by Brower, Dawn
“My gown is over there.” Lady Anne gestured toward the folding screen in the corner of the room. “Retrieve it, and we can begin.”
Natalia did as Lady Anne ordered. The gown she’d set aside to wear for dinner wasn’t as elaborate as a ball gown, but was still quite pretty. It was white silk with a cherry velvet overlay and tiny pearls sewn around the bodice and down toward the waistline. The soft texture was decadent, and Natalia almost felt the need to pet it in admiration. She didn’t have too many fine gowns herself and would love to one day have one as exquisite as Lady Anne’s.
Natalia lifted the dress and carried it over to her. She held it open for Lady Anne to step into, then lifted it up to her waist so she could slip her arms into the small velvet sleeves. “Do you think he’ll like it?” Lady Anne asked as she trailed her fingers over the low bodice. “I had it made with him in mind.”
Natalia didn’t know the gentleman in question, but she could guess that the design would, at the very least, appeal to his lustier side. “He’ll likely appreciate the, um…quality. It’s quite beautiful.” She didn’t want to say it might also double as a costume a high priced courtesan would don. Either way, the gown was gorgeous, even if it showed more of Lady Anne’s attributes than she personally would like to gaze upon.
“He does appreciate pretty things,” she agreed. A coy smile filled her face. Lady Anne was probably betting on the gentleman finding her appealing too…
Natalia finished fastening the hooks on the back of the gown. “There,” she said and blew out a breath. “All done. Now, where did you want me to deliver your letter?”
She didn’t want to pick up the letter until she was ready to leave. The perfume had already choked her once, and she’d have to hold her breath as she exited so it wouldn’t do so again. After she knew where to deliver it, she’d get rid of it as soon as possible. Hopefully she wouldn’t have to keep it in her possession too long.
“His room is in a different wing than mine.” She tapped her chin thoughtfully. “I wonder if it’s the family section of the house? I seem to be on this end all on my own. I haven’t noticed anyone in the hall.”
She probably hadn’t left her room much since they arrived. Lady Anne liked socializing when there was someone around to notice her, but she didn’t do small crowds. She wanted as many admirers surrounding her as possible. The house party already didn’t provide her the attention she desired so she wouldn’t attend anything other than the group gatherings. The one exception to that was her planned tryst. That was meant to be more intimate…
“I wouldn’t deign to know the answer to that,” Natalia responded dryly. She honestly didn’t care. “What wing, and where is his room located inside of it.”
“It’s the wing facing the garden,” she told her. “His room is the one in the middle with a red door.” Lady Anne shrugged. “The servant assured me it was easy to locate.”
Great…how wonderful. She had the worst directions possible, and Lady Anne didn’t think the gentleman’s name was important. Maybe she should just ask her. She had her reasons for not probing, but it was getting rather ridiculous. On the other hand, how many rogues could be in attendance anyway? They all were probably the worst sorts… Well, it would serve Lady Anne right to get the wrong one’s attention. She’d find a husband, but it might not be the one she’d hoped to trap.
“I’ll see it reaches your intended.” Natalia nodded at her then went over to the vanity to retrieve the letter. She sucked in a breath, snatched it, and then rushed out of the room and went to hers. Her room wasn’t as large as Lady Anne’s, but she didn’t care. She still managed to find a place to store the elicit note so it didn’t offend her nose and she could breathe properly. Later on, she’d deliver it, and then the next day, if all went well, her mission would be complete. She’d know where to find Callista, and then she could escape to America. To her, nothing sounded better…
Chapter 4
Candlelight illuminated the drawing room, giving the impression of tranquility. Lucas rubbed his hands against his pant legs. The blonde lady had come in a while ago, but the woman he wanted to see, to talk with, to hold… That lady hadn’t deigned to make an appearance. They would be called into dinner soon, and Lucas had no appetite. Why should he bother with going through the motions? He had hoped Lia would be there and the effort would have made sense. What he really needed was a drink. If he had to suffer through socializing, he might as well do so inebriated.
“Hello, my lord,” the blonde lady said. He’d been so lost in thought he hadn’t noticed her approach. Something about her was familiar, but he was having trouble placing her.
“Hello…” Lucas lifted a brow. Damn he wished he could recall her name. He had to have met her at some point. “Lady…”
“Anne,” she supplied. “We met at the Loxton ball a few years ago. Well, more than that actually…”
He wished that had jogged his memory, but nothing came to him. That didn’t matter though. It would be to his benefit if she didn’t realize he had no idea who she actually was. There was something she could do for him though. Lady Anne had arrived with Lia, so she must have information on her. “The Loxton ball is usually a crush.”
“You’re quite right. It’s one of the most popular balls of the season. You didn’t attend this year.” Lady Anne smiled brazenly. Lucas held back a cringe. “I’m certain the function you attended instead was more favorable though.”
He was probably at the club getting foxed. “I can’t say one way or the other.” Lucas had to steer the conversation in the direction he wanted to take it. “You arrived earlier. I trust your trip was uneventful.”
“Of course,” she answered. Lady Anne practically twirled in place. “I like to take my time and travel slowly. It makes a trip more bearable.”
