Fractured Hearts: A Fractured Rock Star Romance

by L. M. Dalgleish

  “I’m going to be the official tour photographer for Fractured!” She couldn’t mask the mildly hysterical tone of her voice, as if even she didn’t quite believe what she was saying. There was silence at the other end of the phone. “Piper, are you still there?”

  “You are freaking kidding me, aren’t you?” Piper’s shriek was piercing, and Lexie held the phone away from her ear.

  “Um, no, I’m not. Although I can’t believe it’s true either.”

  “That’s incredible, Lexie, what an unbelievable opportunity! Oh, I’m so jealous—I love those guys. Do you need an assistant? Because I’m willing to help you out. Just as a favor to my favorite sister-in-law, you understand. I wouldn’t do it for anyone else.”

  Lexie laughed. “I’m your only sister-in-law. And sorry, but it’s a one-person job.”

  “So how did this even happen? It’s not your typical line of work.”

  “Connor saw one of my photos in a magazine and liked it. He called me up, and I flew to LA this morning to meet him and the band’s manager.”

  There was another lengthy pause and then Piper’s voice came back sounding choked. “You met Connor Byrne this morning? Oh my God, he is so freaking hot. What was he like? Did he sing to you? No, of course he didn’t sing to you, why would he sing to you? Did he sing to you? Lexie, why aren’t you telling me? Come on, spill the beans already.”

  Lexie couldn’t help but laugh. “I would if you’d stop for a breath.”

  Piper snorted. “Sorry, but you can’t drop these things on me and not expect me to explode. I’ve had a crush on that guy—all those guys actually—for years, and you casually mention you met one of them this morning. But seriously, what was he like in person?”

  Lexie paused, not sure whether to mention her unexpected reaction to Connor. She chickened out, settling on a lackluster “He’s quite charismatic.”

  There was a disbelieving silence. “I’m sorry, did you just describe Connor Byrne as ‘quite charismatic’? Wow, talk about damning someone with faint praise. He’s one of the hottest men in the world, has the voice of a god, not to mention an Irish accent that would make any woman swoon, and the best you can come up with to describe him is ‘quite charismatic’? Now come on, you can’t tell me he didn’t make your lady parts tingle, even a bit. And you’re going on tour with him. Think about the possibilities…” Piper let out a wistful sigh at the thought.

  Lexie knew Piper was joking, but she still felt uncomfortable talking about another man with Damien’s sister. “He’s very good-looking, of course, and he seemed like a nice enough guy, for a rock star. I’m looking forward to working with him, but that’s all—I’m not interested in him in any other way. I’m not ready for anything like that yet.”

  This time Piper’s sigh was sad. “Lexie, God knows I know how much you loved my brother, but it’s been over three years. You have to start moving on, sweetie. His death was a tragedy, but it was him that died in that car crash, not you. You can’t let it stop you living your life.”

  A rush of hurt flooded through Lexie. “I haven’t let it stop me. I’ve spent the last few years building my business. I’m traveling, seeing the world like Damien and I always planned to do.”

  “I know you have, Lexie. You’ve done amazing things, and you’ll keep doing amazing things because that’s the kind of person you are. But you’re moving forward in every way but the most important. You’re young and beautiful and one of the warmest and most loving people I know, but it’s like you’ve put up a wall around your heart. I understand why, I do. It takes a special kind of bravery putting your heart out there after a loss like that. You’ve been brave in every other part of your life; you have to be brave with this too.”

  Lexie tried to protest, but Piper kept going. “Look, I’m not saying that you should fall in love with Connor Byrne. In fact, I’d seriously recommend against it, considering who he is. But there’s nothing wrong with a bit of healthy sexual attraction, and if anyone should inspire that it’s him. Or God, any of the other guys in that band, since they’re all gorgeous. At the very least, Lexie, if you can admit to yourself that you’re attracted to someone, then maybe that will be the first step toward falling in love again.”

  Lexie let Piper’s words sink in. Her first instinct was to deny everything, but she made herself think about what her friend was saying.

