The Shadow's Touch

by Scott VanKirk

  They could heal from injuries just as I could. They surrounded me and took on other forms: eagle, snake, cougar, and bear. They attacked me together. No one of them was a match for my strength, but each time I brought one down, the others would attack from all corners of the world. The snake’s eyes mesmerized me even as its venom weakened me, the eagle blinded me and ripped my flesh, and the bear and the cougar savaged me. I fought back and healed myself. I would have prevailed but for the fifth remaining person, the Shaman.

  This one stood back and chanted sharp cutting words while the others attacked. His chanting interfered with my access to the power of the black totem. Others of his words stung and confused. Alone, they’d have been nuisances, but with the man-beast’s attacks, they were crippling. All too soon, I fell. I had only destroyed two of the beast-men before they severed my head, and my access to the power disappeared.

  I tried to escape, but the shaman used words that bound me. He kept me from leaving the dead flesh of my host. He took the world from me, and I returned to darkness. Nothing remained for me but the cold, merciless Hunger. It raged within me, and I grew weaker and weaker until I became as before—impotent, pathetic, with no power, locked within myself, and tortured by the Hunger I could no longer appease.

  Suddenly, there was Fire and power again. I grabbed the power and used it to take the Fire. Once again I perceived glorious form and space. I was now Erik Anthony Parmely. He had freed me from my imprisonment by breaking the skull that had bound me. In my quest for vengeance against that evil, demon-spawn-prick Morgenstern, I had also found a really cool carved snake. I hadn’t known what it was until now. It was the totem of one of the warriors responsible for caging me. With it, I was free again to feed the Hunger.

  As Erik, I didn’t feel the same struggle within myself as I sometimes had. Once I realized the power I once again held, I rejoiced. That part of Erik that still remained exulted with me and I found no reason to crush it. It reminded me of my pet dog Ralph. I had loved Ralph. Until my father had killed him.

  I remembered the beatings. Every time my father came home, I was always afraid. I tried not to make him angry for fear he might beat me to death. I wished I could leave like my mother, but he had told me how he had caught her and killed her for being unfaithful, and I was too afraid to try to escape.

  But, now, I wasn’t afraid. I was strong. I went to find vengeance and to feed. Then, I would search to reclaim my rightful totem and its power.

  New and Improved

  Now, I was Ian Finn Morgenstern, and I was stronger than I had ever been before. I had my totem, which I now called my caduceus. It didn’t matter what name it carried, I had it back, and I would feast like never before. In my fight to take control of the new me, I lost a little time and most of my anticipated meals-on-wheels had fled. Jen had pulled Dave back away from me and was busy mumbling something over him.

  Her mumblings didn’t worry me too much, because without the caduceus or one of the animal totems, she didn’t have much power. That’s when I heard the distinctive sound of the snake totem behind me. I recognized the danger and whirled around, ready to attack. It was Jim. He had retrieved the snake and was trying to figure out how it worked. Poor Jim, he wasn’t very well equipped to deal with the real world. I laughed at him.

  “Hey, Jim-bob, bet you never thought you’d be trying to play a magic flute to save your life, did you?”

  Jim’s eyes widened and he backed up as I advanced. I grinned and said, “It’s not much like clarinet, is it? Only two holes, but oh, so many songs!”

  Jim fled the restaurant. I followed him out. I wanted that snake totem back. Once outside, he put a car between us, trying to buy himself some time. I laughed again and jumped up on the car’s hood and from there onto the roof.

  I sneered down at him. “Oops! Didn’t think of that one, did you? Come on buddy, can’t you spare a meal for your old friend?” I laughed again. I loved my new sense of humor.

  Jim ran across the road. I gave chase. I guess I was pretty intent on him because I never even saw the car. There was a squeal, a flash of pain, and suddenly I was flying through the air. I tried to break my fall, but didn’t succeed. I landed hard and I found myself wishing I’d studied harder at Judo. I rolled several times and found myself on my back with several broken bones and a ton of painful road rash. Damn, that hurt.

