Lawful Heart

by Amity Lassiter

  “Um, I’m not sure. Stressed out, really, I think.”

  She thought she’d danced around the question nicely, but Gloria narrowed her eyes. Despite her suspicious countenance, Gloria didn’t press further, just nodded.

  “What about you?”

  Stressed out would have been a good way to put it for her, too. She put on a smile, but it didn’t feel sincere.

  “I’m okay.”

  “Norah,” her aunt said sternly. “There’s something else.”

  “Well, Rob showed up at Nan’s.”

  Gloria sucked in a breath and shook her head.

  “Did he hurt you? Banks must have been angry.”

  Norah cleared her throat. She could talk about Rob. That hurt less than Banks. She had no idea if he had been angry, or was angry, but she could take a wild guess that he didn’t care, because it was too much distraction, her and her messy history.

  “He didn’t hurt me. Didn’t touch me. Banks had already left for the hospital with Nate. The Baylor women and Layla basically sent him running. He didn’t think he wanted to try his luck with Layla and her baseball bat again.”

  Gloria chuckled. She’d cackled with laughter at the image Norah had painted of Layla running Rob off with her bat in the bar the first time. Her laughter lifted Norah’s heart just a little.

  “You’ve got good people on your team, Norah.”

  Norah nodded. Even without Banks, she did.

  “Yeah.”

  “Speaking of good people…did you see the pictures Lily took of us together on that first day?”

  As much pain as she felt now, Norah couldn’t deny the warmth in her heart when she thought of that first visit to Gloria. The surprise on her face, the warmth in her embrace. Even if she lost Banks, by staying here she gained so much more than she had thought she’d even deserve.

  “I did.”

  Gloria gestured to a framed photo sitting at the end of her table. It was the same snapshot Lily had given her, of Gloria holding Norah tightly. Before Jellybean was obvious. Before she’d had any amount of conversation with Banks. Before she’d been envisioning a life in Three Rivers. But it looked right. She should have known then.

  “The unveiling gala for all the photos is on Sunday. They’re going to be up in the common room for a couple of months but they are planning a big do, fancy dress and drinks and everything, like we’re movie stars. I’d love if you could come. I was on the planning committee.” Gloria nearly burst with pride talking about it and there was no way in hell Norah could say no to that big, wide smile.

  “Of course I’ll be there.”

  Norah and Gloria fell into quiet, casual conversation. There was no pressure to talk about what had happened with Banks or the future. Just chit chat with no consequence. Norah didn’t know she’d been missing this kind of casual human connection until it was happening again.

  As empty as her heart had felt the night before, when Norah left Gloria’s apartment, it felt full again, just like that. There was so much more to life than a man, and she had a home here regardless of what happened with Banks.

  —FORTY-TWO—

  A knock at the door stiffened Norah’s spine. She wasn’t expecting anyone, and it turned out she wasn’t as cool with the house above her being empty as she had thought, considering Rob now knew where she was residing. She peered over the back of the couch where she’d been resting to see if she could see who was on her porch.

  It had been a long day at the office, and she’d felt sort of aimless without Banks there, though it might have been better that way. Carter had picked her up this morning, and called in a deputy from a neighboring county for backup. He’d told her this was the first time Banks had ever taken time off of work. Learning Josiah Reicher’s little personality quirks had taken most of her time and brainpower that hadn’t been absorbed thinking about Banks and Nan and everyone else. If Carter had an update, he was being tight lipped about it, but she supposed she couldn’t blame him. She was reminded once again that she wasn’t actually a part of the family.

  The knock came again and Norah got to her feet.

  “Hello?”

  It was Nate. Nothing to worry about. She crossed the floor and pulled the door open to find Nate in her doorway with his hat in his hands. She glanced around him for Layla but he shook his head.

  “Layla sent me. She’s having some Braxton Hicks contractions but thought I should check in to make sure you’re okay.”

