by Kenna Bardot
I nodded. "They wouldn't have increased her time in the viewing area for no reason." The Springen Express came into view, a huge, cavernous room that still took my breath away with all the yellow detailing. The Springen on duty nodded, gesturing us over to the path that would take us to the Western side of the Mountain. With a wave of her hand, we sprung to the central city of the West.
"So it begins," Ryle whispered.
"So it begins," I agreed. I doubted Mireyah had any clue what was coming. The Sylfes were always woefully uninformed when it came time for them to Ascend. Most thought they'd already proven themselves, and they had mostly, but their work still wasn't done.
But mostly, it was us who had to prove ourselves worthy. There was just one problem.
We'd never deserved her.
But that wouldn't stop us from claiming her for ourselves, anyway.
✽✽✽
Mireyah
We stood in the entryway to the main rooms, waiting for the doors to open and the bulk of the Sylfes to pass through so we could get to our Unveiling. Theo's hand took mine, grasping it briefly in solidarity. Though we were far from close, it felt like he cared just a little more about my state of mind following the moment he'd witnessed with Ashric. Like he finally understood just a little of why I was so weary of the Gods, why I hated them so much although I was one of the chosen few selected for the right of Sylfedom.
When the grand doors opened, we stayed at the back of the crowd, letting them pass through without issue. Colm eyed us briefly, and Theo released my hand to suck back a deep breath.
"You'll go first, Theo," Colm said, turning and striding for the door. I knew he would mingle briefly, before finally making his way to Caprice so that the two of them could announce Theo. All a grand event, a big production.
Like the Gods hadn't already seen us, viewed us behind the wall of glass. As if we were unique, and not color-coded just like all the others of our kind.
When Colm disappeared, my breath stuttered in my chest. I'd tried to avoid thinking about them, considering the fact that I might finally come face to face with them again. I could touch them, talk to them, but that they might have ruined that hung heavy over my head.
While I'd been so damned busy waiting, had they done the same?
It wasn't unheard of for Sylfes to engage in physical relationships with one another, especially before they were Unveiled. Many saw it as practice to hone their skills so that when they were presented to the Gods formally, they might make the best impression.
Practice makes perfect.
I'd never even considered it. Never thought to pursue one of the male Sylfes who might have been willing, no matter how gorgeous they might be.
For a moment, I regretted that decision. Maybe their infidelity would have stung less had we discussed it more thoroughly. If I'd known they wouldn't wait, but would come for me in the end, would I have been okay with it?
Could I have taken other men to my bed and allowed them to have other women, so long as it meant we were together when all was said and done?
I didn't think I could, regardless of what they'd wanted. Not given how jealous I'd felt at the prospect of them being with Annalee or the other Sylfe. I'd thought them to be mine, just like I'd been theirs. Wholly and completely theirs.
"You shouldn't worry about them," Theo reassured me, and I smiled up at him as my nose burned. "There will be plenty of others, Mireyah. It only takes one, and you still have the Majele to consider."
"For a little while, I let myself believe they were different. That they might see me as something more than a body to fuck. I hate being wrong." I grimaced, controlling the tears that threatened. They'd taken enough from me, and they wouldn't take those as well.
"We all do," Theo chuckled. "If they cannot see that you're different, that there's something special about you then that's their loss. You'll find someone who can love you the way you want and give you a family."
We walked forward when we saw Caprice walk over to the stage that stood next to the door that led out of the room and into the main space. We stood there, just out of sight, and waited. The bright lights from the skylights shone down on us, giving the room an airy feel even as the gravity of the situation fairly suffocated me.
"We are incredibly blessed to have two Sylfes to Unveil for Mingling for you today! Shall we start with our male?" Caprice's voice rang loud and clear through the gardens, and Theo stood a little straighter next to me.
Soft applause echoed through the doorway, most of the females far better at controlling their more enthusiastic replies to fresh meat as they hid it behind a veil of propriety and class. "Yes, Mr. Theo, would you join us, please?"
"Good luck," I whispered to his back as he strolled out the open door. There was no hesitation for him, no unease at being presented like an animal to the slaughter. His dark skin gleamed in the bright sunlight that shone down brightly from the skylights of the overhang that shielded half of the main garden space. Everything was light and airy, something that helped Sylfeshire look less like the whorehouse it was reputed to be.
I had a feeling that it was something that Colm Svadeni strode towards achieving, given how protective he was of his domain. It was really rather ironic coming from a Svadeni who had never taken a mate. Particularly given that I had never, not once, seen him engage in any form of relationship with the Sylfes. To anyone who watched him, his duty to Sylfeshire was paramount to him, of the utmost importance, and he wouldn't allow his own selfish desires to stain that purpose.
Caprice's quiet voice resonated through the space as she recited facts about Theo, how long he'd been a Sylfe, what his interests were. Like they gave a shit about any of that. Before long, he passed in front of the door and then I had a brief view of him as he made his way to the group of Goddesses waiting for him.
I wondered if he'd bed one on his first day, or if he would take the more routine method of playing hard to get. Seeing who had genuine interest, so he didn't miss making a first impression on as many Goddesses as possible. Something told me he was far more intelligent, more cunning that he liked to let on.
