The WWW Club

by Anita Notaro

  “Hope you don’t mind, it’s just I hate Chardonnay.” She sipped her water and he tried not to look relieved.

  “Oh, no, no problem, I’m not a fan myself.” He went for one of the most expensive French wines and hoped it’d come quick.

  Forty-two

  It was at least an hour later before he realized he was enjoying himself. She was a curious mix. One minute it was all bling bling and the next it was bedpans and incontinence pads. Still, he liked the idea of her in a nurse’s uniform, wouldn’t mind getting up close to that sometime.

  Toni was trying hard to be casual. And funny. And sexy but not too slutty. Men liked it when you talked dirty, she knew. The secret was not too much too soon. A lick of the lips here and there and a bit of fingering her jewelry near her cleavage worked and she touched him once or twice too, always in jest, of course. Actually, now that she’d had a chance to get to know him he was a much better catch than she’d imagined. He was very funny and she liked his self-deprecating manner. Even the glasses didn’t put her off, he had gorgeous eyes and she loved his smile. And best of all he was successful. She’d no idea his books sold all over the world until he laughingly told her about his first book tour of America, and how his driver had tried to sneak him in the back door of all the bookshops, in case he got mobbed. Jack had been afraid to tell him that his biggest worry was no one would turn up at the stores. He’d e-mailed everybody he knew in America, including a guy from Amazon.com whom he’d met only once—and who could have been a serial killer for all Jack knew—and a cab driver who’d taken him to the airport twice, all in a last-ditch attempt to try and rent a crowd. Toni quickly decided that he was educated too—had to be if he could write. And he had nice hands. As he laughed again at something she said Toni realized that this could possibly be a “should I give him a blow job tonight” moment. The girls would kill her if she did, not that she’d be discussing it with them; Maggie and Pam were still a bit protective of Ellie and seemed to regard Jack as out of bounds.

  Jack wondered later if he should order another bottle of wine, but she declined and he was happy—afraid he’d get drunk and dribble. Toni was afraid she’d get drunk and throw her leg over, so they settled for coffee and brandy and he told her all about his daughters. Normally, this was a real turn-off for Toni but now she found herself dreamily wondering if they’d call her Mummy or just Toni. It was all going swimmingly. Much later, and after a second round of brandies, they ordered a cab and Jack insisted he’d drop her home, despite her vaguely protesting that they should order two cabs because he lived so much closer.

  He asked the driver to wait and walked her right to the front door of her apartment.

  “Nice place.” He looked around at the ultra-modern décor. He’d always wanted to try apartment living, it seemed like fun.

  “Yes, I love it, come in for a sec and look at the view. I don’t want your cab driver to think you’ve absconded.”

  He followed her in and was impressed. It was all light and glass and pale wood, and the views across Dublin from the enormous roof garden were stunning.

  “Well, I’d better go.” He smiled at her. “I really enjoyed myself. It’s been too long.”

  “You should have let me pay. After all, I invited you, or at least Ellie did.”

  “My pleasure, you get the next one.” He thought he slipped that one in nicely.

  “I will, definitely.”

  “Great. I’ll call you.”

  “I’d like that.”

  “Good night, then.” He leaned over to kiss her on the cheek but as she came toward him his glasses or their noses or something got in the way and he ended up kissing her on the lips. He was secretly relieved because he wasn’t sure he’d know how it was done these days. He needn’t have worried, Toni was an expert. It was warm and inviting and promised much more. No tongues, Bill had warned. Actually, what he’d said was “sew your dick to your leg and glue your tongue to your teeth. Girls don’t like the feel of either on the first date.”

  “Good night, then,” he said again when they eventually broke apart, her first.

  “Good night, Jack,” she whispered and stayed where she was, perfectly silhouetted in the darkness while he let himself out.

  The taxi driver was definitely relieved to see him.

