I LIKE THE WAY YOU HURT: A Dark Interracial High School Bully Romance

by Lorrain Allen

  I hope during my first year of college, I’ll forget all about the boy who stole my heart in Montgomery, West Virginia. Something tells me that Maverick won’t be easily forgotten. I’m looking forward to spending my summer with Lo and Micah. They’ll help me move on. Saint still hasn’t spoken to me since Halloween. Lo and Micah give me updates about him. He’s hurting and I hate that it’s me who caused the pain.

  I see Maverick’s jeep come into view before he turns into the parking lot. He parks his jeep in the first available spot. Dee and Nix are with him. The press converges around the jeep before they have a changer to open the doors. There are more students outside than usual, just being nosy no doubt. Dee and Nix exit the jeep first, pushing through the press to walk around to the driver’s door. When Maverick steps out and closes his door, Dee steps to his left and Nix is at his right.

  They’re strong separately, but together they’re impregnable. They make their way to the entrance of the school. Maverick’s eyes connect with mine across the parking lot. As we continue to hold each other’s gaze, my heart beats faster. Reporters have their microphones in Maverick’s face as he ignores the questions being tossed at him. Maverick breaks eye contact with me as the trio walks into the school.

  I hear the whispers as I walk in the hall, but it doesn’t bother me. These motherfuckers know better than to approach me directly.

  “You good?” Nix asks me.

  “I’m cool,” I say as I roll my neck.

  John is still in jail. Most likely his bail will be denied. His charges are too severe. I knew what the backlash would be once I opened this particular can of worms, but it had to be done. I’m ready to face whatever I need to.

  Seeing Cocoa made this situation more bearable. Damn, I miss her. I wanted to walk over to Cocoa and take her in my arms. She looked like an angel across the parking lot, with the sun behind her, lighting her caramel-colored hair.

  When I reach my locker, Mr. Green is waiting for me.

  So the bullshit begins.

  “Maverick, can you follow me to my office, please?” Mr. Green asks.

  When I enter Mr. Green’s office, there are several people inside. The sheriff, a woman I don’t know, and Uncle Tim, my mother’s twin.

  “What the fuck are you doing here?” I yell.

  “Calm down, son,” says the sheriff.

  “I’m not your fucking son.”

  “Maverick, will you have a seat?” asks the unknown woman.

  “No, I’ll stand. Who the fuck are you, anyway?”

  What the hell is this?

  “Maverick, my name is Millie Jones,” she tells me. “I’m a social worker.”

  “Why are you here?”

  “It’s my job to ensure that you have a guardian while your father awaits trial,” says Ms. Jones.

  “I don’t need anyone to watch over me. I’ll be eighteen in a few months.”

  “You’re a minor until you turn eighteen,” Mr. Green informs me.

  “Dee’s parents have agreed to let me stay with them for the rest of the school year.”

  “The decision isn’t up to you,” the sheriff tells me.

  “I would like to speak to my nephew, alone.” The bastard finally speaks.

  When everyone leaves, I finally face the asshole who abandoned me as a child.

  “You have the fucking nerve to show up after all this time. I don’t need you anymore. You’re eleven years too late.”

  He stands up then walks over to me.

  “Stop right there,” I demand as my hands form into fists. If he gets too close, I’ll be too tempted to kick his ass.

  “I don’t know what your father told you.”

  “Don’t call him my father!” I yell.

  “I’m sorry. Whatever he told you is a lie. I never abandoned you. For years, I tried to talk your mother into leaving John. When she finally found the courage to make her move, John found out. He beat her down until she didn’t have a will of her own anymore. She wasn’t the sister I grew up with. She became this lifeless person I didn’t recognize. After her suicide, I filed for custody of you, but I had no proof of the allegations I leveled against your father. I lost the custody battle over you, and your father filed a defamation of character lawsuit against me. It took me years to recover financially after that. I had no legal rights to you. Your father filed a restraining order against me. I couldn’t go anywhere near him, or you.”

