Take It SLOW

by AKM Miles

  “Mano, don’t worry. I deserve any condemnation that Daniel wants to heap on me. I know it. We all know it. I’ll go to my grave with the regret of what I’ve put him through because of my stupidity and ignorance in that one most important moment of his life. You’re right, it’s a good idea. Go on with your plan.”

  Nick fought the urge to put his head down in shame. He’d lived with that feeling for two years now. Shame, fear, self-recrimination—the list was long and full of adjectives that all meant the same thing. He’d failed in the one thing that had defined him, made him proud to begin with. He had been a good parent to a wonderful young man. “Had” being the operative word.

  “Well, what if I can make some kind of contact with him and get him to go to the bathroom, or maybe we could have Diana tell him to, if we can get him away from this Jack guy for a few seconds. I could talk to him in the bathroom and tell him that there’s a safe place for him to go if he wants to get away from his situation. I’ll say his father has been looking for him since the day he left home and we’re there to help him if he wants it. I can get a read on what he wants in just a few minutes.”

  “That sounds like a good idea, but then what? You just walk out and go to the pick-up? I’ll have my car. Jack won’t just let him walk away. Do we need to get the police involved?” Nick asked, looking from one to the other.

  There was silence at the table for a few seconds as everyone thought about that one.

  “I think that would make it worse for Daniel. We don’t know what the situation is with this man. Daniel might not want to do that, or he might be afraid of them. If we can just get him away without them, I think it would be better. The less drama we can manage would be best for him, I think, anyway.” Mano sounded like he was hesitant to put his thoughts out there.

  “Hey, I value your insight. You’ve been through your own drama and know how traumatic it is, so I’ll go with your ideas. Thank you.” Nick was grateful for Mano’s insights. Mano had escaped a violent past only to have it follow him all the way from Tampa to Nashville. He’d been taken back, charged with murder, and Easy had gone down to get him. After a lot of drama, they’d come home, with Mano cleared and the two of them firmly together for the future.

  “You know, I think that plan has merit. Ease Daniel into the plan. When he’s in the bathroom, Nick and I can join Jack in his booth and inform him that we’re taking Daniel home and if he’s got a problem with it he can take it up with the police that we have waiting for our call. He won’t know we don’t plan on that and if it becomes necessary, we’ll make it the truth. I’ll scoot in beside Jack so he can’t get out, and Nick can face him and tell him that he’s Daniel’s father and if he doesn’t want to face prosecution, he will leave quietly and never look for Daniel again. Does that sound like a plan?” Easy asked, looking at Nick.

  “It all sounds good, but you know things never go according to plan. We need to make them, but we have to be ready in case it doesn’t fall into place like we want. What if Daniel won’t go to the bathroom to talk with Mano? What if Jack puts up a loud ruckus and we end up with others coming to his rescue? Does he have friends who might take up for him? We don’t want to get Diana into trouble, either.” Nick was thinking over the things they’d said so far, looking for problems.

  “All we can do is be there, be ready for anything, and go with whatever happens. The most important thing is that we’re not leaving that place without Daniel. We’ll handle whatever happens. I don’t think Jack’s the type to have friends, and Diana won’t get into trouble. We’ll talk to the owner or manager when we get there and explain the situation. If they have a problem with it, we’ll work it out in the parking lot before they get inside. Failure is not an option this time, right?” Easy looked at Nick with those words, and Nick let a slow smile appear. He began to think this might work. Whatever happened, he would have his son back and they could start rebuilding their relationship. His heart was lighter for the first time in two years.

  § § § §

  Benny Adams had been watching people come and go from the truck stop across the road for a couple of hours now and still hadn’t gotten up enough nerve to go in. His uncle, a police officer, had told him about the place the last time Benny had been over there. He had stayed a few times with his uncle but was not comfortable being with him, even though Uncle Bert had been good to him. But Bert was dating a high school counselor, his wife having left him years ago for a trainer. The counselor lady seemed nice, and he didn’t want to ruin his uncle’s chances with her by being on the scene. Benny also didn’t like being the bone of contention between his uncle and his father, the man who’d kicked him out as soon as he admitted to being gay.

