Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon?, Vol. 6

by Fujino Omori

  Looking at how people react to her now, I don’t blame her for staying up in the tower.

  “—”

  That’s when her silver gaze falls upon me.

  She stops walking and turns in my direction…and smiles.

  Ker-tap, ker-tap. The heels on her shoes echo as she approaches. Everyone in her path makes way, backing out as if pushed by some unseen force. Lady Hestia stops struggling for a moment and watches the silver-haired goddess and her massive attendant walk right up to us.

  “So you’re here, Hestia. Hephaistos as well. First time since Denatus, I believe?”

  “…Freya, what are you doing here?”

  Lady Hestia lets go of me and squares her shoulders directly in front of Lady Freya the moment the other goddess extends a friendly greeting.

  “I’m glad to see you are looking well,” says Lady Hephaistos next to my goddess. Lady Hestia looks like she’s trying to hold back a torrent with a cork.

  “I merely came to say hello. It’s a rare chance to see so many familiar faces at once, so how could I not make my way here?”

  The words roll off Lady Freya’s tongue as she glances toward the small mob of male gods that have assembled around her.

  All of them seem to melt as her silver eyes pass by. Lord Hermes is weak-kneed, a dumbstruck look on his face. Lord Takemikazuchi is blushing a light shade of pink and clears his throat with an “ahem.” Lord Miach bows and compliments her by saying, “You are quite beautiful this evening.”

  Not a heartbeat later, the heels of the expensive shoes that belong to their female followers find their way to the toes of the male deities. “Gah?!” “Uwoh?!” “Nuah?!” come their yelps of pain. I take a step back.

  Once again, her silver eyes alight on me.

  Air leaks out of my mouth as those silver spheres draw me in. Lady Freya’s cheeks pull back into an even deeper smile.

  She leans forward, extending her arm, and strokes the side of my face.

  “—Tonight, will you make a dream of mine come true?”

  “—Dream on!” Lady Hestia roars at Lady Freya right in front of me. She slaps Lady Freya’s hand away, her eyes burning with rage. “What are you getting excited for, Bell?!”

  “S-s-sorry!”

  “Listen up! That goddess is nothing more than a dragon that devours every man within reach! A rabbit like you wouldn’t last two seconds!”

  “Yes…!!”

  The goddess is overwhelming. My body shrinks away from her without even thinking. It’s almost like she’s unleashing round after round of Swift-Strike Magic, forcing me back.

  Her twin ponytails are sweeping out behind her like they’re trying to express just how dangerous the other goddess truly is.

  But Lady Freya is laughing to herself. “My, my, how disappointing.”

  I think she’s enjoying my goddess’s reaction…Then she steps away and says, “I seem to have upset Hestia, so I’ll take my leave. Until next time.”

  She turns her back on the still-infuriated Lady Hestia. “Ottar,” she calls to the animal person beside her and starts walking. I stand in awe of her follower—a boar man standing more than two meders tall—as the two of them make their way into the crowd. I watch them go, my eyes following the fluid motions of Lady Freya’s hips.

  My body cools down the farther away she gets. Finally, the last lock of her silver hair disappears.

  “—Not here two seconds, and that vixen’s already showin’ me up.”

  The storm has passed. A new voice cuts through the calm.

  It’s coming from the other direction.

  It catches me off guard. I spin around and—receive the biggest surprise of the night.

  “Loki?!”

  “Yo! Itty-Bitty! See ya learned how t’wear a dress. You’re actin’ so grown-up, I could bust a gut!”

  Lady Hestia yells at a goddess with vermilion red hair who’s dressed in a man’s suit.

  And standing beside her…

  A radiant girl with blond hair and golden eyes, wearing an elegant dress.

  “…?!”

  My eyes go wide and my face burns.

  Her dress a light green, Aiz looks slightly embarrassed standing just a little ways in front of me.

  “Just when did you get here?! You’re not the type to sneak in!” demands Lady Hestia.

  “Shut up, idiot!! Two floppin’ boobies stole my entrance, got that?!”

