Whoops! We're In Big Trouble Now

by Adele Abbott

  Chapter 10

  It was all happening so quickly that Dorothy’s head was spinning. Tilly had gone to see the estate agent to sort out the lease. Fortunately, the unit was being let on a ‘quick-in, quick-out’ basis, which meant they could be in within a matter of days. It also meant they would only have to give a month’s notice to quit if things didn’t work out. Not that failure was an option. Having told the bookshop owner where he could shove his job, she would probably never get another one, so this business had to succeed. Tilly was also going to see about getting the flyers printed. Dorothy had been tasked with talking to Donny about the fridges to see if he could come up with a better deal than those that Tilly had already sourced. She also had to ask Neil to talk to his friend in the motor trade about a van.

  She took the bus into town, but when she arrived at Donny’s shop, there was a queue that stretched out of the door. Rather than hanging around, she decided to pay a quick visit to the bookshop, to see how Molly was getting on. Dorothy planned to return to the sandwich shop a little later, by which time it should have quietened down.

  “You can’t have your job back.” Molly was at the computer.

  “Good morning to you, too. I’m fine, thanks for asking.”

  “You haven’t changed your mind, have you?”

  “As it happens, no, but I didn’t expect you to be quite so pleased to get rid of me.”

  “I’m not. Well, I suppose I am in a way because the owner came around yesterday after you’d walked out, and he’s made me the manager.”

  “He’s done what?”

  “You don’t have to look so shocked.”

  “Are you getting more money?”

  “Yeah, of course. Not straight away, though, but I will after a probation period.”

  “I see.” There’s one born every minute, Dorothy thought, but didn’t say.

  “And he said that I can set on a new assistant.”

  “That’s great.”

  “What do you want, anyway? I’m kind of busy.” Molly began to tap away on the computer.

  “I see you’ve got that thing mended.”

  “Yeah, I managed to persuade Nobby to come around and sort it out.”

  “Of course you did.”

  “The owner asked me to update all the stock records.”

  “Right, well I’d better leave you to it, then. I only popped in on my way to see Donny.”

  Molly was no longer listening to her.

  “Bye, then.”

  To say Dorothy was gobsmacked would have been an understatement. She’d barely been able to get Molly to lift a finger in that shop, but now she was supposedly managing the place. That was bound to go well. And as for the promised pay rise, Molly had better not hold her breath.

  ***

  Neil had been hoping that the pub would be busy so that he and Socky could go in search of Getmore and Bella without attracting any attention. It didn’t quite work out that way; Neil counted no more than six other customers in the pub.

  “Hi! What can I get you?” The eager young man behind the bar greeted Neil with a smile.

  “Err—I’ll have a pint, please.”

  “Lager? Bitter? Mild?”

  “Bitter, please.”

  “Which one? We have sixteen.”

  “Sixteen?”

  “It’s usually twenty, but we’re waiting on a delivery.”

  “Right. Which one do you recommend?”

  “Old Pogmore is very popular.”

  “Okay, I’ll have that.”

  Once he had his beer, he took a seat in a quiet booth near the back of the room. Socky took the seat opposite him.

  “Do you have any idea where Getmore will be?” Neil took a sip of his beer, and immediately pulled a sour face. “This is awful.”

  “The cad is down there.” Socky gestured to the floor. “Below our feet.”

  “In the cellar? Are you sure?”

  “Positive. I can smell the rat from here.”

  “Okay. We’ll need to create a diversion so that we can get down there unnoticed.” Neil glanced around again. “Here’s the plan. You—” He stopped mid-sentence, and stared at the pint glass, which was now almost empty. “Did you just drink that?”

  “Old Pogmore brews a fine ale.”

  “Never mind Old Pogmore. I need you to be sober. Don’t you remember what happened the last time you got drunk?”

  “It would take more than one flagon of this ale to see Tobias Fotheringham inebriated.”

  “Don’t drink any more. Listen up, this is the plan.”

