The Lunatic at Large

by J. Storer Clouston

  CHAPTER IV.

  The Baron was a few minutes late in joining the party at lunch, and whenhe appeared he held an open letter in his hand. It was only the middle ofthe next day, and yet he could have sworn that last night he wascomparatively whole-hearted, he felt so very much more in love already.

  "Yet anozzer introdogtion has found me out," he said as he took his seat."I have here a letter of invitation vich I do not zink I shall accept."

  He threw an amorous glance at Lady Alicia, which her watchful motherrightly interpreted as indicating the cause of his intended refusal.

  "Who is it this time?" asked Mr Bunker.

  "Sir Richard Brierley of Brierley Park, Dampshire. Is zat how youpronounce it?"

  "Sir Richard Brierley!" exclaimed the Countess; "why, Alicia and I aregoing to visit some relatives of ours who live only six miles fromBrierley Park! When has he asked you, Baron?"

  "Ze end of next week."

  "How odd! We are going down to Dampshire at the end of next week too. Youmust accept, Baron!"

  "I shall!" exclaimed the overjoyed Baron. "Shall ve go, Bonker?"

  "I'm not asked, I'm afraid."

  "Ach, bot zat is nozzing. I shall tell him."

  "As you please, Baron," replied Mr Bunker, with a half glance at LadyAlicia.

  The infatuated Baron had already begun to dread the inevitable hour ofseparation, and this piece of good fortune put him into the highestspirits. He felt so amiable towards the whole world that when the fourwent out for a stroll in the afternoon he lingered for a minute by LadyGrillyer's side, and in that minute Mr Bunker and Lady Alicia were out ofhail ahead. The Baron's face fell.

  "Shall I come down to this place?" said Mr Bunker.

  "Would you like to?"

  "I should be sorry," he replied, "to part with--the Baron."

  Lady Alicia had expected a slightly different ending to this sentence, andso, to tell the truth, Mr Bunker had intended.

  "Oh, if you can't stay away from the Baron, you had better go."

  "It is certainly very hard to tear myself away from so charming a personas the Baron; perhaps you can feel for me?"

  "I think he is very--nice."

  "He thinks you very nice."

  "Does he?" said Lady Alicia, with great indifference, and a moment laterchanged the subject.

  Meanwhile the Baron was growing very uneasy. Of course it was quitenatural that Mr Bunker should find it pleasant to walk for a few minutesby the side of the fairest creature on earth, and very possibly he wasartfully pleading his friend's cause. Yet the Baron felt uneasy. Heremembered Mr Bunker's invariable success with the gentler sex, his wit,his happy smile, and his good looks; and he began to wish most sincerelythat these fascinations were being exercised on the now somewhatbreathless Countess, for his efforts to overtake the pair in front hadboth annoyed and exhausted Lady Grillyer.

  "Need we walk quite so fast, Baron?" she suggested; and Lady Grillyer'ssuggestions were of the kind that are evidently meant to be acted upon.

  "Ach, I did forged," said the Baron, absently, and without further remarkhe slackened his pace for a few yards and then was off again.

  "You were telling me," gasped the Countess, "of something you thoughtof--doing when--you went--home."

  "Zo? Oh yes, it vas--Teufel! I do not remember."

  "Really, Baron," said the Countess, decidedly, "I cannot go any farther atthis rate. Let us turn. The others will be turning too, in a minute."

  In fact the unlucky Baron had clean run Lady Grillyer's maternal instinctsoff their feet, and he suffered for it by seeing nothing of either hisfriend or his charmer for an hour and a half.

  That night he accepted Sir Richard's invitation, but said nothing whateverabout bringing a friend.

  For the next week Rudolph was in as many states of mind as there werehours in each day. He walked and rode and drove with Lady Alicia throughthe most romantic spots he could find. He purchased a large assortment ofgolf-clubs, and under her tuition essayed to play that most dangerous ofgames for mixed couples. In turn he broke every club in his set; thecavities he hewed in the links are still pointed out to the curious; butthe heart of the Lady Alicia alone he seemed unable to damage. There wasalways a moment at which his courage failed him, and in that fatal pauseshe invariably changed the subject with the most innocent air in theworld.

  Every now and then the greenest spasms of jealousy would seize him. Whydid she elect to disappear with Mr Bunker on the very morning that he hadresolved should settle his fate? It is true he had made the sameresolution every morning, but on this particular one he had no doubt hewould have put his fate to the touch. And why on a certain moonlightevening was he left to the unsentimental company of the Countess?

  He made no further reference to the visit to Brierley Park; in fact heshunned discussion of any kind with his quondam bosom friend.

  The time slipped past, till the visit to St Egbert's was almost at an end.On the day after to-morrow all four were going to leave (where Mr Bunkerwas going, his friend never troubled to inquire).

  They sat together latish in the evening in the Baron's room. That veryafternoon Lady Alicia had spent more time in Mr Bunker's society than inhis, and the Baron felt that the hour had come for an explanation.

  "Bonker, I haf a suspection!" he exclaimed, suddenly. "It is not I, botyou, who are ze friend to ze beautiful Lady Alicia. You are not doing mefair!"

  "My dear Baron!"

  "It is so: you are not doing me fair," the Baron reiterated.

  "My dear fellow," replied Mr Bunker, "it is you are so much in love thatyou have lost your wonted courage. You don't use your chances."

  "I do not get zem."

  "Nonsense, Baron! I haven't spent one hour in Lady Alicia's company toyour twenty-four, and yet if I'd been matrimonially inclined I could haveproposed twice over. You've had the chance of being accepted fifty times."

  "I haf not been accepted vunce," said the Baron, moodily.

  "Have you put the question?"

  "I haf not dared."

  "Well, my dear Baron, whose fault is that?"

  The Baron was silent.

  "Ask her to-morrow."

  "No, Bonker," said the Baron, sadly; "she treats me not like a lover. Shetalks of friendship. I do not vish a frient!"

  Mr Bunker looked thoughtfully up at the ceiling. "You don't think you havetouched her heart?" he asked at length.

  "I fear not."

  "You must try an infallible recipe for winning a woman's heart. You mustbe in trouble."

  "In trouble!"

  "I have tried it once myself, with great success."

  "Bot how?"

  "You must fall ill."

  "Bot I cannot; I am too healthful, alas!"

  Mr Bunker smiled artfully. "They come to tea in our rooms to-morrow, youknow. By then, Baron, you must be laid up, ill or not, just as you please.A grain of Lady Alicia's sympathy is worth more than a ton of even yourwit."

  The standard chosen for the measurement of his wit escaped the Baron, thescheme delighted him.

  "Ha, Bonker! schoen! I tvig! Goot!" he cried. "How shall ve do?"

  "Leave it to me."

  The Baron reflected, and his smile died away.

  "Sopposing," he said, slowly, "zey find out? Is it vise? Is it straight?"

  "They can't find out. They go the next morning, and what's to prevent yourmaking a quick recovery and pluckily going down to Brierley Park as theinteresting convalescent? She will know that you've made a dangerousjourney on her account."

  The Baron's face cleared again.

  "Let us try!" he said; "anyzing is better zan my present state. Bot, becareful, Bonker!"

  "I shall take the most minute precautions," replied Mr Bunker.