  “Oh, that’s sweet of her,” Norah said, stepping out of the doorway to let him in. “Come in. How’s Nan doing?”

  “She’ll be in for a few more days. Once she got up and around, she realized she was a little more bruised and battered than they all thought, so they’re going to let her rest there, since Dr. Fields knew she wouldn’t be very good at resting if she came back here.”

  Norah chuckled. Yep, typical Nan.

  Once inside, Nate’s jaw worked as he searched for words, his eyes landing on the crib she’d pushed against the wall, and then averting quickly. If she had to guess, he’d helped Banks move it in.

  “And…I don’t know what happened between you and Banks at the hospital on the weekend, but he’s been there pretty much nonstop since then and you haven’t, so I figure something happened…but I’m awful sorry if he was rude, Norah. He’s not normally like… ”

  Norah held up her hand to stop him, shaking her head.

  “Nate, you don’t have to apologize for your brother. There’s nothing to apologize about, anyway.” And even if there was, she didn’t want to hear it. It just rehashed everything in her mind, bringing the lingering hurt right to the surface. She might have made up her mind there were good things here in Three Rivers that didn’t include Banks, but that didn’t mean the ache wasn’t still there, especially when she’d been standing in the doorway of his empty office, trying to make up her mind to step in and get a file she needed. Or when she looked at the crib she’d pushed against the wall in the living room, trying to figure out exactly where in the little bachelor apartment it was going to fit. Besides, if there was an apology to be had, coming from his brother it was second rate, no matter how good a man Nate was. “I just need to take my mind off of things.”

  Nate nodded, gestured toward his truck in the yard.

  “I’m on my way over to the Baylor’s to talk about the next few rodeo school recruits. I’m sure the gals would be happy to see you, and you’re welcome to ride along. I can drop you back off on the way home.”

  She wasn’t too familiar with the women at the Baylor ranch but they’d stood behind her when it counted the most, and she was willing to do just about anything besides spend time in her own head here at the apartment, so she nodded. There were still several hours of daylight and virtually her only other option was to sit here alone with her brain that didn’t even want to draw these days. Besides, it didn’t hurt to strengthen relationships and bonds with other women with children in town. Lord knew she needed a village, and Ren, Lily, and Emma all seemed like a pretty damn good village.

  “You know what? I think I will.”

  Nate cracked a smile.

  “Great,” he said, pulling the door open and waiting for her to pass through. He helped her into the passenger side of the lifted truck the same way she’d seen him do for Layla a dozen times this summer, and then climbed in on his side.

  He was a good man, just the same as his brother. Nan had done lots of things right and the two Montgomery boys were certainly testament to that. Banks might not have been fair to her, but he was an upstanding citizen with a good moral compass, and it seemed that Nate was the same.

  “Thanks for the lift,” she said.

  “Oh, well I was going there anyways, like I said,” Nate replied.

  “No, I mean…” Norah gestured to her protruding stomach. “But you must be pretty accustomed to that by this point, between two pregnancies.”

  A tight smile crossed Nate’s lips.

  “Not quite, but I�
�m getting my share of practice now. I’m not sure if Layla told you, but I didn’t come back to Three Rivers until Mason was almost a year old. I didn’t even know Layla was pregnant. That’s all water under the bridge now, but I’m trying hard to make up for the first time around. So yes, I lift my wife into the truck every damn time.”

  While he talked, his smile got broader. Pride in fatherhood looked good on him.

  “Class act dad, I think,” Norah proclaimed.

  “It wasn’t always easy. There was some mistrust in the beginning. And I’ve messed up. But I love Layla and Mason fiercely, and this new one is that much more special because I get to witness the whole thing. When I get off track, Layla brings me back. I’m learning as I go, but that’s what matters most—trying. Nobody’s gonna be perfect at this game.”

