by Alexa Davis
Mark didn’t answer me. Instead, he grabbed me, and he crashed his lips into mine without a second of hesitation. I didn’t have even a moment to stop this. His lips had claimed mine, and there was nothing I could do.
No, I told myself rapidly as I pushed him off. I can do something, of course I can.
“This… it isn’t a good…” Unfortunately, the same confidence didn’t come through as I spoke aloud. “Idea.”
Mark smirked at me as if he’d given up on caring what was and wasn’t a good idea. That made me so nervous because if he didn’t care anymore, then how was I going to keep up the strong resolve?
“I think…” he said in a smooth voice that absolutely seduced me. “That it’s a great idea.”
His words made me melt; I just couldn’t help it. As he looped his arms around my back and he brought his mouth down to press those delicious lips up against mine, I couldn’t resist. My brain simply switched itself off so I could do what I wanted, rather than what I knew was smart. It didn’t even come back on again when Mark took my hand and he led me down the hallway to his bedroom. I didn’t have a chance to drag my willpower out because he kept his eyes fixed so firmly on mine the entire time. The magnetic pull was far too strong.
Once inside his bedroom, Mark didn’t say anything to me, but he didn’t need to. We both knew exactly where this was headed. He spun me around, kissed me, and began tugging at my clothes. The material whipped from my body as if it was nothing, and I could do nothing but let it happen. Except, I wasn’t just an innocent bystander with no control, allowing this to happen to me; I was needy, desperate, keen for this. In fact, I was yanking at the material covering him too, needing to see that sexy body of his naked.
“Oh wow,” I murmured once his thick, strong abs came out. I ran my finger along his muscles, my core pulsing for him the entire time. There was a hot wetness pooling in my panties, making me feel crazy.
Without even thinking about it, I dropped to my knees in front of him. I fiddled rapidly with his buttons while I yearned for a taste of him. This was nuts and I knew it, but we were already in too deep now.
“Fuck, Olivia,” Mark groaned as his cock sprang free. I gasped at the mere sight of it, blown away by how big it was. Maybe this close up wasn’t the best way to see it for the very first time, but instead of freaking me out, it only turned me on more. It really had been such a long time since I’d been wanted like this.
I slowly ran my hand up and down Mark’s rock-hard length, admiring and exploring his cock with awe. He felt good between my fingers, all smooth and powerful, and I really wanted to know more about what it would be like to have him between my lips. I glanced up at Mark, checking that he was okay with where this night was headed, but since his eyes were closed in an almost pained expression and his head tossed back in ecstasy, I had to assume that yes, he was having a good time, thank you very much!
I brought my mouth closer to him, inhaling his sexy, masculine scent. Being this close to him set my whole body alight. Fairy lights of desire pickled everywhere, sending an intense fizzing sensation through my veins. I brushed my bottom lip against him, dragging my mouth to his tip, and by the time I reached there, Mark’s thighs were solid with tension and there was a small shudder racing up and down him.
I parted my lips and darted my tongue out to explore his tip. His sweet and salty taste actually made my body jolt, the lust was growing to an almost violent level. If I wasn’t careful, I would send myself over the edge in a moment. So, I wrapped my lips all the way around him and I slipped all the way down him until he hit the back of my throat. My heart hammered hard against my rib cage as I peered up at Mark again. He looked utterly blissful.
I continued the movement for a while, moving my mouth up and down him, picking up the pace as he started to lose all control of himself. I desperately wanted to see him fall apart, but before that could happen, he couldn’t help himself from trying to gain back all the power again. He grabbed my head to stop me, took my hand and pulled me upwards into a standing position, then he tossed me backward until I fell onto his sheets.
Mark climbed onto the bed over me, like a lion stalking his prey, and I was more than willing to be consumed. His muscles rippled as he hovered above me before he reached his head down and he nipped at my neck. The sensation had me blindsided; I gasped in pleasant shock. It was a little painful but in a really good way.
