His Heart's Desire

by Kristi Ahlers

  She decided to leave the ring on. In the morning she’d return it to its velvet home, but tonight she needed this connection to her Braden, no matter how flimsy or tangible it was.

  A quick glance at the clock showed that it was going on early evening. Deciding to take a shower and spend the rest of the night watching television, Cat gathered her stuff and carried it into the small bathroom.

  The warm shower did little to chase the chill away from her bones. Her dreams and life seemed so hollow. After drying, she dressed in her comfortable sweats and a sweatshirt. She was turning off the bathroom light when there was a knock on the door.

  No one knew her here in Scotland, so she was confused as to who would be at her door. Not wanting to become a statistic of the too trusting and opening a door to a potential murderer, she called out, “Who’s there?”

  “’Tis I, Elspeth.”

  Cat yanked the door open, surprised to see the kindly old lady. “How did you find me?”

  “Tain doesn’t have that many hotels, my lady.” Elspeth’s eyes glowed with enjoyment. “My laird has requested that you return with me to Castle Ross.”

  This was indeed a surprise. “Whatever for?”

  “He didn’t like the sadness in your eyes when you departed. Since you left he, Alec and Katherine have been talking and they’d like to extend their hospitality to you.”

  “Tell Mr. Ross that I appreciate the offer, but I will be flying home tomorrow. There is no need to put yourself out.”

  “Why don’t you tell him yourself?”

  Braden stepped around Elspeth. “Please stay with us tonight. I’ve found something in the attic that you may find interesting. Sketches of Laird Braden Ross, circa 1295.”

  His words were too seductive to ignore. He didn’t draw her as her Braden did, but it would be a comfort to spend some time with his relatives. “If you’re sure it won’t be too much of an imposition?”

  “Lass, we wouldn’t be here offering if we didn’t want you to stay with us.”

  “Then I accept your invitation. Let me just get my bags.”

  Braden moved forward. “I’ll get those, lass. You and Elspeth get into the Range Rover.”

  “Come along, Catrìona.” Elspeth grasped her arm and led the way out of the hotel.

  Fat, wet flakes fell, quickly covering their tracks in the pristine white snow.

  Braden soon had her bags stowed in the boot and was climbing in behind the wheel. “Buckle up. The ride could get a little bumpy.”

  Cat secured her lap belt and sat back. “I want to thank you again for inviting me.”

  “I have a feeling that your Laird Ross would have it no other way. And you are welcome.” He glanced at the ring on her finger. “I see it fits.”

  Cat blushed at being caught wearing the family heirloom. She started to remove the band but Braden stilled the action by reaching out and covering her fingers. “Don’t! It belongs on your finger. It’s found its home.” He squeezed her hand. “Promise you won’t take it off?”

  The sincerity shining in his eyes had her speaking her promise aloud. “You have my word. And I will treasure this ring, always.”

  The drive back to the castle was bumpy but Braden drove it like a man in total control. Not once did she fear they would slip over the edge.

  Lights burned in all of the windows, making the castle bright and welcoming. Braden turned off the engine. He slipped out of the SUV and opened her door with a flourish. “Welcome to your castle, my lady.” He bowed low before capturing her arm to help her from the vehicle, then led her to up to the front doors.

  Before Elspeth could open them, they swung back with the help of Ciaran. “Oh, good.” He turned and yelled over his shoulder, “Katherine, lass, Catrìona has returned.”

  Ushered into the warm entry hall, she was quickly hugged by Ciaran and then Katherine.

  “I hope it’s okay but I have you set up in the tower room.” Katherine smiled as she led Cat to the stairs. “We’ll get you settled and then go from there.”

  “Please don’t go to too much trouble on my account,” Cat said.