  ***

  “If it isn’t my favourite vampire.” Donny greeted Dorothy with that huge grin of his.

  “Don’t call me that in public.”

  He glanced around at the empty shop. “There’s only you and me in here.”

  “I don’t care. I don’t want you to call me that. I just need a quick word.”

  “About the cash?”

  “No, why? You haven’t changed your mind about that, have you?”

  “Of course not. I don’t go back on my promises.”

  “That’s just as well because I’ve told the owner of the bookshop to shove his job.”

  “This new business of yours had better be a success then. What did Molly say when you quit?”

  “She was surprised, but I reckon she’s quite pleased about it now.”

  “Why would she be pleased? You and she got on alright, didn’t you?”

  “Yeah, most of the time, but I’ve just been in the shop, and the owner has made her the new manager.”

  “Molly?” Donny laughed. “I like the girl, but she couldn’t manage her own handbag.”

  “It’s not my problem now. I came to ask you about fridges.”

  “You really know how to turn a man on, don’t you?”

  “Be serious.”

  “Okay, sorry. What do you want to know about them?”

  “We have to buy some for the business. Tilly reckons we’ll need about five, but we can’t afford to pay much for them. I thought you might have a contact where we could get some second-hand.”

  “It’ll cost you.”

  “Stop messing around, Donny. Do you know anyone or not?”

  “I do. I know just the man you need, and if you go on another date with me, I’ll give you his card.”

  “Alright, I agree.”

  “Is that a promise?”

  “Yes, I’ve just said so, haven’t I?”

  “Great.” Donny went to the back of the shop and searched through a drawer. “Here it is. Tell him I sent you. You won’t get better for the money.”

  “Thanks.” She took the card from him. “I’d better get back.”

  “Okay, and Dorothy?”

  “What now?”

  “I notice you didn’t argue this time when I called it a date.”

  ***

  Unseen by anyone except for Neil, Socky made his way behind the bar. Stacked up next to the sink were dozens of glasses, waiting to be washed. Once Socky was level with the sink, he turned to Neil who gave him the thumbs up.

  The sound of breaking glass caused the staff and customers to stop what they were doing, and look around to see what was happening.

  As soon as Socky was back with Neil, the two of them made their way down to the basement.

  “It’s creepy down here.” Neil held on tight to the handrail, as he followed Socky down the stone steps.

  “Keep close to me. I will protect you.”

  “I can’t see a thing,” Neil said, once they’d reached the bottom of the steps. “Where’s the light?”

  “Is this what you’re looking for?”

  The man’s voice sent a shiver down Neil’s spine, and he was all set to run back up the steps when a light came on, illuminating the room.

  Standing there was a diminutive man, dressed in clothes very similar to those favoured by Socky. Next to him was the most beautiful woman Neil had ever seen.

  “What brings you
here, Tobias?” the man spat out the words.

  “I’m here to reclaim the hand of my one true love.”

  “You’ve had a wasted journey, then. Bella is with me now.” He turned to the woman. “Tell him, Bella.”

  “I’m sorry, Tobias.” Her voice was soft, and barely audible. “You’ve been so distracted recently, worrying about what has become of your factory, that you seem to have no time for me.”

  “You’re right, Bella,” Socky conceded. “And that was inexcusable. But if you come back, I promise that I will never again allow myself to become distracted in that way. You will be my focus every day for eternity.”

  “You’re too late, Tobias.” Getmore took a step forward so that he was in Socky’s face. “Why don’t you get out of here, and take your little friend with you?”

  “If I might say something?” Neil edged closer to Getmore.

  “Who is this handsome young thing?” Bella smiled at Neil.

  Her words caught Neil by surprise, and he blushed slightly before regaining his composure. “I’m a friend of Tobias Fotheringham, and I’m here to reveal Getmore for the philanderer he really is.”

  “How dare you?” Getmore snarled at Neil. “I’ve a good mind to carve you up.”

