After All This Time: Breaking Point

by Brown, Brittainy

  He checked the time, the meeting with the shrink was today. He had to leave quickly so he could meet her on time.

  The show he had been focusing on had ended. He wasn’t actually paying much attention to it, though, he’d just used that to keep Emily from asking him lots of questions, questions he wasn’t ready to answer.

  Picking up his car keys, he called her name but there was no response. Then he decided to go the same way she had gone.

  He found her lying on the bed, sleeping, her face turned to the side while her jetty brownish black hair spread across the pillow.

  He thought of waking her up but he kicked against the thought, instead walking carefully back the way he had come and finally out of the house, so that by the time she woke to find him he was already gone.

  With The Shrink

  When he got to the address he was given, he was surprised. It was not what he’d expected. He hadn’t expected he would go to a corporate office, for one thing. The receptionist was pretty in a red suit. There was a Bluetooth headset attached to her, but and she seemed friendly.

  “Welcome to Celina’s Eye. My name is Tracy, do you have an appointment with Celina?”

  Liam nodded. “Yes, I urm... her sister booked an appointment for me. Please check for Liam Stottam.”

  “Certainly. Please, while I look through, fill this form.” The lady handed him a document with a smile as she looked at the screen of her computer. “Please come with me.”

  He was required to supply his details, which he did without hesitation.

  “Alright. She is waiting for you through the door to the right,” Tracy said. “And please, take the documents with you.”

  Liam forced a smile and soon left for the room.

  “Hello Liam, please sit.” The woman said to him as he got in. There were piles of documents on the table, a large TV screen, and more chairs. The woman was old, but he could see she resembled the lady at the bar. Crap! He didn’t even know her name.

  “Lara told me everything. I later did some reading, and...” the woman shook her head, “you caused everything, and you are going to do more harm to your relationship if you’re not careful. Give me your hand, and the document.”

  Liam handed him both and she held onto his hand. She placed her right hand warmly on his right palm, then shut her eyes.

  “I see confusion, fear, heartbreak and mixed feelings. You were involved with someone before. She treated you terribly and because of that you are afraid of this new relationship.”

  Liam nodded expectantly.

  “You have lots to deal with, but you choose to ignore,” she said, opening her eyes and releasing her hand.

  “You will spoil every chance of happiness you ever have if you don’t deal with the past, Liam.”

  “So what do I do?”

  “It’s either you let the past go and delight in the present, or you let the past keep pulling you back and you lose that which you hold dear.”

  “But, I... I don’t know where Kate actually is, I don’t know how to confront her and ask her why she did what she did. She hurt me so badly and... I can’t stop thinking about it.”

  The woman smiled. “Do you still have feelings for her?”

  “No, not at all. That’s why I’m so confused. Why is it affecting me? Why can’t I stop thinking about how hurt she made me feel?”

  “When Kate broke your heart, did you heal completely before you got into another relationship?”

  Liam shook his head. “No.”

  “Why didn’t you?”

  “Emily was available, and I was scared of being alone and. I thought I needed someone to keep me distracted.”

  “So are you saying you might not have loved her before you got involved with her?”

  He thought for a while and then nodded. “Yes. Along the line, I began to develop feelings for her. She makes me happy.”

  The woman sighed again. “It is very important to heal before you rush into a new relationship. That way you can be sure that you have fully forgiven anyone who might have hurt you in the past and it will not serve as a hindrance to your happiness in the future. Your inability to deal with your past is affecting your relationship right now. if you really love this woman that makes you happy, you will tell her the truth but that will be after you have found a way to deal with your past and let it go.”

  “B… but... she has been so suspicious of me. If I tell her now, don’t you think it will ruin things?”

  “Think of how worried she must be, Liam. She’s a woman and she loves you. She must be so worried. You need to find a way to make things right before it’s too late.”

  Liam inhaled a sharp breath. Where was he going to go from?

  * * *

  “So, dear ladies, if your man has been showing these six signs that I just mentioned, it doesn’t necessarily mean you need to end things. Sometimes, you need to make him see the reasons he should fight for you and why you belong together. We all know that men can be tough, but the truth is, they also develop cold feet once in a while. When this happens, they chicken out and we start asking ourselves, did I do something wrong… was it the way I spoke to him? Did I laugh too much? Did I overreact? Am I over thinking things… and so on. I tell you, it can be really frustrating, but if you love him, you need to make him see you are hurting. You need to confront him. If he tells you what is actually going on with him, then you can choose to stay or to leave. You have to stand up and take charge. If he is not picking your calls, why don’t you try and surprise him with a call? Hold on, we got a caller on the line… hello…. who is on the line…?”

  Emily listened as the TV presenter went on and on… it was like the presenter knew what she was going through. She was finally watching the show recommended to her at the salon.

