Don't Blink

by L. G. Davis

CHAPTER 31

  “You can go in now, Mrs. Lester.”

  “Thank you,” I say to the receptionist, who had been unable to find my appointment when I came with Jared.

  When I walked in, she smiled at me kindly and apologized again for last time, then she informed me that Dr. Collins is sick and Dr. Loraine Fern, a new doctor who has recently moved to Faypine from New York, will be filling in for her.

  Even though I’m disappointed that there’s yet another change to adjust to before the baby comes, I do hope Dr. Collins is okay. I already knew about Dr. Collins’ sickness before coming to the private practice. After school today, I’d dropped by Dreamy Pies and heard the gossip queen, Doris Charleston, telling some other women from around town that Dr. Collins had a stroke.

  I open the door and find a woman in her mid-thirties with long, straight hair and the longest eyelashes I’ve ever seen sitting on the other side of the glass desk. Some of her blonde hair hangs down the front of her chocolate blouse that matches her eyes. Her long legs that extend from a black, knee-length, flared skirt, are crossed under the table, fragile-looking feet pressed into velvet pumps the same color as her silk blouse.

  Even though Dr. Collins isn’t here, everything in her office looks the same: the silver safe under the table, the bouquet of white roses on the windowsill, next to a silver potpourri bowl that releases the scents of lemon and lavender, and the black radio on one of the shelves.

  A large painting hangs on the wall behind the desk. It’s of a woman sitting on a promenade, looking out at the ocean with black birds flying around her as though protecting her from something. The lonely woman in the painting reminds me of myself.

  Through the window, I catch sight of the grocery store parking lot, with people getting in and out of cars, or loading their shopping bags into trunks.

  Dr. Fern clears her throat, and I return my attention to her. Her smile is wide enough to reveal the small gap between her two front teeth.

  “Nice to meet you, Mrs. Lester.” She stands up from the desk and extends her hand to me. She has the smallest, most fragile hands I’d ever seen on anyone, but a surprisingly firm handshake.

  “Nice to meet you, too. I was sorry to hear about Dr. Collins. I hope she’s okay.”

  “Yes, me too. She’s my godmother.” Dr. Fern’s lips curl into a bittersweet smile. “Everything was just too much for her. We’ve been trying to convince her to retire for over two years. Hopefully, what happened will force her to slow down.”

  “Is she in the hospital right now? Is she allowed to have visitors?” Dr. Collins has been my doctor for as long as I’ve been in Faypine, and a witness to my earlier failed pregnancies. I’d like to drop by and wish her well.

  Dr. Fern shakes her head. “She’s no longer in the hospital. She’s back home. But, unfortunately, she’s not taking visitors. She needs to rest. I’m sure you understand.”

  “I do.” I really do. If they dare open Dr. Collins’ doors to the public, her house will flood with pies, flowers, and too many questions.

  Dr. Fern flips open my file and glances down. “You’re due in four weeks?” She glances up, smiling. “Looks like I’ll accompany you to the end of your pregnancy.”

  “You don’t think Dr. Collins will be back by then?” I twist my ring on my finger.

  “The stroke took a major toll on her. Her family managed to talk her into taking a few months off to recover. She’ll be out of town during that time.”

  “Oh, okay.” I swallow my disappointment. “Please wish her well from me.”

  “I’ll do that.”

  “Has everything been going well so far with your pregnancy? Any issues you’d like to discuss?” She runs a finger down a page in my folder. “It says here you requested an additional ultrasound. Is there a reason why?” She raises her gaze to mine. Her eyebrows furrow, then release.

  “I had two miscarriages before this pregnancy. I just want to make sure the baby is fine.”

  “I see.” She leans back in her chair. “Has Dr. Collins made you aware that your insurance might not cover it?”

  “She has. It’s fine. I’m ready to pay out of pocket.”

  “Good.” She looks at me for a long time, then blinks and leans back. “Have there been any issues since your last appointment? Do you feel fine?”

  “Yes.” I avert my gaze, focusing on the red scarf hanging from the handle of a closet. It looks familiar. I must have seen Dr. Collins wearing it. “No, no issues ... not really. Everything is fine.” I wish that were true.