  “Let him speak.” Bella put a hand on Getmore’s arm. “What do you have to say, young man?”

  “This man, Getmore, is not worthy of your hand. He frequents wild parties full of loose women.”

  “How dare you accuse me of such a thing?” Getmore looked like he wanted to kill Neil.

  “I can prove it.” Neil took another step closer to Getmore.

  “This I would like to see.” Getmore sneered.

  “Here is my proof.” Neil quickly put a hand in Getmore’s jacket pocket and, with the help of a little magic, pulled out a pair of bloomers.

  “How could you?” Bella stepped away from Getmore. “You said I was the only one.”

  “You are.” Getmore was flustered now. “I don’t know how those came to be there.”

  “He’s lying,” Neil said. “I know for a fact that he regularly attends parties thrown by Mad Maggie in the old sock factory.”

  “Maggie? That good-for-nothing harlot?” Bella obviously recognised the name. “How could you?”

  “It’s all lies!” Getmore protested.

  “Tobias, take me away from this terrible man.” Bella took Socky’s hand. “I never want to lay eyes on him again.”

  “It will be my pleasure.”

  Socky, Bella, and Neil made their way up the stone steps. As they did, Neil could hear Getmore’s threats echoing behind him.

  “You’ll regret this day. Just see if you don’t.”

  ***

  Wilma and Wilber Hare were wearing matching jumpers. Wilma must have seen Susan staring at them because she said, “I knitted these myself.”

  “They’re very nice. Are those kangaroos?”

  “No, they’re actually hares. Like our name.”

  “Of course they are. I can see that now. Anyway, thank you so much for agreeing to talk to me today.”

  “It’s our pleasure,” Wilber said. “It’s nice to be able to tell the story to someone who isn’t going to laugh or poke fun at us.”

  “You can rest assured that this is a serious investigation.”

  “What exactly would you like to know?” Wilma said.

  “Everything that happened that day. Why don’t you start at the beginning?”

  “We were in bed, weren’t we, Wilber?”

  He nodded. “It was one-thirty in the morning. I know because I checked the clock just after the noises had woken us.”

  “What kind of noises?” Susan was making notes as they spoke.

  “A kind of growling,” Wilma said. “And lots of banging around—knocking things over. It was coming from the back garden. At first, we thought it might be a cat or a dog, but it was much too loud for that. Wilber said he’d go and see what it was. I didn’t want him to; I said we should call the police, but he went outside anyway, didn’t you?”

  “I took my flare gun with me.”

  “Did you say flare gun?” Susan looked up from her note-taking.

  “Wilber is a keen sailor. I don’t normally like him keeping a flare gun in the house, but that particular night, I was glad he had it with him.”

  “What happened when you got outside?”

  “As soon as I stepped into the garden, I saw the beast. It was enormous—standing on its hind legs. It must have caught my scent because it came charging straight at me.”

  “I was watching from the bedroom window,” Wilma said. “I thought he was done for.”

  “It soon changed its mind when I fired the first flare.” Wilber grinned.

  “Did you hit it?” Susan said.

  “No. I fired over its head, but if it had kept coming, I would have got it with the second shot.”

  “Did either of you get a good look at it?”

  “Not at first, but when the flare went off, we both did. It was like a giant wolf.”

  Susan took her phone out of her bag, and showed them the photo of the painting. “Did it look anything like this?”

  “That’s it!” Wilma said. “That’s the beast that was in our back garden.”

  Chapter 11

  “How did you get on at the estate agents?” Dorothy was back at Tilly’s flat.

  “Brilliantly!” Tilly gushed. “And, because it’s a quick-in, quick-out lease, I was able to sign all the paperwork there and then. I had to pay for one month’s rent upfront, but that’s okay because it was less than we’d budgeted for anyway.”

  “When can we move in?”

  “That’s the best part.” Tilly held up a set of keys. “Whenever we want to.”

