A KISS FOR A KISS

by Hunting, Helena

  A group of us gets together once a month for a card night. I stay up way too late, drink too much beer, and usually sleep until noon the next day. It’s been a thing since I moved to Seattle and took the GM position.

  In that group are some of my buddies who work in NHL upper management, Bill, the team physician, and Alex. Occasionally, Rook joins us, and tonight happens to be one of those nights. He’s also bringing along Bishop, who’s decided to grace us with his presence. Bishop has never attended poker night before, so this should be interesting, if nothing else.

  Alex, Rook, and Bishop show up first, which isn’t unexpected. Alex brings a bottle of scotch, and he cracks it open while I pull lowball glasses from the cupboard.

  Rook holds out his hand to stop me from pouring three fingers into the third glass. “You mind if I make myself a coffee first? Otherwise I’m going to be passed out before the game even starts.”

  Bishop makes a noise that sounds like a snort and a scoff. “Nice opening line, dude. If you spend the night bitching about how much your wife wants to fondle your crown jewels, I’m switching your body wash for Nair.”

  Alex laughs. “This sounds like a story I want to hear.”

  Rook gives Bishop the side-eye. “Lainey’s ovulating, so I’m basically her personal joystick for the next few days.”

  “Rough life.” Alex snickers into his glass.

  “He’s trying to lowkey brag about all the sex he’s having.” Bishop rolls his eyes.

  “I’m not bragging, asshole. I’m more than happy to take care of my wife’s needs, but she’s a little hardcore right now about it because it took more than half a decade to give Kody a sister and she’s determined to make sure Aspen isn’t out of diapers before we have the next one.”

  “Makes sense to me,” Alex says.

  “Same.” Rook nods. “But being married to a woman with three master’s degrees and a PhD, one of them in mammal reproduction, means she can get a little intense about the timing. I took care of her before bed, and she went and set her alarm for three in the morning because that was apparently the optimal time. Which is fine. But Kody was up at five wanting to shoot the puck around and then Aspen was up half an hour later.”

  “Kody’s already on the practice schedule.” I don’t bother to hide my grin.

  “That kid was born to play hockey,” Bishop agrees. “He’s got a mean slap shot. I gave him a regular puck last week and he nearly broke my damn kneecap with it.”

  “That’s why we only give him the soft pucks.” Rook puts one of the pods into the coffee machine. “Normally, I’d just send him back to his room, but the last time I did that he managed to put a hole in the drywall because he used the outdoor pucks instead of the indoor ones.”

  “Must have been a hell of a shot,” Alex says with a laugh.

  “Right? He nicked the bar and it ricocheted. I thought it was funny, but Kody got upset because the hole was in the Alaska mural and it went right through a bear or a moose. He felt bad, and I had to reassure him that he didn’t actually hurt an animal. Anyway, I’m figuring it’s easier now when we’re already used to the sleep deprivation. So I’m really hoping it doesn’t take another half a decade to knock my wife up again.”

  “Half a decade doesn’t seem like much compared to this guy’s quarter of a century.” Bishop thumbs over his shoulder at me, half-hiding his smile behind his beer.

  “Couldn’t resist, huh?” I arch a brow.

  “You’re gonna have a teenager when you’re sixty. Better hope that kid likes the oldies,” Bishop deadpans.

  Alex makes a face. “I never even thought about that.”

  “Me either,” Rook says.

  “Anyway.” Alex turns back to Rook. “Back to your stressful life having to deal with your wife’s sexual demands. Maybe you should take Lainey away for a weekend or something.”

  Rook dumps half a bag of sugar into his coffee. “She’s been talking about this museum in North Dakota she wants to check out. Maybe I should take her there. Lainey’s mom is always happy to watch the baby, but with Kody’s hockey schedule it can be a lot.”

  “Kody can come stay with us for the weekend,” Alex offers. “You know he’s always welcome at our place.”

  “At least until he’s a teenager,” Bishop adds his two cents. “Then you’ll need to keep him away from your daughter.”

  “Oh, come on, they’re kids.” Rook raises a brow.

