Lawful Heart

by Amity Lassiter

  “Norah, everything’s going to be okay.”

  She shook her head, her vision blurred by tears as she pulled on her pants.

  “I’ve got to get back to Nan’s.”

  Banks was sitting up now, watching her as she moved around the room briskly, gathering her things. Ten minutes ago, she’d thought she might stay the night, sneak back before Nan realized she was gone. Now she couldn’t imagine. She’d escalated to high alert without even thinking about it, and she could only think about getting away from the man who had threatened what little safety she felt like she had.

  He followed her out of the bedroom, fumbling into a pair of pajama pants as she went.

  “You don’t have to go,” Banks said, but made no move to block her exit. “Stay here, I’ll take care of you.”

  Unable to meet his gaze, she shook her head, her heart thundering in her ears, and let herself out, her panic escalating.

  She didn’t look back, and once she got into the driver’s seat of Nan’s car, she took a minute to try to compose herself. To calm her racing heart, slow her breathing, and staunch the tears that had run freely since she’d turned her back to Banks. In her peripheral vision, she could see him standing in his open door while she put the car in drive and pulled out.

  —TWENTY-SEVEN—

  “I was just trying to do the right thing,” Banks said, reining Bud around a fallen log. Beside him, Dane Baylor, his friend since childhood, shook his head.

  “I’m not saying either of you is wrong, but sometimes the right thing isn’t actually the right thing,” Dane said, clearly choosing his words carefully.

  Banks had barely slept, and since it was the weekend, he had a good long stretch ahead to think about what an idiot he was, before waiting with bated breath to see if Norah actually came to the office on Monday or high tailed it out of Three Rivers. He wouldn’t blame her for running scared.

  He’d called Dane early this morning. They’d done a lot of riding in the woods, talking about girls growing up. Now father to half a baseball team and busy horse trainer, Dane hadn’t joined Banks on a ride like this in some time. Banks suspected there had been a tinge of desperation in his voice decades of friendship wouldn’t let Dane ignore. So Banks had trailered Bud over, apologized profusely to Dane’s wife, Ren, while she shoved a thermos of coffee and a Tupperware container of muffins into his hands, and they’d ridden out onto the Baylor acreage.

  The ranch had changed a lot since they were teenagers and Dane’s parents, Kane and Ella Baylor, had operated it. They still bred limousin cattle, and ran a training operation, but these days, the three Baylor brothers, in addition to Nate, ran an up and coming rodeo school and they’d turned one of the close paddocks into a bunkhouse and arena with chutes and seating. Still, once they rode out past the big gate and started over the hill, it was all the same as it has been when they’d been boys. Open sky, grazing herds, and a heavy peace that settled over you like a big blanket. Banks was grateful the space had always been available to him.

  It hadn’t taken long for Dane to ask what Banks was chewing on, but it had taken nearly the whole ride out to the farthest fence line and then halfway back again for Banks to tell the whole story. Right through from the beginning—Dane and his family knew what they knew about Norah from Nan telling them about the pretty young office manager Banks had hired, but that was about it. From who she was to why she was there, right down to the pregnancy and their experience at the hospital, he’d laid it all out. It felt good, not to just hold it in his head anymore. To not feel silly about the shocking way she made his world spin.

  “I guess you’re right about that one. I didn’t know she was even still in contact with him, never mind that he didn’t know she was still here in Three Rivers. But she works in the sheriff’s office. She’s a five minute drive from my place, living with my Nan. I can’t imagine a safer place to be.”

  “You can’t imagine a safer place to be,” Dane supplied. “She still knows him and what he’s capable of way better than she knows you and what you’re capable of. Remember how Ren reacted when her mother was in town.”

  “Logic,” Banks said with a chuckle. He remembered all too well when Ren’s abusive mother had tracked her and Kerri down in Three Rivers. He’d been sheriff when she swiped Kerri and Gage, and the woman had been such a treat. It was the most action the town had had in years. It was easy to look at that situation and understand what Dane was saying now. This one, he was clearly too close to.

