by Kim Lawrence
Shoulders hunched, she gave a jerky little shrug. I was being stupid, I know that. It was just a dreamthe same one each time. She swallowed. About the baby, and I know its stupid because even you cant do much about dreams, but if Id known you were there I wouldnt have felt so afraid of falling asleep. I suppose I feel safe with you around.
Francesco sucked in a deep breath; the strong angles of his lean face seemed carved of stone as he stared at her.
Lost in his eyes, Erin hardly noticed that the silence between them had stretched into minutes.
When he did speak Francescos accent was perceptibly thicker than normal. You dont have to be afraid of falling asleep again because I will be there. With a slow smile that made her stomach flip, he leaned across and cupped her chin in his hand. And I will be there when you wake up, too.
Beneath the sweep of his lashes she could see the dark liquid glow of his eyes as they moved across her face. He was so close she could feel the warmth of his breath on her cheek. In her chest her heart started to thud slow and hard, banging as if it were making an escape attempt against her ribcage.
I would really like to kiss you, he said thickly.
The heat in his liquid eyes as they lingered on her mouth made her dizzy. She was drowning in a warm, languid lethargy that made her throat dry and her limbs heavy and that was drawing her thoughts dangerously towards the idea of dropping her defences completely and telling him how she really felt.
When his lips, warm and firm, touched her own a deep sigh that was almost relief shuddered through her body. Under the skilful pressure of his mouth her lips parted.
When Francesco lifted his head she gave a soft, throaty murmur of protest.
He ran a brown finger slowly along the soft curve of her cheek and closed his eyes before pressing a long, languid kiss on her parted lips. I love your mouth, he slurred.
And I love you, she thought, and felt the salty moisture leak out from under her sealed eyelids.
I think she said, trying to ease herself away from him even though every fibre in her body was reluctant to break the contact. I think we should
Of course.
The speed and apparent ease with which he disentangled himself on a physical and mental level astonished Erin, whose body was still humming with desire.
She felt the stirrings of resentment as he returned to his seat. He searched her face, the groove above his masterful nose deepening.
Whats wrong?
I was just wishing that I could turn it on and off the way you apparently can.
She saw a look of comprehension spread across his face. You did ask me to stop.
I knowI know Im being unreasonable, but you could have pretended it was difficult.
I wouldnt have been pretending.
But
I didnt think I had to spell out what you do to me, Erin, but I can if you like.
Erin swallowed as the liquid warmth in the pit of her stomach pooled hotly. Ill pass, she gritted huskily.
You never used to be so prissy. Why are you uncomfortable talking about sex? Your candour used to be quite a turn-on.
She maintained eye contact, but it took every ounce of self-control she had to do so. The tide of warm colour rising up her neck she could do nothing about.
Im fine talking about sex. Though from his previous observations clearly she had lost her edge when it came to doing it! Im just not obsessed with the subject like you.
He gave a grin that was sinfully attractive as he ran a hand along his jaw. I must shave before we land. You are adorable.
Hearing the raw, driven note in this disconnected addition made her study him more closely. She immediately saw that he was not nearly as composed as she had first supposed.
She watched the nerve that ticked away like a time bomb in his sexily hollow cheek and was glad that she wasnt the only one suffering.
Dio! he groaned, letting his head fall back and sighing. You always were the best sex ever.
It was remarkable how one slurred comment could totally obliterate the warm romantic glow. What had seemed unique and beautiful now felt crude and coarse.
I suppose , she reflected grimly, I ought to be grateful that he didnt pretend to feel something that he clearly didnt.
Erin lifted her chin and smiled. Its always gratifying to be told youre the best sex someone has ever had.
He lifted his head and surveyed her smiling face with bafflement.
Erin could see why he might be confused. Tell the average male that he was the best sex youd ever had and he would be preening himself, say the self-same thing to most women and they would be insulted, though it did kind of depend on the setting. There were some situations where she could imagine not finding such a comment tacky at all.
Have I done something wrong?
Not a thing.
Her gaze swivelled to his; the intense blue hit him just as strongly now as it had done the very first time he had seen her.
Francesco stretched his long legs out in front of him and crossed one foot over the other.
Erin was almost as surprised as Francesco appeared to be to hear herself say, I should have told you about the baby.
We dont need to talk about that now.
I need to. I knew I ought to have told you straight away, but I was kind of in shockand she closed her eyes I know you think I was a quitter to walk away from our marriage. I know you think that I took the easy way out, but it wasnt
Wasnt? He studied her downcast features with a frown. I dont understand what youre saying, Erin.
She shook her head, her luminous eyes starting to feel tired as she looked at him. No, she agreed, you dont see at all. Walking away wasnt easy , it was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life, she told him in a voice that shook with the strength of her feelings. It she swallowed and expelled a long shaky sigh it was painful, she explained with admirable understatement. If I had to do it again IdI simply dont think I could bear it.