  “Until they’re teenagers and then boom. Hormones.” Bishop motions to his junk.

  Rook ignores him and stirs his coffee. “Anyway, hopefully I can plan it for next month. As long as games don’t conflict with the ovulation cycle or whatever.”

  “I basically looked at Violet and she was pregnant, so I can’t say I know what you’re going through, but we’re always here if you need to complain about how hard it is to have sex on demand.” He makes a circle motion with his finger, including Bishop and me in the we.

  “Uh, no, man, you can’t complain to me about this. If Stevie wants to set an alarm for three in the morning to wake the beast, I’m gonna let her, every damn time.”

  Rook slurps his coffee and gives Bishop the evil eye over the rim. “I’m not complaining. I’m just saying, setting an alarm for three in the morning is not the best for a good night’s sleep, especially when we already have a baby who wakes up in the middle of the night for feedings.”

  “This is not a conversation I ever thought I’d be having in my kitchen.” I sip my scotch.

  “You’re basically a bystander. And man, having to get up at ass o’clock in the morning for diaper changes and feedings at your age is going to suck.” Rook chuckles.

  “I’m in my forties, not filing for my old age pension.”

  Rook gives me a look. “When was the last time you got less than six hours of sleep?”

  “Probably last week.” Although I can’t be sure of that. Hanna goes to bed pretty early these days, and I usually join her, regardless of what time it is.

  “Well, enjoy it while it lasts, because once that baby is born, you can kiss those six hours goodbye. I wonder how King is going to deal with it when he and Queenie start having kids? That guy is a solid seven and always has been.”

  “He’ll survive. They should probably think about getting a dog, though, as training. Knowing King, he’ll have it crate and night trained in like three weeks. I’ve never met anyone as regimented as he is.” Alex rolls his glass between his hands. “That’d be pretty damn crazy, wouldn’t it? If you and Hanna have a kid and King and Queenie ended up having one, too?”

  “They just got married.” I take another gulp of my scotch. Although the thought has definitely crossed my mind, considering the number of times Queenie has talked about wanting to start a family recently. I can’t say it would be the worst thing if she and King decided to start their own family, even if the level of strange is high.

  “You’re not even married and you’re having a baby,” Alex points out.

  “I’m aware, thanks.” I give him the hairy eyeball.

  “You know we all kind of called this a while ago.” Rook takes another slurp of coffee.

  “Called what?”

  “This thing with you and Hanna. I mean, I’ll be honest, I never really picked up on it, but Lainey sure as hell did.”

  “Oh hell no, if anyone called this, it’s me.” Bishop points to his chest and then holds his arms wide. “I’m like a goddamn oracle.”

  “What do you mean, you called this? I think we all called Hanna and Jake hooking up.” Alex crosses his arms, like this is suddenly some kind of competition. “Vi kept talking about how it would be so wild, because if you two get married then Queenie and King would be stepsiblings.”

  “Yeah, well, I caught these two coming out of a bedroom all cozy, cozy at the wedding, and then again in one of the private rooms at Queenie’s birthday party,” Bishop says. “I thought it was messed up enough that you two were getting all fresh with each other and that you’d
make them stepsiblings, but now they’re sharing a half-brother, too. That makes your kid their kid’s uncle. Think about that for a second.” He puts his fingers at both temples and makes the “mind blown” hand gesture.

  Silence follows. The kind that’s heavy and a little awkward.

  “On the upside, if King and Queenie end up having a kid sooner rather than later, you can raise them together,” Rook says.

  Alex rubs his chin. “That would be—”

  “Fucked up?” Bishop supplies.

  “Kinda cool, really, if you ask me,” Alex comes to my defense. “Age is just a number, man. And kids keep you young. At heart anyway. Look at my dad’s relationship with Robbie. Doesn’t matter that he’s over sixty and loves Led Zeppelin and The Grateful Dead. Robbie treats him like some kind of genius overlord. He loves hanging out with my dad. I actually think he believes his Gram Pot is a wizard, Harry Potter style, you know? Anyway, what I mean is, you can be sixty and still cool to a teenager. And as unconventional as it may be, you’re still young, and lots of people start families in their forties. And you’ll have tons of support. Except maybe for this guy.” Alex thumbs over at Bishop. “I wouldn’t trust him to take care of my goldfish, let alone my kids.”

