by Bry Ann
“I get that,” she said trying to hide the sadness in her voice.
I wouldn’t have even known she cared if her body language hadn’t said otherwise. Her shoulders fell, and she looked down at the pool in front of her as he newly blonde/brown hair fell in her face.
“But anyway, what exactly did he say?”
“There was nothing special about the wording Alexa,” I laughed. “He just said ‘how about we move here to get a break from Logan’s crazy life and our pasts’. End quote.”
“Wow. That is so crazy. He like actually loves you. He wants to live with you. Who would have known Sam’s brief stint as a drug dealer would land you a boyfriend?”
“Oh my gosh Alexa,” I laughed. “Shut up. It’s your turn.”
“I punched a wall. I hate my dad, so I punched a wall. That’s how I broke my hand.”
I blinked three times. She said it so matter of factly.
“Your dad?” I whispered. “What does he have to do with anything.”
She scoffed.
“He has to do with everything, him and the only other person I hate more than him. Anyway, your man is approaching so I am going to finalize our flight arrangements with Logan. Are you still flying back with me?”
“Of course I am. I would never give this news to Logan or Sam over the phone.”
“Good,” she said before walking away.
I stared at the water as I thought about what Alexa said.
“Hey,” came a deep voice behind me.
“Hey Gunner,” I smiled and held my hand up to block the sun.
“Do you usually wear a t-shirt to the pool?”
“You’ll never see me in a bikini Gunner. Never ever ever.”
He laughed, before he could reply his phone rang. “Excuse me for a second,” he said as he walked around the corner.
A knot developed in the pit of my stomach. I got up and poked my head around the corner to hear what he was saying. I don’t know when I became so nosy, but I had to know if Gunner was getting involved in illegal shit again.
“What do you want?” he snapped to the guy on the other line. “Yes, and I told you I don’t do that shit anymore. I don’t care what you heard. I’m taking time off. I don’t care about the money. I have plenty of blood money. Keep yours.”
With that he hung up and I went to run away, but as I turned around I saw him put his head in his hands. He looked absolutely distraught. I couldn’t leave him like that. He could be mad all he wanted.
“Hey,” I said softly as I approached him. “Everything okay?”
He glared at me. His old wall was up, but he softened when he saw how carefully I was approaching him.
“I miss it Dana.”
He said it so quietly I almost didn’t hear him.
“Miss what?”
“My old life, self. I just,” he sighed. “I miss it. I don’t know I fit in with all this,” he said gesturing to the hotel.
“I… you’ll find your place Gunner. You will,” I practically begged. “It will all work out just please don’t go back. Please. I can’t stand by you this time.”
A tear fell down my cheek and I tried to wipe it, but Gunner grabbed my wrist and put his hand on my face to brush it away. Then he just held my face softly. I leaned it to his hand and closed my eyes.
“I don’t want to lose you; to jail, death, a conscious that can’t be saved, to anything. You’re my best friend.”
He pulled me into him and I wrapped my arms around him so tight he used his free hand to loosen my grip a little. He let me go and looked me in the eye.
“We leave first thing tomorrow morning. There’s some things we need to discuss before then. Let’s go up to our room. Okay?”
I nodded. He grabbed my hand and pulled me inside and towards the elevator. Once we were in he turned to me.
“How’s Alexa?”
“I have no idea. Honestly. She’s so hard to read. I hope she’s okay.”
“Did you find anything out about Rex and her?”
“No. I wish! Geez it’s killing me.”
“Me too.”
“Who knew you were so into gossip Gunner?” I laughed.
“Fuck off Dana.”
I laughed as we got out of the elevator and made our to my room, well pretty much our room now. I wanted to tell Logan to check out of Gunner’s room and save the money, but that would leave a lot of things implied and he’d flip the fuck out, so I left it. Logan had plenty of money anyway. The minute he entered the room and shut the door Gunner grabbed me and pulled me towards him for an intense kiss. I was a little blown away by his sudden passion. I could feel his erection pressing through my skimpy pool t-shirt.