  It sounds like Aiz and her goddess Loki only just arrived. Everyone was so preoccupied with Lady Freya that no one noticed.

  Lady Loki is in a sharp man’s suit, and Aiz wears a form-fitting dress. It almost looks like some high-ranking nobleman’s daughter with her bodyguard, which is the complete opposite of reality.

  My body feels hot again, but it’s not going away this time.

  I can’t take my eyes off her. A princess from one of my old picture books has come to life in front of my very eyes.

  Her pale green dress is open in the front and in the back, completely exposing her delicate, feminine shoulders. Sparkling beads and various other decorations are sown in as accents in several places on the dress. I have no doubt that her goddess was in charge of the design and Lady Loki had no problem spending a large amount of money to show her affection for Aiz. The finishing touch is the long, silky gloves that extend all the way past her elbows.

  Part of her golden hair is tied with a ribbon behind her head. The rest of it is flowing gracefully down her back.

  Her angelic face and thin neck, supple breasts making just the right amount of cleavage, thin waist and fluttering dress…

  This is not the adventurer, the knight Aiz Wallenstein that I know.

  The heat overtaking me right now is different from before—my heart didn’t sing when I was taken in by Lady Freya.

  My body is throbbing, refusing to move.

  “Ah…”

  “…!”

  Aiz lifts her face and we make eye contact. Neither of us can say a word.

  I feel my face blush as she quickly looks to the floor, her hands together in front of her stomach as her shoulders lightly twitch up and down.

  Shff, her body swishes back and forth under Lady Loki’s shadow.

  S-so cute…!

  “…Ehh?”

  “Ouch?!”

  My goddess buries the toe of her shoe deep into the side of my shin. Is it that obvious how I’m feeling? Does my face betray me?

  “Ohh, so this is Itty-Bitty’s kid…”

  I grab my leg and fight back the tears when suddenly I feel Lady Loki’s eyes on me.

  Her vermilion eyes carve right through me. Every single muscle in my mouth and throat tenses up. She doesn’t even blink. Is that a hint of annoyance? Well, whatever it is, it’s making me uncomfortable.

  After a few moments…

  “Nah, this kiddo does nothin’ for me. My Aiz is so much better it’s like comparin’ heaven ’n’ earth!”

  Her words crack like a whip.

  I know that Aiz is out of my league, but that hurts a lot.

  I almost lose my balance, feeling light-headed, when I catch a glimpse of my goddess’s face. Her cheeks are trembling.

  Suddenly, she turns to face Lady Loki head-on.

  “Just like before, you know you can’t win in an argument, so you have to brag about your child this time?! So predictable, it’s painful to watch!”

  “—Oh yeah?!” A vein suddenly pops out of Lady Loki’s head.

  “Anyone can see that my Bell is much cuter than your Wallensomething! So charming, just like an adorable little rabbit!!”

  “Ya hit yer head, moron?! My Aiz is a hundred times cooler than that puny bunny!!”

  An angry bragging contest breaks out.

  The two goddesses trade verbal blows with reckless abandon. Lady Hephaistos sighs to herself, whispering, “Here we go again…” Lord Miach has an empty smile on his face. Nahza and the rest just watch, their mouths slightly open.

  As for me, I’m a
bsolutely horrified. They hate each other. All of the warmth in my body suddenly fizzles out, plunging me into despair.

  The insurmountable barrier between men and women in different Familias…There can be no better example than this.

  The two of them are practically growling at each other, and other deities are starting to take notice. “Hey, look, it’s round two!” “Now this is entertainment.” “Check that out.” Gods and goddesses are gathering around us. Aiz and I have reached our limit. Both of us step forward and try to calm our goddesses down.

  Both of them are breathing heavily, eyes filled with flames of rage. Luckily, Lord Hermes steps in and we finally get them under control.

  “…Humph. Itty-Bitty just spoiled my good mood!”

  “That’s my line!!”

  “Ohh? Aiz, we’re leaving!”