  Her relationship with Damien hadn’t been perfect of course—no relationship was—but it had been everything she had wanted. They’d fit together so well, almost as if they’d been made for each other. He’d been gentle and sweet and easygoing, and they had been so in love. She’d seen their lives together play out in her mind’s eye a thousand times. All their dreams, the plans they’d made, thoughts of starting a family…

  Even though Damien had been gone for three years, admitting she was attracted to someone else seemed like the worst kind of betrayal. As if she was throwing away the future they’d once envisioned together.

  She knew it was irrational—that future was gone for good. She just wasn’t sure she was ready to confront the reality yet. And if she was honest with herself, she was scared to go through any more heartache. Putting her heart out there risked exposing her to more pain if things didn’t work out. She wasn’t sure if she was strong enough to handle that.

  Still, she couldn’t deny she missed the intimacy of a relationship. Having someone to talk to, someone to hold. Someone to share her joys and sorrows with. She didn’t want to rule those things out either, or the possibility of having a family. She hoped the day would come when she could imagine being with someone else, someone that wasn’t Damien. But not now. Not yet.

  Her long silence must have worried Piper because she spoke again, her voice sad. “I love you, Lexie, and I want you to be happy. Please just tell me you’ll keep your mind and heart open to different possibilities, that’s all I’m asking.”

  “I will, Piper, I promise.” She hoped her friend couldn’t hear the ambivalence in her voice.

  Lexie breathed a sigh of relief when the conversation moved on to general chat about the upcoming tour, and then to what else was happening in their lives. Before they hung up, she promised Piper she’d come and visit as soon as her work allowed.

  * * *

  The next morning, Lexie went through her camera kit to take inventory of what she needed before she left in a few weeks. She was running low on some essentials, so she headed out to her favorite camera store.

  When she got there, she made her way to the back of the shop, smiling when she saw the owner, Eric, serving a customer. She waited until he was done before wandering over to say hello.

  She and Eric had become friends when she’d started coming here regularly after her business began taking off. Although the friendship hadn’t come until after he’d asked her out, and she’d had to rebuff him gently. Luckily, the rejection hadn’t fazed him. Instead, they’d fallen into an easy friendship centered around their ability to talk all things cameras and photography.

  Stepping up to the counter, she gave him a warm smile which widened at the sight of the Fractured tour t-shirt he was wearing. His eyes lit up, and he returned her smile with a broad one of his own. “Hey, Lexie, long time no see. What’ve you been up to?”

  “Oh, you know, this and that. I got back on Monday from photographing the Badlands National Park in South Dakota for a travel magazine. That was awesome.”

  “Sounds like fun. Do I get to see any of the photos?”

  “Oh sorry, I didn’t think to bring any of them with me. Next time?”

  “Well, I suppose that’s a good excuse for you to come back in and see me soon.” He grinned at her, then raised a questioning brow. “So, what brings you here today, then?”

  “Well, I’ve got a new job coming up, and I need to grab more memory cards and batteries. Plus, I wanted to pick your brain a bit.”

  “Oh really? What’s the job, then?”

  “You’ll never believe it, but I’m going to
be a tour photographer.”

  He gaped at her. “Really? That’s so not your thing.”

  She laughed. “I know, I was shocked too. But they liked my work, I guess. It’ll be an interesting experience, that’s for sure.”

  He raised his eyebrows. “What band is it? Anyone I would know?”

  Lexie debated how much to tell him. Connor hadn’t asked her to sign a nondisclosure agreement, and she could use Eric’s advice since he had more experience in this area than she did. Plus, she’d already told Piper, so there wasn’t any reason not to tell him.

  Leaning forward, she pointed at his shirt. He followed the direction of her finger, glancing down and then back up at her with round eyes, before mouthing, “Fractured?”

  She nodded, smiling widely at his stunned expression.

  “Oh my God, that’s incredible. They’re my favorite band; I’ve actually been to five of their concerts. Have you ever been to one? Do you know what you’re getting yourself into?”