Lucas reminded himself to have patience. He had hoped she would offer information about her traveling companion without him prodding her. That didn’t seem likely to happen by her last statement. She said I and not we, which implied she traveled alone. Lucas knew otherwise because he’d caught a glimpse of Lia with her exiting the carriage. He had to figure out how to get Lady Anne to discuss her traveling companion without outright asking. “I’ve never had the patience to take my time traveling. I prefer reaching my destination as quickly as possible. I commend you your fortitude.”
“I’ve found the best things are worth waiting for,” Lady Anne said with a hint of boldness in her voice. He should find her forthright attitude surprising, but at this juncture in his life nothing did anymore. “Though I can see the appeal of immediate gratification.”
Lady Anne was flirting with him. A part of him was flattered, but he had no interest in her. He should make his intentions clear; however, he hadn’t gotten the information he needed from her yet. Maybe a little flirting would aid his cause. Besides, Lady Anne seemed a little too skilled at playful banter. She probably talked in such a manner with all the gentleman she crossed paths with, or maybe he was hoping she did so he had an excuse to use her for details regarding Lia. “What brings you to Weston Manor?”
“The house party of course,” she answered. She nibbled on her bottom lip, then glanced around the room a little before returning her gaze to him. “It seems I missed most of the guests by several days. The disadvantage of taking my time to arrive.”
“There is that,” he agreed. “Though you’re probably better not having been here earlier. It would have been somewhat crowded.”
“I agree. Sometimes too many people can be difficult to be around. I admit I’m rather glad I arrived late.”
Either she was the most self-centered person in all of England or she forgot she hadn’t traveled alone. It’s possible he was being a bit overdramatic with his assessment. She might not be as selfish as he was assuming. Their conversation had turned tedious, and he wanted to be done with it. He was already trying to discern a way to excuse himself from dinner. While everyone was eating he could search the manor for Lia. “
That is a good point. Did you travel alone?”
Lucas wanted to be more forthright and ask if Lia had come with her, but he didn’t want Lady Anne to realize he was acquainted with her. He was also tired of their conversation and wanted it to end. The sooner he got an answer from her the quicker he could leave the drawing room.
“No,” Lady Anne answered. “It wouldn’t be prudent for a lady to travel alone. My companion travels with me everywhere. She’s tired from the trip and is staying in her room. Why do you ask?”
And that was why he didn’t want to ask her outright. He hated meddlesome people, especially when he had no answer he felt comfortable giving. “No reason. It seemed like a more fascinating topic than the weather.”
She scrunched her eyebrows together. “Trust me, she’s not that interesting. There’s no one more dull than my companion.”
Somehow, he doubted that. If the lady traveling with her was indeed Lia, she had secrets aplenty. Lady Anne would probably be surprised to discover that bit of information. Lucas might know more about Lia than Lady Anne did, at the very least he understood her origins. Lia had run from an abusive father and had a lot of courage. “I’ll take your word for it. I think they are about to call us in for our evening meal.” He would take a detour in the opposite direction, but she didn’t need that information. He, on the other hand, would have a discussion with one of the servants. Where did they put a traveling companion? Lia wouldn’t be a servant, but in her current role she wouldn’t be considered high society.
“You may be right,” Lady Anne replied. “Maybe we’ll be table mates and we can continue our conversation.”
“Perhaps we will be.” He glanced past her. “If you’ll pardon me, I have something to discuss with Lord Seabrook before we go in.” He bowed slightly. “Until later…” With that, he left her alone. He had someone else he desperately needed to find, and he couldn’t stand too long on propriety for Lady Anne’s sake.
* * *
Everyone should be in the dining room enjoying their meal. At least Natalia hoped so. She didn’t want to get caught delivering Lady Anne’s letter to her paramour. He might not be her lover, but she certainly wanted him to be. There had to be a reason she thought he’d be favorable to the idea. Yes, Lady Anne wanted to marry him, but she also desired him for more than that.
In some ways, Natalia could empathize with Lady Anne. There was one man she had always loved and would have been happy to spend the rest of her life with. She wouldn’t subject Lucas to the tragedy her life continued to be. She wouldn’t even be in England if she didn’t need to find her cousin. Lucas being at Weston Manor made things inherently more difficult. None of that mattered at the moment. She had a task to see to, and she would complete it. Then she could remain in her chambers until morning. After she saw to whatever Lady Anne required, she’d seek out the Marquess and Marchioness. One of them would have the answers she needed.
Natalia opened the door to her chambers and glanced down the hallway. There was no one around. She breathed a sigh of relief and tiptoed in the direction of Lady Anne’s gentleman’s room. It didn’t take long for her to find the correct chambers. She slipped inside, trying to remain as quiet as possible. Natalia didn’t want to get caught in a room she didn’t belong in. She placed the letter where Lady Anne had directed her and left as quickly as possible, then headed to her own room.
Once she arrived, she went inside her room and was surprised to find it dark. There had been a candle lit when she’d left. She hadn’t expected to be gone long and thought it would be safe to leave the flame burning. Something must have blown it out. Drat. She needed to put on her nightclothes or she’d skip relighting it altogether. The tinderbox had been left on the side table. She would have to locate it and manage to light the candle again.