  “Careful now, or they’ll elect me for sheriff.”

  “I might elect you myself.”

  Dane laughed and shook his head. “You think I’ve got time to be sheriff with my posse?”

  “I barely have time for it. And we’re not even in a busy precinct.” Banks said, rubbing the back of his neck.

  “You do have plenty on your plate. Who would have thought when we were 16 years old doing this trek that we’d eventually be grown men with jobs and responsibilities?”

  “Not me.”

  “Not me, either.”

  “I mean, being busy all the time isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, either, but this life is one hell of an adventure. Fatherhood is better than it’s made out to be. You ought to try it.”

  Banks gave his friend some side eye.

  “You know that was never in the plans.” He wasn’t about to admit it was basically all he’d thought about since Norah had revealed her pregnancy and they’d started to get close. But that was another man’s child. A man she was afraid of, and didn’t trust him to protect her from.

  “Plans change,” Dane said, shifting in the saddle as they started the descent toward the cluster of buildings that made up the homestead of the ranch. “And sometimes those changed plans lead to the kind of happiness you might not have imagined.”

  “Okay, knock it off with the good advice.”

  “You know you’d be saying the exact same thing if the boots were on the other feet.”

  “You’re not wrong about that.”

  *

  Back at the Baylor ranch, Banks popped Bud into a stall in the barn when Dane insisted he come inside. He knew better than to refuse when Ren was offering to feed him. Inside the big house, the kitchen was abuzz. A big platter of chicken sat in the middle of the table with a huge bowl of garden salad on one side and pasta salad on the other. Banks had joined enough dinners around the big old farmhouse table as a kid that it was pure nostalgia to slide onto the bench next to Noah and across from Finn.

  Through the week, each brother and their family did dinners in their own personal abodes, but weekends were busy, especially with Dane’s oldest charge, Gage, getting old enough for the baseball team and 4H clubs and everyone came together to get stuff done. At any time they might also have a guest instructor for the rodeo school or a spare hand from the next town over. If Banks thought Nan’s place was raucous during a Sunday dinner, the Baylor house was ten times that.

  At the counter, Ren was moving cookies from a cooling tray into a big Tupperware container, sparing a few for a serving plate. Kerri flitted through the kitchen, doing a fancy spin in between Ren, and Noah’s wife, Emma, to nab a cookie from the plate.

  “Hey, those are for softball,” Ren protested.

  “Don’t worry about it,” Kerri said, her mouth full of cookie. She wouldn’t stay for the meal—she never did. With her handful of odd jobs and her school work, she never stayed in one place for long, Banks knew. He was lucky she always showed up when he needed her.

  “We still on for tonight, Ker?” he asked, just before she ducked out the door.

  “Yup,” she said, pulling out her phone and swiping her finger across the screen. “Right in my calendar. Banks; Crash and feed. You in the dunking booth again this year?”

  “Every year,” he said with a laugh. And then as quickly as she’d appeared, she disappeared out the door to who knew where.

  Lily Baylor took a seat across from Banks. She was dressed in a chambray butto
n down over a white tank, her dark hair piled messily atop her head. He might have been imagining it but it looked like she had a smudge of dirt on her cheek. He shook his head with a bit of a chuckle. She was a bit of a free spirit but she was a great addition to the Baylor family and a lifesaver for his friend, Finn, who had lost his first wife to cancer years before he met Lily.

  She caught him looking and swiped at her face, smiling ruefully.

  “We’re doing photos for the rodeo school website today,” she said.

  “I didn’t say a thing.”

  “But you were thinking it,” she accused.

  “I don’t pretend to understand what you do, but you do a damn good job at it, so carry on.”

  She was a phenomenal photographer, and she traveled all over the countryside working on livestock advertising print. She’d really thrown herself into showing a mirror to the people of Three Rivers since she’d come here, too. She was an ‘outsider’ but she might have loved them just as much as Banks himself did. She was always snapping photos of great, important moments, and sharing them with the people of the town. Later this summer, her gala at Pine Grove would be the major event in town.