Francescos expression was stunned as Erin absently dabbed the back of her hand to her cheek to blot a tear running down her face. You wont need to. We will make it work, he promised thickly.
She expelled a deep gusty sigh. We dont really have much choice, do we? she said, struggling to sound pragmatic.
Did you ever consider raising the baby alone?
The question drew a shaky laugh from her.
What, he asked, looking considerably taken aback by her response, is so funny?
I suppose the big worry for some women in my situation might have been whether the father would want to know, or if he would question the baby was his. That was never my problem. Dont you think, Francesco, that I havent always known that there was no way youd allow your childa Romanellito be brought up without his father?
But of course a child should be brought up with two parents within the safety of
Shaking her head, Erin cut across him. Any child would be a hell of a lot better brought up in a single-parent situation than in a home where the parents have a relationship based on lies and deceit. Believe me, I knowoh, God. She covered her mouth with both hands. My parents marriage has really messed me up, hasnt it?
Was it very bad?
Erin looked at him, gave a twisted little smile that just about broke his heart, and then with a faraway look in her eyes began to recount a story.
I was walking to school one day and I saw my father, which was strange because he had promised me the night before that he would bring me back a nice present from his trip to York. Anyway, there he was standing on the doorstep of a house not half a mile from ours kissing a blonde. Half my class saw him, tookids are not kind, she said with massive understatement.
Francesco growled a violent epithet in his own tongue.
How old were you?
About six or seven, I should think.
He shook his head, his face creased in a grimace of disgust. Dio ! Did you tell your mother?
I did. She got hysterical; my father was there. There was a lot of s
houting and he packed a bag and walked out. Mum turned to me and screamed, Look what youve done!
I thought it was my fault. I didnt realise until much later that she already knew. She always had known; she had chosen to turn a blind eye.
Francesco would have done anything in that moment to assuage the pain he saw in her eyes. He would also have liked to throttle the selfish couple who had used her like a bit-part player in the long-running soap that was their marriage.
He might have to tolerate them because he was married to their daughter, but he was determined that he would let them know his feelings on the subject. And let them know also that he would no longer tolerate the situation.
I suppose you could say that I was conditioned from an early age to expect men to cheat.
People make mistakes.
Puzzled by the odd intensity of his gaze, she nodded. Sure they do; its part of being human.
If they are genuinely sorry and regret that mistake, should they not be given a second chance?
The colour seeped from her face. Was that a confession? she asked.
I have nothing to confess to.
Shocked by the discovery that she believed him Erin expelled a long, shaky sigh.
I know. The relief of being freed from all those doubts was incredible. If Francesco ever cheated he would tell her. He just wasnt a sneak-around sort of guy.
What did you say?
I said that I believe you.
Francesco searched her face. What he saw there caused his shoulder to relax. Their eyes clung until finally he nodded.
Thank you, she said, heaving a sigh of relief. God, you must think Im a real head case.
When he finally spoke his voice was pitched seductively low and his accent was more strongly defined than usual. No, I dont think that. I think you are a perfect fit. I would call you a perfect fit.
Erin drew a shuddery breath as images conjured by his throaty words floated through her head of sweat-coated bodies intimately entwined. As the heat flooded through her body she closed her eyes and thought about him hard inside her, moving. She gritted her teeth and ejected the image forcibly from her mind.
When she opened her eyes he was still looking at her, his expression only marginally less seductive than his velvet-toned voice had beenif ever a man had been given a voice designed for making indecent suggestions it was Francesco, she reflected with an inward sigh.
She tried to inject a note of levity to lower the tension. How many times have you used that line?
You seem to find the truth difficult to cope with, Erin.
You wouldnt recognise the truth if it bit you, she snapped back crankily.
The only person who has ever bitten me is you, cara . His laugh deepened as the colour flew to her cheeks. You remember the occasion, too, I see.
Dear God, no wonder we never get to work through our issues. It always ends up with us trying to rip each others clothes off.
You say that as though it is a problem. And I have no issues.
She regarded him with frustration. That sort of attitude is why weDont you realise that our marriage has been based on a tissue of lies. Oh, I know lies of omission for the most part, but it amounts to the same thing.
First you dont tell me who you really are, then you dont even mention Rafe She saw Francesco stiffen at the mention of his brothers name.
I can see why you didnt tell me about him, she admitted. But when you marry someone you cant be selective about what you tell them and what you dont. I know that I have my own issues, but cant you see that knowing you have no problem lying to me when it suits you makes it hard for me to believe you when something happensand, wellI think Ive said enough.
And none of it, she suspected, had been very lucid, but she just hoped she had got her point across.
So, he said slowly, what you want off me is honesty and straight-talking?
What I want off you is love. Her eyes fell from his. It would be a start.