  “That’s wonderful. Nothing like peace of mind for a smooth pregnancy.”

  I nod and force a smile. If only she knew. Peace of mind is a luxury I can’t afford right now. “Do you have any children?” I don’t know why, but I glance at her ring finger. It’s empty. There’s a pale mark that suggests she used to wear a ring.

  Her sharp intake of breath makes me look up. Our eyes meet, and I regret asking.

  “No.” Her tone turns suddenly cool. “No kids.” The smile returns to her lips. “But since this time is about you and your baby, let’s have a look to see how the little one is doing, shall we? Let’s have you lie down and free up your stomach area.”

  I nod and rise, feeling embarrassed for asking her something that’s none of my business. Looks like the culture of Faypine has rubbed off on me. No topic in this town is off limits. How in the world did I come this far without anyone, especially Doris Charleston, peeling away my layers?

  I unbutton my teal shirt—that belongs to Jared—and lie on my back on the reclining examination table.

  “As you probably already know, the gel will be a little cool,” Dr. Fern says, squirting too much of it onto my belly, then picking up the transducer to glide it on my abdomen. She turns the screen so I can see the baby, but instead, I turn my gaze to the painting of the woman on the promenade.

  “Do you want to know the sex? Or do you already?” Her voice sounds far away.

  “No, we want it to be a surprise.”

  “That’s lovely.” She continues to glide the device over my skin while studying the screen in a silence broken only by my baby’s heartbeat.

  “Do you hear that? Nice and strong.”

  I bite back tears of joy. Maybe this is really going to happen. Four weeks and I might actually be a mother. I’ve vowed to myself that I’ll do a much better job than my mother did with me.

  I’m relieved when she finally hands me some tissue to wipe myself off and assures me that everything looks great. The baby is nice and healthy.

  “You have absolutely nothing to worry about.” She returns to the desk while I remain on the examination table, cleaning up and still blinking away tears.

  “That’s a relief.” I’m relieved the stress of the past few days didn’t impact the baby. I close my eyes for a brief second and say a prayer of thanks. I haven’t gone to church since leaving Corlake because I felt too guilty to walk into the house of God. But I do sometimes pray in the hope that He will listen. I hope He is. I need Him so much right now.

  “I bet.” Dr. Fern types something on her computer. “Do you have any questions for me?”

  “Not at this point, no.”

  “Good. Don’t hesitate to call or drop by in case of any issues. Take care of yourself and our little one.” She hands me a photo from the ultrasound. I stuff it into my purse without looking at it..

  CHAPTER 32

  I drink a glass of water as Bruce Frary changes the locks on our front door. I’d planned on having them changed the morning after the break-in two nights ago, but Bruce owns the only locksmith company in town, and it was closed. He’d been the one serving this town since his father died six years ago, when Bruce was twenty-four.

  I’m so glad he could make it today. I’m tired of sleeping with one eye open. As I had suspected, someone had stolen the spare key I keep in my office drawer, which has made me suspicious of everyone I work with, even Ralph. I have no idea who to trust anymore.

 
; This morning, I considered moving into a hotel for the rest of the time that Jared is away. I soon realized it was a bad idea. It would only take one person to make up a story that my marriage is in trouble and the whole town would believe it.

  Bruce glances at me with narrowed eyes from time to time. I’m sure he’s curious to know why I’m changing the locks. But I don’t owe him or anyone else an explanation. Except for Jared, of course. My chest tightens at the thought of telling him. He’ll definitely ask questions, and I still haven’t figured out the perfect lie.

  “Great evening, isn’t it? Not too hot or anything.” Bruce dabs his large forehead with a dirty rag he pulled out of his back pocket. “Nice to have a cool breeze again after the heat of the last days.”

  “It is.” He’s right. This is the hottest July I’ve ever experienced in Faypine. “Thanks for doing this, Bruce.” I drain my glass.

  “It’s my job.” He throws me a crooked smile. “It’s good you’re changing the locks. Can’t be too safe these days.”

