The Harbinger

by Pat Adams-Wright

  “Ellie! Oh. Lord, what time is it? I have to sort Leah out.”

  Ellie shook her head and pointed back to the settee. “She’s fine. She’s fed and watered. You stay right there a minute. You’re a bit wobbly on your pins at the moment. ”

  A few minutes later, Ellie bowled in from the kitchen, carrying a small glass of milk and an eighth portion of stand pie. She placed both in front of Holly.

  “Now eat those to get your blood sugar raised, and I’ll call you in a few minutes. No ifs or buts. Just do as you’re told for once.” Ellie noticed how strong her own voice sounded. She was impressed.

  Ellie and Leah stood by the steamy bathroom door. They grinned at each other after a job well done and gave a quick high-five. The room was dotted with nightlight candles, which gave a beautiful warm glow to the darkness. The air scented with the smell of orchids was heady in its perfume. The top of the water had filled with bubbles from the bath crème, each one looking as though it was dancing in the artificial light.

  “Well done, Leah, for finding everything we needed. Now, I’ll give your mum a shout. You stay here, and then you’ll be able to see if she likes what we’ve done.”

  Ellie looked at the small stool at the side of the bath. Leah had picked out a pair of pink pyjamas for her mum to wear and put her dressing gown underneath. Perfect.

  Holly rushed upstairs after Ellie’s call, in a hurry to see what was going on. Outside the bathroom door, Leah waited with a smile. She pointed into the bathroom, and Holly looked puzzled.

  After she saw the room, Holly’s hand went to her mouth. “I don’t believe it,” she muttered in her surprise. “It’s absolutely… incredible!” Holly’s eyes glistened, reflecting her emotions. She turned and pulled her daughter to her. “Thank you so much, angel. It’s perfect.”

  She kissed her daughter’s cheek. Leah turned quickly afterwards and pointed at Ellie.

  “Oh,” said Holly, with a grin on her face. “Are you trying to tell me you had help?” Leah nodded in response. “Does Ellie deserve a hug too?” she asked her daughter in an enquiring way.

  Leah nodded again, this time more forcefully.

  “Okay, then.” Holly stepped forward and enfolded Ellie into an embrace. She whispered softly in Ellie’s ear. “Thank you for thinking of me.” She then kissed Ellie delicately on her cheek.

  The feeling knocked Ellie sideways. In that fleeting moment, there was some kind of deep connection between the two women. Ellie felt it, and by the look in Holly’s eyes, she had too. The women’s eyes locked on to one another for what felt like an age. The sound emanating from Leah’s throat brought them both back to the present. She was pointing at the bath.

  “Yes, well,” said Holly struggling for words. “I better see if my body is up to an extended soak. The last time was before you were born!” she said, ruffling the top of her daughter’s head. “Thank you both, so much.”

  Ellie cleared her throat of the impending emotional outburst. “Come on, Leah. Let’s leave your mum to her soak. Our work isn’t finished.”

  Leah balled her fists and covered her smiling lips with them.

  Ellie did the same, thoroughly enjoying the game in which she’d engaged Leah. “Holly, you have an hour and a half, and then it’s onto the next part of your surprise. Enjoy yourself.”

  Ellie smiled at Holly who nodded in agreement. “I can’t wait,” she replied eagerly.”

  “Well, you have to wait at least an hour and a half,” replied Ellie, joined in her giggles by Leah. “See you later.”

  The Dauphinoise potatoes were in the oven cooking. Leah, under the tutelage of Ellie, had made the dish. She’d impressed Ellie by the way she worked from her instructions, taking in the information, digesting it, and then following it to the letter. Not once did her concentration stray. Ellie was convinced this was because she wanted to impress her mum. She’d expected Leah to baulk at having to grate the garlic, but she didn’t, just concentrated furiously at the task at hand. Ellie could feel herself warming even more to the child, something she couldn’t have imagined not long ago. She’d had no room in her heart for anyone other than Alex.

