Dissonance

by Drew Elyse

  “Something is going on with your brother. He’s been missing days without warning, he’s been late to appointments, some of his contacts have been calling up to me saying they haven’t heard back from him. I tried to talk to him about it, but he just brushes it off,” Dad rubbed his temples as he always did when he was stressed. I didn’t like where this was going.

  “I started asking around a bit, see if anyone else knew what was going on. A couple people have noticed him acting strangely. Finally, Joe in accounts receivable said something about it probably being because he was sick. Apparently, he saw Caleb struggling with a prescription bottle a few weeks back and had to help him open it. Has he said anything to you about being sick?”

  “Nothing,” I told him. “I’ve barely talked to him.” That wasn’t necessarily surprising for the two of us, but now I wondered if there was a reason I had not run into my brother more frequently.

  “That’s what I was afraid of. He hasn’t mentioned anything to me or your mother, either.”

  The weight of his statement took a second to sink in. When it did, I was shocked.

  “You think he made it up. And… what? That he’s just using?”

  Dad shook his head, looking defeated. “I don’t know. Maybe he is sick, but then why not tell anyone? Why evade my questions?”

  “Because he loves this company and would do anything to not jeopardize his chance of taking over when you retire,” I answered.

  “Maybe, but if that’s the case, his health needs to come first. His life is more important than this company.”

  “Not to Caleb,” I pointed out.

  We both sat there a while, silent in our shared concern, until Dad spoke again.

  “I’m going to try talking to him again. Come at him straight with the questions about his health. If he still won’t talk to me, I’m going to call in a private investigator.”

  “Why?” As concerned as I was, that seemed extreme.

  “If he’s sick, I want to make sure he’s getting the best treatment possible, that he’s really taking care of himself. And if he is using, I want to know. I want to get him help. I don’t want to lose someone else to that choice.”

  This was a tough topic for Dad. When he was in his twenties, his brother Brian died of an overdose. I had experimented with drugs a bit as a teenager. One night, I came home high out of my mind. I had never seen Dad so pissed. The next morning, he tore me a new one for being so reckless. Caleb and I had known that Dad had a brother that passed before we were born, but we had never been told how. That day, Dad finally told me the story of watching his brother waste away on meth. He told me about going to check on Brian when no one had heard from him in over a week, and finding him in his apartment, already gone.

  I never used again.

  After not fighting harder to get his brother clean, I knew Dad would never allow his son to succumb to drugs. If that meant hiring a private investigator, then that was what would happen.

  “I don’t want to jump to conclusions. We’ll take this one step at a time,” Dad insisted. “I just need you to deal with a couple things that have been slipping through the cracks on your brother’s end. I’ll get most of that work settled elsewhere, but can you just take care of the couple things I sent until I get another plan?”

  “Yeah, I can handle it.”

  “I know you can, I always have.”

  Suddenly, I knew this conversation was shifting focus.

  “That’s why I want you to really consider staying here, permanently,” Dad continued. “I know you love music, and I’ll support you as long as you want to pursue that. But, son, you’ve already rejected three recording contracts. Have you ever wondered if being a part of the music business is actually what you want?”

  Of course, I did. I wondered it all the time. Before that first deal landed in my hands, I never would have doubted that music was the only career path for me. After it all fell apart, I wondered all the time. I was only nineteen when that first contract came my way. Luckily, my dad knew enough lawyers to get the thing reviewed by a professional. If he hadn’t, I probably would have signed without realizing that I was relinquishing all rights to my original work. I would have no ownership of the music I wrote. If they wanted to hand my song to another artist, they damn well could. I threw that contract out the minute that was explained to me, the label did not take that well.

  Deals two and three came quickly in the first one’s wake, both with more ridiculous stipulations I refused to agree to. Deal two came with the requirement that I leave my band behind. They wanted me to be a solo artist with some hack studio band behind me. I had been playing with Josh and Tim for years at that point, I would not leave them in the dust. Offer number three came not long after our original bassist left the band to go to law school. The deal breaker for that contract was the bassist they wanted to add, some half-plastic, bottle-blonde who was there just to look good. Don’t get me wrong, I have no problem with the idea of a female bassist. The problem was that the chick could barely hold a beat alternating on open strings. What she had in marketability, she completely lacked in any musical skill.

  Now, we were all getting older. I knew Josh was starting to move towards settling down with his girl. Tim was anything but settled, but he had plenty of other prospects beyond the band. What our newest asshole of a bassist would do, I just didn’t care. As for me, I had a successful future sitting right in front of me, if I would just commit. I would always have a way to support myself and any family I built.

  I thought about what it would be like to have a music career. If it worked out, I would be on the road constantly, touring and recording. I thought about how hard it would be to leave Charlotte knowing I might not be able to see her for months. As new as this was between us, that still sounded horrible. Would I even be able to hold onto her if I was always gone?

  “I’ve been thinking about it a lot, Dad,” I admitted. “You’re right. I am starting to question if that business is for me. I just don’t know anymore.”

