The Way You Love Me: A High School Bully Romance

by Lannah Smith

  Skull latched onto John's arm and pulled him away from Leon. "Just walk away, John," he ordered.

  "Walk away?" John laughed. "We always keep walking away when bad shit happens to Leon. That's why he's growing to be a stubborn fucker. We always let him get his way."

  "John—" Skull tried again.

  But John had enough.

  He had fucking enough.

  "I watched him be miserable. For years, I watched him spiral down into depression and everyone watched as I got my hands dirty just to finally watch him be happy. I didn't care if I got my goddamn happy ending. I wanted him to have it. And you know, Skull. You damn well know what I had to sacrifice for him."

  Skull's eyes glittered and he looked away, swallowing hard. John's angry gaze returned to Leon.

  "I love you like a brother, Leon," he said, his voice growing rough because his throat was growing tight. "I care for you because I consider you as family. I let you walk all over me and I let you do your worst on me because you had enough heartbreak in your life. You didn't need any more. I was willing to do anything for you but this," he pointed at the floor, "this, I didn't want to be a part of."

  Leon stared at him.

  And when he spoke again, his voice had grown soft and rough with emotions too.

  "I'm sorry, John."

  "I don't need you to apologize to me," John said quietly. "I want you to apologize to the heartbroken girl who's probably crying her eyes out in my... in Terry's arms. But you won't do that, will you?"

  Leon's gaze dropped to the ground and John got his answer.

  He stepped back, shaking his head.

  And ignoring Skull's concern, he pushed away from them and pulled the door open, slamming it behind him.

  He thought it was Skull who followed him out. But it was Rohan.

  "Walk away, kid," he growled at him.

  Rohan stopped but he didn't walk away. He looked at John, his hands deep in his pockets.

  "I'm sorry," he said.

  John's face hardened. "Too little too late, Rohan."

  "Look, I didn't do this as another scheme to get Leon and Sophia to break up," he said in frustration. "I did this because Leon asked me to."

  He didn't give a fuck. He turned to enter his truck. "Just fucking walk away."

  "They've divorced."

  John's gaze jerked back to him.

  "My mother and the doc." Rohan slid his gaze away, his expression dark. "They've divorced last week."

  "Jesus, Rohan—"

  "I needed something to get that off my mind." Rohan's eyes went back to him and they had tears in them, tears he was trying his damnest to hold back. "And I didn't want to hurt Sophia. Not like that. You know I regretted the first time I hurt her. I was just so damn miserable. And I still am."

  John closed the distance between them and wrapped his arms around his friend. Rohan stood still, not wanting to be comforted but in the end, the fight went out of him and he rested his forehead on John's shoulder.

  "I'm sorry," John muttered, patting his back. "Fuck, I'm sorry, Rohan. You and Leon just make me so angry."

  Rohan was silent for awhile.

  Then he asked, "Will you fix this?"

  John looked at Leon's house. His jaw clenched, he told Rohan.

  "Of course I will."

  There was something about misery that was strangely contagious.

  And there was something about being happy and seeing the people you care for hurt inside that didn't feel right.

  I looked at Sophia poke at her lunch, the sadness prominent on her beautiful face. Thinking that bringing her to the school field, away from people and their gossiping mouths, would help her feel at ease, I had her sit with me on a bench and try to distract her from Leon by trying to get her into a conversation.

  "Do you want to visit Hannah with me after school?" I tried again.

  She didn't answer. She just continued poking at her salad.

  "Are you listening Sophia?"

  She finally looked up at me. "What?" she mumbled, blinking rapidly.

  I sighed and put down my yogurt. "I was asking if you would like to visit Hannah with me after school."

  I watched with exasperation as she slowly comprehended my question.

  "I'm... I don't know," she muttered, poking at her salad again. "I might catch her cold."

  "Knowing her, she probably just said that so she could have a head start on her vacation," I scoffed. "She's probably just watching chick flicks while eating junk food at home."

  She hesitated, then said, "I'll think about it."

  I fought the urge to groan. Instead, I swallowed a spoonful of yogurt and looked at the guys playing soccer on the field.

  Dang, but Sophia was hard to comfort.

  I wasn't good at this thing. It should be Hannah right here doing this comforting job but she'd been unusually busy these days, always going home right after class. And now that exam week was over, she'd disappeared like a bubble but still managed to send me memes through chat.

  Sophia suddenly latched on my arm and my gaze jerked to her. Her wide, scared eyes were focused on something and I followed her gaze. Then my gut tightened. John was standing a few feet away from us, his hands inside his pockets.

  It wasn't his presence that had my gut tighten up, no.

  It was his face.

  His tired and miserable face.