  To her own shame, Ellie went through a stage of resentment, especially when her mother insisted on sharing her friend’s antics with their children and grandchildren. What had she done so bad that she deserved deprivation of her darling son for the rest of her life? What had other people done that they could have what she so desperately needed? Sometimes missing him felt so incredibly intense, it was like a never-ending ache deep in her soul. The stage had passed quickly though. Finally, Ellie realised she wouldn’t have wished how she felt… on anybody.

  For now, she had the company of Leah. She wondered how easy it was to get along with her. Gone was the frightened, injured girl rescued from the hoard of bullies. Now she was a confident twelve-year-old, who was genuinely a help to Ellie, and who under normal circumstances was articulate and caring. Although, according to her mother, Leah was different during the period of bullying—sullen and surly—there seemed to be no sign of it now.

  Ellie took time to glance at the clock, just as she was finishing off the preparation of the Cavolo Nero. Approaching five thirty—time to go about springing the second half of their surprise.

  “Okay, Leah. It’s nearly time,” said Ellie to the girl whose eyes were sparkling in anticipation. She dropped some snapped spaghetti into Leah’s soup. “I’m going to go get changed, then I’ll give your mum a knock to tell her it’s nearly time. If you could set the dining table, I’d be grateful. Don’t forget, there’s also pudding, and we’ll need wine glasses for your mum and me. Actually, make it three wine glasses.”

  Leah’s face lit up with a bright smile.

  Ellie laughed. “Don’t get excited, young lady. One is for your fruit drink,” she said. Then in a secretive fashion behind her hand, she said, “But it will look like red wine. That will shock your mum.”

  Leah pulled her bottom lip over the top one, trying to feign disappointment—but her eyes twinkled and shone. She tried a garbled laugh.

  This time, Ellie laughed louder than before. “Go on, young lady. Away with you!” she said, shooing Leah towards the dining room on her way to the guest bedroom to change her clothes.

  Ellie stood in front of the full-length mirror inset into the wardrobe door. She chuckled to herself. What would people say if they could see her admiring herself wearing a nightshirt! She’d picked it up in the supermarket and decided on it because it added… fun. She wanted to bring a little sunshine into all their lives, and she hoped this would do it. The front featured Spiderman in all his glory, webs dotted here, there and everywhere, including a large one taking up the whole of the back. It was a far cry from Ellie’s pink pyjamas. After placing the new red slippers on her feet, so they would match the nightshirt, she gave herself a quick spritz of perfume and then made her way to the bathroom door. She rapped hard, just in case Holly had fallen asleep.

  “Just drying off now,” came the reply, “but I have to warn you, I do resemble a prune.”

  Ellie tried to keep the laughter from her voice. “Neither Leah nor I are bothered by what you look like. Just put your pyjamas on, and come down. We’re in the dining room.”

  Back in the kitchen, Ellie finished off the vegetables and checked on Leah’s soup in case it needed any water. It didn’t, and the aroma when she lifted the lid smelt divine. She put the steaks on the griddle, turning them after the first four minutes. She heard movement upstairs, so she filled a small jug with Ribena cordial and took it through to the dining room, where she found Leah reading.

  “Your mum’s about to come down,” she said as she placed the jug of Ribena on the table in front of where Leah was sitting. “Everything done?”

  Leah nodded her head excitedly.

  “Great! I’m just finishing the steaks now. I promise, when you’re feeling up to it, we’ll do the same thing with something you like to eat. Perhaps have a pizza party with all the tri
mmings.”

  A creak on the stairs sounded just as Leah put both her thumbs in the air.

  “Your mum’s on the way down, so I’ll go finish up.”

  As soon as Ellie was back in the kitchen, she heard Holly’s exclamations from the dining room.

  “Oh, sweetheart! How wonderful! Thank you so much for giving me this surprise. It’s lovely that you’re thinking of me.” There was a short pause before Holly spoke again. “Yes, I won’t forget to thank Ellie, too.”

  Ellie walked through to the dining room bearing Holly’s meal and the bottle of red wine that had been breathing for the last hour. Holly’s mouth dropped open as Ellie placed the meal before her.

  “Good heavens!” she said in surprise. “I never expected anything as grand as this. Thank you, Ellie. It smells wonderful.”