  “Bell, so are we!”

  Lady Loki grabs Aiz’s wrist as Lady Hestia takes hold of my hand. Both goddesses storm off in different directions, pulling us with them.

  I take a quick look over my shoulder. Aiz is looking back at me. Our eyes meet for a brief moment.

  If only I’d said something, if only I’d heard her voice…As I watch her get farther and farther away, I can’t help but feel I’ve lost my chance.

  How pathetic. I have neither the guts to break away from the goddess’s grasp, nor the courage to approach Lady Loki. Aiz turns away, her delicate shoulder blades flashing for a moment from beneath her hair. She’s so distant now—is this how things are going to be from now on? Once again, reality has made itself clear. The amount of time I was able to spend that close to her on the eighteenth floor was really special.

  More and more people are gathering around Lady Loki every second. Finally, I tear my eyes away from her as the painful reality of my mediocrity sinks in.

  I give up hope of getting a chance to speak with her and join my goddess as she moves to another side of the ballroom.

  After that, Lady Hestia introduced me to her divine friends and acquaintances as we walked several circuits around the party. It’s not easy to introduce yourself to a god, but somehow I’m able to overcome my nerves and string words together.

  Two hours have passed since we arrived at the party, and I need a break.

  I move away from the group of people, alone, find a quiet spot, and lean against the wall to avoid bothering anyone.

  “Whew…” A tired sigh escapes my lips.

  I’m absolutely exhausted.

  I take a look out over the party. The bright chandeliers hanging from the ceiling light everything up like a work of art.

  The attendants are hard at work carrying even more extravagant food out to the tables and passing out richly colored wine. Elegant music starts to play, but I can’t tell where it’s coming from. Almost as if on cue, the middle of the ballroom floor opens up for dancers, but I can still see Lady Hestia and Lady Loki arguing in the other corner of the room.

  It still feels weird being here…

  I can’t help but feel that way watching these beautiful men and women partner up and start dancing.

  This is a sparkling world of beauty and status. Completely different from the world I was in yesterday.

  Maybe it’s because I’m alone, but I feel more and more like I don’t belong, like I’m sticking out. The unfamiliar environment keeps me feeling uneasy.

  It’s pretty close to how I felt when I first started crawling the Dungeon.

  If I have a few more chances like this in the future, maybe I’ll get used to this world, too.

  But I can’t picture that happening.

  “…”

  I leave my spot against the wall and try to find an escape.

  I don’t have to walk far. One of the tall windows was left open and I step outside.

  Cool air envelops me the moment my foot hits the cement balcony.

  A starry night opens up above my head. I take a look around the black abyss and see a faint glow coming from the closest Main Street. A soft breeze tickles my skin.

  All of the stress and tension that had built up start to melt as I take a few breaths of fresh air.

  My mind is clear.

  “…?”

  I walk out to the ornately carved hand railing and hear some strange sounds coming from below.

  Looking out over the green lawn decorated with a fountain and many trees, my eyes find two human-looking figures.

  Isn’t that…?

  This must be a garden of sorts, and probably part of the building itself. The edge of the property is lined with tall trees, enough to remind me of a wooded area. There, in a dark spot where the lights from the Celebration can’t reach—

  The handsome man from Hibachitei, the one who beat me so easily…Hyacinthus and a man I’ve never seen before are talking.

  What are they doing out here…?

  “Tomorrow morning at the earliest…According to plan…We will handle the timing…Is that clear, Zanis?”

  “Yes…About the money…”

  I can’t make out all of their words. My body moves on its own.

  Concentrating with all of my might, I focus my ears—enhanced by my Status—on their conversation.

  They’re quite a ways from the balcony, but I can also make out their lip movements. With that, plus snippets of their voices, I get a general idea what they’re talking about.

  Zanis…?

  That must be the name of whoever Hyacinthus is talking to.

  I know it’s not nice to eavesdrop, but I lean a little farther off the balcony.

  When suddenly, shff, Hyacinthus and the other man look my way. I instantly freeze as I watch their eyes scan all the balconies on the side of the building.