  All this time, I fucking hated him.

  “When the story about John reached me, I made plans to be reunited with you as soon as possible.”

  “I don’t need your protection anymore.”

  “I know you don’t, but I want you to know that I’m sorry I couldn’t be the savior you needed. There wasn’t a day that went by that you weren’t in my thoughts. I want you to stay with me in Minnesota.”

  “No, I have my life here.”

  “Maverick, please hear me out. I’ve always planned to contact you once you turned eighteen. The family wants to build a relationship with you. I’m married with children, and I’ve told your cousins all about you. I filed a motion for legal guardianship over you. Things are going to get a lot worse before they get better. You need to get away from this town and the press. The principal has agreed to let you complete all school work from Minnesota under the current circumstances. He’ll discuss this with your teachers. Also, this is the only time I’ll have to catch up with you before you go to college. I want to make up for lost time.”

  If I agree to live with him, at least I’ll be away from Cocoa. If I stay here, I know there’s no way I’d be able to leave her alone. Not when I’d see her at school every day. What about when she starts to date someone like Nix said? I’d lose my fucking mind. Maybe it is better for me to view this madness at a distance. I won’t have to enroll in a new school. I have a lot of good memories in this town, but the bad far outweighs the good. I’ll keep in touch with Dee and Nix. We’ll be attending the same college like we planned, so we’ll be reunited soon.

  I don’t care about going to prom or walking across a stage to receive my high school diploma, that’s trivial shit. My goal has always been to get back at John. I accomplished the first half of my goal, showing the true character of the false God this town has worshiped all these years. The second half of my goal is to see John behind bars for years to come.

  “I’ll go.”

  5 ½ Months Later

  It’s finally graduation day. After today, I begin the next chapter in my life. I’m going to spend the next week with my mom then travel to Los Angeles for a few weeks, and then I’ll be off to my grandmother’s house for a week. I’ll head back to Montgomery to spend the last week of summer with my mom before going to college. I received a few acceptance letters, but I chose to attend Moody College of Communication at The University of Texas in Austin. I don’t analyze the reasons why I decide to attend this college.

  The craziness of the last several months has died down just a little. The press has dispersed, in their eyes, the story is old news, but the recent events will never be forgotten by the community. The scandal has rocked the town of Montgomery to its core. So much more came out than anyone could imagine. Apparently, Mr. Carter made a deal with several families for lighter sentences in exchange for sexual favors with wives, daughters, granddaughters, etc. My heart hurts for the little girls who were sold by their own families. Maverick’s house sits with a ‘For Sale’ sign displayed outside.

  It’s profound how one man can have an effect on the lives of so many people. There was no trial. The evidence was too overwhelming for any hopes of a not-guilty verdict, mistrial, or acquittal. Victoria was in one of the videos. I was not shocked by that bit of news. She was a willing participant. Too embarrassed about the scandal, she left town with her family. Mr. Carter was sentenced to forty-seven years in prison. He has faced several lawsuits from his victims, but he settled out of court for an undisclosed amount.

  I haven’t seen Maverick since that
day in the parking lot. I learned he lives with an uncle in Minnesota. With Maverick gone, the press descended on Dee and Nix for answers, but they would not answer any questions. They would not betray their friend. I know they’ve been in constant contact with Maverick since his departure. I do hang out with them sometimes. They come to the pizzeria often, and I see them when I visit Kayla. I wonder if he’s ever asked about me or thinks about me. He’s always in my thoughts. I really miss him. I haven’t dated or even looked at another guy, and it’s because of him.

  My mom confronted me about the change in my behavior. When Maverick moved away, it was like a part of me left with him. The flood gates opened, and I finally told her everything. No detail was spared. I could barely talk through my tears. She didn’t judge me. Instead, she offered comfort and words of wisdom.

  “Come on Cocoa, or you’re going to be late for your own graduation,” says my mom from the entrance to my room.

  “I’m coming, I’m coming,” I reply as I place the red cap on my head. I pull on the gown of the same color with the school’s logo on the right.

