All I Want Is You

by Ms. Neicy

  “You have a beautiful home, Mrs. Waters.” I said, admiring the interior and exterior of her home. One day, I wanted something similar, but it didn’t have to be this big. I wanted it in a nice, quiet neighborhood with a big backyard and a pool. This home was definitely giving me life at the moment.

  “Thank you, baby. Have a seat. I’ll be right back.” She said, disappearing into the house. I walked off the deck to go by the other ladies at the pool. The closer I got to the women, the more familiar faces I saw.

  “Lisa, what the hell are you doing here?” I asked, surprised to see Lisa here sitting at this barbecue. Did her and Gisele know one another or something like that?

  “Hey Gisele, boo, how are you?”

  “I’m fine, how do you all know one another?” she asked, before Lisa had a chance to respond.

  “That’s my sister girl.” I said.

  “Oh, ok. That’s what’s up. Would you all excuse me for a moment. I’m going to run inside. Do you all need anything else while I’m in there?” Gisele asked, getting up from the spot she was previously occupying.

  “Yes, can I get a refill?” Lisa said. We all shared a laugh, and Gisele left giving us a second to ourselves.

  “Girl, what the hell are you doing here?” I asked, as soon as Gisele was no longer in earshot view.

  “Small world, huh? Girl, I’m here with Gucci.”

  “Who the hell is Gucci, and why didn’t I know your ass was dating?” I said. I was a little hurt that she hadn’t told me, and I had to see her out to know that she was dating.

  “I didn’t want you to look at me any different, because I’m not with your brother.” She said with her head lowered.

  “I told you; that’s y’all business. You will always be my sister. You don’t have to hide anything from me.” I said.

  “Thanks for understanding, sissy. I really appreciate you to the fullest.”

  “Yeah, yeah. Now, who is Gucci?”

  “What? You don’t know Gucci?” Gisele said sneaking up on our conversation. This time she had a beautiful little girl with her, so I assumed it was Renzo’s daughter Raven.

  “Hey cutie.” I said. She ran up and gave me a hug.

  “She must like you.” Gisele said laughing. She sat in my lap playing with my hair and my earrings.

  “Gucci is Renzo’s best friend. They have been best friends since birth. Hell, they are closer than Renzo and Marc. Those two there are crazy.”

  “Well, your brother gave the worst damn introduction back there. I didn’t really catch anyone’s name besides Marc, and that’s because he was sitting out front when we first got here.” I said. We all sat there sipping our drinks and talking, just getting to know one another, while Raven drove her little pink car around. Every so often, she would run up to me and give me a hug, and already, I was in love with her. She was such a beautiful, well-mannered little girl from what I had seen thus far.

  “Y’all come inside so we can bless the food and eat.” Mrs. Waters said from the deck. We all went inside and washed up. Raven wanted me to help her wash her hands, and I didn’t mind one bit. Renzo came and kissed me on my cheek, and we all took a seat at the dinner room table so that we could get ready to bless the food.

  “You all about to get started without me?” A voice said. I looked up, and the woman was looking directly at me.

  “What the hell are you doing here Jessa?” Renzo said. His voice was dripped in agitation, and I just wanted to know what the hell was going on.

  “Well, no thanks to you, because you didn’t tell me anything. Some husband you are.” She said. I know I hadn’t heard her correctly. Did that bitch just say husband? I knew damn well Renzo wasn’t married and dating me. That’s the same shit Wyatt did, but I wasn’t anybody’s side bitch.

  “Oh, you didn’t know baby girl. He is a married man. I hope that makes you feel better about yourself.” She said directly to me. I didn’t know anything about her, but I wasn’t gonna sit there and let her come for me. I told Renzo I wasn’t the one for drama, and I would stand my ground if I had to.

  “I did not know, and had I known, things would’ve never went this far, but thank you for that information, because it doesn’t seem like your husband was going to ever tell me that. Lisa, did you drive?”

  “Yes.”

  “Can I take your car. Just call me when you’re ready?” I said. I was trying to save the tears, because I didn’t want to cry in front of anyone, but boy were my feelings hurt.

  “I’ll have Gucci bring me. Here.” she said giving me her keys.

  “It was nice meeting everyone.” I said. I was damn near sprinting to get to the door. I couldn’t believe this shit. How in the hell had this nigga been married the entire time, and I didn’t know? That shit slipped right past my ass.

  “Wait a minute, Renee. Let me talk to you.” I heard Renzo say. I had just made it to the door, but I opened it and walked out anyway. I wasn’t trying to hear anything he had to say at the moment.

  “Renee, stop and let me explain.” He yelled. I didn’t stop until I made it to Lisa’s car, but the tears had already begun to fall. When I turned to look at him, he tried wiping my tears away, but I moved his hand. He was the reason for my tears, so what the hell? Damn near four months, and this nigga was married. I actually thought I could have a future with this man, and he was already someone’s husband. What the fuck? I felt so played.

  “What is there to possibly explain Renzo? Start at the part where you forget to mention that you had a fucking wife. OH my gosh, and I’ve slept at your place. Do you all share that bed?” I said. My thoughts were all over the place right now.