  “I have a cat,” Bishop points out.

  “Dicken lives with your brother,” Rook says.

  “We have shared custody.”

  “I hadn’t really thought about that. I mean, I’ve thought a lot about the energy demands of toddlers, but not what it would be like to be able to raise a kid alongside my daughter,” I muse.

  “Plus, you have the benefit of experience, and none of the financial or career worries. Once you get past the unconventional family situation, I think it has the potential to be a really cool experience, for all of you,” Alex adds.

  I decide to take the opportunity for what it is. If anyone knows how King is dealing, beyond what I’m seeing, it’s Bishop. Not that I expect him to say anything to me, but the digs have to mean something. “I don’t think King is particularly excited about this whole thing, let alone the idea of Hanna and me together as a couple.” I rub the back of my neck.

  “I thought things were better there,” Alex says.

  “I think it’s a lot to handle for him. I’m basically his boss and his father-in-law. And now Hanna and I are having a kid together. It’s a bit of a mindfuck, I’m sure. Mostly I’m worried about how it’s going to affect Hanna. Anyway, I’m sure it’ll be fine.” I don’t want to put Bishop or Rook in a difficult position where they feel like they have to tell me what’s going on with King behind his back.

  “Maybe you need to sit down with him and talk it through,” Rook suggests.

  “I did. He seemed okay, but I’m not sure if he’s giving me lip service,” I reply.

  “Think about what he’s been through over the past couple of years. Finds out his sister is his mom, gets married to the GM’s daughter. Now his momster is pregnant with his father-in-law’s kid. He’s good at toeing all the lines, better than most, but it’s a lot of hats to try to wear successfully. Maybe cut the guy some slack,” Bishop says.

  It seems like maybe I need to sit down with King again and give him an opportunity to air his grievances with me without worrying about there being repercussions—professionally or on any other level.

  The doorbell rings, ending that slightly uncomfortable conversation. When the rest of the guys show up, we head out to the pool house and settle in for a night of cards. Both Alex and Rook have their phones facedown on the table. It used to irk me, but now I understand why they do it. Bishop keeps his face up. An image of Stevie flipping him off appears every time it flashes with a message.

  I’ve never been someone’s husband. After Kimmie walked away, the idea of bringing another woman into mine and Queenie’s lives who might potentially abandon us again seemed unfathomable. And irresponsible. The only women whose welfare I’ve been concerned about have been Queenie and my own mother. I shifted my focus to being the best dad I could so she wouldn’t feel like she was missing out by not having her mom around. But now I have Hanna and our baby to think about. And I find I think about them often. To the point I’m not fully focused on the poker game. I wonder how she’s doing with the girls. If she’s tired. If she’s having fun, and if I can still convince her to come back here tonight so when I wake up in the morning she’s next to me and not a short drive away.

  At nine-thirty, my phone pings with a message. We’re in the middle of an intense hand, so I don’t look at it right away. But fifteen seconds later, Rook’s phone pings and Bishop’s goes off next, followed by Alex’s. Every time he gets a message, the refrain from a song plays. It’s “Every Breath You Take.” I have to believe it was his wife who did that. Alex jokes about how hard he pursued her when they first started dating.

  Rook turns his phone face up, and Alex does, too. Before I can follow suit, mine rings.

  It’s Queenie.

  I hit the answer button. “Hey honey, what’s up, is everything okay?”

  “Hey. Hi. Um, I don’t want you to panic—” Queenie’s voice wavers.

  “Fuck,” Alex says.

  “Oh, shit,” Rook mutters and pushes his chair back from the table.

  “What’s wrong? What happened?” I take in the panicked expressions on Rook’s, Bishop’s, and Alex’s faces.

  “Hanna fainted in the bathroom. She threw up and she’s cramping now. We’re taking her to the hospital. Can you meet us there?” Queenie asks.