Her foot connected with something hard. “Ouch.”
“Hello, darling,” a male said. “I was beginning to think you weren’t coming back, and that would have been…” He paused a moment. “Unfortunate.” The last word held a hint of disapproval.
Natalia had a feeling she knew who was in the room with her, but with the darkness she couldn’t be certain. Who was she trying to fool? There wasn’t a doubt in her mind who spoke to her. It wasn’t likely she’d ever forget the sound of his voice. That didn’t mean she was ready to admit to it aloud. “Who’s there?”
“Trying to play innocent, are you?” He chuckled softly. “All right, we’ll see what direction this game of yours takes us. But first…” He lit a candle. “I’d like to see you while we speak.”
“Then you shouldn’t have snuffled the candle to begin with.” Natalia couldn’t hold back her irritation. A part of her was ecstatic to have him near, but the other side of her was terrified. She didn’t think he’d hurt her. Lucas was a good man and had saved her when she’d needed someone noble in her life. If she had been a different person, or if her father hadn’t been evil, they could have had a future together. The kindest thing she could have done for him was walk away. That didn’t mean he didn’t have the right to be angry with her. The problem was—he didn’t sound angry at all. He was eerily calm and the tone of his voice held a hint of sarcasm in it. That relaxed attitude though… It terrified her far more than his anger ever could. What was he thinking?
“I thought it would add to the ambiance.” Lucas lounged in the chair near the table. He was as handsome as she remembered, and she ached to throw her arms around him and beg forgiveness. As much as she wanted to though, she wouldn’t. She didn’t regret the decision she’d made. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “Are you going to explain?”
He wouldn’t understand if she tried. “What?” Natalia lifted a brow. “You’ll have to elucidate. I’m uncertain what you wish me to say.” Over the years, she’d checked on him from time to time, or rather she had hired someone to look in on him. She might not have been able to be with him, but she still cared and had wanted to do her part to make certain he found some form of happiness.
“Don’t you?” Sarcasm was laced through Lucas’s voice as he shook his head. Disbelief seemed to cloud his eyes, and his gaze hardened. “I’m not certain why I would bother to listen to anything you have to say anyway. You made your wishes clear when you ran away from me nine years ago.”
She sighed. His anger reverberated through his voice. She’d hoped to avoid this confrontation, but he wanted an explanation. “My wishes have never been honored. What I want hasn’t mattered because if it did, my life would not have taken the direction it has.”
“You’re not even going to say you’re sorry, are you?” He paced the room and stopped at the window. He stared out at some unimaginable thing. She had done something similar the first time she’d met him. “I loved you. Did that mean nothing to you?”
Her heart shattered at his words. She’d loved him—still loved him. Natalia had never wanted to hurt him. It had been necessary for her to leave. To protect him, and yes, herself. There had been no decision to make. She wanted to erase that pain. Sadly, there was no remedy for the agony she’d caused him. She couldn’t tell him any of that though. It was better if he hated her. “I think you should leave.”
He left the window and came to stand in front of her. There wasn’t much space between them, and his heat enveloped her. It took every ounce of her control to stay in place and not let him intimidate her. “We’re not done.” His gaze met hers. “There’s too much left unsaid.”
“There’s nothing left between us. Move on and find someone else to bother.” Her lungs burned as she forced air into them, and she was having trouble keeping her heart from beating out of her chest. “I never loved you.”
He jerked at her words. They had to be said so he would let it go. Lucas deserved more than she could ever offer him. “You’re wrong. I know you are, but I’ll let you believe that for now.” He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. Fire spread through her as her entire body came alive. The kiss ended before it even stared. It was a
simple touch, and it sparked desire in her faster than anything ever could. “You remember it too. Dream of me tonight.” With those words, he left her alone.
If she managed to sleep he would indeed haunt her dreams. He always did, but now she’d have something to fuel them that hadn’t been there in years. She lifted her fingers to her lips and rubbed them across where his lips had touched. He’d kissed her. How was she supposed to sleep after that?
Chapter 5
Sun streamed through the window, nearly blinding Natalia. She lifted her arm to cover her eyes. The idea of waking up and starting her day didn’t appeal to her at all. She’d barely gotten any sleep thanks to Lucas’s visit to her chambers. Lady Anne was going to be difficult. Natalia should dress and go see if she needed her assistance; however, she had no ambition to do anything, and dealing with Lady Anne would not be at the top of her list even if she did. There were two people she wanted to see though. So perhaps she would roll out of bed and search for them. Lady Anne could go to the devil. Hell might even welcome her presence. Natalia certainly didn’t.
She pulled on her gown and then ran a brush through her hair. Once all the tangles were removed she quickly pulled it up into a simple chignon. There was no time to waste. She had to find Lord and Lady Seabrook. After she finished dressing and preparing for the day, Natalia left her chambers to search for them. Maybe she’d be lucky enough to find them at the morning meal. Though truthfully, she’d prefer to speak with them alone.