  He hadn’t really thought it would be that big a deal. His dad didn’t have that much to do with him to begin with, but he’d been wrong. Evidently to his father, being queer was totally unacceptable for anyone in his family. Fine, Benny was no longer part of the family. Not surprisingly, he didn’t miss his parents all that much. So sad, that. He shrugged. Not really.

  He’d spent the first part of the summer staying with this friend or that one, bumming really, which made him feel like, well, a bum. He just wanted to settle somewhere, but the odd jobs he’d gotten to scrape by on would not pay for a place. Maybe if he could get some help here, he could find a job. He used to have big dreams of working for human rights, equality, things like that. But those dreams fell away with each night spent on the street and each time, his former friends looked at him with either pity or contempt. It wasn’t easy to stay clean when you lived on the street or in shelters. Benny did his best, but he was tired. Tired of being hungry, dirty, and just lost.

  Benny marched across the street and opened the door before he could talk himself out of it. It was noisy inside, with music going, a TV on with the sound down, the cacophony of several conversations, and dishes and noise from the kitchen. He stood right inside the door, unsure of himself now that he’d acted. He hoped he didn’t look as scared as he felt.

  Looking around, he noticed a group of people in the back corner booth huddled together and talking together. An older lady glanced up and saw him, nudging the big guy next to her, who also looked over at him. Damn, that was a big man. Benny watched him get up and head for the door and he had turned to leave hurriedly.

  “Don’t leave. I’m Easy. Welcome to Mama Sasy’s.” The big man put his hand out for Benny to shake.

  Determined to not let his fear show, Benny reached out to shake hands with him. “Benny. Benny Adams.”

  By now, the lady had come to join them and the easy person looked to her, “Mom, this is Benny Adams. I think he’s here to see you.”

  “Well, I hope so. What a nice looking young man. Hi, hon, I’m Mama Sasy. You’ve met my son, Easy. Why don’t you come on in and I’ll get you something to eat and we can talk a little. I hope you’ve come to stay with us.” Without waiting for a reply she put her hand on Benny’s shoulder and sort of pulled him to a booth next to theirs in the back. He followed along as he was obviously supposed to do. Wait. Her son’s name was Easy?

  “So, your name is Easy?” Benny asked, looking way up to the big man.

  “E.A.S.Y. are my initials. Long story, but everybody calls me Easy. Let me introduce you to the main players here. This gorgeous man is mine. His name is Mano. This is Boddy, the best cook anywhere, well, except for Mom. The gentleman,” Easy pointed to a nice-looking older man, “is Nick Webster. He’s a friend to everyone here. Guys, this is Benny Adams.”

  The young Hispanic man that Easy had claimed as his spoke up to ask, “Hey, are you Officer Adams’ nephew? He told me about you. I’m so glad you came to us.”

  Well, that was interesting. “When did Uncle Bert tell you about me? Where’d you meet him?” Benny didn’t know if he liked being talked about by strangers.

  “He arrested me,” Mano said, bluntly.

  Benny raised his brows at this. Mano didn’t look like a criminal to him.

&n
bsp; “What for?” he couldn’t help asking, then thought it might be rude. “I’m sorry. None of my business.”

  “Murder.” Benny knew his brows went even higher this time.

  “Funny, Mano.” Easy looked from Mano to Benny and said, “He was wrongfully accused, and we had to go back to Tampa, where he’s from, to prove it, but it’s all good now. Officer Adams even came by and apologized when we got in.”

  “That sounds like Uncle Bert. He’s a good guy.”

  “He’s worried about you, I know that.” Mano looked at Benny closely and continued, “I told him that if you ever needed help, to come to Mama Sasy. I’m glad you did. Are you going to stay?”

  Benny looked around before saying, “I don’t know. I don’t even know why I’m here, but I didn’t really have anywhere to go, and he said to come here. I don’t even know what I want to do. I’m just tired, you know?”

  “Trust me, I know,” Mano said.

