Forgotten Child

by Kitty Neale

  Robin had always known his mother didn’t show Jenny much affection, and the fact that she was adopted now explained it. He was simply happy that he no longer had to think of Jenny as his sister, and went back to his studies with a smile on his face.

  Delia’s mind was raging. Edward was right; Robin turning on her like that was indeed the last thing she’d expected. She and her son shared a special bond, one that didn’t include Jennifer, so why he had acted like that on the girl’s behalf was beyond her comprehension. She had planned this moment for so long, a time when she could finally get rid of Jennifer, but instead she now stood to lose her son too. No, no, that couldn’t happen. Yes, she would miss Robin when he went to university next year, but they wouldn’t have been estranged. He would come home every weekend and that would have fitted perfectly into her plans, but now…

  Oh, that girl. As usual Jennifer had spoiled everything, forced her to rethink, and Delia began to quietly fume. She had to do something to bring Robin round…but what?

  At last, though she was unhappy about it, by the time Edward had come back downstairs, Delia had decided what she had to do. If she didn’t want to lose Robin it was her only choice – but one day, no matter what, she would make Edward pay for this.

  Jenny stayed in her room for over an hour, trying to come to terms with the fact that she’d been adopted. She would never think of Delia as her real mother again, but Jenny couldn’t feel the same about her father, and was deeply upset that she wasn’t really his daughter. Edward loved her, she was sure of it, really loved her, and though they were only distantly related, at least that was some kind of link.

  She clutched her pillow, trying to imagine what her real mother had been like, what her own life would have been like had she lived. It was half an hour later when thirst drove Jenny out of her room, only to find that Robin was leaving his at the same time.

  ‘Hi, Jen, how are you feeling now?’

  ‘I was just going to get a glass of water,’ she said. Robin walked behind her as she went downstairs.

  ‘Jennifer, there you are,’ Delia said, smiling warmly. ‘I know you’ve had a dreadful shock and I felt it best to leave you alone for a while. Are you feeling a little better now?’

  ‘Er…yes,’ Jenny said as she poured a glass of water and gulped it down. Delia was being nice, but as usual she was modifying her behaviour because Robin was around. However, she got a shock when he spoke.

  ‘Mother, don’t pretend that you care about Jenny’s feelings.’

  ‘But I do…’

  ‘You could have fooled me,’ he said.

  Jenny had no idea what had caused Robin to turn on his mother, and feared being blamed for it, but then her father came in from the garden, smiling when he saw her.

  ‘Jenny, I was about to see if I could persuade you to come downstairs.’

  ‘I was too,’ Delia said. ‘I wanted to talk to you, Jennifer, to assure you that though you now know you’re adopted, it won’t make any difference. We are still your parents and this is your home.’

  Robin made a snorting sound and left the room, leaving Jenny still feeling bewildered at his sudden change of attitude towards his mother.

  Delia continued to be pleasant for the rest of the day, yet it didn’t fool Jenny and she guessed it was her usual act put on for Robin and her father’s sake. She avoided being alone with her, keeping close to her father; dreading him leaving when the weekend was over.

  Chapter Five

  All too soon it was Monday morning, and Jenny woke early. Her father would be leaving shortly and she was already close to tears. He might not have been her real father, but she loved him dearly and treasured the closeness they shared. She dressed hurriedly and crept downstairs.

  ‘I might have guessed,’ Edward said, smiling. ‘It’s so early, but here you are, the only one up to see me off.’

  ‘I wish you didn’t have to go.’

  ‘So do I, darling,’ he said, rising to his feet and hugging her. ‘I know it’s been a difficult weekend for you, but I promise that, no matter what, I’ll be back for your birthday.’

  Jenny didn’t want him to go and clung to him. Her birthday was on the seventeenth of July, in about five weeks, but to her it felt more like five years as he pulled away. She watched, fighting tears as he picked up his briefcase, and then, with a quick kiss on her cheek and a whispered goodbye, he was gone.