  “Don’t mind if I do,” she replied.

  “How’re those pictures for the retirement home coming, anyway?”

  She smiled so wide it near split her face.

  “Great. I really loved that series. I hope everyone comes. I think it’s important.”

  “I think it’s important, too,” he agreed. “I’ll make sure to spread the word.”

  “And make sure Norah comes?” Lily started. “Nan told me you have her working up at the office.”

  “You know Norah?”

  Lily nodded. “I met her when she was visiting her Aunt Gloria a few weeks ago when she first arrived. Got a couple of nice shots. She seems sweet, Banks. You should hang onto that.”

  Sitting amongst his friends and their families, he’d never been more aware of that.

  —TWENTY-EIGHT—

  Norah’s heart did a backflip when she heard a knock at the door of her apartment. She’d been filling in details on a portrait drawing of Crash because it was a good distraction. Or maybe not, since Crash made her think of Banks and he made her think of what she’d given up when she’d walked out of his house the night before. She dropped her pencil and pushed away from the island that divided the kitchen and living room areas.

  “Just a minute!”

  A little jolt of disappointment moved through her when she pulled open the door to reveal Layla and Mason on the other side of the door. The toddler was smiling big.

  “Hi Nor,” he said.

  “Hi Mason,” she said, returning his big smile. Even if she didn’t feel it all the way to her toes, his happiness made her happy. He was a good kid and he enjoyed being around him.

  “Mason wanted to stop by and see if you’d like to come with us to the Spring Fling this afternoon.”

  Norah had seen flyers up around town—Banks had filled her in one afternoon in the office. It was the start of the summer season for the town—one big block party on the main drag. Dunking booths, barbeque, a big dance. He’d seemed pretty excited about it, and based on the way Mason was bouncing on his toes, Banks wasn’t the only one.

  “Of course, that sounds like fun.” Norah said.

  “Nan is coming, too. She said you could catch a ride with her and we’ll all meet up there and go in together.”

  “Sounds like a plan to me. When are you leaving?”

  “Whenever you’re ready.”

  “I’ll just change and be right up.”

  Layla and Mason headed back up to Nan’s while Norah changed out of the pajama pants she’d been lounging in, and into a cute empire waisted sundress she’d bought from the consignment store in the strip mall. It wasn’t technically maternity wear but the shape allowed room for her growing bump and when she put it on, she liked the way it hugged over her curves and fell away from her hips. She’d never been much for dresses but she liked the aesthetic on Layla and it gave lots of room for her changing body.

  She was still angry at Banks but a small part of her hoped she’d see him. Hoped he’d be sorry when he saw how good she looked. Hoped he’d talk to her and they could make things right.

  Norah gave herself one last glance in the mirror before she grabbed the jean jacket she’d bought at the same time, headed out and met the quartet. She was a bit surprised Banks wasn’t there, since it seemed like a family event. She climbed in with Nan and the two cars made the short drive into town, parking in the back lot of the dance hall to walk in to the festivities.

  They’d barricaded each end of the main drag that went past Hinkley’s and Turners and Dr. Fields’ office, and what had to have been the entire population of Three Rivers and then some, were milling about on the pavement. A couple of bouncy castles and a petting zoo and pony rides were set up in Dannys’ parking lot. Several booths and crafts sellers huddled in a line along the sidewalk under fold out canopies. Fair in the middle of the street, a dance floor had been built, and strings of big bulb lights had been criss-crossed between four posts at each corner. It didn’t look like much right now but Norah could have bet money on how magical it was going to look when the sun went down.

  Striding into the melee as though she was a part of the Montgomery family felt more right than she had expected. Mason rode on Nate’s shoulders as they started into the party, checking out the booths and vendors.

  “Uncle Bang!” Mason finally shouted above the din of the gathering.