  Benny hadn’t even noticed that the really tall, skinny man had left, but he came back with a big glass of tea and a heaping plate of food, really delicious-smelling food. His stomach growled loudly and he ducked his head, embarrassed.

  “You came to the right place. Come on, hon, sit with me and we’ll work some things out. You all can finish your plan without me and fill me in later. I’ve got to find out about Benny Adams.” Mama sat down in the booth across from Benny and the tall man— Boddy?—set his plate down in front of him. People here had really weird names.

  In seconds, Benny didn’t care about names. He had nearly cleaned his whole plate before he looked up and saw Mama Sasy looking at him and smiling, approvingly.

  “I’m sorry. I’m acting like a pig, like…”

  “Like you’re hungry and you’ve been on your own for a while. Honey, don’t you worry. I’ve heard it all before, and I would like nothing better than to help you. That’s what I do here. We have a dorm in the back where you can stay. We have the basics there for you. No one will question you. Tell us what you want us to know and what you need, and we’ll do our best to help you.” Mama reached across and patted his hand.

  “Why? I mean, you don’t know me at all. Why would you help me?”

  “Lots of reasons, but the best one is that it makes me happy. I have a gay son. He had it easy, no pun intended, because his mother loves him unconditionally. I know that is not the case with so many young men. I hate that there is prejudice and hate and meanness in the world and if I can help, I will. If you’re hurt, you can take some time to rest up. If you want a job, we always have work here at the diner that needs doing, and we’ll pay you. If you want a job somewhere else, we’ll help you find one. Nick helps a lot with that. I think he knows everyone in Nashville. He helped Mano get a job at a dance studio, and Mano’s so happy there.”

  Benny just looked at her. “Wow.” That was all he was capable of right then. This just didn’t happen. He’d been so unhappy and lost after his father had kicked him out. His welcome was wearing thin at the few friends’ homes he’d been in through the summer. He’d even spent a few nights in shelters and other less-welcoming places. He didn’t have a cell phone anymore, so he had no way to get in touch with friends now. He didn’t fit in their life like he did when they were in school together. Most had gone on to college now, and he knew that wasn’t an option for him. How he’d wanted to, though.

  “What are you interested in, Benny?” Mama asked quietly.

  “Law. I know you’ll laugh, but…”

  “Honey, why would I laugh? That’s wonderful. What do you want to do with it? Be a lawyer? That’s what Nick is. I’m sure he’d help you get started.”

  “I want to work for human rights, but I don’t have enough money to go to college. I graduated in May, but then, well, things went downhill at home.” Benny ducked his head again.

  Mano spoke up from the booth behind him, letting him know that they were all listening to his conversation with Mama Sasy. “All Officer Adams told me when I met him was that your father kicked you out when he learned you were gay and that sometimes you stay with him. He was worried about you, so I told him about how great Mama Sasy was and that you should come here.”

  “Yeah, my dad didn’t take it so well when I told him I was gay, and he kicked me right out. It was like I was nothing to him. He never did, I mean, he never was all touchy-feely talking about love and stuff, but it was like he hated me all of a sudden. He wasn’t having a queer for a son.”

  Suddenly there was silence. Benny didn’t know what he’d said that was wrong, but it was like a bomb had dropped. He was afraid to turn around and look at the other table, but the look on Mama Sasy’s face when she looked over at the older man told him that it had something to do with Nick Webster.

  “I’m sorry. I don’t know what…” Benny didn’t get any further.

  “Young man,” Benny heard from behind him, “you have nothing to be sorry about. Everyone is embarrassed because of me. I told my son the same thing two years ago, and I lost him. He ran away and was gone before I came to my senses. I’ve looked for him since then. I will regret to my dying day that I wasn’t the parent he was hoping for when he tried to talk to me that day.”

  Benny didn’t know what to say. He had turned to look at the man talking and thought again how nice-looking he was, even with those tears in his eyes. Somehow he didn’t think his father would have any tears to shed for Benny’s absence.

  “That sucks. I mean, for you and for him. Don’t think my dad’s lookin’ for me.” It was just a statement of fact.