“I don’t want to lose you either,” he groaned.
I moaned as he slid his tongue in my mouth and grabbed my ass to pull me closer. I swung my leg around his hip and he carried me to the bed quickly removing both of our clothes.
“I thought we were going to talk?” I laughed.
Gunner didn’t say anything until he was hovering over me, his forearms by my face.
“I can’t talk if I can’t focus. I need you Dana.”
I grabbed his neck and pulled him towards me for a kiss. Gunner slid a finger inside me, then two. He mercilessly fucked me with his fingers and played with my clit and my breasts. I moaned and arched against him, saying his name over and over again. I had no idea where this sudden passion was coming from, but I was loving it. He was careful but not gentle and I sort of loved it. I felt hot and desired.
He grabbed his cock and lined himself up with me. I stiffened slightly. I wanted it this time. We had taken steps to prep, albeit super-fast, but still.
“Are you okay?” he asked gruffly. The desire in his voice almost made me laugh. I put my hand on his face and nodded.
“Yes, I'm ready this time.”
He groaned and kissed me passionately. Slowly he began to press into me. I gripped his shoulders tight. I’m pretty sure I dug my nails into him, but I doubt he felt it. He pushed in a little more and I moaned in pain, in pleasure. I wasn’t sure what was happening to me. It felt like he was splitting me open, but my body craved it at the same time. I wanted him to slow down and speed the fuck up.
“Breath baby,” he whispered in my ear.
I took a deep breath and he gently pushed inside me the slightest bit more, filling me completely. I gasped and closed my eyes for a second. I know he hated that, but it hurt a lot. He stopped moving and rubbed my hair. After a little while the pain starts to cease, and I opened my eyes. I gave him a small smile and then he started to rock inside me, slow at first and then he started to pick up the pace. The faster he went the louder I became.
“Gunner,” I groaned. “Geez…”
Gunner smiled and slowed for a second as he brushed my hair back.
“Harder baby?”
I smiled at him.
“Show me what you got.”
I saw something in Gunner’s darken and he pulled out of me and thrust back in hard. I cried out and held onto him tighter. He continues to rock inside of me and I almost couldn’t take it anymore. Gunner let out a small laugh from above me.
“Let loose babe. It’s okay.”
He kissed my forehead and went back to rocking inside of me.
Pain and pleasure. Except for me the pain came from my mind. I constantly fought between my mind and my body, but whenever Gunner felt it he would stop and kiss my head, reminding me I was safe.
I feel that familiar pressure building again but my body wouldn’t let me let go. I was scared to let go and it was making me miserable. Gunner sensed it. On top of him rocking inside of me his finger found my clit and he began to stroke it. That’s all it took. He made it impossible to fight. I totally let go. My body was taken over by a wave of total ecstasy and pleasure. At the same time, I felt Gunner jerk inside of me and his body rolled off me. We both lay there for a minute sweaty and breathing deep. There was a long silence where neither of said anyth
ing.
“Well, it turns out I like sex,” I joked.
Gunner burst out laughing and rolled over, so his face was over mine.
“That’s a damn good thing, cause I like sex with you and you ain’t seen nothin’ yet babe.”
I wasn’t healed, not by far, but trust went a hell of a long way.
Present Day: Chapter 14:
“We didn’t get very much talking done,” I somehow managed out between breaths as I hauled our luggage out of the hotel.
“I know,” Gunner responded with a sly grin.
“Shut up asshole. We needed to talk.”
“We will talk in Nashville. We won’t stay their long. Don’t panic. We’ll talk first thing. K, Babe?”
I rolled my eyes and reluctantly nodded my head as Gunner grabbed the luggage out of my hand.
“Babe?” Alexa’s voice echoed from across the lobby. “That’s new.”
“You and Rex hanging out all the time. That’s new,” I snapped back as I saw Rex appear from around corner.
I could hear Gunner start laughing from behind me.
