The Butterfly Room

by Lucinda Riley

  ‘Really? Is the “someone” a man?’ A glimmer of a smile played on Nick’s lips as he watched his mother blush.

  ‘Yes, he’s called Freddie, and he’s the dearest person I know.’

  ‘It sounds serious, Mum.’

  ‘Maybe it is,’ Posy agreed. ‘I met him when I was much younger, and then again recently when he moved to Southwold.’

  ‘Does he make you happy?’

  ‘Yes,’ Posy nodded, ‘he does.’

  ‘Then I’m thrilled for you, I really am. You’ve been by yourself for far too long.’

  ‘And so have you.’ Posy kissed him warmly. ‘Bye, Nick, and please telephone me once you’ve seen Sam.’

  ‘I will. Bye, Mum.’

  Three hours later, on his way back to London, Nick called his mother as she’d asked. The call was picked up on the second ring. ‘Hi, Mum, are you okay?’

  ‘Yes, and how are you?’

  Nick could hear the anxiety in her voice.

  ‘I’m fine, and so is Sam. We had a chat and he’s agreed to go into rehab. We looked up a clinic, gave them a call and I’m going to drive back up, collect him and take him in tomorrow.’

  ‘Oh, that is good news! Was he . . . I mean, how did he take it?’

  ‘I think that after a few days alone in that dreadful house he’s been renting, with no money to buy booze, he’s come to his senses,’ Nick replied diplomatically, wanting to spare his mother the initial aggression Sam had shown him and what it had taken to convince him to agree.

  ‘What about the cost? I did take a look at a clinic on the internet and they are terribly expensive.’

  ‘Don’t worry about that, Mum. I’m paying.’

  ‘Thank you, darling boy. I’ve been so terribly worried about him. Now, more importantly, how is Evie?’

  ‘Very weak, I’m afraid. She’s on lots of medication so she slept most of the time I was there. I did tell her you sent her love and if it’s okay with you, I’ll definitely bring Clemmie up to Admiral House next week. I think we need to be nearby. Evie also said she wanted to meet Tammy, so she might come with us too.’

  ‘The more the merrier, if you’ll forgive the expression, darling boy. Oh, I can hardly bear it for all of you.’

  ‘No. Anyway, I’ll let you know when we’ll be arriving as soon as I can.’

  ‘Okay. Drive carefully, Nick, and thank you for everything.’

  ‘I will. You take care of yourself too, Mum. Bye.’

  Nick allowed himself a small smile as he switched off the call. He’d probably be a pensioner and his mother would still tell him to drive carefully. He felt awful for telling her about Sam – he’d known how upset she would be, but at least now she understood why there had been a lack of closeness between the two of them.

  As he approached Chelsea, Nick turned his thoughts back to Tammy and Clemmie. Tammy had texted him just as he was leaving the hospital to say that she was taking Clemmie back to her house and they were getting takeaway pizza, which boded well, he thought.

  ‘Hi, darling,’ he said as Clemmie answered the door to Tammy’s house.

  ‘Hi, Daddy,’ she replied, and he saw her eyes were sparkling. ‘We’re just waiting for the pizza to arrive. We ordered you one too.’

  ‘Thanks,’ he said as he walked inside and saw Tammy getting out some plates in the kitchen. ‘Have you had a good day?’

  ‘Very,’ Clemmie said, sticking out her hands to show him her nails. ‘Tammy painted them. What do you think?’

  Nick looked down at the vivid turquoise colour and nodded. ‘Lovely,’ he agreed.

  ‘Isn’t this house the nicest house you’ve ever seen, Daddy?’ said Clemmie. ‘It’s like a doll’s house but for grown-ups. Can we live here instead of Battersea?’

  ‘I think it’s a bit small for the three of us, but yes, it is lovely. Hi, Tammy.’ Nick kissed her chastely on the cheek. ‘How are you?’

  ‘I’m fine,’ Tammy smiled. ‘We had a lovely day, didn’t we, Clemmie?’

  ‘Yes. We were going to watch Tammy’s old Barbie videos while we ate the pizza, but I s’pose you won’t want to watch them, will you?’

  ‘I don’t mind, Clemmie, whatever you’d like.’

  ‘Don’t worry, cos Tammy says I can come for a sleepover one night. How’s Mummy?’