  Katherine gasped. “Don’t be silly. We wanted to do this. We should have issued the invitation when you were here to begin with.” She tucked her arm through Cat’s. “The chamber you’ll be sleeping in was your ancestor’s when she visited. Legends tell that Catrìona loved fairytales and had grand dreams of finding romantic love, despite having lost both her parents and being fostered by her mother’s clan. The MacDougall was ashamed of her half-Sassenach blood, so quickly arranged for the wee lass to be betrothed to our Laird Braden Ross.” Katherine leaned forward and whispered, “Her dreams were answered. Laird Ross loved his wee bride-to-be and the hard and feared Scottish warrior doted on her.”

  Cat could well see Braden doing just such a thing, but didn’t say anything. She would have to be very careful what she said. Cat didn’t want to come off as a lunatic that talked to a centuries’ dead Scottish laird.

  They reached the top of the stairs and Katherine pushed the chamber door open. “You get settled and come down so we can share some things with you.”

  Cat found herself in a beautiful room. A canopy bed on a raised dais took center stage in the room. Colorful tapestries covered the walls and a cheery fire snapped and crackled in the stone fireplace.

  The chamber had changed since the last time she’d stayed here and she didn’t know how she felt about that. She cherished her memories even if she was the only one that knew what had happened.

  With a last look at her room, she turned and went downstairs where she found her three hosts sitting on comfortable, overstuffed couches in the shade of hunter green.

  “There you are. Would you like a glass of wine?” Katherine offered.

  “Yes, that would be nice.”

  Katherine poured her a glass and Cat found herself entranced by the firelight reflecting off the garnet-colored liquid. She took an appreciative sip and relished the fruity, yet woodsy, taste of the wine.

  “We’re glad that you came back, lass.” Ciaran lifted a bottle of beer to his lips and took a swallow. “You left in such a hurry that we really weren’t able to talk to you. You surprised us when you brought up the other Braden.”

  “I can imagine. I confess that I was rather desperate when I made this trip.”

  “Why, lass?” Braden asked the softly spoken question.

  She didn’t know what to say or how much to say. This family was incredibly giving, opening their home up to a complete stranger. Deciding she owed them the truth, but not willing to come across as a complete fruitcake, she opted to tell a partial truth. “I used to dream of a man and I did some research and realized I’d been dreaming about this castle. I hope you don’t think I’m nuts.”

  “Not at all.” Katherine came to sit beside her. “I had a feeling it was something like that.” She nodded to Ciaran. “After you left, we went to the attic and started poking around. We found some things we’d like to share with you.”

  Together, Braden and Ciaran hefted a sizable trunk over to the couch where she sat.

  “Have a look, lass.” Ciaran lifted the lid with a smile.

  A woodsy, spicy scent, along with wool and leather, drifted on the air. She leaned over the trunk and gasped. There were old tartans, knives, and what looked like perfectly preserved white heather. On top of all of that were two sketches of her Braden.

  In the first one it was only of his face and the artist had faithfully captured his strong visage. She fancied it was so lifelike that he would smile any minute. The second was a lot different. Cat could sense the love put into each line. This was a private moment between the artist and the man portrayed on the fragile paper. Without thought, she traced the lines of his mouth. She’d seen that sleepy yet replete look in his eyes after they’d made love.

  “What do you know about him?”

  Braden sat across from her and leaned forward. “I’m named after him. He was a well respected laird of
our clan. It’s not unusual for tales to remain of loved ones, but his life and story is rather unique.”

  Cat met his gaze. “How so?”

  “As you know, he was to wed a half-English lass named Catrìona MacDougall. Your ancestor.”

  Cat nodded. “Yes.” She looked back to the sketch and listened as Braden told his story.

  “They were introduced when they were children. Laird Braden found her to be charming and as time passed, friendship turned into an endearing love. He worried that her family would hurt his lass. You see, her uncle didn’t want her there despite her being their niece. Her cousins were cruel and teasing. Despite the lack of love, she was a warm and caring person. When she was of age, Laird Ross went to fetch her to his home, a castle she’d visited often. Before he left, he’d requested a spell be cast by a druid priestess to protect them on their travels. Unbeknownst to him, this woman had held affection for him and she arranged an ambush. Catrìona was killed. Laird Ross never got over the loss of his heart and did something remarkable at the time by handing over lairdship to his cousin, Alec, who’d married his wife, Meagan.”