  Delia was annoyed to be disturbed by the sound of Jennifer getting up to see her father off at the crack of dawn. As far as Delia was concerned, she was glad that Edward was leaving. After all, it was Jennifer who got all his attention when he was here. To punish him she decided she would remain in bed.

  She was still angry at being unable to get rid of Jennifer as planned, and at a loss to understand her son’s change of allegiance. One minute Robin had been on her side, happy to leave Jennifer out in the cold, but then, at the mere mention of her moving into a bedsit, he had turned. Delia had been kind to Jennifer all weekend but it hadn’t helped, and Robin was still giving her the cold shoulder.

  Still puzzled by her son’s behaviour, Delia continued to mull on it, wondering if it was sympathy that Robin had felt for Jennifer. Perhaps her son was soft and more like his father than she had realised. If that was the case, the only way to get Robin back on her side would be to turn the tables and become the damsel in distress.

  With an idea coming to mind, Delia pondered on it. Robin was no longer a child; he was a young man and surely old enough to be spoken to as an adult. Yes, of course he was, though she daren’t tell him everything.

  At last, satisfied that what she’d come up with could work, Delia managed to doze off again until her alarm sounded at seven. She then got up to follow her usual routine. There would be no making an appearance downstairs until she was bathed, dressed, her make-up applied and hair immaculately in place. It was a standard that had been set by her late mother, one Delia always adhered too, and she ensured that both Robin and Jennifer followed her example.

  Ready now, Delia went along to her son’s room. Opening the door, she called, ‘Robin, it’s time to get up.’

  ‘Yes, I know. I’m awake.’

  Delia was surprised. Robin was usually difficult to rouse, the last one to make an appearance every morning, but for once he sounded fully awake and alert. She wanted to speak to him out of Jennifer’s hearing and now made the most of this opportunity.

  ‘Robin, I’m so unhappy and desperately need to talk to you.’

  ‘Not now, Mother.’

  ‘Please, Robin, it won’t take long. It’s just that I need to get this off my chest.’

  ‘Can’t it wait until we’re downstairs?’

  ‘No, darling, I’m afraid it can’t,’ Delia said, moving further into the room to sit at Robin’s desk. Books were strewn over it, some still open, notes written, some crumbled up and tossed aside, but for once Delia’s fastidiousness was put to one side as she composed her face to one of sadness. ‘Robin, I was against adopting Jenny, but your father virtually forced me into it.’

  ‘From what he said, we were her only family.’

  ‘We were so distantly connected that I’d hardly call us that. Your father hadn’t seen them since his childhood, so of course I had never met them. We already had you, and with so many childless couples desperate to adopt, I felt it would be kinder if Jennifer went to one of them. Your father didn’t agree and I suppose I was full of resentment, but despite that I did my best when we adopted Jennifer and grew fond of her. I tried to love her, really I did, but she was such a difficult baby and I’m afraid one can’t love to order.’

  ‘I don’t remember her being difficult.’

  ‘You wouldn’t, darling. You were just a toddler then,’ Delia said, forcing tears into her eyes as she changed the subject. ‘Oh, Robin, a few months ago it was my fortieth birthday and all I’ve ever been is a wife and mother. With you leaving home to go to university next year and Jennifer almost grown up too, I’ve been feel
ing lost, as though I won’t have a role any more. I’ll be redundant as a mother, with nothing to do but rattle around in this large, empty house.’

  For a moment Robin looked a little sympathetic, but then said, ‘If that’s the case and you’re fond of Jenny, why would you want her to leave home too?’

  ‘All right, I’ll try to explain. As I said, I was beginning to feel lost, but then a woman at the tennis club, Marcia Bateman, made me look at things differently. When Marcia’s children left the nest she saw it as her time, a chance to be something more than just a wife and mother. She studied interior design and then started up a very successful business. I admire Marcia, and it made me realise that when you go to university there’s nothing to stop me from doing something similar.’ Delia paused to bite her lip, eyes lowered for effect.

  ‘Yes, well, I suppose you could.’