He'd mingle; he'd tease; and he'd see who wanted him. I was sure of it.
I admired the choice, given it was the one I would have made had I been willing or ready to consider a future with anyone at that moment. A good way to weed out the worst of the users and abusers to find the ones who had potential.
"Now that you've all met Theo, should we bring out our female?" Colm asked as he held his arms out to incite the excitement of the crowd.
He need not have done so, given the cheers from the Gods were more rowdy than the Goddesses had been, more enthusiastic and jovial. A few roars sounded through the space, making me flinch with the possibilities dancing in my head. I'd heard stories in the past of the more beautiful of Sylfes being accosted instantly the moment they stepped out during their Unveiling.
Practically a free-for-all, and so long as the Sylfe was willing, it was acceptable. Sylfeshire wasn't a stranger to an orgy, despite the way Colm worked to rid it of the whorehouse designation. Willing, consenting adults could do as they pleased within its walls.
"I must admit, I have grown fond of one of our more prickly of Sylfes. Mireyah, would you do us the honor please, my darling?" I flinched at the sound of my name, willing my feet to move.
They didn't.
They remained rooted to the spot, horrified about what may or may not come to pass once I'd walked through those doors.
What if they’d come?
Or worse, what if they hadn't?
With one last deep, strengthening breath, I finally put one foot in front of the other. The slit in my dress, sheer and light, went up to the highest part of my thigh, the pink so pale it was almost a white as it parted over my skin. It had a sweetheart neckline with one shoulder secured via a strap that sparkled with pink gems.
Only the best for my Unveiling. Now that I could Mingle, it was important that I only look my best
.
I wanted to retreat the moment I passed over the threshold, the brightness of the light shining directly into my eyes blinding me as my pulse sounded in my head. I thought I might pass out, that after everything I'd endured, being so on display might be my undoing.
I'd have rather faced the Challenges all over again, rather stared death in the face. I focused on Colm, on his reassuring smile as I made my way to the front of the room. When I reached him eventually, he paused just a moment to run the backs of his fingers over my cheek and tip my chin up, as if to tell me to hold my head high.
It was the reassurance I needed, the reminder of who I was. I didn't give a shit what the Gods thought of me, and they could go straight to the Unwanteds if they tried to make me feel like less. I was an equal, and I always would be equal, no matter if I Ascended or not. He turned me to face the group staring at me, placing his hands on my shoulders protectively. "Mireyah is our second youngest Sylfe."
Shocked faces stared back at me, because it was customary for a Sylfe to take longer before being deemed ready for Unveiling. "She came to us just five years past, after flipping Godsvail on its head and rising to Sylfe within her first year in service. All this after being Collected in her first eligible year for Collection. Were she still human, she would be a mere twenty-four years old, and is far younger than most of us can ever remember being." Colm chuckled, and I could feel his smile behind me. I had no idea how old he was, but given his place of power in Sylfeshire, I had to suspect he was ancient compared to me. "She enjoys making her opinions known, cursing the Gods to Hell, and has a deep appreciation for plants and life in general. She's also recently taken an interest in Old World Mythology thanks to a friend here in Sylfeshire."
Laughter sounded around the room, and I felt my lips tip in a smile. No doubt, the Gods thought he joked when he said I enjoyed cursing the Gods, but his open, easy acceptance of who I was felt like a balm to my frayed nerves. When I tipped my head up to retain my stoic expression, my eyes connected with a shock of white hair. Making his way to the front of the crowd, without a single concern for common decency and manners, Char seemed to shock everyone who got in his way with his muting ability. The others followed closely behind him until my vision filled with all five. Seeing them was a punch to the gut, even if I'd seen them through the glass before. There was nothing between us any longer, and I knew I would have to face the reality of what came next in our relationship.
"I hope you'll find her as endearing as I do," Colm said at my back, giving me a slight nudge to step forward and into the fray of Gods waiting. I did so hesitantly, choosing to make my way to the God who had on a thrilled smile and stood right at the very front. As much as it might have seemed counterintuitive, I needed a moment to recompose myself. To gather my wits if I was to deal with them.
"That was quite the introduction," the God said, bowing his head slightly in greeting.
"Sir Colm loves his dramatics," I breathed out with a smile, choosing to proceed with kindness until each one gave me a reason to presume they had ulterior motives for me. I had no idea what to expect, so I was rather on edge.
"My name is-"
"Doesn't matter, Springen," Shep's voice growled out possessively, grasping my arm in his hand and drawing me away to where the others watched with interest.
"I'm so sorry," I mouthed to the God who stared at Shep as if he'd lost his mind, and with the way his body vibrated with fury, I suspected it wasn't too far from the truth.
Hollis was the first to step up in front of me, smiling at me in a way that made my heart clench. "You’re stunning" he sighed, touching my cheek delicately. "You were always beautiful, but somehow you've gotten even more beautiful. I didn't think it possible." I smiled at him in appreciation, not trusting my words. I wanted to tell him I cared, that it pleased me to know they still found me desirable. But there was a taint to everything.