  I’m wearing a satin sleeveless white dress and high heels the same color. My curls hang around my face. I decide to forego makeup, just wearing a little lip gloss. When I leave my room, Mom and Michael are waiting at the front door. My mom is more excited than me.

  “You look beautiful,” Michael says, kissing me on the cheek.

  “Thank you.”

  We bustle out of the door, walking to the car to head to Montgomery Academy for my senior class graduation.

  Three hours later, graduation is over. Family, friends, and students cover the school grounds, socializing and taking pictures. After my mom is satisfied with the three dozen pictures she’s taken of me, I walk over to Jamal, Kate, and Lucy. We talk a little and take more pictures. Kayla runs over, latching onto my arm.

  “Come take pictures with us,” she says, pulling me to where Dee and Nix are standing.

  “Welcome to adulthood,” I tell them.

  “Congrats Cocoa, we made it,” Dee yells, picking me up to swing me in a circle.

  I take even more pictures with them and Kayla.

  “Congratulations.”

  All conversation within our group ceases. I would recognize that voice anywhere. I turn in the direction of the voice I’ve been dreaming of for the last several months.

  “Mav,” shouts Nix in happiness.

  “You didn’t tell us you would be here,” says Dee.

  “I wanted it to be a surprise.”

  I speak to them, but my eyes are on her. The image of Cocoa I have in my memory doesn’t do her justice. There wasn’t a day that went by I hadn’t thought about her. I asked Dee and Nix about her nearly every day. I came back here for her. I was given a glimpse of paradise and now I can’t live without it.

  Dee, Nix, and Kayla all surround me with hugs of excitement, but Cocoa just stands there, watching me. She doesn’t make a move or say a word.

  “Oh, did you buy these roses for little ole me?” jokes Nix.

  “In your dreams,” I reply.

  I walk over to Cocoa to give her the dozen red roses I brought for her. She accepts them but still doesn’t say a word. She looks like she can’t quite believe I’m here.

  “Can I talk to you alone?”

  Cocoa nods but stays where she is. I grasp her hand, pulling her towards my jeep. Dee, Nix, and Kayla watch us openly, making no attempt to hide their interest. I open the passenger door for Cocoa, helping her inside before closing the door. I climb into the driver seat then exit the parking lot. Cocoa’s cell phone rings.

  “Hello. Yes, Mom, I’m sorry. I’m with a friend. I know, we can have a celebration dinner another time. I’ll be home soon. Bye.”

  The rest of the drive is silent.

  I drive to a nearby park. I exit the jeep and walk around to the passenger side to open the door for Cocoa. Before Cocoa can make a move, I swing her legs towards me to step between them. The roses fall to the ground. I don’t know who moves first, maybe we met in the middle. Our lips crash together as we clutch each other as I grind between her thighs. My thirst is finally being quenched after almost six fucking months of dehydration. I end the kiss to grasp each side of her face.

  “I love you Cocoa. I can’t live the rest of my life in this world not knowing where you are. I’m so sorry for how I treated you. The names I called you are unforgivable, but I want you to know that I’m becoming a better person. I didn’t fuck Victoria. I was going to, but I couldn’t go through with it. You are the only girl I want.”

  “I love you, too, Maverick. I was so afraid I’d never see you again. I wanted to contact you, but you were so confusing. I didn’t know which version of you I would find.”

  “I’ve been seeing a therapist and attending anger management sessions since moving to Minnesota. I did it so I can find closure, but I mostly did it because of you. I want to be the person you need me to be. I want you in my life. Can you forgive me?”

  I kiss her lightly on the lips.

  “Yes. Just promise me that you’ll continue therapy and anger management. You can’t overcome what you’ve been through in just several months.”

  “I’ll do anything for you as long as you stay with me. I want to go to Los Angeles with you. I want to spend as much time with you as possible during the summer.”

  “I’m attending Moody College of Communication, so I’ll be a three-and-a-half-hour drive from you. It’s only an hour by plane.”