  Norah turned, expecting to find Banks cutting through the crowd toward them but instead saw him perched on the seat of the dunking booth, with his thumbs stuck in his ears and his fingers wiggling, taunting Mason from across the sidewalk. She couldn’t help but smile—the special relationship she’d seen between the child and his uncle was on full display.

  “Balls!” Mason shouted and Nate swung him down off of his shoulders, shifting him onto his hip with one arm as they worked their way toward where an older woman manned a table with a big bucket of softballs and a cash box. Norah, Nan, and Layla followed along.

  “Good afternoon, Ella,” Nate greeted the woman. “How much is it?”

  “Well hello, Nate. Two dollars per throw or six for ten dollars,” she replied. “It’s for Lone Oak Ranch this year, they’re hoping to expand their veteran rehabilitation efforts again.”

  “Worthy cause,” he said, pulling out his wallet. “We’ll do the six.”

  Ella took his money and handed the balls over. Nate doled them out—one each for each of the adults, and two for Mason.

  “Betcha can’t hit me, Mase,” Banks taunted from inside the cage.

  Nate got close with the toddler, giving him the opportunity to try a throw on his own. Mason’s aim was surprisingly close, but missed the mark. They stepped back.

  “Nan’s turn,” Nate said, and Nan stepped up to the line, lobbing a soft underhanded throw that missed the target by a mile.

  “You’re my best girl, Nan,” Banks hooted. It was a sort of fun-loving, teasing side to Banks that Norah had only seen glimpses of. It was hard to stay mad at him considering the way he was hamming it up.

  “Layla, Norah?” Nate directed. Layla gestured to the line, implying Norah should go first, but Norah shook her head.

  “Go ahead, I can wait,” Norah said.

  Layla’s throw was close, and hit the wire hard, but didn’t tip the target. Banks launched into a litany of teasing and smack talk, giving Layla a hard time.

  In the midst of it, Norah stepped up, winding up like a Major League pitcher, even though she had no idea what she was doing, and horrible aim. A buzzer blared when her ball actually hit the target, wringing a surprised laugh out of her as Banks’ trash talk was silenced and he dropped into the tank. Mason shrieked with delight.

  Her chest puffed with pride, Norah felt about ten feet tall when Nate gave her a high five, Layla and Nan both clapping her on the shoulder,
everyone laughing. Banks came up sputtering, laughing, and shaking his head. He pointed at her with an exaggerated scowl on his features and she shrugged innocently.

  “That was so satisfying I don’t even need my throw anymore,” Nate said, then sacrificed his throw to Mason. They gave two more tries before Nate ran him up to the target and told him to high five it, sending Banks back into the water with a big splash over the edge to make Mason shriek with laughter.

  They wandered away and started down the street, checking out some other games and vendors. Outside of an inflatable bouncy castle that Nate toed out of his boots and climbed into with Mason, they found Lily Baylor waiting for her daughter Tessa. Nan and Layla greeted her then wandered off to the ladies auxiliary table to chat with a friend of Nan’s.

  “Oh, Norah, look at you!”

  “Surprise, I’m pregnant,” Norah said with a laugh.

  “So you are! You know, I was hoping I’d run into you,” she started, rummaging in the messenger bag on her shoulder. “I’ve been lugging this around forever and a day, hoping I’d see you.”

  She pulled a 5x7 photo out of a cardboard envelope. It was swathed in a plastic sleeve, and when she handed it over to Norah, she could see the photo was of her hugging Gloria in the residence on that first full day here in Three Rivers. She couldn’t see her aunt’s face, but she could see hers, and all the emotions from that moment in time were on prominent display. There was a relief she hadn’t expected. Norah looked up at Lily, pressing her lips together to stop even more feelings from displaying themselves.

  “Thank you,” she finally managed to say past the lump in her throat. Her heart felt so open, so warm. That day felt like a million miles away, she’d come so far since then, but it was important. It was a part of the journey that needed to be acknowledged.