The Queen of Sheba

by Jill Eileen Smith

  I studied him, believing him, for he was incredibly convincing.

  “But,” he said, shattering my sudden trust in him, “I also have a confession.”

  I waited, holding his gaze. The scent of the garden flowers wrapped around us like warm perfume, and I felt bathed in the Creator’s love. Such beauty He had made for us. I basked in the kiss of the sun on my cheek, but at the same time I leaned closer, longing for Solomon to share his heart.

  “When I marry a woman, she joins my family. She is not free to return to her father. It is part of the agreement when we sign the treaty.”

  “A king’s wives are a show of his wealth.” It was a custom in other lands. But not in Sheba.

  “And a bit of his pride,” he admitted, his face flushing. “It would be like ripping me apart to let any of them leave or to turn my back on them. Once they are mine, they stay in my kingdom. Besides, for another man to claim one of my wives would be tantamount to treason.”

  “This is not new, Solomon. Every kingdom knows that a king’s wife becomes his property. She belongs to him.” I puzzled over why he chose to tell me something I already knew. “I don’t see how this helps my dilemma. I think it is best that I let God have my desires and return home to adopt a child of my people to raise as heir to the kingdom. But I do appreciate all you have taught me. In fact, I would like to ask you for a copy of the scroll of the law to take with me so that I can teach God’s laws to my people.”

  He stared at me for so long that I wondered if he had heard me.

  “If that is all right with you,” I added when he did not speak.

  He shook himself. “The scroll? Yes, of course.” He stood and paced in front of me, making me suddenly nervous. I wondered what I had said or done to bring about his agitation.

  “I fear you do not understand what I am saying to you, Nicaula.” He stopped in front of me and knelt.

  “No, I fear I do not.” My heart picked up its pace again at the intensity in his gaze.

  “I have never met someone like you, Nicaula. Every wife in my kingdom is good in her own way, but no one has your knowledge or understanding . . .”

  “Or holds a rank equal to yours.”

  He nodded. “You have read my thoughts.”

  I sensed a question in his eyes. “What are you asking me, Solomon?”

  “I am saying that I am willing to go against everything any king in any kingdom has done because I want to give you the thing you most desire.” I saw his Adam’s apple move as he swallowed. He took my hand again. “I want to marry you and give you a child.” He stared at me.

  “We’ve been over this. It’s not possible.”

  “It is if we sign an agreement that we will be man and wife, but then, once you conceive and the child is safely born, I will let you go back to your kingdom. You will rule from Sheba and I will remain in Jerusalem. We will be bound by a child of our love, nothing more. I will not seek your kingdom and you will not seek mine. But I would give you the honor of my name and the freedom to remain Queen of the South. And as you asked months ago, I will keep my ships from your lands, gain spices from you only through trade, and pay you a fair price for them.”

  I could not speak as I processed just how much he was offering me. Marriage. A child. A trade agreement. And the freedom to return to rule my kingdom without him?

  “How do I know you will keep this agreement? Let us say I took your offer and conceived. If I bear that child here, he or she would belong to Jerusalem, and I would not be guaranteed that I could return with him or her.”

  He looked at me. Was it respect or frustration in his gaze? “The documents we sign would not stop you. They would guarantee you safe passage home.”

  I wanted to believe him, for my heart had been drawn to him from the beginning, almost as much as I had been drawn to his God.

  “Why?” I said at last, for it was the only word I could pull from my jumbled mind.

  “Why would I do this?”

  I nodded, realizing all of a sudden how humble he looked kneeling before me, as if I was his monarch and he my subject. It made no sense.

  “I want you to know what it is like to be loved.” He said it as though love was something only he understood or could give. He leaned closer. “And I have come to realize that I love you, Nicaula. If you were a princess, I would seek an alliance with your father. But I can only come to you as my equal, a monarch like myself, and offer you myself. If you will have me.”

  He loved me? I found the concept intriguing and confusing, and I knew I could debate the meaning of love with him for weeks. But something in his manner stayed my words. And the flutter in my heart betrayed my own longings. I had respected Solomon from the moment I met him. I had looked on him with awe as I saw the way his God had blessed him. And in the secret part of me, I had imagined such a moment as this. I just did not expect it to actually take place.

  Is this how You answer prayer? Or am I dreaming?

  “I don’t know what to say,” I said at last. “I am honored and bewildered and not certain at all if this is wisdom or folly, even from the wisest man on earth.”

  He smiled at that and slowly stood. “But you will think on it?” He seemed anxious to be off, and I realized I needed to meet with Hadi. How the time had flown!

  “I will think on it.”

  He turned to walk me back toward my rooms. “I will make sure you receive the scroll.”

  9

  I watched Solomon leave the gardens after depositing me in the guest rooms I had occupied for almost three months. After another four-month camel ride, it would be nearly a year before I returned to my kingdom. I could not possibly accept Solomon’s suggestion. It would keep me away for at least another year, and traveling home with an infant could be risky.

  No. It would be best to return soon and do as I had planned from the start. The thought left me feeling morose. Why could I not have the thing I longed for most? But it was foolish to keep asking the impossible.