That, he conceded, does not seem an excessive request. He arched a brow. If I dont deliver on your demands?
She was about to say that they werent really demands when the plane dropped like a stone for what felt like several thousand feet, but had been, she later learned, less. Erin screamed, and grabbed the side of her chair.
Were going to die! Ill never get the chance to see my baby. Never get the chance to lie next to Francesco and feel the friction of his skin against my skin, smell the warm scent of his body and enjoy the touch of his lips on my skin, taste him
Erin, its fine, well be fine.
She opened her eyes and found that the plane had levelled off and during the interminable time that it had been bounced around like a cork in a stream, somehow, even though it seemed a physical impossibility, Francesco had moved around to her side of the table.
She presumed that the arm resembling a steel bar that was clamped across her was the reason she had not been thrown from her seat.
A voice, presumably the pilot, came over the loud-speaker system. Mr Romanelli, would you like to come up front? There could be a bit more of that.
What does he think you can do about it? she demanded indignantly.
An extra pair of hands on these occasions does not come amiss, Francesco said, strapping her into her seat and giving a thumbs-up sign to the shaken-looking female attendant who was strapping herself into the seat beside her. Erin would have thought that any pilot would have wanted to keep nonessential people clear of the cockpit on such occasions, but she kept this opinion to herself.
When he bent down to brush his lips against hers and promised that there was no need to worry, she saw the gleam of exhilaration in his eyes and realised that, far from being terrified, her husband was enjoying this.
It wasnt the best time in the world to learn you had married a madman, the sort of crazy who got a kick out of situations that would turn normal people into quivering lumps of jelly.
Her expression was indignant as she watched him stride away. I dont see why they want him. Its not as if hed be much use if the copilot falls out of the window or something.
Well, actually, said the girl beside her, he would. Hes licensed to fly this baby.
Francesco has a pilots licence?
She could see the girl thought it a bit odd that his wife wouldnt have this piece of information, but she was too polite to say so.
He flies himself occasionally.
Erin was spared the need to respond because they encountered some more turbulence. She never did ask Francesco if he had been in control while they endured the next ten minutes.
He finally joined her as they were circling the airport. He studied her face with concern.
You look shattered.
You dont. Obviously cheating death at twenty thousand feet was something that he found relaxing. Guess which one of us is the normal one?
He grinned and said she could nap on the drive out of the city.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
A ND Erin did just that. She slept most of the way from the airport and woke as they turned onto the last mile of track that led to the home she had once shared with Francesco.
She felt her excitement mount as she picked out familiar landmarks.
Youve resurfaced the road.
He nodded. I think youll find I have made quite a few changes.
The location hadnt changedit was still simply stunning. It enjoyed total privacy, and mouth-watering far-reaching views over the hills and forests of the estate and beyond.
Youve been doing some landscaping, she began, assuming the cleared section filled now with rows of olive tress were the changes he had referred to, when the house came into view and she knew shed been wrong.
She caught her breath.
No matter what your taste architecturally, Erin doubted anyone arriving here would not gasp.
Youve finished it!
He pulled up on the cobbled area in front of the building and nodded. He held out his hands palm up for her inspection. How do y
ou think I got these? he asked, revealing a set of workmanlike calluses, which she duly admired.
Head tilted back to get the full effect of the structure as she got out of the car, she shook her head in silent wonder as she walked towards the building.
Placing her hand palm flat against the ancient stone wall, which looked solid enough to withstand just about anything you threw at it including the odd earthquake, she turned back to Francesco.
This is incrediblewhen did it happen? Without waiting for his response, she stepped back to admire once more the stunning building.
The two wings of the house were now connected. The glass corridor linking them looked exactly as Francesco had described. A glass gable end stood where there had once been rubble.
I dont know what to say, Francesco. Its magnificent. Im breathless.
So am I. Youre beautiful.
Erin spun around, her eyes colliding with his. She shivered in response to the raw heat in his midnight eyes.
So you like what I have done?
She nodded, feeling suddenly and inexplicably shy. I love it. When did?
I was at something of a loose end when you left. I could not work.
You couldnt work?
Perhaps I should have said didnt want to work. A list of figures no longer provided me with the fulfilment it once had, Actually I was pretty much a wreck, he confessed wryly.
Looking at his lean and lithe body, it was hard to think of Francesco and wreck in the same sentence. The shock revelations continued to come thick and fast.
Once I sobered up
You got drunk ?
It was the bender to end all benders. I discovered that I am not an interesting drunk so I sobered up. He paused and angled an enquiring look at her face. I know you wanted honesty and openness, but is this too much information?
Erin laughed. Is that what this is about?
The laughter died from his face.
This is about being someone you believe will love and care for you and our baby for the rest of your life. You shared your thoughts and feelings with me. I am simply returning the compliment.