  Ellie was wide awake. It had been a funny night. The girls were over the moon that she was staying and even Rudi had seemed more interested in what was going on. They had a “midnight feast” at eight o’clock on the rug in front of the fire, with jelly snakes and raspberry and custard creams, Sam’s favorite. They made cocktails—in real glasses—from cranberry and orange juice, although Jess insisted on adding milk to hers, which was a bit off-putting. Ellie made popcorn and they watched Shrek 2—again. By ten thirty all three were in bed and Ellie was in her pajamas watching the end of The Late Late Show and trying to fish out bits of corn from between her teeth. At midnight she gave up on Jack returning to cozily tell her all about it, made cocoa and went to bed.

  She heard him come in at about one thirty. He was humming softly, a bad sign—for her anyway. His room was next to hers and she thought she heard him yawning and groaning with pleasure as he stretched out in bed. It added to her loneliness.

  Toni was delighted. It had all gone well and she really fancied him. She slapped on masses of anti-everything cream and curled up in bed to plan her next move.

  For Jack it had been like being a schoolboy behind the bike shed—packed with anticipation and promise. He was suddenly dying for sex and this was his big chance.

  Next morning chaos ruled. The girls descended on Nora and the baby at about seven. She came to rather quickly once Jess started walking a Barbie across her forehead. Sam had plucked a still-sleeping Rudi out of his cot and he was rubbing his eyes and looking like he might cry for the first time in weeks.

  “Here, give me the baby and climb in beside me.” She patted the bed and took Rudi in under the covers.

  “It’s OK, little fella.” She felt protective and the feeling surprised her. He’d been hard to love recently, she thought guiltily. She snuggled him in against her and caressed his head and he seemed to actively try to get closer to her, pushing his skinny arms against her ribs and causing her to wince. It was all too much too early. She yawned.

  “Can we watch a video, Nora?”

  “No, it’ll wake your dad. Hop in and we’ll tell stories.”

  “Dad snores. Nothing wakes him, even when we want to.”

  “I do not.” Jack strode in, knocking as an afterthought and tying his dressing gown as he walked. He smiled at the four of them, Rudi barely visible beneath the mound of females.

  “Girls, I thought we agreed that Nora would be allowed to sleep on? And how exactly did that mutt get in here?”

  “She was awake.” Jess got in fast.

  “And tell me how you discovered that?”

  “She opened her eye when I screamed cause Sam stood on my toe.”

  “That’d do it all right.”

  “I was only playing with my Barbie.”

  “On my head.” Ellie tickled her.

  Jack sat on the bed. “Cup of tea?”

  “Yes please.” She was conscious of her slept-in hair and morning breath.

  “Coming up.”

  “Now can we watch a video?”

  “Yes, go get your favorite and we’ll watch it under the covers.”

  Jess ran off and came back almost immediately, and by the time Jack returned they were all engrossed.

  “How was your night?” she asked as she sipped the strong tea. The girls had climbed out after a while to sit on the floor right up beside the small combi unit.

  “Great.” He ran his hands through his hair and looked enthusiastic. “She’s fun. We got on well, I think. Brilliant apartment she’s got.”

  So he’d been back at her place. Toni wasn’t playing it cool, obviously. It shouldn’t have hurt as much as it did.

  “Eh, I was just there f
or a minute when I dropped her off.”

  She tried not to look relieved. “Will you see her again?”

  Would he hell as like? “Probably.” He grinned. “Is that OK with you?”

  “Nothing to do with me.”

  “You’re frowning at me, Nora, and I don’t like it.” He got up, smiling. “How about pancakes for everyone with maple syrup?” he asked the troops.

  “Yeeeees,” two voices roared in unison, although they hadn’t obviously been listening.

  “All right, let’s get this day started. Downstairs in five minutes everyone. Rashers, come on, there’s a good boy.” No reaction so he was forced to haul the dog off Ellie’s legs, just as they were heading toward paralysis. He turned to give her an apologetic grin. “You can stay on for a bit. I’ll feed and dress them and call you in an hour if you like.”

  “Nah, I’m awake. I’ll be down in a minute. I think Rudi will snooze on, though. He fell asleep as soon as I took him into the bed.”

  “OK.” He disappeared and Ellie brushed her hair and teeth and they all trooped down for breakfast.