Mark shimmied my trousers and panties down, and I wiggled to help him. My ragged breaths were flying out of my mouth, and the intense pressure inside of me was growing. I needed a release, and I needed it now. It had been such a long time, and this tension between us had been flowing for ages, we both needed this.
He paused only for a moment while he grabbed a condom from his nightstand, then his weight crushed onto mine, and he was teasing my entrance. I rolled my hips towards him, needing him, gagging for him. Mark smiled, almost to himself before he kissed me hard. Then, thankfully, it seemed like he could hardly take it any longer either because he slid that delicious cock of his all the way into me. He filled me up, touched me everywhere, reminded me how good it could feel to have someone who, for a moment, was all about me.
“Oh shit!” I cried out, probably a little too loudly, but it felt so phenomenal. “Oh, fucking hell, Mark.”
This is my boss… but it feels so good… I can’t stop… what the hell is wrong with me?
But I didn’t care; I was seeing stars and it felt incredible. My whole body was on fire, I barely even knew my own name anymore. I bucked and writhed, desperate for the hot bliss that I couldn’t stop chasing, and soon I was rewarded by a tsunami of pleasure rolling over me in waves so powerful they completely consumed me. I clung to Mark tightly, I dug my nails into his skin, but he didn’t seem to notice. He was lost in the desire too, completely swallowed up by me. This moment was one of madness, one that definitely shouldn’t have been happening, but it felt too good for me to care. As the orgasm shattered through my body, I gave up even thinking about the consequences of our actions. That was a future problem, and right now I simply wanted to live in the utterly wonderful present.
Chapter Twenty-One
Mark
Monday
I flicked my eyes open as the much too bright sunlight filtered into my vision. Why was my bedroom so bright? This was the exact reason I purchased black out blinds! I didn’t want to be woken up in such a brutal way. I never ever forgot to shut them, so why… oh, right. As I turned to my side and I spotted Olivia there next to me, all became much too clear. She was with me; I overstepped the boundary that I promised myself I wouldn’t.
I propped myself up on my elbow for a moment to gaze down at her, sucking in a deep breath of air as I saw her spread across the sheets looking like an angel. Her expression was soft and peaceful, her hair spilling across the pillow; her beauty well and truly shone through. This was why I found her so hard to resist. I was a red-blooded male, a man with needs, and she wandered around the apartment like sex on legs. She challenged me, infuriated me, made me think terribly inappropriate things… but I suppose I didn’t have to act on them. That was on me. I flopped my head back, pressed it into the pillow, and sighed with anger at myself.
I was in my office, supposedly working, and imagining what it would be like to… well, do what we just did. The idea was there, I was happy to admit that she was on my brain doing all kinds of naughty things to me, but there it was supposed to stay. It was supposed to remain in my mind; I wasn’t sure how I’d gone so nuts and ended up in bed with Olivia. My blood ran burning hot through my body; the storm brewed in my chest. I wasn’t sure how to make up for this mistake. Could we just forget about it and go back to normal?
“What happened?” All of a sudden, my heart stopped dead in my chest as Olivia’s voice snapped at me. It was safe to say that she didn’t sound impressed. “Why?” I twisted to see her reddened face. “Why did we have sex?”
“Erm…” Because you’re gorgeous, because you create
a spark inside of me that I haven’t felt in a very long time, because I one hundred percent like you more than I should… “Because you were there.”
Holy fuck, that wasn’t what I meant to say at all. I wanted to come out with some dignified answer that left us both in the know that this was to be a professional relationship and nothing more. Much as it was fun to have sex with Olivia, and my God she blew my freaking mind, we couldn’t keep doing it. It had to stop somewhere.
Well, goal achieved, I supposed. Judging by the less-than-impressed expression on Olivia’s face, she wouldn’t ever want to look me in the eye again, never mind crawl beneath the sheets next to me. The color completely drained from her face, and she looked like someone had slapped her. That was me, with my words.