  ‘Robin, there’s a lot of work involved in setting up a new business, and though this is going to sound dreadful, in truth I wanted the freedom to work as many hours as necessary without feeling I have to rush home to look after Jennifer. It was selfish of me and I realise that now. Until Jennifer is older this will remain her home, and I’ll just have to rethink my business plan.’

  At last Robin smiled. ‘If that’s the case I’d hardly call you selfish, but I don’t think you need to change your plans. Jenny will be at work too, and she’s quite capable of looking after herself until you come home. Now, why don’t you tell me about this business venture?

  ‘With so many large houses in this area needing domestic staff, I’m thinking of setting up an agency to provide them, along with catering services. However, I’m not going to do anything until you leave for university, and so for now I’d rather you didn’t mention my ideas to your father.’

  ‘Why? Do you think he’ll be against it?’

  ‘Yes, I do. You see your father wasn’t well off when we married and I had to use my inheritance to buy our first house.’

  ‘I didn’t know that. I knew he’d lost his parents during the war and was brought up by his aunt, but I still don’t see why he’d be against you starting up a business.’

  ‘Your father is old-fashioned and I think it wounded his pride when I paid for our first home. So much so that from then on he insisted on being the provider while I stayed at home.’

  ‘I see, but that was a long time ago and surely he’d feel differently now?’

  ‘I hope so, because I’d love to be a successful businesswoman like Marcia.’

  ‘And I’m sure you will.’

  ‘I doubt your father thinks I’m capable of anything other than being a housewife, and oh, Robin, what if I fail?’ Delia cried, pulling out her handkerchief and pretending to dab tears from her eyes. ‘What if I prove him right?’

  ‘Please, Mummy, don’t get upset. I’m sure you’ll be fine, but if you want to chew your idea over with me, perhaps go over the setting-up costs and things like that, I’d be happy to help. I’ve no experience in such things, but as I’m going to study economics at university at least I’m good with figures. I should be able to work out the initial costs and even some profit projections.’

  ‘Robin, that would be wonderful…but I don’t want to take you away from your studies.’

  ‘I’ve caught up now. Actually, it would make a marvellous project and something I’d look forward to getting my teeth into. How about we make a start this coming weekend?’

  ‘Yes, I’d like that, but for now I’d better leave you to get ready for college,’ Delia said, smiling as she left her son’s room. Robin had been sympathetic, had offered to help, and that was a start.

  Jenny had been sitting alone, still upset at her father’s departure. Even though he’d promised to come home for her birthday, she guessed that it would only be for a weekend again. His job involved a lot of travelling, but now Jenny wondered if he preferred to be away – if he avoided coming home. Though she didn’t like the thought, deep down Jenny couldn’t blame him: this was an unhappy house, unwelcoming, full of tension, and laughter was a rare thing.

  She heard her mother’s footsteps on the stairs and tensed. What sort of mood was she going to be in? Jenny didn’t know if she could bear it if it was a bad one. She felt a longing to escape this house, to run from all the unhappiness contained within these walls and to never come back.

  ‘Jennifer, I do not appreciate being woken at the crack of dawn.’

  ‘I…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to disturb you.’

  ‘Don’t just sit there, make a fresh pot of tea.’

  Jenny did her bidding, relieved when Robin appeared, smiling at her as he said, ‘Morning, Jen.’

  ‘What would you like for breakfast, darling?’ Delia asked him.

  ‘How about scrambled eggs on toast?’

  ‘Would you like the same, Jennifer?’

  ‘Yes…yes please. Do you want me to make the toast?’

  ‘Yes, and thank you, dear,’ she said, smiling warmly. ‘I know you’re upset that your father has gone, but I’m sure he’ll keep his promise and be home for your birthday.’

  Jenny wasn’t fooled. She knew that this sudden kind manner was all for Robin’s benefit and it seemed to be working as Robin now grinned at his mother and said, ‘When he rings, you’ll just have to nag him, Mother.’

  ‘Yes, and you can be sure I will.’