  I swallow hard. He’s clearly digging for information, but he’ll get nothing from me. Word travels too fast around here. “I just ... I lost a key, that’s all.” I glance down at my glass. “Can I get you something to drink, Bruce? I have apple juice, lemonade, and water. Or would you like a coffee instead?”

  Bruce’s grin lights up his face. “Do you happen to have a beer?”

  I shake my head. “Jared and I don’t drink.”

  “Then apple juice would be fantastic.” He roots inside his hard-plastic box for a tool.

  “I’ll be right back.” I go to the kitchen with the intention of getting him the drink I promised, but my thoughts distract me and carry me away from the present.

  “Mrs. Lester?” Bruce taps me on the shoulder.

  I jump and spin around. My wild eyes meet his. How long have I been standing by the window staring out at the ocean? How long has he been standing there?

  He raises his hands. “I just came to tell you I’m done. I apologize if I startled you.”

  “Sorry, I was far away.” I rub the back of my neck. “Your drink. I promised you a drink.” I open the fridge and pull out a pitcher of water.

  “Very far away indeed.” He chuckles, wiping his hands with the same handkerchief he had used to mop his brow earlier. I’m grateful when he takes a few steps away from me. The smells of motor oil and sweat coming from him are making me nauseous.

  It’s only when I hand him a glass of water that I remember he had asked for apple juice, but he drinks it without a word, eyeing me over the rim of the glass. When he hands me the glass back, his callused fingers brush mine, and I jump away as if scalded. I should stop being so jumpy.

  “I apologize.” He clears his throat. “I didn’t mean to—”

  “That’s fine.” I smile. “Thanks for your help with the locks. I’ll go get your money.”

  I move past him and go upstairs to get my purse, which I bring down with me. I open it in front of him and frown. It’s empty. Not a single bill or coin inside. I don’t understand. I had withdrawn quite a bit of money this morning before work. Where has it all gone?

  My stomach twists as I close it again and give Bruce an apologetics look. “Bruce, I’m so sorry. I thought ... I must have forgotten to withdraw money for you. Would you mind if I bring it to your shop tomorrow?”

  “Sure thing, Mrs. Lester. I trust you. Drop by any time.” He pulls out a piece of paper and pen from his back pocket and jots something down before handing it to me. “This is the amount.”

  “Thanks. I’m really sorry.”

  “Hey, don’t worry about it. I did jobs for you before, and I know you pay—unlike some people in this town.”

  Bruce walks out of my house, and I lock the doors with the new key, still feeling unsafe in my own home. I still feel ruffled, especially after discovering that the money in my purse had disappeared. I know someone took it. My privacy is being invaded. My life is going up in smoke and there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it.

  Standing in the hallway shifting through suspects inside my mind is driving me nuts. So, I go upstairs to call Jared.

  “How are you doing, babe?” His voice doesn’t soothe me as it often does. “You sound—”

  “I’m okay. Just tired.”

  “You shouldn’t push yourself too hard. Take a day off if you need it.”

  “I will.” I bury a hand in my hair. “By the way, I changed the locks today.”

  “Really? Why did you do that?”

  “I lost my spare key, the one I keep at the school. I feel safer with the locks changed.” I pause. “I heard some days ago, someone’s house was broken into.”

  “Jesus, on our street? Whose house?”

  “I’m not sure. I just overhead a conversation at the grocery store. I didn’t want to take any chances.” I chew the inside of my lip as I wait for his response. I don’t get an immediate one. Does he know I’m lying?

  “I agree. I’m glad you acted fast. I wish I didn’t have to travel so much. Leaving you alone for days on end is torture, especially now that you’re pregnant.”

  “You’ll be back home soon, honey.” I squeeze my eyes shut. “I just wanted to hear your voice. Get back to work. I didn’t want to disturb you.” I’m sure Jared will spend his days taking photos and his nights editing them to perfection.

  “You can never disturb me. I’ll try to call you again before you go to bed. I’ll be heading to bed soon as well. I love you both.”

  I place a hand on my stomach and give a bittersweet smile. “We love you more.”

  I hang up the phone and go in search of something to eat. Every step I take in my house, every room I walk into, my skin prickles. Even with the doors and windows locked, I still feel as though I’m being watched, as if somebody is keeping track of my every movement, my every breath.