  Jack made fresh orange juice and a mound of pancakes and then took the girls upstairs to get washed and dressed for their outing, leaving Ellie to relax and flick through the papers, which had been delivered at about eight.

  She tidied up because it was what she always did in this kitchen and then made fresh coffee and enjoyed the silence.

  After skimming the headlines she turned eagerly to her favorite column. She hadn’t read it in months, partly because he’d been on hols and then because of all that had happened to her. She was smiling when Jack came back into the room.

  “What’s so funny?”

  “This, I love it, it’s my favorite every Saturday.” He glanced over her shoulder as he poured himself fresh coffee.

  “Ever read it?”

  “Sorry, Nora, that’s Jess crying. Back in a mo.”

  “Well, it should be compulsory for men. This guy really understands women. This week it’s about binge drinking,” she called after him. “It’s so funny.”

  He was back in a minute with Jess on his shoulders. “Anyway, here’s the plan.”

  “Hmmm?”

  “Listen up.” He tugged at the paper.

  “Stop it, I’m enjoying that.” She gave him what she hoped was an annoyed glance.

  “Well, hurry up, I want to talk to you.”

  “Who stole your rattle?” She finished reading and put the paper away.

  “NOW, what’s the plan?”

  “Well, I thought we’d go to Wicklow, have a big long walk on the beach and then go somewhere nice for lunch. There’s a new place opened and they really welcome kids. They have a play area with bean bags and sand and toys, right in the middle of the restaurant. Well actually, not quite in the middle, a bit off to one side so that it’s not deafening but you can still keep an eye on them. They show a different video every day too. Afterward we could take in a movie, or go to that new Fun Factory place, although that might be too much effort. Then, a stop-off for afternoon tea in Avoca on the way home. How does that sound?”

  “Great.”

  “And, Nora?”

  “What?”

  “You’re not working so let me look after them, OK?”

  “Cheers.”

  It was barely ten thirty by the time they all climbed into Jack’s Volvo estate, Rashers deliriously happy even though he was screened off in the boot. It was a perfect winter’s day, all crisp air and soft light and the beach was deserted. They put Rudi in his push chair but he looked agitated and it was impossible to push anyway, so Jack put him up on his shoulders and he smiled, so they had to take photos. The girls and the dog ran like caged animals, a tumbling mass of ribbons and dribbles. Jack whistled and sang. Ellie was amused to hear he had no talent in either direction.

  “You’re in good form.”

  “Yeah, I am. Come ‘ere.” He pulled her toward him and zipped up her jacket. “You’ll catch cold.” She liked his concern.

  “You know, Nora, I think I have been hiding away.” He took a deep breath. “Been licking my wounds for too long. Last night was fun. I felt alive. And do you know something?”

  “What?”

  “I think she liked me.” He seemed surprised.

  Forty-three

  Ellie put all thoughts of Jack and Toni out of her head and concentrated on having a good time. It was so much easier having two adults—she suddenly understood what single mothers meant. The kids acted up less for a start and it was nice having a man to do all the lugging and carrying that went with kids.

  Lunch was controlled mayhem. The restaurant was bright and spacious and the girls disappeared immediately and were soon swanning around with two reluctant playmates. After a while Rudi climbed down off her lap and crawled over to see what all the fuss was about. He pulled himself up to his feet when he reached the girls.

  “He hasn’t really tried to stand much at all.” Ellie was delighted. “Although he was starting to before Olga … died. And he never seems to want to be out of my sight unless he’s asleep.”

  “Poor little kid. He must be traumatized.” Jack had ordered Ellie a glass of wine and was drinking water himself because he was driving. She sipped the chilled white and relaxed.

  “Are you still OK about having him?” He was watching her closely, the way he did every now and then.

  She shrugged. ’Sometimes. It’s hard, though.”

  “Kids are hard work, and very trying most of the time,” he said, smiling over at Jess who was sitting on somebody’s lap. He made to get her but the woman waved him away. He sat back down. “Anyone who tells you different is lying.”

  Ellie nodded.

  “Will you keep him?”

  She’d been wondering that herself for a long time. “Yes,” she said, realizing she’d made a decision. It felt easier now that she’d said it out loud.

  “Well, lean on me as much as you like. I’m an old hand at it.” He sat back as huge plates full of gigantic prawns on skewers arrived, with wedges of lemon and a green salad.

  “Thanks. I really appreciate that.” She squeezed the lemon. “This looks great, I’m starving.” She had a prawn in her mouth before she realized she was dribbling. “Must be all that sea air,” she apologized.

  “I like it that you enjoy your food. Toni picked at hers last night, I noticed.” Ellie realized this Toni thing could get very tiresome. “She’s not fond of meat, she told me.”

  “Yeah, that’s why she purrs like a very sleek Cheshire cat and I oink and roll about like an overfed sow.” Ellie patted her middle.

  “Happy as a pig in …” He saw her face. “Only joking, I swear. I’ll go get the troops.” He stood up as real chicken pieces and homemade chips arrived, with freshly squeezed orange juice instead of fizz. “What are we like, eh?” he ruffled Ellie’s hair. “We’re like an old married couple.”

  I wish we were, she thought, and the idea scared her. “Don’t flatter yourself,” was what came out of her mouth full of prawns,as he disappeared to rescue the elderly couple who’d now been adopted by Jessie.

  “Mama.” The voice jolted her back to reality and she looked down to see Rudi sort of swinging toward her with one arm out and the other clutching the table.

  “He just spoke.” Jack was hot on his heels with the girls. “Did you hear that? And he’s definitely trying to walk.”

  She nodded, afraid to speak in case she cried and her nose ran.

  “You’re not his mama,” Sam said quickly.

  “I think I am now, darling.” Ellie picked Rudi up and held him close, then went to make a fuss of Sam in case she felt left out.

  “Does that mean you’ll be going away?” Sam asked as Nora settled her napkin.

  “No, love, don’t worry.”

  “Do you promise?”

  “I promise.” Ellie kissed the top of her head. Jack watched them.

  “Good,” he said, wiping a dribble of garlic butt
er off her chin.

  They managed the Fun Factory for about an hour, then everyone started to get tired. Hot chocolate with marshmallows and a cream tea in Avoca revived them all and Jack and the girls slipped away and bought a gorgeous piece of pottery for Ellie.

  “What’s this? It’s not my birthday for ages.”

  “It’s to say … thank you.” Sam handed her the package.

  “It’s cause we love you, Nora,” Jess said it like it was.

  “I love you both too,” Ellie looked at Jack. “Thank you.”

  “Pleasure. Now, what say we load up and hit the road? Poor old Rashers will need a wee soon.”

  “I need a wee now.” Jess hopped about.

  “I’ll bring her. Here, you hold Rudi, he’s unconscious.”

  “And he smells.” He wrinkled his nose.

  “I’ve changed him twice today and now I’ve run out of supplies.”

  “He’ll survive till we get home.” The way he said it made them seem like a proper family.

  It was almost seven thirty by the time they arrived back in Howth and everyone, adults included, was wrecked.

  “I’ll change him.” Jack lifted Rudi out of the baby seat.

  “Thanks.” Ellie was touched. “Right, girls, who’s for a bath?”

  “Nora, stop. You’re on a day off.”

  “I’m so tired now that another half-hour is not going to make any difference. Then I’d better head home.”

  “Why not stay? Your place will be freezing and the baby is knackered. He’ll be asleep in minutes. You could go in the morning. Mind you,” he grinned, “all I can promise is a takeaway and a cold beer. But I will light the fire and you can put your feet up. I’ll even get a DVD out.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Absolutely. So, you run the bath and I’ll hand this little guy in to you. He’s really ponging. Then I’ll organize the rest.” “OK, thanks.”

  Rudi had a great time splashing about. He roared laughing. Ellie realized he’d probably never had a proper bath. She didn’t have one and Olga had barely wiped his nose most of the time. The suds and ducks made him cackle and the girls loved having him. They played with him as if he were a real live toy. Jack wanted to join in with them, but he realized that might be pushing it just a bit too far with the children’s nanny.