  Ellie and Leah smiled at each other, knowing Holly’s surprise and appreciation was genuine.

  “Well, the glorious smell would be down to your wonderful daughter’s effort. She made the Dauphinoise herself.”

  Holly looked at the creamy potatoes on her plate, lightly golden on the top. She looked at her daughter with wonder. “I just can’t believe you did this… both of you.” She swallowed the last of her words, wiping away a tear with the arm of her dressing gown.

  More of a distraction for Holly, Ellie spoke as she poured Holly a glass of red wine and Leah some Ribena, “Right, I’ll get Leah and myself sorted out now. Won’t be a sec.”

  A few seconds later, she was back with her own meal and Leah’s soup.

  “And what would my darling daughter be having for her meal?” asked Holly, trying to look over the side of the bowl. “Whatever it is, it smells good,” she added, nodding towards her daughter.

  “Homemade chicken noodle soup with, I hope, soft bread.”

  When prompted, Leah reached across and selected a hunk of bread from the basket of mixed bread and rolls in the middle of the table. She tore at it until she had small pieces then dropped them, with great pomp, into the bowl of soup. Ellie and Holly held their breath as Leah tasted the first mouthful. Leah closing her eyes and a soft gurgled murmur of “Mmmm” from the back of her throat rewarded them. The two women smiled at each other, although they didn’t say another word before devouring the plates of food in front of them.

  Apple pie and ice cream followed. Holly noticed her daughter had managed to eat the pastry crust, too. She thought her daughter’s throat situation was improving, though never made a comment. She pushed her dish away and drank the remainder of the red wine left in the glass. She felt the warm glow it left on the way to her stomach, no hint of any acidic blast.

  “Well, girls, I have to say, that was a tremendous meal. Congratulations to the two cooks. Will you let me help with the clearing away?” Holly asked, not wanting to leave the mess until the morning.

  “No,” replied Ellie, “strictly not allowed. I’ll do it. You two go get comfortable on the couch.” Leah shook her head and pointed upstairs.

  “What’s wrong, sweetheart? Are you tired?” asked Holly. Leah nodded. “Off you go to bed then. I’ll call in later to see if you’re okay. Take some juice with you so you have something to drink.” Leah filled up the wine glass with the rest of the Ribena and waggled her fingers as she passed the two women.

  “Holly would you like some coffee?” asked Ellie, wanting to finish off the meal properly. She’d even remembered to buy chocolate mint creams.

  Holly nodded. “Yes, please. I’d love some. If I can move, I’ll go choose a Bond, shall I?”

  Ellie giggled. “Yeah, knock yourself out. Anything of your choosing, seeing as it’s your treat day.”

  With all the dishes cleared and the dishwasher set on its cycle, Ellie took the coffee and mints through on a tray. Holly produced a DVD.

  “I hope you don’t mind. Neutral territory. Roger Moore.”

  “I don’t mind a bit,” replied Ellie, pouring Holly’s coffee. She offered the mints from a plate.

  Holly’s eyes lit up as she slid the chocolate square from its loose-leaf wrapper. She took another and held it aloft in front of Ellie. “Are these your cookies? Is this your dark side? If the answer to both those questions is yes, then that’s my answer, too. I don’t care what the question is.”

  Ellie guffawed. She gazed at the woman lying prone on the couch and shook her head. “Put the DVD on, you nutcase.”

  “I can’t,” replied Holly with a smirk, “it won’t fit me.”

  11

  Ellie woke on Sunday morning, thinking of her son. How he would have enjoyed joining in the shenanigans of yesterday afternoon. What would she have given him to do? He would barely have reached the work counter, and he would have been much too young to use the cooking knives. Perhaps he could have had a try at setting the table. She would have shown him the proper place for everything. She would never have the chance now to teach him everything she thought he should learn to be an independent man in the future. A tear slid down her cheek and landed softly on the pillow.

  Although she felt sad at the things he would never get to see or do, her sadness didn’t seem as bottomless as it had in the past. It had seemed because her love for him was endless, so must be the despair. She repeated in her head what had happened that day. She carried the thoughts like a video recording in her head. It was on a loop accessed when she felt she could cope or to punish herself even further.