  She shook her head and grimaced. “That’s one reason why I’m here. I have a fairly good idea of what I need to do, but I want to check I’m not missing anything. I know you did some concert photography back when you were freelancing.”

  Eric motioned one of his sales assistants over, before turning to her and saying, “Let’s go grab a coffee, and we can talk about it.”

  A few minutes later they were sitting down at a nearby café. After their coffees were served, Eric started talking.

  “So first of all, from what I’ve seen during previous concerts, Fractured has lots of lights and pyrotechnics during their shows, but not a lot of crazy props. Their sets are usually simple because they like to keep the focus on the music. They have those massive video screens around the stage, but don’t engage in much over-the-top theatrics.”

  “Right, thanks, that’s good to know.” She nodded. “I was planning to use my fastest lens and bump up the ISO. The images will probably end up grainy, but hopefully there won’t be any blur. And I can always edit out any grain and noise during post-processing.”

  Eric nodded. “Make sure you’re always there for the sound and lighting checks so you can get a reading on the spotlights; you’ll save time in adjusting your camera during the concert. It’ll be easy to change your shutter speed to compensate for darker areas, like when you’re shooting the drummer since drummers aren’t in the spotlight as often. Once you have a thorough understanding of the stage and lighting setup for the concerts, you won’t need to do as many adjustments on the fly.”

  Lexie had started making notes on her phone. She knew most of this stuff, but it was always good to get a sanity check and make sure she wasn’t overlooking something obvious. “I figured I’d take two cameras with me to each concert. That way I’ll have a wide-angle lens ready to go if I need it, just to get shots of the entire band together, as well as the crowd.”

  “Yep, that’s always a good idea.”

  Lexie bit her lip. “God, I hope I don’t screw this up.”

  “You won’t screw it up, Lexie. You’re insanely talented, which is why they want you. Trust your instincts. You know what you’re doing, and you’ve got a fantastic eye.”

  She nodded, still uncertain.

  “The best piece of advice I can give you is to watch a lot of videos of their previous concerts. That way you’ll get an idea of what they tend to do, how they move around the stage, that kind of thing.” Eric reached over the table and placed his hand over hers. “And finally, Lexie, have fun, okay? You deserve it.”

  Tears pricked the back of her eyes. Eric knew about Damien. She’d told him everything over coffee one day, a few months after they’d started hanging out. He was right though. She needed to stop being nervous about this opportunity and see it for what it was—another chance to live life to the fullest for Damien’s sake. Just as she’d vowed she would when she was working through her grief.

  She turned her hand over to hold Eric’s and gave it a squeeze. “Okay, I promise I’ll have fun too.”

  He nodded, his expression serious. “Oh, and make sure those rock stars don’t take any liberties with you. Otherwise, they’ll have me to answer to.”

  That made her laugh. “I don’t think that’ll be an issue.”

  He raised a skeptical eyebrow. “For someone whose job involves seeing the beauty of the world through a lens, you can be surprisingly oblivious to what’s in front of you.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Whatever.”

  Back at Eric’s store, she stocked up on memory cards and batteries, something you could never have too many of on the road where stuff got left behind or lost all the time. After making her purchases, she kissed Eric on the cheek. “Thanks for the advice. I’ll give you a full rundown when I get back.”

  “You’d better.” He mock scowled at her. She laughed and turned to leave but stopped before opening the door when he called out to her. “Don’t forget, have fun.”

  She was smiling as she left, feeling far more confident than when she’d arrived.

  Chapter 5

  Three weeks later, Lexie joined the monster of a convoy in Las Vegas. They had sent a car to pick her up at the airport and Drew met her at the drop-off point before taking her suitcase and leading her through the parking area toward the band’s tour bus. As they walked, he pointed out different people and pieces of equipment.

  Lexie looked around, her heart starting to thump. Everything was chaotic. Members of the crew yelled to each other as they loaded pieces of kit onto trucks, and the engines of several buses rumbled as they idled, filling the scorching air with the pungent smell of diesel.