  A knock on my door pulled my attention from the window where Solomon had long since disappeared from sight. A servant ushered Hadi into the room, and I sat on the plush couch opposite him. I would miss all of this when I was forced to ride a camel home again. The very thought made me want to stay, but unrest would arise in my kingdom if I did not soon return.

  “My queen.” Hadi bowed low before sitting where I had pointed. “You wish to discuss the return trip?”

  I nodded. “Yes. With all of the gifts Solomon has provided, do we have enough camels to carry everything? Are they secured enough to be hidden from thieves? Is there a quicker way to make the journey?” The last came out unexpected, for I was already weary of the thought of travel.

  “King Solomon has provided extra camels to carry the gifts, my queen. He offered to send guards to return with us for added safety, but I think we can do well enough on our own. Unless, of course, you want me to accept his offer?” Hadi lifted a dark brow and tilted his chin. I knew my general could keep me safe without Solomon’s added guards. But Hadi would not refuse the king without my permission.

  “If you think we are safe alone, I will trust you to kindly refuse Solomon’s offer.” And should I refuse his offer to me? But that was another matter entirely. “How long do you think we can stay without jeopardizing my rule? I know we will have been gone nearly a year, but . . .” I paused. Dare I ask such a question without being willing to give Hadi a reason?

  He waited, watching me.

  “I wondered if it would hurt matters if we stayed longer.”

  “Than a year? That is, a year including our travel?” I knew he had heard me correctly, but his question showed that the idea startled him.

  “Yes. I am thinking of staying another month or two, perhaps three.” If I wed Solomon and conceived quickly, I could return once the first few months of the birth sickness had passed. I did not relish traveling with an unsettled stomach.

  “May I ask why?” He stroked his sparse beard, his look clea
rly confused. “We have seen Solomon’s lands and heard his wisdom. Is there a reason to stay of which I’m unaware?”

  I saw a hint of discouragement in his eyes, and I realized he missed his family. It was unfair to ask my guards and servants to stay away from home so long. Yet if I was to have a family of my own, was there any other way?

  “I am not ready to answer your question,” I said, meeting Hadi’s gaze. “I do not ask this frivolously, Hadi. If we stay, it will be to satisfy a personal desire and strengthen our kingdom.”

  He stared at me for the briefest moment, then studied the rug beneath his feet. He was dressed as he always was in his military garb and looked uncomfortable in such plush surroundings. He shifted his position, and I knew he wanted to press me for answers.

  “I will tell you this much,” I said, hoping I did not regret my words. I glanced about the room, making sure we were alone. “But I must have your absolute promise of silence, for my decision is not yet made.”

  He nodded and placed a hand over his heart. “You have my promise.” He too looked about us.

  “Solomon has asked to marry me, to give me a child for an heir, and to secure a trade agreement with us—a promise not to invade our lands for his gain but to purchase whatever he requires from us.” I released a breath, not realizing until that moment how hard the words would be to say to one of my people.

  Hadi’s eyes widened. “I see.” He said nothing more for a lengthy pause. “And you would have his guarantee that the child would rule our lands, that you would remain our sovereign?”

  I nodded, touched by his wisdom and concern for our people. “I would be breaking the customs we have set for monarchs,” I said, searching his face for some reaction.

  He did not look at me but studied something beyond me. “You would marry a man you could never see again?” He did look at me then, his intense gaze surprising me. “I do not know how hard it is to be in your place, my queen. But I know that I love my wife and I want to be with her often. If you do this, you give up any real chance at marital love.”

  “But our people want to keep me a virgin queen, Hadi. At least this way I could bear my own child.” But could I? What if I was barren and never conceived? I could end up living here for months, maybe years.

  “I cannot tell you what to do.” He clasped his hands, looking submissive.

  “But you can tell me if the people will accept me if I do this.” I wanted him to assure me, to give his approval.

  “There will be some who will accept it in time. There will be others who will feel betrayed. You risk many things if you accept the king’s offer.”

  “And I risk a life of loneliness if I don’t.”

  We stared at each other, saying nothing. At last I stood. “Say nothing of this to anyone,” I repeated. “I may decide it is folly. I may accept. I do not know.” Was that a pleading quality in my tone? How I wished Solomon’s God would give me wisdom in this!

  Hadi stood and stepped slightly closer but kept a respectable distance. “I will support whatever you decide to do, my queen. And I will do all in my power to convince the people to support you.”

  I looked at him, read the sincerity in his eyes. If he had been available and closer to my equal, I might have married him years ago. But I would not take him from a wife he loved.

  “Thank you, Hadi. Your devotion is more than I deserve.”

  “It is the least you deserve.”

  I did not agree, but I walked him to the door and thanked him again just the same.

  I slept fitfully that night and the next and the next. I did not see Solomon again during those three days, as I had chosen to stay in seclusion. Why oh why was life so hard? If it had been mine to choose, I would have had a different life. I would have chosen the family of my birth, met and married a commoner, worked, borne him children . . . The thoughts, the anguish, would not cease.