  Several times I glance out the window and see nothing out of the ordinary, but just because I can’t see the danger doesn’t mean it’s not there. I wish I could open the windows to let cool air in, but that would be too risky.

  Terrified of being alone, I consider inviting Ruby over to eat dinner with me.

  Yesterday, I finally visited her, and it wasn’t too bad. It was nice, actually. I was surprised that she has a nice side to her. She offered me a piece of chocolate cake and lemonade. When I left, she gave me the leftover lemonade, which I had offered Bruce earlier. It’s nice to know she’s finally accepted us as neighbors, but I can’t just show up at her door when I please, even if she had invited me to go over again today.

  I can’t invite Ruby over. What if my tormenter shows up and hurts us both? I wouldn’t want to put an innocent person in danger. Instead of cooking, I eat a sandwich and a bowl of tomato soup.

  For the rest of the evening, I flick through TV channels, but I don’t find anything worth watching. As promised, Jared calls to say goodnight. After we hang up, I go to bed. Like the past few nights, I know I won’t be able to get much sleep.

  I push my hand under my pillow and sigh with relief when it comes into contact with the knife I keep there. I make a mental note to get rid of it before Jared comes home.

  I hate sleeping with a knife, especially since it reminds me of the way Dylan had died—stabbed to death. But I need to protect myself.

  On the one hand, I want my tormenter to show up. I want to know who hates me so much. I want to know if it’s my brother, but my gut warns me that if I meet that person, I could lose everything, including my life.

  But how long will it be until the devil comes out of the shadows?

  CHAPTER 33

  The doorbell rings. Jared is finally home. But what if it’s not him? The question pops in my mind when I’m almost at the bottom of the stairs on my way to open the door for my husband. I stop, the sound of my heartbeat thrashing in my ears.

  The doorbell rings again, but I don’t move.

  My cell phone also starts to ring from the bedroom. I’m about to go back to
answer it when I hear Jared’s voice come through the front door. My shoulders collapse with relief.

  I hurry to the door and peer into the peephole just to be sure.

  I draw in a breath and put on a smile. Hopefully, he won’t read the tension of the last days from my face.

  I open the door to find him standing there, his brow knitted, but it smooths immediately, and he gives me a smile I know is reserved only for me.

  “Did I wake you?”

  “No. You know I can’t sleep before ten.”

  He steps into the house, drops his suitcase to the floor, and closes the door. Then he gathers me into his arms. When he pulls back again, he gazes into my face. “It took you a while to come to the door, that’s all. I thought you weren’t home.”

  Avoiding his gaze, I lock the door. “First of all, I was in the bathroom. Secondly, I’m pregnant and not as fast as I used to be.”

  “Sorry, baby. I should be more patient.”

  He glances at the door. Reading his mind, I reach into the pocket of my bathrobe and pull out a key. “This is for you.” I’ve been carrying the spare key everywhere with me, paranoid someone would get their hands on it.

  “Perfect.” He pulls out his keys and removes the old key from the key ring. He replaces it with the new one. “Can I suggest something crazy?”

  “Sure.”

  “I’m exhausted, but I’d love to take you out to dinner.” He pauses. “You haven’t already eaten, have you?”

  “It’s nine. You need to rest after your busy trip.”

  “I’ll never be so tired I can’t take my wife to dinner.” He pulls me close. “Unless you’re tired, of course.”

  I shake my head. “Not that tired. Dinner would be nice. What do you feel like?”

  “Dan’s Grill?”

  “Yeah, sounds good. I’ll go get dressed.” I walk away, expecting him to follow me. But he remains downstairs.

  My chest tightens when I glance in the direction of the nursery. I’ve only been inside the nursery once after the break-in. I’d planned on putting the crib together again, but I couldn’t go through with it. The memories of that night kept rushing back in to taunt me. Yesterday, someone came over to replace the wallpaper with a new one, and I didn’t even go in to see how it looks. The baby is coming soon, and I have to pull myself together and pretend to be excited about preparing the room, otherwise Jared will know something is going on.