like I knew he would. Something about her makes it seem like she could use someone like Jagger in her life. Ryce grabs one of his fill ins, Regina something or other before he realizes that Londynn is here. I watch as the scene unfolds. Instinctively, I push Kynlee behind me a bit. Not sure what I’m protecting her from but just in case.

  Ryce speaks first when he notices Londynn. "Londynn, I didn't know you were back."

  Londynn crosses her arms over her chest and raises her nose in the air while she meets his eyes. "Well, I don't suppose you would since we haven't spoken in three months. You've clearly been...busy."

  Ryce takes a step toward her but she matches it by taking a step back. "Come on sweetie it's not like that."

  Londynn throws her hand up to stop him. "Save it Ryce. I used to believe you but not anymore."

  "Londynn, we need to talk," Ryce says, but his tone is a little ass like, almost as if she’s his child and he’s annoyed with her.

  Londynn shakes her head. "I think your tongue needs some rest." I almost want to clap for that line. Kynlee is gripping the back of my t-shirt. Londynn makes her way toward Farrah, Connor, Bowie, Axell, and Sadie are standing, just a few steps away from where Kynlee, Jovi and I are now.

  Ryce quickly closes the distance between them and yanks her arm, pulling her back toward him. "Don't walk away from me Londynn!" he yells at her and I see her flinch. That’s a big no in my book, hell in all of our books. My dad drilled us on how to respect a lady. I don’t care who the hell Ryce thinks he is, you don’t treat a female that way. The movement from the corner of my eye catches my attention and I see Jagger moving towards them.

  Turning around I look at Kynlee. “Stay here and make sure Jovi stays with you,” I tell her before pressing a kiss to the top of her head. I quickly fall into step behind Jagger with Bowie right behind me. I don’t just fight for the sake of fighting anymore but to defend a girl or back up one of my brother’s…well let’s just say I’m always down for that. Plus, I’d love to put this rich ass in his place.

  Ryce glares at Jagger over Londynn's head and I can hear her whispering she's sorry and to please let her go. Hearing Londynn's voice did it for Jagger, he clears his throat and says, "Let her go."

  "Keep your ass out of it Jagger or I'll hand it to you," he says, trying to sound threatening.

  Jagger chuckles. "That's funny Ryce because I can't remember you ever handing me my ass, but if you think you can then come on." Jagger motions for Ryce to come at him. "Let her go and show me what you got."

  "Forget this!" he says, pushing Londynn back with enough force to send her tall, lean body falling into Jagger’s chest. Luckily, my brother has quick reflexes and catches her just as Bowie steps around me and Jagger to punch Ryce square in the jaw knocking Ryce a few steps back. Instantly, Ryce's friends are around him ready to try to take us on but I hear footsteps behind us and I see Axell and Connor have also joined us. This could get bloody really quick but I notice Jagger whispering in Londynn’s ear. I notice Londynn nods and then Jagger guides her behind him. The minute she sees Farrah she quickly closes the distance between them

  Bowie and I are ready for a fight, but Jagger has a better idea apparently. Jagger steps forward, in front of Bowie which is dangerous in itself. Bowie is the one with hottest temper out of us James brothers. He used to be so calm but after Hollis left something inside him snapped. "I have a better idea. Instead of busting up that face of yours and your buddies, how about we settle this on the road. Pedal to the metal?" Jagger asks.

  Ryce spits out a mouthful of blood and glares back at us. "Pedal to the metal," he confirms, then turns to head back to his car.

  I turn around and head back toward Kynlee, slightly relieved that I’m not going to fight tonight with the exception of racing. With as raw as my emotions are right now I’m afraid I could do some major damage without even realizing it. As I head over to place my buy in for the race I catch Kynlee’s eyes. I see the worry and hurt there. She knows something is wrong, but I can also see her pleading, almost as if she’s asking if were okay and for the first time since we’ve been together I honestly don’t know.

  Chapter 16

  Kynlee

  I sent Kenndrix home shortly before the time that I figured Ace would get back, but he never showed u
p. I took as long as I could getting ready for work. I feel like there are weights on my feet. I’m slowly moving through the motions of the day without actually feeling anything. Anything but guilt that is. I still can’t figure out why I lied to Ace and I hate that. I want to see him to know that we’re okay. I send another text message to him as I lock up the apartment and head for my Jeep.

  Three calls, ten texts, and one voicemail and still no reply. I have a sinking feeling in my stomach that something is wrong. Something that I’m not sure I’ll be able to fix. I drive to work even though I don’t really remember the drive over. I must look as bad as I feel because every co-worker I pass asks me if I’m feeling okay.

  I wish I could say the day had gotten better from there but sadly it didn’t. This day was just one big mess. I pull my phone out of my pocket so many times that I ended up dropping my phone and cracking the screen. I messed up on a ton of orders and even dropped a set of those, sending food and pieces of broken plates across the floor. My manager called me in and while she could have written me up for all my mistakes, she was nice and just gave me a verbal warning and sent me home.

  My heart sank even further when I arrived back at the apartment and saw no sign of Ace’s car. I take a deep breath and decide that I can’t face going back into that apartment alone. Instead, I drive back out of the parking lot and take the fifteen-minute drive to my actual apartment. It’s not in the greatest part of town and I hardly spend any time there, but right now it sounds more inviting.