Heart Waves

by Danielle Sibarium

  I tried to keep my mind focused on the fact his mother and brother were downstairs and could walk through the door at any moment. But his kisses kept pushing those thoughts away. Instead I’d return to his mouth and hands and their exploration of my skin.

  His lips were hot against mine. Softly, deftly, they traced a path across the length of my jaw, down my neck, waking nerve cells I never knew I had. His hands scorched the skin on my stomach just under my top.

  With every new sensation he helped me discover, a new surge of electricity coursed through my veins making me think I would spontaneously combust. I lost all restraint and reason. I allowed Reece to lift me off the dresser and carry me to the bed. My insides trembled with fear and delight as he gently lay me down and took his place next to me. He pulled back a moment, catching his breath, searching my eyes.

  His eyes were smoldering, his face serious. I thought of him the previous night, shirtless under the moon and wanted to see more of him, all of him.

  “Stop,” I put my hand against his chest and pushed half-heartedly away.

  “We have to stop, Reece.”

  He didn’t move.

  “I thought you liked it,” He whispered, and went right back to the business of making me forget everything including my name.

  I pressed my hand against him harder this time and shook my head, I didn’t like it. I loved it. “That’s the problem.”

  He looked confused and crushed his mouth against mine, his hands getting lost again in my hair.

  “Reece!”

  “Okay, okay,” he moved away slowly and let out a long, loud breath.

  I sat up and put some distance between us. He didn’t move or say anything. He just lay there, breathing heavy.

  “I’m sorry,” I said nervous to look at him. Afraid I’d upset him.

  I ran my hands through my hair, trying to slow my breathing and along with it my racing pulse. We got caught up in the moment. And what a wonderful moment it had been. If he hadn’t paused for that instant I wouldn’t have stopped him. I would have let him lead me down any road he chose.

  “Hey,” he moved next to me, his leg brushing against mine, his arm around my shoulder, “I get to be disappointed. But you have nothing to apologize for.” He kissed my forehead. “If anyone should be sorry it’s me.”

  “Are you?”

  His lips curled up, “Hell no.”

  I knew we were fine.

  Chapter 22

  The knock on the door startled me. I forgot the world existed outside Reece’s bedroom door. I forgot all about his family. I didn’t expect anyone to come looking for us, and hoped I didn’t wear guilt for what might have happened, what I wanted to happen, on my face.

  “Come in,” Reece called.

  The door creaked open. Aaron looked first to the bed expecting to find us there. He seemed confused and then disappointed to see us standing in front of the book shelves.

  Aaron shook his head, “You’re showing off your baseball trophies?” He asked, disappointment coloring his tone.

  “Don’t forget his medals and ribbons from swim team,” I goaded.

  Aaron approached us. He definitely didn’t get the memo on personal space. He stood closer to me than his brother. “If you ever get tired of this dinosaur, don’t forget you have options.”

  I laughed. Not out of cruelty, he just made everything seem light and fun. “Would one of those options be you?” I asked.

  “Not one of the options. The best option.”

  “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “Because you’re my brother I’m not going to kick your ass. But if I hear one more bone headed comment tonight, all bets are off.”

  Aaron held his hands up. “I’m only here to deliver a message. Mom wants you downstairs. Now!”

  I sucked in my breath, and looked to Reece horrified at the prospect of facing his mother again. This caused Aaron to look at me with greater scrutiny. I tried very hard to put on a poker face and hide my fear. His eyes darted from me to his brother.

  Aaron narrowed his eyes and shook his head with a smirk. “You had me going there. Looking at trophies.” He turned and headed out the door. “Can’t believe I fell for it.”

  I swallowed hard and looked to Reece for help. I did my best to communicate through my eyes or mental telepathy, anything that might work. I pleaded for him to find a way to get me out of the house without seeing his mother again.

  As if he received my message and understood my trepidation he took my hand and led the way. Not far behind Aaron, Reece leaned over and whispered, “Nothing happened.”

  “That didn’t feel like nothing,” I whispered back

  He chuckled. “Don’t look so guilty. We didn’t do anything wrong.”

  We didn’t do anything wrong. When you broke it down to its simplest form we kissed. Passionately. I could handle that. We were dating, and couples kissed. No big deal. Looking at the situation in that way eased the tension from my shoulders, from my clenched jaw and my overly paranoid imagination.

  Reece’s father met us as we turned from the foyer into the kitchen. A broad smile crossed his lips. “This must be Jenna.”

  I felt myself blush and I looked down to the floor for a second before pushing the fear aside and delving head first into the situation.

  “Hi,” I extended my hand, “It’s a pleasure to meet you Mr. Walton.”

  “I’ve heard so much about you.” Although his eyes were blue, I noticed a familiar twinkle in them. “Please, call me Howie.” His smile looked just as light and playful as Reece and Aaron’s.

  “When did you get home?” Reece asked his father.

  “About ten minutes ago. Hey Reece, I know it’s not your ideal situation, but we could really use some help at the firm . . .”

  Feeling like an intruder listening to their conversation, I thought of ways I might score points with his mother. “Is there anything I can do to help you, Diane?” I asked.