  “And you guys didn’t have a dad around to model after either,” Norah said. The fact that the Montgomery boys had been abandoned by their parents very young was no secret. Nan had raised them like they were her own. There was never any emotion when this was mentioned—it seemed she’d done a good job making sure their feelings were acknowledged and processed as they’d grown.

  “No, and that made fatherhood that much more scary,” Nate said as he flicked on his blinker and turned in a long, wooded driveway. “I had no idea what I was doing, no idea how I wanted to be as a dad, even. I just…our granddad died before we were born and Nan never remarried so there wasn’t even ever that aspect in our lives. Sure, Caine Baylor was a great role model, but it’s not the same. Regardless, I think I’m turning out okay…” he paused, for a long stretch. “And I think Banks will do fine, too, once he gets out whatever bee is in his bonnet.”

  While that would have been great for Norah, she pressed her lips into a smile she didn’t feel in her heart in order to push past the hopefulness in her heart that Nate’s words ignited. He pulled up in front of a big old farm house that preceded two huge barns, a couple of what looked like expanded bunk houses, and several big outdoor pens—some with horses and hay, and others with sand and chutes. It was like Banks’ place, just on steroids. From the porch, Ren waved. Nate parked and jogged around the front of the truck to help Norah back out of it—it was a bit more lifted than Banks, so it made sense.

  “How’s that wife of yours doing?” she called out to Nate before they were even to the stairs.

  “I shouldn’t have left her with Mason, but she insisted. Said he’d be in bed soon enough,” he said, shaking his head. “Braxton Hicks this evening, I think. She’s a stronger man than I am. She promised me she’d call if anything happened.”

  Ren laughed, stepping out of the doorway to let them in.

  “Norah, it’s so nice to see you. Come on in, the boys are just setting up shop with the applications to select for the summer session. Lily’s up here picking photos for her gala. She’ll be happy for your help.”

  Like she was family, even though she’d done nothing too deserve it. Norah was ushered into the big house, given a cup of coffee and a plate of cookies, and found herself sitting up next to Lily in the big living room in the Baylor house, in front of a bay window. In the kitchen, the men sat around the kitchen table with a similar set up, but their selection process was much more raucous.

  She sat next to Lily and across from Ren. Emma, she was told, was out wrangling the mess of kids who lived on the ranch, doing chores with Noah. If the Montgomery property felt like a family residence, the Baylor ranch was three times that. Lily had splayed out a few dozen photos on the table in front of them. Norah recognized some of Gloria’s neighbors and a fair number of photos of herself at Gloria’s had made the spread.

  “So we treat it like a movie premiere. I try to do it every year, it’s something the residents really look forward to,” Lily said, taking a sip of her coffee, then shifting a couple of photos around. The move didn’t make sense to Norah, but she respected Lily’s artistic eye. She knew most of the things she did when it came to her artwork probably made no sense to an outsider. “Gloria was so proud when I showed her the photos I wanted to use from her series.”

  Lily gestured to the photos from Norah’s homecoming. It made her smile.

  “I know. She invited me.”

  “You definitely should come. The support really means a lot to the residents. I know some of them don’t have any family in the area anymore and feel forgotten. So any opportunity we have to bring the community to them when they can’t come to the community is great. And you’re definitely a member of our community now. I saw that pile of gifts at the baby shower.”

  Lily’s tone was teasing, comfortable. Norah didn’t know a lot about these women but she knew the brothers were tight knit and they’d all been part of the family for years now. If there was any situation in which there wouldn’t be room for Norah, it would be in this group of sisters-in-law, but they welcomed her in, just like everyone else. It was another line under the ‘stay put’ column, and there were very few in the ‘leave Three Rivers’ column already. This was the community and village she needed. She’d have nobody in Denver, or anywhere else she might choose to go for that matter.

  “I’m sure being made to feel like it,” she admitted, clasping her coffee and reaching for a second cookie. “Didn’t seem to have much choice in the matter.”

  “You know, I was from away once, too. But not for very long,” Lily said with a laugh. Ren shook her head, corroborating her story.