  Cat swallowed. “He never married?”

  “No. He claimed that no other could hold his heart because it was dead and buried beneath the Scottish soil.”

  “How sad.” Cat stared out the large picture window at the back of the room. She had a clear view of the snow falling and the turbulent sea in the background.

  “Are you all right, lass?” Katherine asked.

  She swallowed the tears that threatened to fall. “Yes, just sad at such a tragic end to what could have been a very happy future.”

  The fire snapped and popped as Cat lost herself in staring at her Braden’s likeness. “Thank you so much for sharing your ancestor’s history and your family’s treasures.”

  She covered her mouth with her hands. “I should turn in, I have to catch an early flight tomorrow.”

  Braden stood. “Will you be okay tonight?”

  Cat smiled. “Yes. Thank you.” Looking at the modern day Braden caused her heart to ache. “Goodnight.”

  “Please, you don’t need to see me to my room.” Cat began her ascent and paused when she heard Braden.

  “Sweet dreams, lass.” He stood at the bottom of the stairs with a questioning look on his face.

  “You, too, Braden. And thank you.”

  Cat made her way up the spiraling stairs and breathed a sigh of relief when she finally reached her room.

  Resting her head against the wooden door, she closed her eyes. Her mind replayed the story she’d just heard and selfishly felt relief, knowing that Braden hadn’t married anyone else. At the same time, she mourned the fact that he’d lived his life alone.

  She went to her suitcase and pulled out her pajamas, donned them quickly and then set her travel alarm so she could get up in the morning.

  Cat looked out her tower window and watched as the snow continued to fall, making the landscape look as if it were covered with a coating of icing. The picture postcard scene with the lights from the village down below caused her to smile. The only thing keeping this from being a perfect memory was the fact Braden wasn’t with her.

  Turning, she made her way to the inviting bed. She slipped under the duvet and closed her eyes. She went to sleep praying that tonight, her last night in Scotland, Braden would finally come and visit her in her dreams.

  He never came.

  * * *

  The next morning Cat slipped downstairs, intent on calling a cab to come and fetch her to the airport. Braden had already told her he’d take care of her rental.

  Thinking that the others were still asleep, she entered the great hall which was the family room and found Braden sitting on the couch with a cup of coffee in his hand.

  “Thought to sneak out without saying goodbye?”

  Guilt pricked her conscience. That’s exactly what she’d planned on doing and that was no way to thank someone for their hospitality.

  “Don’t bother lying, I can see it on your face.” He indicated the couch. “Have a seat, I’ll take you to the airport in a bit.”

  Cat sat across from her host and waited. For what, she didn’t know.

  “Would you like some coffee?”

  “No, thank you, I don’t much care for the stuff.”

  Braden smiled. “I admit it took me awhile to develop a taste but thanks to exams at university and all night study sessions, I’m a regular connoisseur of the coffee bean.”

  Cat smiled. “Thank you again for inviting me to stay with you.”

  “You’re welcome. Tell me, where are you from anyhow?”

  A laugh escaped her. “I’m from New Orleans, Louisiana.”

  “Ah, birthplace of jazz.”

  “Amongst other things.”

  “Never been there. Maybe one day I’ll make a trip to the States and I’ll visit your home.”

  “Well, if you do, let me know so I can return the hospitality.”

  “I’ll do that, Catrìona MacDougall.”

  Braden stood and put his coffee cup down on an end table. “I guess we better get going if we’re going to get you to Inverness in time to catch your flight.”

  Cat followed, oddly sad to be leaving this castle once again. “If you’d prefer, I’d be happy to call a cab.”

  “No, you won’t. I’ll see you to the airport. Let me just grab my coat and keys.”

  Braden left her alone while he got his things. Cat went to the door and waited for him. She had her suitcase in hand when he finally returned with a wrapped package.

  “Here, let me take your suitcase. Happy Christmas.”

  “No, you can’t give me anything else. You’ve already given me enough as it is.”