  “Please just sit and relax,” she motioned toward the table.

  I looked around stunned to find all evidence she cooked had been removed. No pots sat on the stove to be scrubbed, no bits of food needed to be put away. Nothing marred the surface of the granite counter top. Efficient, I thought. Dinners at my house always consisted of equal work cleaning up after the meal, as went into preparing it.

  I took a seat at the perfectly made the kitchen table, took the linen napkin out of my place setting and laid it over my lap. While waiting for the others to follow suit I readied myself for the onslaught of questions that were sure to follow.

  I thought about Reece’s incredible sense of humor and his kind, protective nature. And Aaron’s endearing personality. Their parents had to be pretty special to turn out two such exceptional boys.

  Aaron was quick to take the seat next to me. Diane noticed and ushered Howie and Reece over to their seats. She served everyone generous portions of steak, mashed potatoes, and asparagus. Once everyone had food on their plates the barrage of questions began.

  “So you live near Michael?” Diane asked while cutting her meat.

  I nodded, “Two houses away.”

  “That close,” Aaron smirked tongue in cheek, thinking thoughts I thanked my lucky stars he didn’t verbalize.

  “And how exactly did you meet?” His mother asked curiously.

  I glanced over at Reece, “We met at a party,” I answered.

  “Tell me, is that all those boys do?” His father asked with a raised eyebrow, yet one more mannerism of Reece’s.

  “Not at all,” I smiled.

  “What a waste,” Aaron interjected.

  “Have you declared a major yet?” Howie asked.

  I shook my head, “I don’t even know what schools I’m applying to.”

  His father’s brow creased, “Isn’t it a little late to be sending applications?”

  “Dad, I told you Jenna’s going into her senior year of high school.” Reece defended.

  “Oh, that’s right,�
� he pressed the palm of his hand against his forehead. “I forgot. Senior moment.” Howie explained, obviously relieved the girl his son has been spending his summer with wasn’t just lackadaisical about going to college.

  I shook my head. “It would help if I knew what I wanted to do when I grow up.” I teased. “At least then I could narrow down the selection. I guess you can say I haven’t found myself yet.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with that,” Diane began, “I mean you’re still so young.”

  The way she emphasized the word young had me wondering if she found that to be a pro or a con. She’s so young you shouldn’t get involved Reece, you know how fickle children could be. Or, she’s so young you can mold her into the perfect little housewife and mother.

  “I’m glad to see Jenna has enough sense to realize her options are endless.” Diane continued.

  Reece looked annoyed. I could see his eyes drifting, clouding over, and tuning everyone out. Like he’d heard it a million times already, and I wondered what had him so disinterested.

  “You might want to take a page out of her book, son. You never know when you might realize you’re not on the right path.” Howie added.

  Aaron leaned over and whispered. “They want him in a pre-law program so he could become a lawyer like Dad.”

  I waited to hear something from Reece, an explanation, an argument. He just continued to look off into space somewhere beyond his parents. Beyond his house. Beyond anything I could envision.

  It wasn’t until the conversation turned back to me, my likes, after school activities and organizations, that Reece rejoined the conversation. I could see the difference immediately. His eyes were again focused and captivating.

  After dinner Reece, Aaron, and I cleared the table. Aaron stood by the sink rinsing his dish off. I watched Reece put his arm around his brother’s shoulder and whisper something close to his ear. Aaron nodded, and Reece patted him on the back. I enjoyed watching them together. A strong bond connected them.

  “Want to go for a walk?” Reece asked.

  “I feel funny leaving your brother with the dishes.”

  “He doesn’t mind.”

  “Seriously,” Aaron added. “It’s fine. I’ll be done in a few minutes.”

  Reece led the way through the sliding doors in the family room out onto the brick patio. I took in the beautifully landscaped yard around the freeform pool. A large rock waterfall spilled into the water. A gentle breeze carried the slightest hint of chlorine as we passed.

  I looked on in awe as we walked by the fancy trees and flower beds surrounding the area. He continued back to a line of trees leading to a thicket, making the property seem endless. I felt like we were in some exotic garden a million miles from home.

  “Reece Walton, Esquire.” I joked. “You have to admit, it does have a nice ring.”

  Reece looked at me, his eyes blazing. “Don’t start.”

  “Relax. I’m just trying to figure out why it has you so bent of shape.”

  Reece didn’t answer. He continued walking into the folds of green with me close behind. He stopped as we came upon a small clearing, maybe six or seven feet wide. A large oak tree towered over us. I looked up to the sky and saw nothing but the umbrella of leaves above us.

  Reece sat on ground leaning back against the bark. I took a seat next to him. He still looked perturbed, his lips pressed together in a straight line.

  “It’s not me.” He said breathing hard, and angry, eyes straight ahead. “It’s not what I want. They just don’t get it.”

  “Have you told them? Point blank?”

  He nodded. “They just keep at it. Like I’m magically going to change my mind.”

  I noticed even discussing it outside with me he still seemed disconnected and agitated. “Have you considered it?”

  He shook his head and glared at me again. “No.”

  “Why not?” I wanted to understand. It began to dawn on me how little I knew of him, of what he felt, or of the things he wanted in life.