  God, what had Leon done to them?

  "I was hoping I'd catch you alone," John muttered as he approached and Sophia seemed to have stopped breathing.

  I knifed up and put myself between them. She didn't need this. Not now when her pain was still so fresh. "What are you doing here, Steele?" I said, injecting animosity in my tone.

  John's footsteps stilled. I could see the longing in his eyes but they vanished when he said, "I want to talk to Sophia."

  "She doesn't want to talk to you."

  A hard edge crept into John's voice. "She can tell me that herself, can't she?"

  Sophia stood and for some reason, pulled me away from him.

  "Get lost, Steele," I scowled.

  Hasn't his best friend done enough?

  "You get lost, Evans. This is none of your damn business."

  My head jerked back as if he struck me.

  He knew what his words did to me. But he powered on.

  "Sophia, please." John said to her, his voice turning gentle and beseeching. "One minute. That's all I ask. Let me just talk to you for one minute. Please. You have to hear what I have to say."

  "I'm sorry, John," she said quietly. "But I just want to be left alone."

  "Please, Sophia. You have to know why Leon—"

  "She said no, didn't she?" I snarled. "So, fuck off."

  John turned angry, hard eyes on me. I stared defiantly at him. This was our first encounter for weeks and it was hurting me so much that it had to be this way.

  But Sophia needed a clean break. That was what Leon had promised me.

  And if Leon wanted her back it should be him right here, right now, not John.

  "I-I'm sorry. I'm sorry, John." Sophia began to sob as she placed herself in front of me. I grabbed her shoulder to try and pull her back but she resisted. "S-She's just trying to protect me. She didn't mean what she said."

  "What the hell are you talking about Sophia?" John asked, startled.

  "Don't hurt her," she rambled on, dissolving into tears. "Please don't hurt her. Just go away. Please, please go away."

  Pain rippled across John's face and I felt an unpleasant weight hit my gut.

  "I'd never hurt her," he whispered to Sophia. Then his eyes went to me. "I'd never hurt you."

  My fingers involuntarily tightened and trembled around Sophia's shoulders as I tried not to cry. John looked like he wanted so say something more but decided not to. With a shake of his head, he walked away and I so badly wanted to run to him.

  "Terry, what's wrong?" Sophia asked in alarm.

  I looked at her. "Nothing," I said, swallowing hard
and sliding my gaze away, blinking back the tears. "I was... I was just touched by your show of protectiveness." I looked back to her and wiped the tears off her face. "But I can protect myself, Sophia. You only have to take care of yourself, you hear me?"

  She nodded. Letting out a shaky breath, I sat down on the bench again. That encounter had shaken me emotionally, making my knees weak.

  "I'm... I'm going to the toilet," Sophia told me.

  I started to rise. "I'll go with you."

  She quickly shook her head. "No. I'll be back right away."

  I stared at her, trying to discern if she was going to be fine and deciding that she was. Then I leaned back and said, "Fine."

  The second Sophia disappeared from view, I got up and ran as fast as I could. John was still in the parking lot, going to his truck and I called out to him.

  "John!"

  He glanced over his shoulder and saw me. Then he shook his head once, turned and lifted a hand up. "Stop. Stay there."

  My heart stopped beating before I even could slow to a stop. Terror seized me and I wrapped my arms around my body, feeling cold all of a sudden.

  Was he... Did he not want me anymore?

  Planting his fists on his hips, John looked at the ground, sighing.

  Then he said, "I'm sorry. About what I said earlier. I was just pissed. You know I say bad shit when I'm pissed. Fuck, I'm so sorry. I'm just so stressed out."

  He was. I could see it in his face.

  "John..." I tried to take a step forward but he lifted his hand up again.

  "Baby, please don't. I'm trying to keep my promise to your brother."

  Relief flooded into my system and I started to smile. "Yeah, but the thing is-"

  "And when it's over." He looked at me. "When all this shit's over, you bet your pretty ass I'll be on your doorstep, begging you to take me back."

  I blinked. "Begging? Why would you be beg—?"

  "I'll be a better person," he interrupted me yet again and I choked back my irritation. "I'll be a better son, a better student, a better boyfriend so I'll be worthy of you. You deserve that. No more hiding, no more making you second place. No more making you cry."

  He began to pace and I watched him, trying not to smile.

  John was so passionate (and loud) about his declaration he did not notice Skull and Rohan hiding behind his truck, taking a video.

  Blackmail, Skull mouthed at me.

  I almost lost the battle with my smile but then John stopped pacing and turned to look at me.

  "And Screw Haru. I'm not going to wait until next year to take... no, beg me to take you back into your life."