  ‘She’s okay, she sent her love,’ he added as Tammy indicated the glass of wine she was pouring for herself and he nodded. ‘I saw Posy, your grandmother, today. She was wondering if we wanted to go and stay with her for a while. Then we’d be nearer to Mummy.’

  ‘Can Tammy come too?’

  ‘Of course she can. If she can spare the time away from the boutique.’

  ‘I’m sure I could leave Meena in charge for a few days,’ said Tammy, handing Nick a glass of wine.

  The doorbell rang and Clemmie went to collect the pizzas.

  ‘How was it today?’ Nick whispered to Tammy.

  Tammy shook her head. ‘Your daughter is truly incredible, Nick. I love her already.’

  Her words brought involuntary tears to Nick’s eyes and he swallowed them back hard. ‘Do you?’

  Tammy reached for his hand. ‘Yes, I really do.’

  Chapter 38

  ‘So, Amy, Nick took Sam in to the clinic yesterday. How do you feel about that?’ Posy asked her as they sat drinking a cup of tea in the Hophouse.

  ‘Relieved, to be honest, Posy. At least I know he won’t be paying me a visit when I go back to work tomorrow. I was scared he might.’

  ‘I also wanted to tell you that I saw Nick at the weekend. He told me that Sam bullied him badly when they were both younger. It’s important that you know that it isn’t just you, that Sam has been violent with others before. You can imagine how mortified I am that I never saw what was happening right under my nose – to you or to him.’

  ‘I promise you, Posy, Sam was always very good at making sure no one would notice,’ Amy sighed.

  ‘Are you going to see a solicitor about divorcing him?’

  ‘I will eventually, but maybe I’ll leave it until after he’s finished his treatment. It won’t be a messy divorce anyway. We have nothing to argue over, apart from the children.’

  ‘Well, you’re going to have to handle that very carefully indeed when the time comes, Amy. Unless there are some drastic changes, it wouldn’t it be safe to leave Sam alone with them.’

  ‘I know, but I am hoping he’ll be a changed man when he comes out. Do you know how long he’s going in for, by the way?’

  ‘Nick said six weeks at minimum, and then the doctors will assess him to see how he’s doing. Now then, I must be off – I have Nick arriving with Tammy and Clemmie in a couple of hours’ time.’

  ‘Clemmie? You mean Evie’s daughter?’

  ‘I do indeed, yes. And Nick’s child, as it happens. It seems Sara and Jake have a new cousin.’

  Amy stared at Posy, her eyes wide. ‘Clemmie is Nick’s daughter?!’

  ‘Yes. Sadly, Evie is very ill. She contacted Nick out of the blue a few weeks back to tell him.’

  ‘So that’s why Tammy and I saw his car sitting outside her house. Tammy was convinced they were having an affair. She was in a terrible state when she left. But if she’s coming today, they’ve obviously sorted things out.’

  ‘They have, yes, and I’m very happy for all of them, although they’re staying with me to be nearer the hospital. Evie doesn’t have much time left. Now, I really must go. Perhaps you and the children would like to come round for supper in the next few days?’

  ‘That would be lovely, Posy, and thank you for being so amazing.’

  ‘Nonsense, if I had been amazing, none of this mess with Sam would have happened. Anyway, I must run now.’

  Posy left the Hophouse and was walking across the courtyard when Freddie’s front door opened.

  ‘Posy, my dear, have you time for a cup of tea?’

  ‘I’m sorry, Freddie, but I haven’t, no.’

  ‘A hug, then?’
/>   ‘I always have time for one of those,’ she said as Freddie drew her to him and she breathed out fully for the first time that day.

  ‘I know your schedule is busy, but do you think it might be possible to book an appointment for lunch or supper with me some time this week?’

  ‘Of course it would, Freddie, you know I’d love to see you. It’s obviously busy, what with Nick bringing Clemmie and Tammy to stay, but you must come round to meet them all, too.’

  ‘Yes, I’d like that. Please, darling girl, don’t overdo it, will you?’

  ‘I’ll do my best, Freddie, I promise.’

  ‘Good,’ he said as Posy extracted herself from his embrace. ‘Do try and remember that you’re well past the age of retirement and have every right to take it easy.’

  ‘I will,’ she said as she kissed him on the cheek. ‘Bye, Freddie, speak soon.’