  The woman who had been driving the car soon leaned over me and asked frantically if I was all right. I would be. I pulled the power through Finn’s, now my, soul and used it to knit my bones and heal my wounds. I couldn’t get it all, but it was enough.

  Meanwhile, Jim was on the other side of the road, trying to warn the woman to get away from me. I couldn’t have that, so I reached up and grabbed her blouse. The healing had made me ravenous, and here was a gourmet feast. A new thought occurred to me then.

  Indiscriminate feeding wasn’t the best of my options in my new world. This would bring about the inconvenience of the police. Instinctively, I knew they could bring me down with their numbers and their guns, even with my new powers. But, I was hungry. I didn’t know if I could resist the Hunger so soon after the effort it took NOT to eat my host.

  Something new occurred to me. Could I feed without killing? I had been doing tricks with souls recently, so maybe I could just cut off small pieces? I tried it with the woman bending over me and got equivocal results. I was able to feed easily at first, but as I pulled deeper, it became harder and harder. I used the power from the caduceus to pull harder, but the woman started screaming louder and louder in my ear. She was wailing something awful, which was very annoying. You’d think I was killing her or something. Well, to be fair, I guess I was.

  I pushed the woman away and concentrated on the last of my healing. The little shot from the woman’s spirit let me squeeze a bit more out of my body’s old soul. It was a strong one, and I could pull power from that caduceus like nobody’s business. I used it to heal myself. Then, suddenly a new plan sprang into my mind. If I didn’t do anything to hurt anyone, the police couldn’t touch me. None of those imbeciles would even be able to see anything was different. It was time to implement operation “hapless snorg.”

  I started planning what I’d say to the police: Who, me? I’m just a poor little high school student who just lost my best friend…

  I stopped my ruminations. There would be time for that later. Now I needed to deal with the nice lady who ran me over. I picked myself up and went to where she lay crying on the road. I picked her up, gentle as could be, and tried to calm her fears.

  “There, there, what happened? Are you alright? Did you have a heart attack or a stroke or something? Perhaps I can get you some water?”

  Even though, to my new ears, I sounded like a cheesy villain putting on a phony act, I soon had her sitting on the side of the road, recovering. I assured her that I was alright—merely bruised and perhaps a little shaken.

  This was very, very hard. I was proud of myself for not eating her on the spot. It was time to find some dinner—somewhere nice and private. I thought again about eating without killing, but rejected it. It was easier just to kill and then feast. The other way felt too much like dieting. I hated dieting.

  I walked away from the accident and saw Jim on the other side of the street, watching me warily.

  An idea struck me.

  “It’s all right, Jim! That hit from the car broke the shadow’s hold over me. I have it under control now. Sorry if I scared you, bud. I scared myself, too. Those things are nasty!”

  This was going to be so easy! All I had to do was get rid of Jen and no one would ever know my secret. It was amusing to think of myself prowling the dark streets of the city as the boogeyman every kid was afraid of and no adult believed in. I wished I’d thought of this before.

  Unfortunately, I really needed to feed the sucking black void at my core. The Hunger was growing stronger. It was a horrifying thing really, but I had lived with it for longer than forever. That didn’t make i
t less horrible, just easier to handle. The Hunger was throbbing through me—burning me with its cold. If I didn’t eat soon, I would lose control, and then my plan would disintegrate. I considered my options. If I killed and ate the people left at Frankies, I’d be the prime suspect. I had to go elsewhere. I reached for my keys and internally thanked my mother again for letting me borrow her car.

  I had parked just down the block, so I quickly got to the car, but before I could go anywhere, the door to Frankies burst open and Dave the Bear came charging out. Crap! I so didn’t need this. I started running. I’d made it a few feet when about two tons of angry bear landed on me. His weight squashed me flat and couldn’t move. I decided I was fortunate that Dave considered me his friend. Otherwise, he might have done some real damage. I tried the trick that another shadow had used on Anderson and the others. It had worked so well on Dave before, when I was Erik.