  “I don’t want to spend hours upon hours doing research. I don’t want to spend the next five years in the library with my head buried in a book. Not unless it’s a book I choose to read. And I don’t want to start my life buried deep in debt.”

  “Okay.” It certainly sounded like he thought it through.

  “And I won’t change my mind.” He stated firmly.

  “Hey.” I turned around so I could face him. “I’m on your side. Remember?” I lifted his hand and pressed his palm against my lips.

  Reece pulled me close to him. “I know. I’m sorry.”

  “It just seemed like you were lost for a minute there.”

  He closed his eyes and breathed regaining his composure. “This is my spot,” he looked up at the leaves of the tree we sat under. “My retreat. I just needed a minute. I’m fine now.”

  His happy place. I felt good that he wanted to share it with me. I thought back to the previous day and how important he felt it was to tell me he loved me. His resistance to telling me what happened with Becca. It all made sense now.

  I had a flashback to our first date when he said the hard part would be talking honestly. I thought he meant me talking honestly. Only now did I begin to understand how incredibly difficult he found opening up and sharing his feelings.

  “When I was a boy I used to think it was magic here. Maybe because no matter how hard it rained, the ground under this tree never got wet. Whenever I really wanted something, I sat here and made a wish.”

  “Oh yeah?” I leaned close, our lips almost touching. “What is it you’re wishing for now?” I asked.

  He stared into my eyes, hypnotizing me. “I’m wishing you’ll want to spend the rest of your life with me.”

  A diversion at best. His way of ending the discussion. But I didn’t push. He’d tell me when he felt ready. “That’s a real waste of a wish,” I answered.

  I could see from the uncertainty in his eyes the situation with his parents really had him out of sorts.

  “I already do.”

  * * *

  Reece pulled a Swiss Army Knife from his pocket and carved our initials in the bark of his magic tree before we went back into the house. I watched in silence as he traced his fingers over the now bare bark, as if he were covering it with some invisible sealant.

  Reece took me by the hand and led me back to the house. Once inside he walked over to the couch where Aaron sat playing Angry Birds on his phone, pulled out his wallet and handed his brother a ten dollar bill.

  “For the dishes?” I asked.

  “You didn’t really think he’d do it out of the kindness of his heart did you?” Reece asked.

  “I guess I believe in the good of people,” I joked.

  “You?” Reece smirked, sarcasm heavy in his voice. “You don’t believe in the good of anyone.”

  I shook my head. “That’s not true. I believe in the good of you.”

  “Yes, but I had to fight tooth and nail for that honor.”

  “What’s this I hear?” Aaron said getting to his feet. “Trouble in paradise?”

  “Shut up.” Reece shoved him back down.

  Aaron reached over, grabbed a throw pillow off the couch and hit Reece with it. Reece dove at his brother and wrapped his arm around his neck, catching him in a headlock. Aaron muttered under his breath, and tried to reverse their positions.

  I enjoyed the lighthearted spirit between the two boys. Although they looked way too big to be carrying on like a couple of five year olds, I laughed as I watched them roughhousing until I found myself standing between Diane and Howie. Both looked on with disapproving looks. I felt incredibly guilty, as if I were the one caught doing something wrong.

  Howie cleared his throat. The boys stopped and turned to their father who stood over them shaking his head.

  “Is this really how you want Jenna to remember her evening here?”

  “Why don’t we have dessert now?” Diane offered.

  We follow
ed her back into the kitchen. The aroma of fresh coffee filled the air. The dessert dishes were set, a pre-sliced, fruit topped cheesecake sat waiting on the table. The conversation went much smoother than during dinner. Aaron took center stage talking about the three girls he was dating and baseball.

  I wondered, although he would never admit it, if Aaron purposefully dominated the conversation to keep his brother in a happy, safe zone. Either way Reece carried on in his easy going, playful manner.

  I couldn’t help but look at Reece in awe and wonder how he so completely captured every piece of my heart. It didn’t matter. The bottom line: I was hopelessly in love with him.

  Chapter 23

  “It wasn’t that bad was it?” Reece asked once we hit the highway.

  “No.” I shook my head. “Not too bad.”

  “Told you,” he glimpsed over for a second, something telling in his eyes. “I thought meeting them now might be more comfortable than next week.”

  “Next week?” I asked confused.

  “I’m going home Sunday. I have to spend some time with them before going back to school. Did you forget?”

  “This Sunday?” I tried my best to keep the disappointment out of my voice. I felt as if a dark storm cloud just rolled in and covered me, ready to let loose.

  “You forgot.” He nodded. “I had a feeling.”

  My stomach churned.

  I stared at him in the driver’s seat, the moonlight and dashboard offering seductive illuminations against his skin. I reached for his hand and rubbed it between both of mine. He drove in silence.

  Once again I felt overwhelmed by him, his manner, his energy, everything about him. I turned to look out my window. I thought of the white electricity that shot through my veins every time we touched and wondered how that would change when we didn’t see each other every day.

  And then my mind raced back to his bedroom, back to his bed.

  I didn’t know how to handle these sudden longings. How to keep them at bay. I only knew I wanted to be with him. In every way possible.