  “Wow! This is really happening, isn’t it?”

  “That’s not all. I went to see Pamela. She’s the old school friend I mentioned who works at the copy shop. She actually knocked up a couple of designs for the flyers while I was there. They’re nothing too fancy, but they do the job.” Tilly took a sheet of paper from her bag. “This mock-up is only black and white, but it gives you an idea of how it’ll look.”

  “T & D Supplies?”

  “We never actually discussed what we’d call our business, so when Pamela asked what name we wanted to use, I said the first thing that came into my head. Are you okay with that?”

  “It doesn’t say what it is we’ll be supplying.”

  “That’s the whole point. We can hardly have T & D Blood Supplies, can we? Can you imagine the attention it might attract if we had that name on the front of the unit?”

  “I hadn’t thought about that.”

  “The flyer makes it clear what we’ll be supplying, and we’ll only hand those out to vampires, so that won’t be a problem.”

  “When will they be ready?”

  “Tomorrow morning.”

  “That soon? How come?”

  “I promised Pamela a discount on her first month’s order, so she pushed the print-job through for me.”

  “She said she would order blood from us?”

  “Yeah, and without me even asking. It looks like we have our first customer.”

  “Fantastic!”

  “Once we’ve got the flyers, I thought we could go out tomorrow and start handing them out.”

  “I’d be up for that.”

  “How did you get on with the fridges and the van?”

  “I spoke to Donny. He gave me a card for a guy who he reckons will do us a great deal on the fridges, so I got in touch with him, and asked him to call you this evening with some prices. I thought you could compare them to those you already have.”

  “Sounds good. What about the van?”

  “I haven’t had a chance to speak to Neil yet. He wasn’t in when I checked before I came up here. I’ll have a word with him tonight.”

  Tilly walked over to the fridge and took out a bottle of champagne.

  “What’s that for?”

/>   “I picked it up in town earlier. It’s only the cheap stuff.” She poured out two glasses, and handed one to Dorothy. “To T & D Supplies.”

  “To T & D!”

  ***

  Neil, Socky and Bella were back at the apartment. Socky had never once let go of Bella’s hand since they’d left The Pillory.

  “Welcome back to your forever home, my sweet lady.” Socky lifted her hand to his lips. “I swear that nothing will ever distract me from you again.”

  “Thank you, Tobias.”

  “I’m sorry to interrupt such a romantic scene,” Neil said. “But it’s time for you to fulfil your part of our bargain, Tobias.”

  “What bargain do you refer to?” Bella said.

  “Tis nothing to worry your sweet head about, my darling Bella. I told this young man that if he helped me to win back your hand, I would ensure that Maggie removed herself from this building once and for all.”

  “And all of her friends,” Neil reminded him.

  “Tobias is fully aware of the terms of our contract.” He turned to Bella. “If you will excuse me for a few minutes, I will go and attend to this matter.”

  “Of course.”

  Moments later, Socky disappeared, leaving a rather nervous Neil alone with Bella.

  “So, tell me, young man.” She moved closer to him. “What name do you go by?”

  “I’m Neil, Lady Markham.”

  “What a wonderful name, and please, you must call me Bella.”

  “Okay, err—Bella.”

  “Will you be sharing this accommodation with us, Neil?”

  “Err, yeah, I suppose so. This is my bedroom.”

  “Indeed.” She walked over to the bed, and kneaded the mattress. “This bed is very comfortable. Is this where you entertain your lady friends?”

  By now, Neil was feeling more than a little hot under the collar, and was wishing Socky would hurry back. “I don’t actually have a lady friend at the moment.”

  “I find that hard to believe.” She walked back over to Neil, and put her hand around his wrist. “Do you have any idea how long it is since I lay down with a man who had a pulse?”

  “I—err—”

  “Tis done!” Socky reappeared. In the nick of time as far as Neil was concerned. “Maggie and the rest of her motley crew will not trouble us again.”