  “No, she doesn’t even know I live there Renee. All I want is you baby girl, but I need you to listen.”

  “Bullshit, nigga! You can’t possibly want me and you’re married. Look, I got to go.” I said as my phone began to ring.

  “I’ll be by there later, because we need to talk about this.”

  “No need; I won’t be there.” I said, shutting the door and pulling off leaving him standing there looking stupid. What a meet and greet that was. Pulling up to the stop sign, I placed the car in park and cried. I cried for being so damn careless with my heart yet again. I cried, because I actually felt bad for seeing a married man. I was never that type of woman, and had I known, I promise things would’ve never went this far. I cried, because I actually wanted Renzo, and I couldn’t have him.

  Men never left their wives for their side pieces, which is why I didn’t deal with married men or men in relationships. It was too many people in the world to settle for someone who already had someone else. After about five minutes of my pity party, I called my sister and told her I was coming over. It had been a minute since I hung with Madonna, but I really needed her right now. I would’ve made Lisa come to, but I wanted her to stay back and tell me how everything played out. I really couldn’t believe I had been dating a fucking married man. I was so over guys, and I meant that.

  Chapter 22

  Jessa

  When Marc told me about the dinner, there was no way in the world I would miss that shit. Renzo hadn’t taken my calls in weeks and seemed like the only time I really knew what was going on with him was when his little girlfriend made a post. I really wanted my marriage to work, so in order to do that, I decided to pop up and make him talk to me. Maybe, if I told him my truth, he would reconsider.

  I wasn’t at all surprised when I saw his little girlfriend sitting at the table smiling and shit, but I was surprised at how pretty she was. Her pictures didn’t really do her justice; she was a very beautiful woman, I would give her that. I was surprised when she stood up and said that she knew nothing about me, and I was even more surprised when he got up and went after her. I knew then, he had some serious feelings for this chick, because he was a very attentive dude. I could just look at him and tell. After all those years, I knew that man like I knew the back of my hand.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” Gise
le asked. She knew I didn’t care for her, so why the hell was she even talking to me?

  “Umm, I don’t think I owe you an explanation.”

  “Maybe not her, but me, you surely owe one. You come in here and disrespect my home as well as family. What is it that you need?” Mrs. Waters said. I didn’t too much care for her ass either. I felt like they all frowned down on me, and I didn’t like that shit.

  “I wanted to talk to my husband. I haven’t heard from him in weeks, and he won’t take any of my phone calls, so I came by to see what the issue was.”

  “You know the damn issue Jessa. I’m done with this damn marriage. You are not the same woman I married, and you don’t make me happy. I’m not willing to spend the rest of my life miserable. You can, but I won’t.” Renzo said.

  “Just hear the girl out.” Marc said, coming to my defense. I knew that wasn’t the right move, but he had already spoke his peace. I knew that was only going to escalate things, and I wasn’t really trying to do that. I really just wanted to try to work it out with my husband, nothing more, nothing less.

  “And who are you to tell me what the fuck to do Marc?”

  “That’s enough boys?” Mr. Waters said.

  “Nah, let this fool speak, because he obviously has something he needs to get off his chest.” Renzo said. Mr. Waters stood down. Mrs. Waters sat at the table shaking her head as everyone else looked on.

  “Renzo, you walk around this motherfucker like you perfect. You always coming up in here talking noise, but if it wasn’t for daddy, you wouldn’t have none of the shit you have. I’m sick of you frowning down me my nigga.” I knew, then, I should’ve left, but I didn’t, and I really regretted that decision.

  “Frowning down on you? Nigga, you a fucking disgrace. You lazy, you not doing shit with your life, you just over here living off momma and daddy money. You won’t take your ass to school to get certified for nothing, like what the fuck are you doing? You just wasting away lil’ nigga. We don’t have shit to talk about. I’m starting to think they switched your stupid ass a birth.” Renzo spat before taking a seat at the table. Marc was silent before he begin to laugh.

  “Here we go.” I said under my breath.

  “I told you about trying to act like your shit don’t stink. Go ahead and tell him Jessa.” Marc said. Oh, shit, oh shit, I didn’t come over here for this, I thought to myself.

  “I don’t want to do that Marc; just calm down.”

  “Fuck that shit, you better tell that nigga before I do.” He spat at me. I sighed and shook my head no. I really didn’t come by for this. All I wanted was a moment with my husband without any of these damn distractions.

  “Tell me what.”

  “Well, big brother, you not living in a fucking glass house, bruh. Raven not even yours.” Marc said, as he started laughing again. I couldn’t believe that nigga. Why in the hell had he done that shit?

  “Is that true?” Renzo said. He walked up so close to me I could feel the hair on my face standing at attention. From the look in his eyes, I could tell he was pissed, and I didn’t want to add to that. I just wanted to get out of here. Now, I felt like stopping by wasn’t such a good idea.

  “I asked you a question, Jessa. So Raven isn’t mines?” he said, putting emphasis on each word. At that very, moment I felt that I should’ve waited to have this conversation another day, but the damage was done, so I couldn’t do nothing but own my truth.

  To Be Continued!!!