  I formed a black pseudopod on my back and shot it up through Dave the Bear’s head. It worked beautifully. Dave reared up and off of me. As a side bonus, I got a little taste of Dave as well. Yum. I got up and made it to my car, looking back frequently at Dave the Bear shaking his head.

  When I turned, I saw Jen on the sidewalk looking at me, too. She was throwing words at me. They formed a sort of cant that seemed to counterpoint the pulsing beat of the caduceus. I could feel the chant catch me up in its soothing beat.

  Uh-oh, I recognized this from before. I had to get out of here. If I succumbed here, it could ruin everything. I fumbled my keys out and discovered Dave’s fat butt had crushed the fob. Damn! Mom was going to kill me. I had to use the key to open the door while I fought against whatever Jen was doing to me. I made it in, started the car, and made my getaway. It felt good to be free of those people.

  As I thought about it, it was just good to be free, period. I don’t know how I had ever put up with all the mewling doubt and guilt. Even the hunger was better than that.

  My first thought was to head home, but I started thinking about what I would have to face there. If I ate my mom, it would bring big trouble. I doubted there was much left of my dad to eat. I tried to think about where to go. There was still about an hour of the long summer day left. I drove around for a while, trying to think through my options, while trying to ignore the screaming demands of the Hunger. Part of me was horrified by its pitiless savagery, but that seemed to happen with every new body I took. The horror, if not the hunger, would ease with time.

  Perhaps I should return to Frankies. No, that was a dumb idea. I needed a bigger town like Detroit or Chicago. Columbus would do for a while. I was turning around to do just that when another thought hit me. If I just took off with my mother’s car, the police would find me and drag me home, so that wasn’t a great idea. But, right now, I had more important things to think about. The Hunger was growing. Soon I wouldn’t be able to deny it. I would eventually fail my saving throw and feed on Finn’s soul. That would suck big time. Who knows how long it would take to get a new body after that. Plus, there was every chance I would lose the caduceus. I couldn’t take that chance. Besides, I liked being Finn. He was so full of juicy power.

  I suddenly thought about Shady Oaks. Without further thought, and with a smile on my face, I set my course. To pass the time and distract myself from the Hunger, I used the power available to me now to start enhancing my body. I set about reinforcing my bones first. Long ago, I had learned to do bones first through a series of very painful lessons. Super muscles needed super bones. I’d have to work on both for a few months to get to where I could toss that stupid bear around, but I wasn’t doing anything else at the moment. I needed to be judicious in the use of my power, because I found that the more I enhanced my body, the more errors started coming up. I wondered if it was just the use of the power that caused the warping, or if perhaps the accelerated tissue growth caused DNA replication errors. These new ideas would bear thinking about. Damn, I was hungry!

  I felt I was missing something, but I couldn’t think what it was. As I drove, I started exploring my new home, hoping to jar my brain into remembering what I was forgetting. I wasn’t in great shape, but I had been working out recently. Happily, I wouldn’t have to do that anymore. I decided the Krav Maga lessons with Uncle Mark could be useful. I’d have to continue those.

  I examined Finn’s soul. It was still in pretty good shape. The thought of eating it inflamed a desire that took that familiar monumental effort to deny. I’d discovered that with the caduceus, I was better off resisting nibbling on my host. The stronger the soul, the more power I could pull through it. As I took stock of my shiny new toy and admired its juicy power, I noticed that its shape was a little odd. I examined it a bit more closely. There was a big chunk missing!

  I knew immediately what must have happened. I had given part of it to Holly and that stupid turd Daniel had taken another big bite out of it! Well, the first thing I was going to do would be to get it back, and then have a feast. That struck me as very efficient: two birds and all that.

  I headed off to Shady Oaks. Along the way, I started to ponder just what the nature of the Hunger was. It was like a cold, black hole for souls. How could something like that become tied to me, to my existence? I knew so much more about the world now. I knew about physics and chemistry and had answers to thousands of questions, most of which I had never thought to ask. That opened up an entire new range of possibilities. Perhaps I could study the Hunger and learn how to cap it as you might an oil well. Perhaps I could figure out a way to get rid of it all together. These were heady thoughts indeed. Freedom. I really liked the taste of that word. But, until that day, there was eatin’ to be done.