  "Why do you on saying that you'll beg me to take you back?" I finally could ask without him talking over me.

  But I wasn't sure if he had heard. His attention had been taken by muffled laughing from behind his truck and he whirled around, trying to see who was making that noise. When he couldn't find Skull or Rohan, they had successfully scampered to the bushes, he turned back to me.

  "So until then, wait for me okay?"

  I think I confused him when I smiled widely. "Alright."

  He frowned at me, like he was suspicious of the fact that I had agreed easily.

  "I know I don't deserve to say that but please wait for me," he went on, still frowning suspiciously at me.

  "I won't," I promised.

  He stared at me some more, trying to discern if I was lying or not.

  "Right," he finally muttered. "I have to go."

  I waved at him and it made him even more confused. Shaking his head, at me or at himself I wasn't sure, he went to his truck and got inside. Looking back once to see if I was there, he turned his truck on and drove off. He gave me a raised hand flicked out to the side as he drove past and I kept waving.

  I let him leave, knowing that he'd come back to me soon.

  I let him go, my mind at peace, knowing that he wasn't going to break up with me, knowing that despite the revelations, he wasn't going to change his mind about me, about us.

  My life was going to be fine from now on.

  My future was set for happiness.

  But if that jerk makes me wait too long, I would hunt him down and he would be hearing me taking him back over the sound of my fists meeting his skin.

  "Are you really going to give Leon the silent treatment for the rest of your life?"

  John didn't answer Skull, he was trying to back away from these nasty zombies while firing at them.

  He, Skull and Rohan were at Skull's house, playing video games. His asshole best friend wasn't with them. Leon was at the cemetery with his father, visiting Maria's grave since today was her death anniversary. And yeah, John checked. He was mad at Leon for doing shit but he couldn't just not check on his best friend.

  Fortunately, Leon's father was accommodating enough to answer his texts.

  Unfortunately, it meant that he had to suffer the insufferable father's lengthy replies about forgiveness and friendship that John bet were just quotes Nick searched on Google.

  Not to mention the calls he received from him and James about beating up another guy. His ears were still ringing from the dress-down he received from them. It was like he was the person responsible for that crap when it was their precious Leon.

  Still, John wouldn't have minded suffering. What he didn't like was it had to be Sophia who had to have the worst of it all.

  John felt a tap on his shoulder. Rohan was leaning slightly forward with his elbows on the back of John's chair.

  "Skull asked you a question," he told John when he looked at him. "And you're dead."

  "What?" John returned his gaze at the screen. Sure enough, he was dead. "Hell, Rohan."

  "My turn," the kid said eagerly. "Get up."

  John let him have the controller with a sigh.

  "You've forgiven Rohan," Skull pointed out when John joined him on the couch. "Why can't you forgive Leon?"

  "Rohan's a kid. He doesn't know what he's doing since he has very bad role models," John mumbled and Rohan gave him a glare.

  Skull's lips tipped up and he patted his shoulder heavily. "You should forgive him. In fact, you should have forgiven him yesterday since it was Christmas. Christmas is not only the season for giving but it is also a time for forgiving, you know."

  John chuckled. "I already gave him a present. I had Vincent deliver him ugly reindeer sweatshirts. Hey, did you memorize that off a gift card?"

  Skull smiled flat out at that and mumbled, "Maybe."

  "And I'm giving Leon until this weekend. Then I'll give him a good beating."

  "If Nick finds out he's going to kill you."

  John shrugged. "We have safe houses all over the country. I doubt he'll find me even if he's the best bounty hunter in the world."

  Skull laughed and John wanted to tell him he was not kidding. One way or the other, he was going to change Leon's decision and have him go begging to Sophia too. Only, it was the holidays and today was even the death anniversary of Leon's mother so John figured it was safest to thrash Leon's ass before his birthday.

  Unless Sophia goes away for vacation. That would definitely ruin his plans.

  Skull handed him a bag of chips. "How's Terry, anyway?"

  John stared at him. Skull's face was amused but his eyes were intense. He was worried, good at hiding it but still concerned. John didn't know what to do with that. Still, he was glad Skull got his back.

  "She's fine," he said and he wasn't lying. After what Haru told him, he didn't doubt she would. "But I'm not talking to you about her. Or our relationship, for that matter."

  "Why not?" Skull seemed offended.

  He gave him a look. "Skull, you practically know everything there is to know. And for the last time, I'm not telling you what Haru and I talked about in the library. That's between us."

  "I was just going to ask when you're going to stop being a pussy and just take her back already."

  "Fuck you. It's not that easy."

  Skull's face
got a teasing light flared in his eyes when he said, "Careful there. You're talking to the guy who comforted your girlfriend twice when you made her cry."