  “We’re leaving right now.” It’s a flurry of action, Rook holding up his keys, and the rest of the guys pushing away from the table. “Are you with Hanna? Can I talk to her?” I ask.

  “I am. She’s pretty upset right now, but I’m giving her the phone. It’s on speaker.”

  I take mine off speaker and bring it to my ear, reminding myself that I have to stay calm, for Hanna’s sake. “Hey, sweetness, I’m sorry I’m not with you right now, but I’m on my way to the hospital, too.”

  She makes a sound that isn’t a word.

  “I know you’re scared, but let’s see what the doctors say, okay? You’ve been doing so well so far, and the doctors have been pleased with how everything is progressing, so let’s not borrow trouble before we need to.” My stomach twists and knots, my own anxiety making it hard to keep my voice steady.

  “I just want everything to be okay,” she whispers, her voice cracking.

  “I know. Me, too, Hanna.” And I mean it. More than I ever thought possible, I want them both to be okay, because the alternative isn’t something I want to face. Or even consider.

  The twenty-minute trip to the hospital feels like it takes an eternity. I stay on the phone with Hanna until she gets there—only minutes before us. And in the short span of time that we’re disconnected, I feel like I’m losing my mind.

  Rook drops me off at the emergency room doors and Alex comes inside with me, likely to keep me from bulldozing my way through the place in search of Hanna.

  He claps a hand on my shoulder as we wait at the front desk for someone to tell us where to go. I feel like I’m on the verge of hyperventilating. “Vi had spotting with the twins. They put her on bed rest, and everything turned out fine.”

  I want to take the reassurance for what it is, but his wife is a decade younger than Hanna. And Hanna has miscarried before. The risks are much higher, the chances that something can go wrong that much more likely.

  Violet comes rushing down the hall. “Oh, thank baby Jesus you’re here. They’ve taken Hanna in for an ultrasound, but they know to expect you. She really needs you with her right now.” She jumps up and mashes her face against Alex’s jaw, maybe to give him a face-punch-kiss, and then grabs my sleeve and almost trips over her feet as she pulls me down the hall.

  I’m barely tracking anything as I’m led to the ultrasound clinic. Lainey and Stevie are hovering near the door. I tell the attendant who I am, and I’m guided down the hall to one of the rooms. The attendant kno
cks and announces that I’m here. The door opens and Queenie steps out, eyes wide.

  She gives me a huge, brief hug. “Hanna needs you. We’re all here for you no matter what.”

  I kiss her on the cheek, an odd state of numbness falling over me as I slip into the room. I’m preparing for the worst. My brain in high gear, considering the potential outcome should Hanna lose the baby. I shut those thoughts down because they’re not going to help me. I can lose my shit later, but Hanna needs my support.

  Her face is pale, her cheeks tear-stained. But the second she sees me, she reaches out and half-tries to get up off the ultrasound table despite the fact the nurse is attempting to take her blood pressure.

  I rush over to her and take her face in my palms. “I’m here. I’ve got you. We’re gonna get through this together. All three of us.” I hope like hell that’s not a lie. The nurse gives up trying to take her blood pressure for a minute while I calm Hanna down, encouraging her to slow her panicked breathing.

  Most of what she says is incoherent, which is unnerving, but she keeps telling me how much she wants this baby and she doesn’t want to lose him.

  I stay for every part of the exam they’ll allow.

  After three hours and a lot of tests, the doctor tell us that Hanna fainted as a result of her gestational hypertension and not eating enough before she went to visit the girls.

  The doctor advises modified bed rest, and they keep her overnight to make sure Hanna’s blood pressure isn’t too high, and give her steroids to help mature the baby’s lung, should she go into labor sooner than we’d like, or they’re unable to keep her blood pressure under control. The doctors allow Queenie and King to come into the room, but everyone else has been sent home hours ago, with the promise of text updates.

  Queenie and King are only allowed to stay for a few minutes. King whispers in Hanna’s ear, his face a mask of worry as he hugs her and promises to come back in the morning.

  Once they leave for home, I settle into the chair beside her bed and take her hand in mine. “You need to sleep.”