  I arrived at Shady Oaks, parked the car, and walked down the front path, the same as I had done many times before. It felt different this time. I stopped and tried to put my finger on it. The manicured park-like quality of the grounds was …different somehow. Then it came to me: it now felt like a huge buffet awaited me inside.

  For the first time, I was happy to be here, eager to go inside. Another happy thought occurred to me: Dr. Anderson would be there! I would seriously enjoy killing and eating that creepy, sanctimonious, pomp-bottom twit. There were also other pieces of me here I could reclaim. That would make me even stronger. I basked in my cleverness and headed to find Daniel.

  It turns out I didn’t have to look for long. Daniel and Holly were waiting for me in the common room. Sure enough, they were both glowing brightly with my soul mixed with their own. Happily, it looked like they had taken good care of it. It pleased me to see each had grown a little bit stronger on their own. The more I stoked Finn’s Fire, the more power I would be able to pull through it. Perhaps, eventually, I wouldn’t even have to be afraid of the police.

  Daniel looked grim, and Holly looked like she was crying. I hated to see that. It made me feel bad.

  I didn’t want to think about Holly, so I walked up to Daniel. I held out my arms and said, “Daniel, it’s so good to see you up and around! Come give me a hug!”

  “You cannot have him,” said Daniel, not moving.

  Didn’t take a genius to figure out whom he was talking about. “Of course I can! I already do have me. There are just a few missing bits, and I want them back.”

  “Finn gave me freedom from the shadow that had ridden me. He took away the nightmares and then came back and healed me with his own soul. He gave me a new chance at life. There is nothing I would not do for him. You cannot have him.”

  To help me ignore the twinges his words caused in me, I grinned and said, “Good, just stand still. This won’t take but a moment.” Sometimes I crack myself up.

  I approached him and put my hands out to him. He looked terrified, but he didn’t flinch. It was strange to have him just stand there ready for the harvesting. Kind of unsettling, really. It seemed like it must be a trap, but how could it be? I was the only person on the planet who could hurt me, and I certainly wasn’t the self-destructive type. Still…

  I asked, “If you�
��re so keen on stopping me, why are you just offering yourself up to me?”

  “Because God protects the innocent, Devil. He won’t allow me to fail. He will guide me in slaying you and freeing Finn.”

  I tried to laugh, but his intensity was eerie. Holly stood next to Daniel, grasping his hand and trying, unsuccessfully, to hold back her tears.

  “And my dear little Holly. Why are you here?”

  Her lips trembled, and she said, “Because I love you, Finn. I want to be with you. If you’ve been eaten by the black thing, I want it to eat me, too.”

  Memories of my time with Holly came flooding back, and I realized what a close bond I had with her. I remembered how peaceful and contented I felt in her presence. Wow, I was a total sap. I tried to stuff those memories back into the dark where they belonged.

  I said to Holly, “You’ll get your wish, dear child. Just wait till I deal with Daniel.”

  I put my hands nervously on Daniel’s shoulders. Images and feelings of my time with Holly kept popping up. I should just get this over with and break his neck, but there was that whole legal thing. But Holly.… No, I would not think about her! I extended myself and tasted Daniel’s aura, his soul, as Finn called it. It tasted like Finn with a mix of other flavors. It was delicious. All the while Daniel looked into my eyes—afraid but unmoving.

  I asked Daniel, “I don’t suppose you would be willing to close your eyes?”

  He stared at me mutely. I started squirming. This was awkward and I hate awkward. I told myself that I was actually taking back what belonged to me. After all, if he hadn’t started pulling on me so greedily when I tried to help him, I wouldn’t have had to cut off such a large chunk of my soul. He was just a selfish bastard who deserved to die. Still he looked at me. Damn it! He and Holly were my wards. They were my responsibility to keep safe.