“Because…” She gulped down a thick ball of emotion. “Because I was there. Right, yes, I see…”
“I didn’t mean it quite like that.” She glared at me as she waited for me to explain myself but unfortunately, I couldn’t seem to find the words. They were stuck in my throat. “I’m sorry, what I mean is that… I…”
I suddenly felt a sting across my cheek as Olivia reached her hand across and slammed me. Instantly, I touched the painful area, and I gave her a stunned look. I knew that I’d been an asshole, but she could sense that I couldn’t mean it, couldn’t she? I gave her a wide-eyed look and wondered where the fuck we went from here.
“Don’t ever touch me again,” she growled. “I don’t ever want you anywhere near me.”
She leaped out of the bed, grabbing the top sheet off my bed to wrap around her body as she went. As she raced towards the door, I jumped out to join her. I couldn’t let her go until I’d sorted this out. I grabbed her arm, just to keep her in place, but she immediately threw my arm off of her and glared at me furiously.
“But I… I just want to talk…” I tried to make her understand, but she wasn’t having any of it.
“If you come anywhere near me again, I will start looking for a new job right away.”
We stared at one another for a moment, both panting desperately. Terror coursed through my body; all I wanted to do was start this over again, but it was too late now. The words were out there, and the damage was done. I had a funny feeling that anything that came out of my mouth next would only make it worse.
Olivia slammed the door behind her as she left my bedroom, almost shaking the walls as she did. I winced, slid my eyes closed, and found myself sliding into a pit of panic. Shit, how the hell could I make this right?
I shook my head quickly and snapped into action. The main thing I needed to do right now was get myself dressed for work. I might have had personal issues going on at home, but the office needed me too. I had to be there, so I got myself washed and dressed as rapidly as I could, with my heart racing the entire time.
“Dad!” Justine called out happily as I raced from the bedroom. “Do you want breakfast?”
“Erm…” I gave Olivia a look. No, she definitely didn’t want to make me any food today. Since I’d already pushed her too far, for now I felt like the best thing to do would be to let her calm down. “No, I don’t think so.” I glanced at my watch. “I have to get to work, but I’ll be back for dinner, okay? I’ll see you then.” I leaned across her and kissed Justine on the top of the head. “Erm, Olivia…” I couldn’t leave without saying anything. I didn’t want to go on a sour note. “Is there anything that you need? Do you want me to do anything for you?”
“No.” She wouldn’t even look at me. Something that had been so wonderful not so long ago was now utterly terrible. All because of me and my stupid big mouth. “I don’t. Goodbye, Mark.”
***
“I slept with the nanny,” I blurted out the moment I stepped into Holden’s office. The words had been brimming on the edge of my lips all the drive over and they simply fell out of my mouth.
Holden lifted his eyes slowly from his paper and gave me a look. “What the fuck is going on with you?” he demanded with a very unimpressed look on his face. “Will you quit coming in here with shit like that?”
I slid into the chair opposite him and leaned my elbows on his desk. Maybe he wasn’t impressed with my behavior; I wasn’t either, but he was the only person in the world whose opinion I could trust. I needed to know what he thought, and even if it was something that I didn’t want to hear, I had to listen to him.
“I know, I know, I’m a fucking idiot. Just after you told me to back off, but it just… happened.”
Holden shook his head at me. “No. Sex doesn’t ‘just happen.’ There are many steps to stop it.”
I shrugged my shoulders helplessly. “I know, I get that, but I didn’t stop it, and now I don’t know what to do.”
“Well, since it’s too late to advise you again to back away, I have to ask how it was this morning.”
I smirked, but I wasn’t too impressed actually. It stung me that Olivia was so furious at me when I had said something silly. She knew that I wasn’t that much of a prick, didn’t she? “She slapped me.”
Holden tossed his head back in amusement and laughed. At least he was finding in genuinely funny. “Oh, fucking hell. What did you say? Or were you just that shit in bed?”
A little growl flew out of my mouth. “It had nothing to do with my performance, thank you very much. I just made a stupid comment this morning that upset her, and now… well, not it’s a fucking mess.”
“Have you always been this smooth? Honestly, how did you ever manage to end up married?”
I sighed loudly and shrugged again. Talking about it was making me less sure of what to do next. “I don’t know. It’s all just… urgh, what the hell is wrong with me?” I shook my head. “What do I do now?”