  The shrill screams from the crowd of devoted, mostly female, fans that had gathered to get a glimpse of the band grated on her nerves. For about the thousandth time since she’d agreed to do the job, Lexie regretted her decision. This was not her usual scene and she felt completely out of her comfort zone.

  She fished her camera out of its case, uncapped the lens, and started taking shots as they walked. The familiar weight of the camera in her hands calmed her and helped her to focus. The order behind the chaos finally emerged, and she framed up and shot a few decent pictures as they walked.

  Before she knew it, they’d reached the tour bus at the far end of the lot. It was massive, all black, and had the band’s name written in large neon blue letters along the side.

  “Subtle,” Lexie muttered.

  Drew laughed as he knocked on the door of the bus. “You’ll soon learn that nothing these guys do is subtle.”

  A giant of a man, dressed all in black, swung the door open. Drew introduced him to her as Don, one of the band’s security detail, before leading her up into the cool, air-conditioned interior. As far as vehicles went, this one was huge, but Lexie could imagine how the cramped quarters might become stressful after months on the road.

  Drew led her straight into the open living area at the front of the bus. Wood paneling lined the walls between the big tinted windows, and plush black leather couches extended down both sides of the bus. A kitchenette and a small built-in dining table with bench seats on either side of it were located at the far end of the long space.

  Glancing around, Lexie took in the four large and very good-looking men lounging on various seats throughout the space. It was the first time Lexie had seen the whole band together, and it was kind of overwhelming.

  Unbidden, her eyes jumped to the end of the room where Connor’s long, lean form was sitting at the table. He’d been looking at his phone when she walked in but glanced up as her gaze landed on him. His piercing green eyes met hers, and for what felt like minutes but must have only been a second, she couldn’t look away.

  Finally forcing her gaze elsewhere, Lexie realized Drew was introducing her to the rest of the band. She gave herself a mental shake and focused on what he was saying.

  “Lexie, you’ve already met Connor, but this is Tex, Zac, and Noah. Guys, this is Lexie, your photographer for the next few months.” Drew put his
hand on the small of her back and propelled her gently forward.

  She recognized the three men from the research she’d done over the last few weeks. Tex was the band’s lead guitarist, and resembled a huge Viking, with muscles for days, long sun-bleached brown hair and whiskey-colored eyes. Noah, the drummer, was the blond, blue-eyed one currently wearing a charming but devilish smile on his face. He looked more like a hot Californian surfer than a member of a rock band. Zac, the band’s bassist, sometime keyboard player, and backup vocalist was as tall and muscular as the others. He had close-cropped brown hair and soulful-looking hazel eyes with long dark lashes that would be the envy of any woman.

  Lexie gave them a shy smile and a half-wave. All three of the men grinned at her, frank male appreciation obvious in their gazes. A blush heated her cheeks. She was used to a certain amount of attention from men, but nothing that could have prepared her for this. It was overpowering being in such a confined space with so much testosterone.

  The sound of a throat clearing drew everyone’s attention. She glanced over her shoulder to see Connor had come up behind her and was glaring at the other three. After a long few seconds during which Lexie once again considered pulling out the contract, ripping it up, and bolting from the bus, Tex finally spoke up.

  “Nice to meet you, Lexie,” he drawled in a deep, gravelly Southern accent.

  With the ice broken, Zac and Noah chimed in with their own greetings, and Lexie felt some of the tension leave her.

  “If you come this way, Lexie, I’ll show you to your room. It’s down the back here,” Drew said.

  Lexie’s eyes widened. “I’m not going to be staying on this bus, am I? Isn’t there a bus for employees?”

  Before Drew could answer, Connor spoke up. “I decided you’d be better off here than on the crew bus, and you’ll have better access to us for photos. You don’t have to worry though, we’re well behaved. Most of the time.” The corners of his mouth curled up, but the expression wasn’t exactly reassuring.