  Marriage to Solomon . . . Even his suggestion had to have taken great humility on his part, for to love me and let me go—the idea was completely unheard of and bordered on ridiculous. If he did such a thing, he could lose respect among his peers. His foreign wives could grow restless and demand things he did not wish to give. Some might send messages to their fathers to beg help in gaining more rights from Solomon, for none of them would have such privileges as I. Never mind that they did not hold the position I held. Marriage changed a person’s status. Everyone in every kingdom knew it.

  Why was I torturing myself with the impossible? But oh, to have a child—Solomon’s child! My mind whirled with thoughts of such pleasure.

  The dark of night had invaded the sky as I paced by candlelight. Fadia had come to me twice asking to help, worry in her expression. But she could help me no more than Hadi could. This was a decision I must make alone.

  I knelt beside the couch, my knees warmed by the soft wool rug, and buried my head against the couch cushions. Oh Adonai Elohim, God of Solomon, I am but a child in my knowledge of You. I do not have wisdom to refuse or accept Solomon’s request. I do not know whether this would please You or dishonor You. But I want to honor You. Please, give me wisdom as You once gave to Solomon.

  I lifted my head at the sound of a soft knock on my door. No one visited so late into the night, and my servants were abed. I rose slowly and walked to the door. A guard stood outside, but he had apparently allowed the knock. Curious, I pulled the latch and opened the door.

  “Solomon.” I felt suddenly weak at the sight of him. He looked as haggard as I.

  He stepped into the room and shut the door, not asking permission to enter. And then, in a moment I did not expect, he took me in his arms and bent his head low, his lips brushing mine. “Say yes,” he whispered against my ear. “I cannot bear for you to go without knowing . . . without granting your every wish.” His touch trailed from my ear to my jaw, then he leaned in again and kissed me until I nearly melted against him.

  “Solomon.” My words were breathy, my heart pounding like an unsteady drum. “I can’t.”

  “Yes, you can. You can marry me quietly and then leave if you must, but please, Nicaula, don’t say no. Let me show you my love.” He sifted his fingers through my unbound hair, and I suddenly realized that I was in my nightclothes. He should not be here. This was not the way he had said it would be. I could not just give myself to him here, now.

  I pushed against his chest, forcing him back a pace. “Solomon, please. Do not force your will on me. I have been thinking and praying of nothing else these three days. You must give me more time.”

  “There is a time for everything, Nicaula, and this is the time for love.”

  How convincing he sounded. How much I wanted to believe him. And suddenly I knew I could not deny him. Not when he stood there offering me everything I had ever longed for. He could give me the dignity of marriage and a child of love. And if I said no, might I lose that precious trade agreement my people expected? I could not have him bringing his ships into our ports and taking our spices without price. He had the power to do so, for we were not a warring people or as vast a kingdom.

  I stared at him, searching his dark eyes, trying to read truth and motive in his expression. But all I saw was a man’s desire for a woman, something I had witnessed but never experienced myself.

  “Yes,” I said after a lengthy pause. “I will marry you, and we will wait until I conceive a child, but then I must return to my people. Do you agree to my terms?”

  He laughed, a pleasing sound, his smile gentle. “A bargain I cannot deny you for the simple pleasure of having you.” He lifted a hand as if to pull me close, but I backed away.

  “Not until then.” Though I desperately wanted him to kiss me once more. “If you stay now, I will be tempted to do more than your God would find pleasing.”

  He sobered then, and I knew my words had hit their mark. He would not displease Adonai Elohim. “At week’s end then. We will plan a small ceremony at my palace, and you will stay with me until you conceive. Then you will wait three m
onths before you travel home.”

  I nodded. “We will have a scribe ready the agreement, including the trade agreement, before the ceremony.” If I was going to go against protocol, this would appease.

  “Exactly as I promised.” He smiled again. “Though not exactly, for I would keep you with me until I could bless the child on my knee.”

  I hadn’t thought of that, or of the other birthing customs in the law of his God that I was as yet unaware of. But I would put them into practice at home. For though I hated the thought of leaving him, I was Sheba’s queen first. And suddenly I realized I missed that role almost as much as I longed to marry Solomon.

  He left smiling, but I still doubted.

  10

  “You are going to marry King Solomon?” Fadia’s question the following morning, after another sleepless night, sounded most jarring in the light of early dawn. I yawned, knowing I had spoken the words—or mumbled them in my exhausted state—but struggling to understand the shock on my servant’s face.

  “I said so, didn’t I?” I rubbed a hand over my eyes. Had I truly agreed to this just last night? Memories of his knock, his kiss that still left me shaken, the desire in his eyes . . . How could I have refused him? But I had refused persuasive men for far lesser requests in times past. Was my desire for love so strong that I had no power to keep my head? This city was stealing my ability to be strong in my own right. I was awed by its beauty, awed by Solomon’s power.

  Perhaps too awed.

  I glanced toward the window that overlooked the gardens. This trip had afforded me one thing for which I would remain forever grateful—a sense of peace in coming to understand Solomon’s God. All my questions Solomon had answered. All of the things I had debated over the years—the role of our priests, the power of our deities, why we were here, who I was—seemed small now in comparison to the Creator I had come to see as real, the One I still longed to know about in greater depth.