  Jenny just wanted to get breakfast over with, to go to school and get out of her mother’s way. Twenty minutes later, she picked up her empty plate to take it to the sink.

  ‘I…I’m off now, but I’ll be a little late home as I have to see the careers adviser after school.’

  ‘Oh goodness, Jennifer,’ said Delia. ‘I’m so sorry, I’d forgotten. Still, don’t worry, I’ll be there.’

  Jenny’s eyes widened with surprise. ‘You’re coming?’

  ‘Of course I am. This is an important time for you and I want to make sure you’re given the best opportunities for when you leave school.’

  ‘But…but when I gave you the letter you said that…’

  ‘I said I would be there,’ Delia interrupted firmly.

  Jenny saw the warning look and knew better than to argue, yet she remembered well that when she’d been given the letter, her mother had carelessly thrown it to one side, saying that seeing a careers adviser was a waste of time for someone fit only for menial employment. Now it seemed she had changed her mind…but why? Was it another show put on for Robin’s benefit?

  ‘Off you go now, or you’ll be late for school,’ her mother now said, and though her voice sounded soft, there was hardness in her eyes.

  ‘Yes, all right. Bye,’ Jenny croaked.

  ‘See you later, Jen,’ Robin called, clearly oblivious to the undertones.

  Jenny hurried out, just wanting to be away from the house, her mother, and wishing she never had to come back.

  Chapter Six

  When Jenny left, Robin lingered at the table, his eyes on his mother. He could understand why she wanted to start up a business, to achieve something in her own right, but there was something in her explanation of not wanting to neglect Jenny that hadn’t rung true.

  As a small child he’d taken his mother’s love and affection for granted, had hardly questioned why Jenny had been left out in the cold. His mother favoured him, while his father favoured Jenny, and he’d assumed it was the same in all households. Of course it wasn’t, and he had eventually learned that, but at least now he knew why. Jenny was adopted, and because of her resentment his mother had been unable to love her. Robin felt he could understand that, and at least his mother had said she was fond of Jenny, though she hardly showed it.

  ‘Robin, if you don’t get a move on you’ll be late too.’

  ‘I’ll be off in a minute,’ he said. ‘I’ll be interested to hear how Jenny got on with the careers adviser when I come home.’

  ‘I intend to see that she’s given the best advice but, let’s face it, Jennifer has never been as bright as you. Nonetheless, I
’d like to see her with some sort of career, and I’ll make sure she isn’t fobbed off with some sort of dead-end job.’

  ‘Jobs that offer a career usually start out with low pay.’

  ‘If she’s given the opportunity for advancement, the opening salary is irrelevant. After all, living at home, Jennifer won’t have to worry about her earnings.’

  ‘Right, I’d best be off,’ Robin said, relieved that it was likely that Jenny wouldn’t be earning enough to leave home for some time yet.

  ‘Bye, darling,’ Delia called.

  Robin happily went off to college, content in the knowledge that Jenny would still be there, at least until he hopefully left for university next year. A year, Robin thought. He’d leave it for a year, but then he’d make his move.

  Jenny had left Castle Close, hoping to meet up with Tina Hammond on the way to school. She knew her mother disapproved of their friendship, and she wasn’t allowed to invite Tina to the house, but nevertheless they remained constant friends, albeit behind Delia’s back. Jenny preferred to have one special friend, a best friend rather than a group, and Tina partly fulfilled something she felt missing in her life – a sort of kinship. Though they occasionally chatted to other girls, for the most part the two of them were inseparable. Physically, they were very different, Jenny blonde and pale, Tina dark, her eyes brown and her skin olive toned. They both wanted to swap their colouring for each other’s, and had laughed when they had first found this out.

  Tina and her family lived in Princes Way, an area that had changed so radically in recent years that it had become something else for her mother to carp about. It had started with the building of a block of council flats, and had progressed to the development of what were now purpose-built estates of houses and maisonettes. A few large houses remained, set behind high walls, and though their proximity to Wimbledon Common still made them desirable, her mother said that because they were now surrounded by council property, they had depreciated greatly in value.