“I don’t know when you became so bitchy Dana. Gunner what are you doing to my girl?” Alexa quipped but I could tell she felt embarrassed. Good, because that’s how she made me feel when she talked about Gunner and I’s sex life.
Gunner went over to Rex and gave him a bro hug. Alexa and I just stood to the side while the guys had their moment.
“We’ll be back soon,” Gunner said sternly as he patted Rex on the back. “Thank you for everything. Honestly.”
“Don’t thank me. I didn’t really do anything. I’ll see you soon bro.”
Gunner nodded. I snickered. It was really funny hearing somebody call Gunner “bro”. The look on his face told me Gunner was not particularly fond of it either. I went up to Rex next as I saw our taxi approach. I gave him a hug and then pulled away and looked at him sincerely.
“Thank you for your patience with me. I was very scared and vulnerable, and you were very patient and the perfect gentleman. I couldn’t thank you enough.”
Rex gave me a sincere nod. He really had the kindest eyes. For the life of me I couldn’t figure out why Alexa hates him so much.
“I’m glad everything worked out.”
I gave him a small smile. Then we all stood around awkwardly waiting for what Alexa would do. You could literally feel the tension.
“Bye,” Alexa said curtly. “Thanks for fixing my hand.”
She stood there stiffly as she waited for Rex’s reply.
“You're welcome Alex. Sorry Alexa.”
“You can call me Alex,” Alexa mumbled before running in the cab. Gunner and I raised our eyebrows and Rex stood there with an unreadable expression. I could see the confusion playing behind his eyes.
“We’ll see you soon Rex.”
With that we followed Alexa into the cab and were soon boarding the plane. It was a very boring flight back to Nashville. So much had happened in Missouri and none of us were ready to discuss it. Sam met us at the airport.
“Hey guys!” she called.
“Hey Sam.”
She wrapped her arms around me in an affectionate hug.
“You okay?” she whispered glancing up at Gunner.
“I’m good. We are still officially together and it’s, uh, really good.”
I bit my lip. She stared at me for a second and my cheeks turned even redder under her scrutiny.
“Holy shit,” she whispered, but luckily, she knew better than to embarrass me. “We’ll talk later.”
Soon we all were in the car with Logan, Jazmine, Gunner, Alexa, Me and Sam. Luckily, Logan had huge fancy cars. It was super annoying to be followed by the paparazzi out to his car. I had almost forgotten about that aspect of my family life. By the time we were in the car I was super grumpy and annoyed. Logan saw it immediately. He was very used to my hatred of the paparazzi.
“What’s wrong Dana?” Logan asked tersely. He was not particularly happy about Gunner being here.
“Nothing, I’m … it’s just weird being back in Nashville. That’s all.”
I stole a glance back at Gunner and he reached over and squeezed my hand. We all met up at Logan’s house. Sam and Jazmine had made cookies so we all sat around the living room and nibbled on cookies as we made small talk. Alexa was out playing with Jazmine, her choice. She didn’t feel like chatting. The whole thing sounds cozier than it was. It was super awkward, between Gunner being there, Alexa’s voluntary absence, and all the unanswered questions about Alexa’s life that were now brought to the surface. It sort of felt like we were all growing apart. After twenty minutes of awkward conversation Gunner stood up and all eyes turned to him.
“Logan can I speak with you for a moment?”
Logan looked slightly, surprised but nodded and followed Gunner out of the room. Sam and I stared at each other with dropped jaws.
“What the heck?” I whispered.
“Seriously, the only thing weirder than you dating Gunner is Logan and him having a private conversation. I mean they hate each other.”
“I know,” I answered with confusion. Sam and I both stared at the doorway for a while before carrying on our conversation. I always forget how easy it was to talk to her. I told her virtually everything, except for the part about me moving. Logan deserved to know that at the same time as Sam. We have our differences, but he has always loved me and supported me. I owed him that.
Ten minutes later the two guys walked back in the room and the air between them seemed… lighter? Sam and I looked at each other with furrowed brows.