"You look good too," I said finally, smiling at him. While going from Descendant to God wasn’t as big a transformation physically like humans had as they climbed the ranks, there was something older and stronger in his pretty face. More of a man, even though he had been when I'd known him too. He'd grown into his power, and no matter what happened going forward, I was happy that they’d achieved that.
Ryle was the next to fill my vision, stepping in and grabbing me around the neck to tug me into his body tightly. His lips pressed to my forehead, inhaling deeply. I’d have been touched by how deeply he inhaled, how much he must have missed my scent but it was so different from when I had been a human. Because it wasn’t really me, was it? Just the manufactured version of me becoming a Sylfe created.
Tate and Char stepped forward to hug me between them, leaving me pressed against each of them until I squirmed out of their grip and stepped back. The Gods all around and watching eyed us with open curiosity, and I couldn't take it.
I couldn't handle them acting like they had any right to touch me. To claim me. Not when anxiety rolled in my gut, like I'd swallowed poison that had lodged itself at the back of my throat when I’d learned they’d been with that Sylfe.
My five Gods, so perfect and beautiful and mine. Or so I desperately wanted them to be.
But I couldn't shake the image of what they might have done from my vision. I couldn't seem to find the words to tell them what was wrong with me, not with the audience we'd attracted watching us so intently.
Tate's brow furrowed, and I knew without a doubt that he felt every bit of the tumultuous emotions running through me. The fact that he didn't understand what they meant, the confusion openly written on his face, was a moment of comfort for me.
If it were true, he'd know.
Right?
"Mireyah?" he asked, taking a step towards me and holding out a hand. I didn't want to know what my face looked like. Didn't want to think about how tormented I must seem for him to treat me like a wounded animal. The last time he'd done so, they'd betrayed every confidence there was to betray and taken something from me that I would never be able to get back. That I hadn't been ready or willing to give.
My anxiety reached a new pitch as I thought about that last betrayal, examining each of their features as they studied me.
They'd hurt me once, and I'd forgiven it.
So what was to stop them from doing it again?
But with their eyes on me along with the eyes of the Gods who came to meet me at my Unveiling, I couldn't allow myself to break. I wouldn't let them break me. Not when I was halfway to my goal. Halfway to being able to make a difference for humans who wanted more out of life.
"I'm sorry. This is just a lot, you know?" I smiled sheepishly. "It's been years. I think-I think I just need a minute." I stepped back even as I strained to ask, wanting to outright ask if they'd been with other women in our time apart, but it wasn't the time.
I'd told myself that if I was in Theo's position, I'd have worked the room. Gotten to know all the prospects for marriage and studied them all. Picked out the ones most likely to fall under my spell.
But I was in Theo's position. Just because I had a history with them, didn't mean they would be my best option. So I steeled my spine and turned to smile brightly at the other Gods watching us. "Excuse me." I said, turning my back on the men I'd loved enough to forgive the unthinkable.
I wouldn't break.
Not for any God.
Chapter 7
Mireyah
They had erected a wall of ice between the main garden space where the fountain was, where Theo and I's Unveiling occurred, and one of the lounge spaces where the rest of the Sylfes observed us. On a Sylfe’s first visitation day, they didn’t work the room with other Sylfes. It was a Sylfic tradition.
Some Gods who had already decided they weren't interested in either Theo or I loitered about with them, but mostly the Unveiling took precedence over all else. Lysandra and Astraea stood at the front of the ice, Lysandra with her hands nearly touching the wall as she watched me intently.
I made m
y way to them, even knowing they wouldn't be able to speak to me. My dress twirled around my legs as I went, and I ignored the feeling of eyes on my flesh even as I quickened my pace. My lungs refused to breathe. Air defying me as I seemed to panic inside my skin, but outside I knew I was as composed as ever.
There was no alternative.
I just needed to reach Lysandra and Astraea. I needed to take comfort in the friends who had been my rocks for five years. While I hadn't had the men to lean on, I'd had them.
There was something so uniquely beautiful about the bonds of friendship with other women, whether we differed in massive ways like Astraea and I, or were too similar like myself and Lysandra. I knew, without a doubt, that I could always count on them, at least until the circumstances of our lives forced us to separate. But if we somehow ended up in the same place, or even if we didn't, that bond would last forever.
Just like Serenity. I would never forget the bond I'd formed with my friend back home, and she was one of the very things that drove me forward. Step after step, until I reached the ice and just pressed my forehead to it. The cold was a comfort, my friends on the other side another, and in them I saw all the loved ones I'd left behind. The ones the Gods had forced me to abandon.
Astraea reached out a hand against the ice, and I knew that she worried when her face crumpled into a frown. Then her visage changed, and she smiled at me in support, and it made me nod in return.
I finally drew in one shaky breath after another until I felt composed enough to turn and face the Gods like my little interlude had never happened. I charmed my way through the room, interacting with one God after another politely.
I never crossed into that flirtatious territory, never so much as even desired to. Given the way Colm watched me, I knew he waited to see if anyone piqued my interest, but even as I spoke with the others, my mind remained with the five males who watched me. I could feel their eyes, feel their rage at having been abandoned in favor of socializing with the other Gods.