  As Posy drove back to Admiral House, just for a few seconds, she allowed everything else to fade into the background as she focused on Freddie and the promise of happiness that he’d brought to her life. She only prayed that soon she’d have the time to enjoy it. Just now, all her thoughts were with Evie and her daughter.

  Arriving home, she made up beds for her guests, then baked a cake for Clemmie and prepared a fish pie for supper. As dusk descended, Posy took herself out for a brisk walk around the garden to calm her mind and get some air. She hovered by the Folly, looking up at the turreted room at the top, its windows partially covered by ivy.

  Walking thoughtfully back to the house, Posy searched out her mobile from her handbag and scrolled through the numbers. Hesitating for a few seconds, she took a deep breath, then dialled.

  ‘Hello, Posy,’ the deep, melodic voice answered after a couple of rings. ‘To what do I owe this honour? Is everything all right?’

  ‘“Everything” is as complicated as always, Sebastian,’ Posy admitted, ‘but I’m surviving. How are you?’

  ‘Oh, the same really. Using every trick in the book – including a lot of Christmas drinks parties I don’t particularly want to go to – as an excuse for not sitting down at my desk and finishing the book, but I’m okay, thanks, yes.’

  ‘Sebastian, I was rather wondering whether you could help me with something.’

  ‘Anything, Posy, you know that.’

  ‘Freddie told me that he spoke to you about my . . . father.’

  ‘He did, yes. And subsequently, he’s obviously told you too.’

  ‘Yes, he has. It was a terrible shock, as you can imagine, but I’m getting over it now. One has to, doesn’t one?’

  ‘Unfortunately one does. And if anyone can do that, it’s you, Posy. You’re the strongest person I know. That’s what I told Freddie when he asked my opinion on whether he should tell you. He was desperately worried about upsetting you. He adores you, Posy, truly.’

  ‘And I adore him. All is well between us now.’

  ‘That makes me very happy,’ Sebastian responded. ‘After all these years, you both deserve it.’

  ‘Thank you, dear Sebastian. One way and another, life has certainly been challenging recently. And as far as the business with my father is concerned, I’ve been trying to think of a way to put what happened – and him – to rest.’

  ‘You mean, you want closure, as our American friends would put it.’

  ‘Quite. And I’ve thought of a possible way to find it.’

  ‘Good. So tell me how I can help.’

  Posy did so.

  ‘I see,’ said Sebastian after a pause. ‘Well, I can certainly put in a call to my contact at the Home Office. He helped me with research for The Shadow Fields and should be able to point me in the right direction. I’ve no idea if it’s standard practice or not.’

  ‘Perhaps at least they could tell you where he is, Sebastian. Which would be something.’

  ‘Of course. I’ll let you know if I get any joy, and you can take it from there.’

  ‘Thank you, Sebastian dear, I really appreciate it. Now, I must run over to the Aga before my fish pie burns.’

  ‘I can smell it from here. Your cooking has ruined me, Posy. Takeaways haven’t tasted the same since. I’ll be in touch when I know more – bye now.’

  Posy clicked off her mobile and went to see to the fish pie.

  ‘Nick, darling.’ Posy kissed her son warmly as he walked through the kitchen door.

  ‘Hello, Mum. Something smells good, as always,’ he smiled, then turned to Clemmie, who was holding his hand tightly. ‘Your granny makes the best chocolate sponge cake in the universe.’

  ‘Hello, Clemmie,’ Posy said as she looked at the little girl’s pale face, her features so like her mother’s. ‘Can I give you a hug?’

  ‘Yes, Posy . . . I mean, Granny,’ she blushed.

  ‘I know, it is confusing,’ Posy said as she took the child into her arms and held her close. ‘But fun to be related, isn’t it?’

  ‘I think so, yes,’ Clemmie whispered shyly.

  ‘Why don’t you take off your coat and have a slab of that chocolate cake Daddy was talking about? You must be starving after your journey.’

  ‘Hello, Posy,’ said Tammy, bringing up the rear.

  ‘Darling girl, how lovely to see you again. I’ll put the kettle on.’ Posy walked over to fetch the kettle from the Aga and filled it. ‘Good journey?’

  ‘Not bad – at least we missed the rush hour,’ said Nick, his eyes glued to Clemmie as he took the knife to cut her a slab of cake.

  ‘When you’ve eaten that, Clemmie, I’ll have to show you your room. It’s where your daddy used to sleep when he was younger,’ said Posy.