  “Please, take this, I want you to have it but you can’t open it until you get home.” He gave her a devilish smile, which pulled a grin from her.

  “Very well, thank you very much.”

  Braden opened the door. “You don’t even know what it contains. Maybe it’s a haggis?”

  Cat shook the box. “Nope, not a haggis.”

  Braden laughed. “If you say so.”

  They both climbed into the SUV and the trip to Inverness was made in relative silence.

  They reached the terminal and Braden went to park.

  “No, you don’t have to do that, please just drop me off.” Cat moved to release her seatbelt and Braden stilled her hand.

  “I hope you find what you’re looking for, lass.” He lifted her hand to his mouth and placed a kiss on her knuckles. “Bon voyage, Catrìona MacDougall.”

  Her eyes welled with tears. Lord, when did she become such a watering pot? She hated that this seemed to be her natural reaction to just about anything and she couldn’t even blame the affliction on PMS. “Thank you.”

  Braden put the car in park and assisted her with her suitcase. He didn’t say anything else as she pulled her suitcase behind her and entered the airport.

  Before long, she was sitting by her gate waiting for her flight to be called. She watched as a crew de-iced the plane. She’d come to Scotland looking for answers and possibly a way to mend her heart. She came away with a few answers and the understanding that she was strong and could deal with the future. At least, she hoped she could. The call for boarding pulled her from her thoughts and she gathered her carry-on items.

  Thankfully the flight wasn’t a full one and the seat beside her was empty. She belted herself in and sat back and waited until it was their turn on the runway. As they took off, she said her final farewell to Scotland. After the plane climbed above the clouds, she pulled the shade down and closed her eyes. She vowed she’d make the entire flight tear-free. Her vow was not easily kept.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

  The ringing of her doorbell pulled Cat from a restless sleep. Her eyes burned from the copious tears she’d shed throughout the night, and a fair deal of exhaustion. She lay listening to the banging on the door, wishing whoever was on the other side to perd
ition. She didn’t want to see anyone.

  Pulling a pillow over her head, she tried to ignore the sound. How dare anyone interrupt her grieving? She’d just returned from Scotland and was suffering from a multitude of issues such as jetlag and the ever-present confusion and heartache. She’d promised herself one more day of a pity party before doing her best to get on with her life. At least, that was the plan.

  For a brief moment the cacophony of sound ceased and she breathed a sigh of relief. But it was short lived. The banging resumed and, with it, Cat’s temper rose. Deciding to murder whoever was on the other side of her door, she stumbled down the stairs, tripping over the suitcase she hadn’t bothered to carry up stairs the day before.

  She stood, her head pounding from the previous evening’s crying jag, and made her way to the front entry. Fearing she looked like an extra from Night of the Living Dead, she swung the door open. “What?” She stood agape. Standing on the other side was the very last person she thought she’d see, or wanted to set eyes on for that matter.

  “What are you doing here?” She heard the venom dripping from each word. Cat was stunned to realize how badly she wanted to cause Morgana physical damage. Cat was not a violent person by nature.

  Morgana offered her a smile. “You look like hell.”

  “Since that’s where you’ve all but consigned my life, I would say that’s an appropriate description. Thanks for stopping by with your input.” Cat tried to shut Morgana out, but she stopped her.

  “Wait.”

  Cat closed her eyes and rested her head against the door. “Haven’t you done enough already?”

  “I think I have something to tell you that you’ll want to hear.”

  “You have nothing to say that I want to hear. Go away and destroy some other helpless person. Leave me alone.” She tried to close the door once again.

  “I wouldn’t be so sure.” Morgana pushed the door open. “Please, hear me out.”

  “Why should I?” Cat challenged.

  “Because I want to make this right.”

  “Right. Let me guess, you were visited by the ghost from Christmas future and you’ve had a total change of heart? No?” Cat laughed as Morgana narrowed her eyes at her. “Hmm. So tell me, why now? Why would you want to help me now? You were so proud of yourself last week.”