  “Well, you’ve got Mama Sasy in your corner now, so you’ll be fine. I heard you say you were interested in the law. I’m a lawyer, and after I take care of some things, I’d be glad to talk to you and see if there’s a way I can help.”

  “Um, what do I do now?” Benny asked, looking back at the lady across from him.

  “Well, now that you’ve got that skinny belly full, maybe you’d like to go with Boddy and see the dorm we have in the back. You’re welcome to stay here. We’ll help you get started. You take a couple of days to clean up, get some rest, and look around here. If you want to help out in the diner, we can always use it. Soon, we’ll find you something better, huh? I’d say there’s a lot of school in your future, if you’re interested in law.” Mama reached over again and patted his hand.

  The tall guy, Boddy, was standing by the table now and when Benny looked up at him, he pointed to the back and asked, “You ready to check out your new digs?”

  “I can’t believe, just like that, you all are going to let me stay here, work here even, without knowing more about me.” Benny wasn’t used to being treated like he had worth, not in a long time, anyway.

  “We know you’re Officer Adams’ nephew and that he cares about you. We know you need help. That’s all it takes here,” Mama Sasy said.

  Benny refused to let the stinging he felt behind his eyes develop into tears. He just couldn’t handle that, but he stood and put his hand out to Mama Sasy.

  “Thank you, ma’am. I do need to clean up, but then I’ll be glad to work for you if someone will show me what to do.”

  “Don’t you worry about that yet. Go back, get a bunk, a shower, and then rest some. We’ll get into the other later. Go on, now. You’re safe here.”

  Those three words hit Benny hard and he followed Boddy with his head down, hiding those damn tears. Safe.

  § § § §

  Those left in the corner booth of the diner resumed their planning of the rescue of Daniel Webster. Nick was quiet, contemplative. He knew he was drowning in a sea of remorse again. It was a feeling that he’d grown used to. He carried it like a burden, a cloak of shame. Knowing that his son was with an older man and that he was not treated well, and indeed may have been abused, was almost enough to bring Nick to his knees.

  “Nick! Stop it, right now. I know what you’re doing, and you need to quit, you hear me?” Mama Sasy wasn’t having it. She scooted back into the booth with Nick and tap
ped his arm, getting his attention as if her words hadn’t done the job.

  “Mo-om!” Easy said, the look on his face almost comical.

  “Relax, Easy. She’s right. I’m wallowing in it, thanks to that young man hitting the nail on the head. Those words seem to be ones that are used frequently in denying sons who are gay. How many more young men are out there because an idiot didn’t have the sense, the grace, to shut his mouth and listen to his son, give him a chance? It didn’t take me long to come to my senses, but it was too long for my Daniel. Look how he’s suffered because of that.” Despite Mama’s words, Nick was feeling leaden, heavy with guilt.

  “Old news, Nick. We’re not making less of it, but we have to look forward now. We need to figure this out. So, Mano has a good point. You don’t want to scare Daniel away, and he might not be ready to just walk away from this man and go with Nick. I’m also wondering if he’s likely to be willing to meet you, Mano, away from this man, Jack. Or maybe this Jack person won’t let him go in by himself, and then where would you be?” Mama asked.

  “What about seeing if the waitress, Diana, would slip him a note? If she spilled something near Jack, he would have to look to that, and she could give Daniel a short note that said something to the effect that help was waiting in the restroom. Then we could wait a few minutes to see if he got up to go in and seek that help,” Easy said, leaning back and putting his arm on the back of the booth. Mano scooted over to fit into the space that seemed to be left for him. Nick looked on, the sight almost bringing a smile. Daniel should have that. He should be able to lean into his love and know that his nearness was cherished as it was obvious that Mano’s was by Easy.

  “That might be a good idea. I say we plan for two or three scenarios and use the one that looks like it will work best. It may depend on how Daniel looks when they come in. For all we know, he might walk right into the restroom as soon as they come in, or Jack will. We have to have a plan for any contingency.” Nick was back in it now.