  When she discovered Liam had left, she wasn’t sad or disappointed, she was filled with rage and she began to think about several things. How he had hurt her and still left when she was sleeping? How was she even able to fall asleep? Why didn’t she lash out at him? She realized the T.V. was off and she had switched it on again until she realized the Heart and Soul show was on. She had never been a fan of the show before, but today for some reason the presenter was able to connect with her in everything she said, and she had listened to every single word. It seemed to calm her down a little bit and it gave her the strength to pick up her phone and dial his number.

  He didn’t pick the first two calls, and the third went directly to the voicemail. Checking the time, she realized it was just some minutes from midnight. She had slept for two hours! Well, she didn’t have enough sleep last night so it was quite understandable. She debated giving him another call but she changed her mind. The next morning, she decided. That’s when she would call.

  Reaching Out

  Emily couldn’t wait for the morning to break, by 7:00 AM, she was awake. She took a warm bath and started dressing. She hoped to catch Liam before he left for anywhere, but she took her time to dress up. She thought she needed to remind him of how beautiful she was, maybe that would set things right.

  When she left the house it was drizzling, but she didn’t care, she just had to see him.

  Ten minutes later, she was in front of his house. She could see his car was still parked, which would mean he was still around.

  She turned off the ignition and took another look at herself. Dipping a hand into her bag, she brought out her lipstick and applied it to her lips generously, then she shut her eyes and did something she hadn’t done in a while….

  “Please let it not be what I’m thinking, please let our relationship be good.”

  She had heard from several people that they felt better after saying a short prayer but she didn’t feel better, she actually felt more anxious.

  Taking a deep breath, Emily stepped out of the car and walked towards the front door. It had already stopped drizzling.

  The door opened immediately she was about to ring the doorbell. He noticed he was just going for his r
un as usual with his earphone and a bottle of water. She could see the surprised look on his face as he spotted her.

  “Wow! Babe. What are you doing here?”

  “Just to check on my boyfriend and spend some time with him since he has been so busy these days.” She replied, managing a smile.

  “I was just going for a run but you can come inside.” He replied, opening the door a bit wider so she could come in. He hadn’t even tried to kiss her…

  She went in and sat on the couch. The house looked clean, as if he hadn’t been spending much time there, if he had, it would have been untidy,,, but that probably was just her imagination.

  Liam locked the door and sat next to her.

  “You didn’t tell me you were coming, what if I had gone out.”

  She sighed, trying to control her emotions, “I would have gladly waited for you to come back, you know I still have your spare key.”

  He smiled. “Well, sorry I had to leave yesterday, you were asleep and I didn’t want to wake you up.”

  Emily smiled painfully. “Really, Liam? Since when do you not like waking me up?”

  Liam frowned. “What do you mean? Is everything okay?”

  “I should ask you that, Liam. Are we okay?”

  He frowned, “Are you okay?”

  Emily thought for a while, should she be gentle with this?

  “The question is if we are okay. Liam. I mean, are we still in a relationship or am I the only one in this?”

  Liam smiled and took her hands in his. “Baby, why do you worry yourself so much?”

  “Liam, please, I need to worry okay?” She snapped at him, “ I feel like you have been avoiding me lately, I’ve been through this kind of a thing before. I know the signs so please, just tell me what the problem is. I can take it.” She tried hard to blink back the tears that were now forming in her eyes.

  He sighed and pulled her closer to him. “Baby, I don’t know what signs you’re talking about and clearly, you have been thinking too much, you’re seeing signs where there are none. You need to take things easy.”

  “Okay. So, I need to take things easy?”

  “Yes.”

  “So, explain to me why you have not even kissed me since I got here.”

  Liam was quiet for a while, then he smiled. “Baby, believe me, everything is fine, I’ve just been distracted lately and I’m sorry, I promise to make it up to you.”

  Emily sighed as she stared deeply into his eyes. “I don’t want to lose you, Liam.”

  He brushed a hand through her hair and replied, “I don’t want to lose you, either. Everything is fine, believe me. I am still happy with you, and I still want to be with you!”

  Emily gave an exasperated sigh and leaned her head against his chest as he pulled her closer.

  “I love you, Liam.”

  “I love you, too.”

  Hot And Cold

  Emily was in the bathroom, humming to herself, just like she always did when she was happy. It was her second day in a row spending the night at Liam’s place, and everything was back to normal.

  She dried herself with the towel and finally stepped out of the tub. She could smell the aroma of whatever Liam was cooking…

  “If you don’t finish bathing on time, there will be no food left for you.” She heard him shout from the kitchen.

  “Ha! You wish! If that happens then I’ll just keep my good news to myself.” She shouted back, now walking to the kitchen barefoot and with only the towel tied around her.

  She hugged him from behind, resting her head firmly on his back.

  “Oh my God, something smells so good in here.” She said, sniffing.

  “Baby, are you really not gonna tell me the good news you’ve been hiding all day?” Liam asked, turning around to embrace her.

  “Nope.” She replied, shaking her head. “I will wait until dinner, which is gonna be anytime now.” Planting a kiss on his lips, she pulled away.