  “Look Logan, I’m not asking you to make a decision here and now. I’m not trying to persuade you one way or another. I just want you to know that there is always a place for you here. I know you’ve always thought of this place as your brother’s domain, but part of the reason I worked so hard to expand this company as far as I have was to be sure that I could leave something fruitful for both of you. You’ve done great work here, and it would be an honor to pass this down to you,” Dad leveled with me.

  I had never really considered making more of my career at Westfield Realty. Despite having my name on the door, Dad was right, I had always thought of it as being Caleb’s. Maybe it was time to reconsider my future.

  That image I’d had in my mind since I first picked up a guitar was changing ever since I’d locked eyes with a beautiful brunette weeks ago.

  A few days had passed since our first date. Logan was extremely affectionate, though he never pushed me to do anything after I stopped him the first night. Going back into the work week had been a little odd. Logan seemed reluctant to part with me all day, and to be honest, I was missing him a bit, too. He’d had to work late one evening, which resulted in him coming home in a less than stellar mood. At least, his mood was down until he wrapped himself around me and kissed me until I could hardly breathe. That seemed to be the easy fix. Even practices with the band seemed to require a pick-me-up from me for him to face.

  Thursday evening, I was in the living room reading, waiting for him to get back. He’d called to let me know he would have to stay a little late, but not too long. I appreciated the call, even though it was not necessary. He did that kind of thing a lot, calling or texting me just to check in. The simple attention was as endearing as any grand gesture.

  Logan came through the door a bit after seven, looking worn down. He dropped his briefcase on the kitchen island before looking over to me, curled up with a throw blanket on the couch. He instantly looked brighter, and that affected me beyond wo
rds.

  He came right over to me, laying the kiss I had come to expect on me. “It’s good to see you, angel.”

  I grinned at him, allowing myself to admit how anxious I’d been for him to get home to me. “Hello to you, too.”

  He looked down at the book I had been reading. “Are you busy?”

  “Not at all.”

  His answering smile seemed full of promise, yet strangely intimidating. “Good. Come with me.”

  I followed him down the hall and into his bedroom, getting a bit confused when we didn’t stop there. He pulled me into his en suit. My eyes grazed over the stone alcove shower, the his-and-hers sinks that broke up a sweeping vanity, and even lingered a moment on the massive bathtub, but nothing could hold my attention away from Logan. All I could think about was how desperately I wanted to feel his body against mine. Next to him, nothing could hold my focus. The degree of desire that he could ignite in me alarmed me still.

  Logan led me straight to the expansive vanity and effortlessly lifted me to sit on the counter. The way he could handle me like I was near weightless made me feel more dainty and feminine than I ever had before. It was the same feeling I got when he would put his hands on my waist and nearly engulf my whole torso between his fingers.

  A chill rushed through me that I tried, in vain, to attribute to the cool counter touching my bare thighs where my shorts did not reach. Pushing my thoughts out, I focused entirely on Logan as he prepped the massive tub across from me.

  While the hot water filled the tub and steam billowed through the air, Logan returned his attention to me. With molten eyes locked on mine, he sauntered towards me until he was settled tightly between my thighs. His hands ran whisper soft across my skin, tracing the curves of my waist. The tenderness of his touch had my breath sticking in throat. The soft kisses he pressed to my lips and along my neck only kept me breathless.

  “Come relax with me, beautiful,” he whispered against my neck, causing goose bumps to break out across my entire body. I tried to say yes, but it escaped as a whimper instead. I felt rather than saw that brilliant smile spread across his face in response.

  He pulled back and stripped off his clothes. Needless to say, I was enraptured by the sight. His muscles shifting and bulging as he removed the pesky clothes was mouthwatering. When he stood gloriously nude in front of me, his smirk told me that he was aware just how much I had enjoyed the show. His eyes ran over my still very clothed body. Realizing I was incapable of cognizant thought, he came to me and began lifting off my shirt. My bra came next, slipping off effortlessly for him. He offered me his hand to help me stand and inched my shorts and panties down my legs. He stood back up and immediately pulled me to him. I sighed at the sensation of his bare skin meeting mine.

  “What are you doing to me?” he murmured against my neck. I couldn’t respond, not that I had an answer. I was too lost in his heat, too overwhelmed by everything passing between us.

  Suddenly, my feet were out from under me as Logan lifted me bridal-style in his arms. There was no containing my embarrassing squeal of surprise, but he chuckled at the sound. He carried me not to the edge of the tub as I expected, but right into the water. He didn’t release me until he had lowered us both into the sultry heat. My skin stung at the initial contact, but it within seconds the water soothed me into a near boneless state.

  Logan situated me between his legs, laying me back against him. His solid length pressed against my lower back. The moment wasn’t sexual, though. Our touches were not heated or excited, but leisurely, caressing. I lost myself in the serene feeling until I became aware that it his soothing hands had stilled.

  “You stopped,” I blurted.

  His rich chuckle relaxed me even more. “Has anyone ever told you how adorable you are?”

  I shifted a bit. Would I ever get used to his compliments? In all honesty, I was not sure I wanted to. What if I did adjust and they stopped coming?