  A big smile spreads across my face.

  “I know a lot of shit has happened between us, but let’s start over,” I say.

  “I would like that.”

  10 Months Later

  “I can’t believe that, in two days, spring break will be over, and we’ll have to be apart again,” I grumble while I cuddle with Maverick on the hotel bed.

  We traveled to Miami for spring break with Lo, Micah, Dee, Nix, Jamal, Kate, and Lucy. We’re having a great time and making memories. Saint decided not to come. Though we reconnected when I visited Los Angeles over the summer, our friendship hasn’t been fully restored, especially since Maverick came with me. They nearly came to blows when they saw each other. I hope that one day, we can move past this, but I won’t force the issue. I don’t think Saint will ever accept that Maverick and I are together. Lo and Micah have accepted Maverick for the most part, which makes me happy. I don’t think I would’ve survived losing their friendship, too.

  Maverick and I had a rocky start, but now our relationship is stronger than ever. He sees a therapist twice a week near his campus and goes to an anger management group session once a week. He’s still fighting his demons, but he’s trying, and that’s what counts. John has continually attempted to reach out to him, but for Maverick, he’s already dead. Maverick is developing a strong bond with his family on his mom’s side. His uncle played an important role in Maverick’s healing. Tim is supportive, encouraging, and doesn’t cast judgment on Maverick over his sudden mood swings. Maverick and I spent the winter break with his family. It’s a home filled with love and laughter, everything Maverick was denied as a child.

  Maverick chuckles. “We see each other nearly every weekend and sometimes during the week. Soon, school will be over, and we’ll be spending the whole summer together.”

  “I know, but it’s still not enough,” I pout.

  “You look so adorable when you pout,” says Maverick, kissing my forehead.

  My head is lying on his chest while my fingers trace the hard ridges of his muscles. We’re naked, tangled in the sheets after hours of sex. I will never get enough of him. I slide my hand from his abs to grip his dick.

  “Come on, you’re trying to kill me. We have to get a few hours of sleep before we face the day. You know they’ll all be knocking on our door soon.”

  I groan loudly. “Let’s stay in bed all day.”

  “You know they won’t let us do that.”

  I drag my hand from his dick as
I roll onto my back, sighing.

  “By the way, tell Dee to stay away from Lucy. I see how he looks at her. She’s innocent and I don’t want him breaking her heart.”

  “Hey, Dee and Lucy are adults, so it’s none of our business. What about Micah chasing after Kate?”

  “Kate is a big girl, so she can take care of herself. She knows Micah’s a big man whore.”

  “I think Dee really likes Lucy,” says Maverick.

  I turn, propping my elbow on the bed then placing my head in my upturned hand.

  “You really think so?” I ask, looking down at him.

  “Hell yeah, he acts like a complete fucking idiot when she’s around. You haven’t noticed?”

  I shake my head.

  “Dee is a lot of things, but he won’t use Lucy and then throw her away like a used tissue. Let them find their own way. They’ll get it eventually, we did.”

  He’s right. I’m going to stay out of it unless Lucy comes to me for advice. Maverick and I are living proof that opposites do attract.

  “Okay, I’ll mind my business.”

  “Good.”

  “I have something for you,” Maverick says and leaves the bed.

  I roll over so that I can watch his sexy firm ass as he walks over to his suitcase, then rummages through the contents. Once he retrieves what he’s looking for, he returns to the bed. His hand is in a fist, so I can’t see what’s in it. He gets on his knees.

  “Cocoa, I know you’ve forgiven me for how I treated you and all the horrible names I called you, but I can’t seem to forgive myself.”

  When he opens his hand, I see a ring sitting in the middle of his palm. He grasps my right hand to slide the ring down my ring finger.

  “I promise to never call you such ugly names again and to always give you the utmost respect because you deserve no less. I will give you one hundred and ten percent of myself every day. Thank you for not giving up on me. You brought light to my darkness.”