Last Resort Love

by Holly Cortelyou

  Krissa’s eyes widened. Nick had a big smile on his face and then he swooped in and hugged her tightly. Their faces were pressed tightly cheek to cheek. Krissa stopped breathing and a dark knot build in her core. She watched as Nick said a few words to Angie and then the couple walked off together. Side by side and in rhythm.

  Krissa sat like a stone until she finally pushed her cold food away, put a twenty dollar bill on the table and darted out of the diner.

  * * * *

  Krissa passed a long evening of movies and channel surfing, and she jumped every time she thought she heard tires crunching down the driveway. Nick’s house remained dark and Krissa wondered if he was out of town or perhaps he was avoiding her too. Her brow crinkled and her lips pursed. He must be staying at the resort or Angie’s. Her soul shriveled up at the notion, but she found it hard to believe. He had only hugged Angie. They hadn’t been holding hands. But Nick had looked so happy.

  How could he say those things to her, but still be chasing after Angie? It didn’t make sense. She groaned at the thought of everything she’d told him about Tim and the miscarriage. She’d bared her soul. He knew everything now. Why hadn’t she just kept it to herself?

  Her phone chirped the arrival of a message. Krissa inhaled deeply and read, “Please call me back. No games. I really need to talk to you. Tim.”

  Her mind spun in about a thousand directions. Why should she talk to him? There was no way he could want her back. Her stomach churned at the thought. A part of her heart might hate his guts for being a cowardly ass who left her pregnant and supremely brokenhearted, but she really was over him.

  She knew deep down that she was relieved that he had left. They were too boring together. There’d been no spark. Spark was what she had with Nick. Ha! More like a conflagration. She tried to block that thought.

  Could she actually call Tim? Hell, why not? It would be uncomfortable, but didn’t they have unfinished business? Surely he owed her some kind of apology at least.

  She texted him: “I am home. Call.”

  She almost laughed at herself and smirked at her texting attitude. After all, she was the injured party here. She said a little prayer for some closure. And serenity. Be a grown-up, she whispered to herself.

  The phone rang. She held her breath for a moment and expelled it slowly.

  They spoke awkwardly at first and asked about each other’s jobs and families. Finally, Krissa grew tired of it.

  “Tim, what’s on your mind? You need to tell me something, so go ahead and say it.”

  “It might hurt you some more,” Tim said carefully.

  Ah. Clarity came instantly. She knew exactly why he’d called. Funny, it hurt a little, but it didn’t rankle in her soul. It was truly okay.

  “You know Naomi and I got married a few months ago?”

  “Yep, I saw all sorts of stuff relating to it on Facebook.”

  “Thought you might,” Tim said with a laugh.

  “No escaping it…we have all the same friends.”

  “Well, Naomi and I talked it over and we really thought that you needed to know before any of our friends. We’re having a baby.”

  Yep, she thought, she’d called it—pregnant. She checked her emotions. Nope. No hurt. She simply felt sad and spent, but relieved that it was all over with Tim. She figured that Tim’s new wife must have made him call. Maybe Naomi was as nice as everyone said. It didn’t matter. She felt a little wispy sadness for her little dream that never made it into the world in blue or pink.

  “Are you happy this time?” Krissa asked gently.

  There was a pause, and she was sure that Tim was trying to figure out if she was being cruel or hateful.

  “I am really happy,” he blurted out. “And I am so sorry for what a jerk I was to you. Really sorry.”

  “Tim,” she started, but he interrupted.

  “Krissa, please just let me talk. I need to say some stuff.”

  She almost laughed. He must surely have a lot on his conscience. