His Risk

by Shelley Shepard Gray

  Alice was surprised to hear such criticism. “That sounds kind of harsh.”

  “It’s true, though,” John said quietly. “I’m even kind of embarrassed that until recently, I liked to think the same thing.”

  “And now?”

  “Now I’ve come to the conclusion that you’ve got a bit more spunk and fire than I ever gave you credit for.”

  “Spunk and fire, hmm?”

  “Okay. Maybe that ain’t the best way to describe ya. But you know what I mean.”

  “Is that why y’all came here? To tell me that?”

  “Not exactly,” Edward said.

  “Well, then . . . spit it out.”

  “We came to see how you’re feeling about Calvin.”

  “Oh. Well, I don’t know if it matters how I’m feeling. He left.”

  Looking pleased with himself, Edward said, “I know where he is. Bethy and me talked to Mark and discovered that he is in downtown Cincinnati this weekend, meeting with his boss in the DEA.”

  “I see.” Her heart sank. So she did wait too long to reach out to him.

  “What do you see?”

  “That he didn’t wait for me. I guess it’s over.”

  “Is that what you want?”

  “Nee,” she said.

  “What was that?”

  She was getting irritated with them now. “No, of course not, Edward. I want to see him again. I want to tell him that I really do believe in him, and believe in us.” Getting to her feet, she paced a bit. “I want to tell him that I don’t just think I love him, but I do love him.”

  “Is that all?” John asked.

  “Nee. I need to tell him that even though I’m just a preschool teacher, I’m tough, too. I might need some coaxing and a little bit of patience from time to time, but that isn’t terrible.”

  Edward grinned. “Sounds like you’ve got a lot to tell him, sister.”

  “I do. And I would tell him that, too, if I had his phone number.” Snapping her fingers, she said, “You know what? I’m going to go over to Mark and Waneta’s house and ask for Calvin’s cell phone number, and give him a call.”

  John whistled softly. “That sounds like a plan. Good for you.”

  “Why are you both grinning at me?”

  “Because we had a plan in mind, too,” Edward said. After smiling at John, he pulled out an envelope.

  “What’s this?” she asked, reaching for it.

  “It’s everything for your trip to Cincinnati. Your bus is going to leave in three hours.”

  She drew her hand back like the envelope was on fire. “What?”

  “Bethy and I talked with Mark and Waneta, then we asked Lora Beck to help us,” Edward said, looking pleased with himself.

  “Lora called a travel agent and helped arrange your bus trip and hotel room in a little inn in Cincinnati.” He grinned as he continued. “Next, Lora and Edward called Calvin and talked to him. He’s going to meet your bus tonight and take you to the hotel.”

  “Don’t you think this is all mighty heavy-handed?”

  John nodded. “It would have been, if you hadn’t just given that little speech of yours.”

  Feeling kind of proud of herself, she grinned at her brothers. “I was about to take matters into my own hands, wasn’t I?”

  “You were. So, what do you say?”

  Glancing back into her messy classroom, thinking of the lesson plans that weren’t written . . . about how all she was going to have time for was to throw some clothes in a bag and hurry to the bus station, she smiled. “I say we better get on our way.”

  And with that, she went into her classroom, grabbed her cloak and bonnet, pulled her purse out of her desk drawer, and left her schoolhouse. At the moment, nothing mattered but Calvin Fisher and the future that was almost in her grasp.

  Chapter 33

  Friday, March 16

  Do you need anything, sir?” the porter in the bus station’s lobby asked.

  For a second, Calvin was tempted to look around to see if the guy was talking to someone else. He still wasn’t used to being treated as someone easily approachable. “I’m good, thanks,” he finally replied.

  The porter nodded before approaching the next person.

  Checking the clock on the wall, Calvin guessed he had about another ten minutes to wait until Alice’s bus arrived. That was time enough to take a seat and allow himself to reflect on what had happened.

  Two days ago, he’d received a message from both Andrew and Mark. First, Andrew said that his boss wanted to meet with him in Cincinnati, which was both scary and exciting to hear.

  But it was Mark’s message that had made his insides knot up. Edward Yoder wanted to talk to him about his little sister.

  What was amazing was that both of the conversations had surpassed his expectations. He’d assumed Andrew and his boss, Mr. Perry, were going to say he was a free man . . . not offer him a job. He’d been humbled and honored.

  Hours later, he’d taken Edward’s call fully prepared to promise to leave Alice alone, at least for a while. But instead Edward had asked if Calvin loved her.

  Admitting that he did had been practically the easiest thing he’d ever had to do in his life.

  Now here he was, waiting for Alice to visit—with an ID card in his wallet saying that he was an employee of the Department of Homeland Security. Both his job and this upcoming visit went beyond his wildest dreams.

  He only hoped God would help him say the right words to Alice in the next couple of hours. Feeling that he could never pray too much, he quickly closed his eyes and did just that.

  The bus pulled into the station just as he finished.

  Standing up, he anxiously watched the passengers disembark. When Alice wasn’t one of the first ten people to appear, his palms started to sweat. Maybe she’d decided not to come after all. Or worse, maybe she’d gotten into some kind of trouble.

  What if someone had harmed her at the bus station?

  He pulled out his phone, checking for a missed message.

  “Calvin?”

  His head popped up. And there she was. Pretty, angelic Alice Yoder. Dressed in a pale-blue dress and kapp, with a black cloak. She stood out among the rest of the passengers like a beautiful lily.

  To cover up the wealth of emotions he was feeling, he grinned at her. “You made it.”

  But in her typical Alice way, she simply tilted her head to one side and fired back. “Did you think I wouldn’t?”

  “I was afraid you would change your mind.”

  She looked wary. “I almost did. I’ve never gone so far by myself before.”

  Some of the tension that had been building in his shoulders eased. She hadn’t said that she had second thoughts about him. Only about the trip. “Someone told me once that people underestimate preschool teachers.”

  She smiled. “Seems I need to listen to my own words.”

  “Maybe so. Let’s find your bag and get you out of here.”

  She walked by his side and pointed to the serviceable black roller bag. “It’s that one. I borrowed Edward’s suitcase.”

  After checking for her name, he pulled out the handle and guided her through the terminal. More than one person watched Alice intently. Calvin knew no one was being deliberately rude. It was more that they had never seen an Amish woman before.

  However, he still kept close to her side and didn’t hesitate to give anyone who stared at Alice too long a cold look. If she noticed, she didn’t let on.

  Instead, she walked quietly next to him, allowing him to rest a hand on her back while they walked through the parking lot. When he helped her inside his truck, she smiled at him and pulled on the seat belt while he took care of her suitcase and got in on his side.

  And then they were on their way. “I thought we could check you in at your hotel and make sure your room is okay. Then get you something to eat.”

  “I’m not too hungry because I ate on the bus.”

  “Oh.” Now what were they
going to do?

  Obviously misinterpreting his expression, she groaned. “Ack! That was rude, wasn’t it? Are you hungry, Calvin?”

  Right at that moment, he couldn’t eat a thing. “Actually, I’m not.”

  “Ah.”

  He couldn’t think of another thing to say as he navigated the dark city streets. Lora and her brothers had found Alice a small inn on the outskirts of the city. It was pretty and was near the river. It also had an electronic gate, so it was safe. He was so glad she was staying here instead of in one of the large hotels in the heart of the city.

  When they walked to her motel door, he said, “It’s late and you had a long bus ride. Would you rather we talk in the morning? If so, I would understand.”

  “I don’t want to do that.”

  “No?” His stomach dropped. Had she already decided that they didn’t have a future?

  “I could never sleep without talking with you first, Calvin. Maybe we could get some water or something and sit in one of the motel’s main rooms?”

  He exhaled. “Sure. Yeah. I mean, okay, we can do that.”

  Twenty minutes later, he was sitting in a back parlor with two cups of decaf coffee and a plate of warm chocolate chip cookies. When Alice appeared after checking out her room, she smiled at the sight of him.

  “What?”

  “Most of the time in Horse Cave, you always looked kind of scary to me. I was just thinking that if you had been sitting on a floral sofa, sipping kaffi and eating cookies, I might have thought differently about you.”

  He chuckled. “It wouldn’t have gone too well with the role I was playing.”

  She sobered. “Tell me about your job, Calvin.”

  Slowly, he told her about the offer Andrew and Mr. Perry had given him. It was mostly a desk job in Cincinnati. But it included training and schooling, even a tutor to help with the gaps in his education. He hadn’t been a good student in Amish school, and then had left home when he was so young.

  “That’s wonderful, Calvin. You must be pleased.”

  “I am. I . . . well, I never expected to have people like Andrew or Mr. Perry believe in me.”

  “Sometimes I wonder if you’ve ever expected anyone to believe in you.”

  She was right. That statement, and how close it was to his heart, caught him off guard. “I never felt good enough. Not by my parents, who didn’t really want me, or by Mark who had to raise me because our parents wouldn’t.” After glancing at her to make sure he hadn’t scared her off, he continued. “Later, after making so many bad decisions, I didn’t think I deserved anything.” Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to say it. “Most especially you.”

  “You deserve everything. We all do.”

  “I’ve started to realize that I’m a person of worth. But what I don’t know, Alice, is if you and I will have a chance.”

  “Because I told you that I didn’t know if I could trust you.”

  “Yes. And because I lied to you.”

  “Calvin, ever since that day at the lake, I’ve been having trouble sleeping. I’ve sat in bed at night, staring into the dark and thinking about everything that happened.”

  “I bet you have.”

  “It made me realize a lot of things about myself. Some of them are good, others . . . not so much.”

  “I see.” He forced himself to remain still and proper, even though his insides were shattered.

  Gathering herself, she continued. “For example, I realized that I’ve been something of a late bloomer. I was good at following directions, doing what I was supposed to do. Even if it meant I was lonely or felt out of step. I realized that I had been only living half a life.”

  She smiled. “Just hours before I first met you that night, I was praying in my empty classroom. I asked the Lord to help me. I . . . I was so sad thinking about having only taken care of my brothers’ houses and sometimes looking after—loving—other people’s children.” A blush crossed her features as she continued. “I told Jesus that I didn’t think it was right that I was twenty-two and had never even been kissed.”

  “So . . .” He was afraid to hope, but the waiting was driving him crazy.

  “So, I am going to keep praying to the Lord. Ask Him to believe in me, even if I choose a life with you one day.”

  “You would do that?”

  She nodded. “I’m here, aren’t I?” Smiling, she shrugged. “Calvin Fisher, I kind of think I already have.”

  He was overwhelmed and overcome. Beautiful, strong, adorable Alice Yoder was going to be his. He was going to be enough for her.

  He couldn’t think of a thing to say that could come anywhere close to the gift she had just given him.

  Except for one thing.

  He got to his feet, stood in front of her. Reached for her hands and pulled her up against him.

  Pressing her palms on his chest, she sputtered. “Calvin?”—and looked up at him, her blue eyes filled with longing, her lips slightly parted.

  Then that telltale spark that was all Alice entered her expression.

  And she knew what he was about to do.

  Feeling that this was the first, most perfect moment in his entire life, Calvin cradled a hand around her jaw, guided her even closer, and leaned down. And kissed her.

  She froze before relaxing against him. One of her hands reaching upward, curving around his neck. Silently asking for something more.

  Which he was more than happy to give.

  He kissed her again. Held her close to him. Attempted to convey the depth of his feelings as best he could.

  And when they at last parted, he finally spoke. “I love you, Alice Yoder. And now, no matter what happens in your future, you have officially been kissed.”

  Her eyes sparkled before she started giggling.

  The sound filled the room, filling his heart, filling his world. Making him realize that every risk he’d ever taken in his life had been worth this moment. He gave thanks, and then did the only thing he possibly could.

  Calvin gathered Alice into his arms and kissed her again.

  P.S. Insights, Interviews & More . . .*

  About the Author

  * * *

  Meet Shelley Shepard Gray

  About the Book

  * * *

  Letter from the Author

  Questions for Discussion

  Read on

  * * *

  A Sneak Peek at the Next Book in the Amish of Hart County Series

  About the Author

  Meet Shelley Shepard Gray

  IN MANY WAYS, my writing journey has been like my faith journey. I entered into both with a lot of hope and a bit of nervousness. You see, I didn’t get baptized until I was in my twenties and didn’t first get published until I was in my thirties. Some people might consider those events to have happened a little late in life. However, I feel certain that God knew each took place at exactly the right time for me.

  To be honest, these days I rarely stop to think about my life before I was a Christian or a writer. I simply wake up, drink my coffee, and try to get everything done that I can each day! I feel blessed to be a part of a large church family and a busy career. But, every so often, someone will ask why I write inspirational novels. Or why I write at all.

  Then I remember how it felt to knock on a minister’s office door and tell him that I wanted to be baptized. And how it felt the very first time I wrote “Chapter 1.” Both felt exhilarating and nerve-wracking.

  Perhaps you are a little bit like me. Maybe you, also, developed your faith a little after some of your friends or family. Maybe you, also, began a new job in a field that you didn’t go to school for. Maybe you started on a journey where you weren’t sure you were going to be a success or even fit in.

  Or maybe, like me, success wasn’t what you were hoping to attain. Maybe it was a matter of following a power bigger than yourself. If so, I’m glad I’m in good company. I’d love to know your story, too.

  Now, I have been a Christian f
or almost thirty years. I’ve been a published writer for about half that time. Both journeys have not always been easy. Both have been filled with ups and downs. Yet, both have given me much joy, too. I’d like to think that anything worth having takes some hard work. It takes some time to grow and mature, too.

  And because of that, I am comfortable with the fact that I’m still on my journey, one morning at a time.

  With blessings to you,

  Shelley Shepard Gray

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  About the Book

  Letter from the Author

  I’ve always needed to know the title of my Amish romances before I begin writing. I like incorporating the title into the theme of the book and having a number of characters’ story arcs revolve around that theme. Some of my favorite titles have been Grace, The Caregiver, and A Son’s Vow. Now it turns out that I’ve been pretty fond of His Risk, too.

  Are you a risk taker? My first inclination is to say I’m not! I like to set goals and enjoy a steady routine. But when I got to thinking about the choices I’ve made over the years, I realized that more than a few of them had been pretty risky for me in one way or another.

  For example, when I was seventeen, I went to college out in Colorado. I grew up in Houston and didn’t know a single person in Boulder. All I knew was that I was ready for a change. Those first days in my dorm were scary, indeed. But that time in my life also opened my eyes to a lot of new experiences—experiences I would never have had if I hadn’t chosen to go so far away from home.

  Maybe the biggest risk I’ve ever taken was starting on my writing journey. As I’ve shared before, I never considered myself qualified to be a writer—I was simply a girl who enjoyed reading a good book. Writing a book for someone else to read was a huge risk for me, and even scarier than moving to a new state to go to college!