What the hell? Why was Gunner talking with my brother?
“Well, um, we should be going,” I said as I stood up. “It’s been a long day. We’ll come back tomorrow.”
“Okay, I wish you could stay here but I get it. It’s sort of weird now. I’ll see you tomorrow girl. Besides I better get my kid before one of my best friends disowns me.”
With that Sam strode out of the room leaving Logan, Gunner and me.
“Where’s Gunner staying?” Logan asked as narrowed his eyes at the two of us.
I took a step-in front of Gunner before Gunner got defensive. Logan’s tone was very threatening. His blue eyes were narrowed on Gunner and I could see his jaw tense. I wanted to hit him, tell him to shave and then move his stupid shaggy dirty blonde hair out of his face.
“He’s staying with me and you be cool about it Logan. You’re not my dad.”
A look passed across his face and he glanced at Gunner.
“Okay, see you tomorrow. I love you Dana so much. I hope you know that.”
Logan came over and wrapped his big arms around me in a tight hug and then left the room.
What the hell? He was okay with Gunner staying with me? What the fuck did they talk about?
I gave Gunner a confused look, but let it go as he took my hand and led me to the Uber I had already called. I sat in silence as several thoughts passed through my head. It took me a lot longer than it should have to notice we weren’t going to my apartment.
“Where are we going?”
“Oh sorry, my place. To get my bike. I don’t want to have to pay for an Uber every time we go somewhere.”
“I have a car!”
“I know Day, but I need a little freedom too. K?”
I relaxed and bit my lip.
“I’ve never been to your place.”
“For good reason,” Gunner mumbled.
I sat back and quickly let me thoughts drift back to Gunner and Logan and the paparazzi and my whole life. By the time we got to his place I had realized something I couldn’t believe I had never thought of before.
We thanked the Uber, paid him well, and got out. Gunner headed straight for his bike and I cut him off.
“Can I please see your place? Please.”
“You don’t want to Day.”
“Please, I need to see it.”
He searched my eyes and then nodded. He pulled his keys ou
t of his pocket but was tense the whole way to the door. Gunner lived in a very private part of town, no surprises there. The only thing that was surprising was the apartment wasn’t nice. I knew he had a lot of money from his drug running days, but he definitely didn’t use it on a place. Interesting.
Gunner opened the door and I followed him in. I don’t know what I was expecting but what I saw was not it. In the room was a bathroom, a chair and a bed. That’s it. Like I mean literally that was it. Absolutely nothing else. I glanced back at him and he gave me a firm but embarrassed look. He was actually nervous for me to see this. The emptiness of his life, his whole existence. I couldn’t take it anymore.
I leapt back into his arms and kissed him so hard. I immediately slipped my tongue into his mouth and he returned it with a kiss just as strong. We got lost in the heat of the moment, but eventually Gunner pulled back, breathing heavy.
“Are you okay? What’s wrong? You’re never this forward.”
He searched my eyes again. Once again, I practically jumped on him, my breath hit his face.
“I just realized something. Something big and I just love you so much. Make love to me. Please. Right now.”
Gunner picked me up gently, like I was a piece of glass then placed me on the bed. He looked down at me from where he stood and cocked an eyebrow.
“Do I want to know?”
“You will just please make love to me.”
Gunner took off his clothes and this time I wasn’t scared to look at him. All of him. That body made me feel real good last time.
With how quickly Gunner was able to take off his clothes he sure made an ordeal of taking off mine. He unbuttoned my sweater and kissed all along my stomach as my breathing picked up. He loved watching how my body reacted to what he did to me. It’s why he was such a slow, sensual lover. Then he shimmied my white jeans off, I had already kicked off both of my flats. As my pants slid down my body he used his fingertips to caress my legs, thighs and then my sex. I whimpered as he ran his fingers along the outside of my thong. I could feel how wet I had become, and I didn’t care. I didn’t care at all. I wanted him to know how he made me feel, what he did to me. His life was no longer empty.