  “Bell?”

  “!”

  A voice comes from behind me and I spin to face it.

  Lord Hermes is standing next to the window that leads to the balcony. The Celebration is still in full swing behind him. I look over my shoulder back to where the two men were just a moment ago.

  Hyacinthus and the man are nowhere to be seen.

  “What are you doing out here?”

  “Ah…Nothing really.”

  Lord Hermes walks out to meet me at the hand railing.

  I was eavesdropping, but I can’t exactly say that to him. I wish I could’ve heard more of their conversation, and I try my best to reassure myself that it was nothing important.

  “…Oh well, it doesn’t matter. Here, drink up.”

  “Th-thank you…”

  Lord Hermes has one glass in each hand and holds one of them out in front of me. I take it and thank him.

  Only once I get it to my lips do I realize it’s just water. Honestly, I didn’t want any more wine, so I’m grateful.

  I look at Lord Hermes with questioning eyes, as if to say why are you out here? He takes a swig of the wine in his own glass and grins at me.

  “We never did have a chance to chat. Sorry I’m not one of those cute girls inside, but may I join you?”

  His joke makes me smile and I nod at him. “Of course.”

  I quickly fix my posture and meet Lord Hermes in the center of the balcony.

  “You and Hestia just keep making progress. I’ve known who you are for a while now, but after seeing what you can do on the eighteenth floor, you can count me as one of your fans.”

  “I-I’m not that great…”

  Seeing Lord Hermes come out here was a little scary at first, but there’s something about his friendly smile that eases the tension in my shoulders. He compliments, teases, and jokes as the two of us get settled. Lord Hermes is by far the best oral tactician I’ve ever met.

  Muffled but beautiful music makes its way from the ballroom’s dance floor through the window in front of us. The gorgeous tones fill my ears as Lord Hermes and I start talking like friends.

  “Say, Bell. Why did you become an adventurer?”

  Lord Hermes leans against the hand railing as he asks me the question.

  The muscles in
my mouth tighten up. What am I supposed to tell him? “I came to meet the girl of my dreams in the Dungeon!” “I couldn’t give up my childhood dream of becoming a hero!” It’s getting embarrassing, repeating the same answer over and over.

  I scratch my head and think about it for a moment before finally making up my mind.

  “My grandfather…The man who raised me said this before he passed away…‘Orario has everything you could ever want. If you wanna go, go.’”

  “Oh?”

  “Orario has money and, um, I could meet lots of cute girls, fulfill any dream…He told me that joining a beautiful goddess’s Familia and being part of a big family was more than just a possibility.”

  “—Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!”

  Lord Hermes tilts his chin toward the night sky and laughs from deep within his belly.

  I look at the red-faced deity who’s clutching his stomach and doing his best to calm down.

  “‘You can be a hero. Go, if your will is strong enough.’…Those were his words,” I say.

  It wasn’t a demand; it was up to me to decide.

  I was still very young, but I clearly remember Gramps saying all of that only once.

  That’s the reason I came to Orario. That’s why I wanted to be an adventurer.

  After my grandfather’s death, I thought about everything he’d ever said. It didn’t take me long to make my choice.

  I wanted the warmth of a family.

  The one thing I craved ever since childhood—and reinforced by my bond with Gramps—was to meet the person who would make that dream come true.

  So I came to Orario, my soul filled with visions of becoming a hero.

  Even as I talk with Lord Hermes, flashes of the life I once knew bubble up to the surface of my memory. I look at the floor of the balcony and relive every single one of them.

  “…Your grandfather sounds like he was very amusing.”

  “Yes, he was. He made every day entertaining.”

  I try to stifle the grin on my lips. The word “amusing” describes my grandfather so well that I just can’t help it.

  Lord Hermes looks at me like he’s going to flash yet another smile. Bringing the wineglass up to his lips, he tilts his head back and downs the rest.

  “So then, you spent your entire life in the town where you were born until you came to Orario?”