  “Not fair,” Liam shouted, as Emily laughed and walked away.

  She was glad that things were going back the way they should, back to normal. Maybe there had been no problem, after all, maybe it was all just her own insecurity. She had been comparing him to her ex and had started seeing things Charles had done in Liam. She knew she had to stop doing it. Liam wasn’t the cause of those problems, after all, they were her issues and if she kept comparing him to her ex, she knew things would get worse.

  She stopped in front of the mirror, looking back at her own reflection.

  “Emily, you need to stop thinking about Charles. He is not Liam! They are two different people!” She said to herself sternly. At that moment, she caught sight of the package on the bed and it brought her some relief. This vacation would give them the spike needed in their relationship, she thought. Some time alone with him in a romantic setting would bring back all the old feelings that must have been forgotten and then, finally, they could move in together.

  “Dinner is ready!” Liam announced.

  “Okay, coming chef!” She shouted back and rushed to the closet where some of her clothes were kept. She found the gown she had just bought for the evening; the dress was short and perfect for a dinner date. Liam had always loved her in something short, he said it made her legs more beautiful, with her being a tall lady. Well, right now, she needed to keep him falling for her all over again, and the dress was just one of the materials required.

  * * *

  Some minutes later, he was at the table waiting for her. Liam had no idea what she wanted to say but he was excited to hear it. He was finally getting a hold of himself and as the shrink had said, he just needed time off anything that would remind him of his ex. But he wasn’t ready to talk to his girlfriend about it. That was not an option.

  Emily came out of the bedroom in a short, greenish-blue gown which clung delightfully to her hips. Her lustrous curled hair was rolled to the top of her head, bouncing with each step she took. He smiled as she came closer, he could see a parcel in her hand.

  “You are so beautiful.” He said before she sat down.

  “And you are so cute.” She replied, sliding into her chair while he reached across to kiss her. The aroma of the enormous feast before her wafted into her nostrils, making her mouth water.

  She could see eggs, ham, and piles of fried potatoes.

  “Oh my God Liam! This is amazing! You know it’s not too late to become a chef right?”

  He laughed and shook his head. “No thanks. I only cook for special occasions.” He replied. Cooking had always been one of his hobbies, but he had never considered going professional with it.

  “Well, before we start, I want to make a toast,” Liam began, lifting up his glass of wine while she did the same.

  “This is to a beautiful woman who has been patient with me through the years, and to a beautiful love that will last forever.”

  They both smiled as their glasses clinked, before taking a sip.

  “So…” Liam began as he ate, “what about that good news?”

  Emily smiled. “You don’t want to wait till the end of the dinner?”

  “Come on, babe! You made me wait till dinner now you want me to wait till after dinner?”

  Emily laughed. “Okay, sorry. You’ve earned it so I’ll just spill it,” she replied, and took up the envelope. She kept smiling as she opened it and brought out a letter which she handed to him.

  Liam collected from her, half smiling and with a suspicious look. “What’s in it?”

  Emily said nothing, then, “Read it, Liam,” She replied, while she continued with her food, at the same time studying his facial expression.

  Earlier that morning, she had got mail from Outer Banks confirming their beach house, and she had been super excited about it.

  She watched as Liam opened the letter. His expression went from curiosity to…. nothing! He looked expressionless.

  “Wow! Nice.” He said with no excitement in his voice, before folding the letter and handing it back t
o Emily, who looked confused.

  “Wow!? Nice?” Baby, this is what we paid for and we are really lucky to have actually gotten the house, why aren’t you excited?”

  Liam gave a half smile. “Baby, I am, good job, okay?” He said, before lifting his glass to his lips and gulping down his remaining wine.

  Emily was quiet as she watched him. He was off again all of a sudden, just like the last time, but she said nothing. They ate quietly and she couldn’t help but wonder, once more, what the problem was. Why did he always do this to her?

  “Liam, what’s going on?”

  “Nothing, babe.”

  “Your face just changed, it’s like you are clearly not as excited as I am.”

  “Baby, sorry, you’ll need to excuse me, I just remembered there’s something I need to do.” He said coming over to give her a rough kiss on the cheek, then leaving.

  Emily watched him as he left the room and suddenly her appetite was gone, even though she had been quite hungry earlier. She could hear his car as he zoomed off. Her cutlery made a clattering noise as she dropped it on the plate.

  She felt weak all of a sudden. This was draining her, his being hot and being cold at the same time was making her feel like something was leaking out of her… like she was losing energy fast and she was just tired of it.

  She had just realized was he had something to hide, and she was going to find out what.

  That night she waited for Liam, hoping he would come back home. He didn’t. She was no longer feeling sorry for herself, she was just angry. Angry that after all her the time she had spent trying to make him step up, blaming herself for many things and trying to make things right, he still preferred to shut her out. Later on that night, she went back to her place, promising herself not to let this bother her.