  “You don’t get to be a stranger around here after a day or two. It took some getting used to everyone being up in your business, but it worked out quite all right,” Ren agreed.

  Quite all right was just about all Norah hoped for.

  —FORTY-THREE—

  “Another day?” Nan said, frowning. She was agitated this afternoon and Banks was glad he’d stuck around despite her insistence he head out and go back to the office. Her desire to get him in the same room with Norah again was so thinly veiled she might as well have been wearing a neon sign that said it.

  His duties, right now though, were here. Kerri would enjoy the extra cash in her pocket from staying at his ranch to take care of the horses and Crash. Carter had called in that Reicher boy to help out. Everything was taken care of. He could keep his focus on Nan, despite the fact that she was trying very hard to have him move his focus elsewhere.

  “At least another day. Maybe two or three. Just want to see those blood pressure numbers in a safe range, Aida,” Dr. Fields said in what sounded like the gentlest tone he could muster. Nan and the doctor had been friends for a long time, and he treated her well. He was the only person in the world she allowed to call her by her real name, and that was probably because they’d gone to school together. He sounded sweet as sugar delivering news that had to be terribly disappointing to Nan.

  “It’s better to be safe than sorry, right? Besides,” Banks said, winking at the doctor standing across the bed as he said it. “Dr. Fields knows you’re not going to rest the way you need to if he lets you go home.”

  The doctor chuckled.

  “That’s right. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a few more rounds to do, but I’ll check in on you before I head for home, okay?”

  And with that, he was gone.

  “Well if I can’t go home, the least you can do is go home.”

  He shook his head at her insistence. Again with the going home. He would have bet on her next words being something about living his life.

  “You need to get out of here. Go live your life a little. Call Norah.”

  Again with Norah. Nan had always been a bit of a matchmaker—and if not that, she always dispensed the kind of advice that encouraged young men to pick good women, and to treat them right. She’d convinced Finn Baylor that he could move on with Lily after his first wife had passed away. She’d knocked sense into Dane Baylor too, if memory served correctly. She was definitely not used to meeting the resistance she was getting from him, but she must have forgotten that she’d forged his stubbornness hersel
f. She’d raised him to stand strong in his convictions and right now his convictions were that he needed to take care of his ailing grandmother more than he needed to scratch a carnal itch with Norah.

  Nan had been right before, but she wasn’t right this time.

  “You should be building a life for the two—three of you, not babysitting your old grandmother.”

  “Nan. I was. And that ended up with you in a car accident, with a pre-existing medical condition you couldn’t tell me about because I wasn’t around or else we could have maybe avoided that car accident.”

  Nan’s brow dropped and her face folded into what could only be described as a glare. It was a jarring sight on Nan’s typically pleasant face and Banks suspected he wasn’t going to like what he was about to hear.

  “Did it ever occur to you that I might have wanted some privacy around that? The very last thing in the world I want is for you to coddle me, and right next to that is putting your life on hold to take care of me. When it’s my time to go, be surprised for a minute, then put me in a pine box and move on with your life.”

  “You took care of me, now it’s my turn to take care of you,” he said, stuffing down all kinds of emotions he couldn’t even begin to name at the thought of putting Nan in a pine box and moving on. He tried not to think about it, believing Nan had decades left, and she probably wasn’t ready to leave Earth just yet, so long as she took care of herself, but the truth was that he’d now lived longer with Nan than the years he had left with her and that was a hard pill to swallow.

  “What, so you’re just going to be a bachelor-caretaker until your old Nan croaks?” she asked, her voice lighter.

  It didn’t change Banks’ mood. He didn’t justify her ridiculous question with an answer.

  “Well if you don’t start living, I’m just not gonna die. And I’ll be the biggest pain in your ass. You’ll be saddled with me forever.”

  That pulled a tiny laugh out of him. He shook his head. He suspected she would be stubborn enough to follow through on that threat.