  “We need to work on that,” he stated. “One day, you’ll know how incredible you are.”

  “You really believe that, don’t you?”

  “I know that you are. I wouldn’t say it if it weren’t true,” he answered.

  “People do all the time,” I murmured.

  “Has someone done that to you?” He kept his voice level, like he was just curious, but I knew better. He saw my statement for what it was, a piece of the past I refused to talk about. I had given him an opportunity, and he’d jumped on it.

  I wasn’t ready to tell him that story; I doubted I ever would be. However, I understood that it wasn’t fair to keep him out completely, so I gave him something when I replied, “Yes.”

  There was a moment of silence, and I braced myself for the questions I would not be able to answer. I didn’t want to make him think I didn’t care for him. My past was just not up for discussion. It was locked away and needed to stay there, for my own sake.

  Logan surprised me. He didn’t ask anything else, just began firmly massaging my shoulders. He wanted to know more, I knew he did, but he let it slide. All he said was, “Never again.” The two words meant so much more to me than a barrage of questions would have.

  After a while, Logan lathered some soap in his hands. Figuring I was in the way, I started to shift to the other side of the tub.

  “Where’re you going, beauty?” he asked in the sultry tone that made me melt.

  The best bath I had ever had only got better as he began massaging the soap into my back and arms. When I was sufficiently sudsy and beginning to ache with the need for him, his hands came around to cup my tender breasts. I arched my back, pressing my hardened nipples against his coarse palms.

  Logan’s ministrations moved lower so slowly I felt sure I would lose my mind well before I felt his touch where I needed it. We had been moving towards this since that first night. He’d touched me through my panties the night before. It felt a little silly, but the slow progression made me more comfortable. As I sat in that tub with his hands running over my body, I was not afraid to take the next step.

  When he made it to the bottom of my belly, hardly an inch above my throbbing heat, the real teasing began. He kneaded the skin beneath his hands, sliding lower until the tips of his fingers skimmed over my mound. Just when I thought I’d get the relief I needed, he moved north again. On the third pass, I groaned in desperate frustration.

  He licked the rim of my ear, sending convulsions through me that nearly caused me to miss his whispered question, “Are you ready, baby?”

  The awkward mix of a moan and grunt that came out in response seemed to be affirmation to him. His hand finally trailed all the way south, making contact with my swollen clit. The pleasure that shocked my entire body was too much. It could not possibly be meant to feel so good. Nothing ever had before.

  Each circle his fingers made against me had me climbing higher and higher. When the rotations stopped, I uttered an agitated protest. He did not hesitate, though. His fingers moved down to my entrance, a single one slipping slowly inside of me. I thought when this happened, I would freeze or tense up. I certainly never thought I would push against him, silently pleading for more.

  Every movement of his finger, each drag as he moved it in and out of me, felt even better than the last. A second finger joined the first, stretching me and pushing the pleasure to near euphoric levels. The world reduced to the feeling of his fingers inside me, the sound of my wanton voice, his heavy breaths at my ear. I never wanted reality to come crashing back in again.

  His touch drove me higher and higher. I was rocking against him, nearly thrashing in the water, far past the point of controlling my body’s reaction. Logan relished my reaction, grinding the solid arousal against me. We were lost entirely to the sexual fog. All at once that building feeling burst, taking me over entirely. Everything was on fire. Like fireworks set off all around me, all throughout me.

  It took long minutes of lying collapsed against Logan’s chest pulling in deep breaths to calm myself back down. I
was hardly aware of anything but the feeling of being completely sated. Only when that weighted sensation left my limbs did I realize that Logan’s body was still tight and hot with need. As hesitant as the thought of trying to please him made me, I wanted to give that to him.

  Carefully turning in the water, I wrapped one hand around his straining erection. He instantly groaned and bucked into my hold. The look of all-consuming pleasure on his face galvanized me further. He’d focused all of the attention on me already, now it was his turn to receive.

  “You don’t have to–” he tried to say, but broke off on a moan.

  “I want to.” My voice was sure, and I was glad. I wanted to give that to him, I just wasn’t sure what would please him. “I’ve just never done this before.”

  With his eyes burning, he nodded and wrapped his hand around the one I still had gripped around the base of his cock. He squeezed my hand tighter and began moving it up and down his length. I watched through the surface of the water, captivated by the image of our combined hands pumping him. I didn’t know a man’s cock could be beautiful, but Logan’s was to my eyes. After a few more passes, his hand released mine and he settled back against the curved edge of the tub.

  I continued to watch my hand move up and down around him. His blatant power and masculinity was striking. Touching him riled me up more than even his devious teasing had. It was the sexiest thing I had ever experienced. I picked up speed, matching my rhythm to the raging desire that pulsed in my veins.

  “God… Charlotte,” Logan moaned. He pulled me into a searing kiss and I lost all sense but his lips and his hard length in my palm.

  Watching him succumb to the pleasure I was giving him was nearly as addictive as the thrill of his touch. The sounds he made no effort to control, the complete abandon on his face, the inferno in his eyes, it was all so unfamiliar and so incredible.