  ‘This house is so big, Granny.’ Clemmie’s eyes wandered round the kitchen. ‘It’s like a castle.’

  ‘It is big, yes, and needs lots of people in it to fill it up,’ Posy smiled as the kettle boiled.

  ‘You were very lucky to live here as a child, Daddy,’ Clemmie commented as she broke the cake into dainty pieces and popped some in her mouth.

  ‘I was, wasn’t I?’

  ‘Now, shall we have tea in the morning room?’ Posy suggested. ‘I’ve lit a fire.’

  Half an hour later, Tammy had taken Clemmie upstairs so that both of them could unpack and Posy sat with her son in front of the fire.

  ‘Any news from the hospital?’

  ‘The same, I’m afraid. I’m taking Tammy in tomorrow; Evie wants to see her. Can you look after Clemmie while I’m gone?’

  ‘Of course I can. She can come to the gallery with me for a few hours. How is she?’

  ‘She knows her mum’s still in the hospital – Evie didn’t want to see her until she was out, but I think it’s too late for that,’ Nick sighed. ‘I just wish it wasn’t Christmas – it all seems a lot worse when everyone else is full of festive cheer.’

  ‘Well, we’ll do our best to make Clemmie welcome here. The Christmas tree arrives tomorrow afternoon, so she can help me decorate that.’

  ‘And maybe you could go and visit Evie too, depending on how she is.’

  ‘Of course, darling. Now, I’d better put some vegetables on to go with that fish pie.’

  After supper, Nick took Clemmie up to get her ready for bed, and Tammy and Posy stood side by side doing the washing up.

  ‘Amy told me that you found out Nick was visiting Evie,’ Posy said carefully.

  ‘I did, yes.’

  ‘Well, it’s all credit to you that you’re prepared to support him and Clemmie.’

  ‘I love him, Posy,’ Tammy stated simply. ‘Admittedly, I did have my doubts about being a mother figure to Clemmie – before last week, I wasn’t sure I was maternal at all, and I was worried how Clemmie would be with me. But she was so amazing, Posy. It was as if she understood how nervous I was, and she couldn’t have made it easier for me to fall in love with her. She’s just adorable, and it scares me how protective I already feel about her.’

  ‘Then that’s what you must tell Evie when you see her tomorrow, Tammy.’

  �
�God, I’m dreading it, Posy,’ Tammy sighed. ‘Do you really think she’d want to hear that? She won’t feel like I’m taking her child away from her, or anything?’

  ‘I think it’s exactly what she wants and needs to hear, Tammy; all that matters is that her little girl is loved and protected. At least, I know that’s what I would feel if I were her.’

  ‘I don’t think I’m very good in those kinds of situations,’ Tammy confessed. ‘I’ll probably just break down and cry all over the place.’

  ‘You didn’t think you’d be any good as a mum, Tammy, but it’s obvious that you will be. All this is a lot to take on board and you can only take it one day at a time. For my part, I’m thrilled you’ll be there for my son and granddaughter, and I’m sure Evie – once she meets you – will be too.’

  ‘Thanks, Posy, I really appreciate your support. Now then,’ Tammy said, drying her hands on a tea towel, ‘I’d better go and say goodnight to Clemmie.’

  Tammy felt nauseous as Nick led her down the ward towards Evie’s room. She’d never been good in hospitals – was terrified of them, with all the machines that bleeped and buzzed constantly, monitoring the life they were attached to ebbing and flowing.

  ‘She’s just in there.’ Nick indicated the door.

  ‘Oh my God.’ Tammy held on to him fast. ‘I’m not sure I can do this, Nick, I . . .’

  ‘You’re going to be fine, sweetheart, I promise. She’s asleep most of the time now and I’ll be with you, don’t worry. Okay?’ He tipped her chin up to look at him.

  ‘Okay, sorry.’

  Nick pushed the door open and they walked into the room. Tammy gazed at the tiny, pale figure lying in the bed. Evie looked dwarfed by the machinery surrounding her – and hardly older than her daughter.

  ‘Sit down there,’ Nick whispered to her as he pointed to a chair.

  Tammy sat next to Nick, her eyes focused on the machine that showed Evie’s steady heartbeat. It was just unthinkable that a woman who was the same age as her might be disappearing from the earth within days. Tammy swallowed hard. She had no right to cry, after all, because she was looking forward to the rest of her life with the man she loved and Evie’s beloved daughter.