  She was in the park having picked up Alex at the school gates. His duffle coat flapped around him as he ran into her arms, his hair in disarray, as though he’d been in a rough and tumble with one of his friends. She remembered the argument they’d had in the morning before setting off to school. Because the sun was shining, he didn’t want to wear his coat. Ellie had been adamant because the morning was cool, so he went to school wearing his glum face.

  She welcomed him at the gate with open arms. He passed her a painting he’d done of a summer’s day, the cheap paper warping where the paint had touched it. The sun stood proudly in the corner, giving off lines of rays, and in front, out of a sea of green grass, came a single flower. She didn’t know for sure, but it looked distinctly like a daisy. Off to the right stood a red house. Not their house, but a solitary one with four windows, each with four panes of glass, and a solid looking front door. The chimney, sprouting from the roof, belched out a column of dark grey smoke. She wondered where his inspiration came from. It wasn’t anywhere local, that she could think of. On all their trips to the countryside, and there had been many, she couldn’t remember seeing anything like it, either. Perhaps it had sprung from his vivid imagination or from a book that he’d seen in school.

  “Thank you so much, my little treasure. I’ll put it on the fridge when we get home, shall I? To go with your others.”

  He seemed to ignore her question but asked, “Can we go to the park now?” as he propelled himself round a roadside tree at great speed, using it like a pole. He stopped and waited for her to answer. “Yes, of course,” she said, smiling benignly at him. “But remember, only a quick visit today because we promised Nanny we would go to her house for tea.”

  He squidged up his face, like only children can do, indicating his preference. Her mother came second, behind the park. “Okay,” Alex replied with no enthusiasm.

  “And what does that also mean?” she asked as he grabbed the side of her coat as they walked.

  He dropped his eyebrows to show he was thinking. “Er, I can only have a lolly because ice cream fills me up?” he asked, looking at Ellie to see if he had the right answer.

  “Correct!” she said with a smile, and then she watched him run into the park entrance.

  A slight tapping on the door disturbed the video loop. As she padded her way to the door, she wiped the drying tears from her eyes. Opening the door, she found Leah there. “Good morning, Leah,” she said, forcing a smile to her lips. “Is there something wrong?”

  Ellie was waiting for the hand signals. Leah shook her head. “There’s nothing wr
ong. I just wondered if I could talk today. My throat is feeling much better. My voice is a bit croaky, though.”

  Ellie was taken aback. She thought Leah’s voice would be gone a while longer, and Ellie certainly didn’t expect that, when Leah's voice returned, she would sound like Regan from The Exorcist when Regan was having one of her funny turns. Ellie swept away the thought.

  “Of course, you can talk if you want, as long as your throat’s not hurting.”

  “Not at all. I’m glad because it really hurt a lot,” Leah answered with a grimace, her face aglow.

  Ellie looked sad at the thought of the child suffering. “I bet it did, sweetheart. You really weren’t well at all. Would you like some breakfast?”

  “Yes, please,” answered Leah enthusiastically, her voice alternating between soprano and baritone. “Will you teach me to make scrambled eggs?”

  Ellie smiled at the pleading eyes. “Of course, I will. In fact, I’ll teach you how to make scrambled eggs… with a difference!”

  Down in the kitchen, Ellie assembled all the food and equipment they would need to make breakfast. She would stand over Leah and make sure she was safe, every step of the way.

  “Okay,” said Ellie using her teacher’s voice. She remembered that’s what Alex used to call it when she was giving him instructions. “First of all, you will need the small frying pan.”

  Leah lifted it and twisted it in the air like a demonstrator trying to sell one.

  “Add a little oil to the pan. Just a tiny drop…” Ellie watched as Leah carried out her instructions. “Now you can put that on the hob for the time being. Now take the bacon rashers and, using the scissors, cut into small pieces.” Ellie was amazed how Leah instinctively knew the size of pieces to cut, without being shown. “Now, turn on the ring, making sure there is nothing dangling in the way. Why don’t you take off your dressing gown for a while or push the sleeves up.”