“Man, you need to decide what you want next.” I flicked my eyes up to look at him. “Do you want to get rid of her?” I shook my head. “Get back to a professional working relationship.” I gave one nod. “Or do you want her? Because if you want her, then you need to figure out how that’s going to work. Like, are you going to be sex buddies? Professionals with benefits? Or do you want more? Because I haven’t seen you like this for ages.”
Urgh, I let my head hang forwards as I thought about that. I mean, I definitely did want Olivia back in my bed again even if it wasn’t wise. I’d just been telling myself that it wasn’t possible. I couldn’t believe that Holden was giving me the green light. Maybe there would be a cheeky way to have it all. It wasn’t right to think of combining work and pleasure, but if Holden didn’t tell me that I was crazy, then maybe it was worth it.
“Oh, I don’t know.” I raise myself up from my seat. “I better get to work and have a think about it.”
After my talk with Holden, I spent the rest of the day trying to work out what my next move would be. The thing was, I didn’t want to lose her as the nanny; she was fucking incredible at her job, the difference that she had made to Justine’s life was astounding. Absolutely off the scale. So good that I didn’t want to risk it. But, at the same time, I really wanted her in my bed again. She felt so fucking good next to me. Even when she smacked me in the face, I liked her there. It beat being alone anyway.
“I’m off,” I said to Holden once it got to the point that I couldn’t hang around much longer. “If that’s alright with you? Is there anything desperate that needs doing?” He shook his head. “Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Did you decide what you want to do?” he called out from behind me as I turned to leave. “With the nanny?”
I huffed and smiled to myself. “I think so. I don’t know if it’ll work, but I have to give it a go.”
“Yeah? Well, let me know how you get on. I’ll have my fingers crossed for you. And don’t come back in here blurting something else out shocking tomorrow. Although I don’t know what else you could do, propose, I guess.”
“Oh, don’t you worry about that!” I insisted. “This isn’t anything like that. You don’t have to worry about me getting married any time soon.” I twis
ted my neck to give him a reassuring smile. “That’s off the table.”
Did I protest too much? I didn’t mean to, but this really wasn’t anything so dramatic. My feelings were chemical, physical, that was all. Olivia was hot. I wanted her; she had a gorgeous body, and she was amazing in the sack. I didn’t want to accept, even to myself, that there might be something more.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Olivia
My blood burned through my body. I felt like I was completely on fire as I watched Mark leave. How could he say those words to me then act like nothing had happened? I didn’t expect him to argue with me in front of his daughter, but to pretend that he was a nice and caring guy disgusted me. I hated him. I wanted to punch him.
“Right, I’m ready for school,” Justine said brightly as her dad left. “I’ll just get my bag.”
I waited for Justine to get herself dressed and took her down to the car on autopilot. I was there in body, I even found myself talking to Justine, but my brain was off somewhere else. My head spun wildly; I barely even knew what was going on. It wasn’t until I watched the car pull away and Justine waved at me that I realized I probably should have said a proper goodbye. If this was going to be the last time that she saw me, then that was a shit farewell. I whispered a ‘sorry’ and a ‘goodbye’ to her as the car sped away, but it was too late then.
“Is everything okay?” Lincoln asked me as I raced back inside. “You look a little sad?”
That was putting it mildly; my eyes were wet with tears that desperately wanted to come out, but I couldn’t do it here. I nodded, unable to speak, and I raced towards the elevator. I felt silly, small, and ashamed of my behavior. I hated myself for screwing everything up. My New York City dream had been ruined by one night. I caved to the passion, I allowed myself to be led in a direction that I knew was wrong, and now I had to pay the price.
Maybe if Mark hadn’t been such a dick about it, I would be okay now, but the way he dismissed me as if I was some chick that he’d picked up at a bar for a one-night stand made me feel sick to my stomach. I was there… that was why he had sex with me. Not because he liked me, or he found me irresistible, but because I was in his home. I was easy, I suppose, and the worst part was I fell into bed with him, giving him what he wanted.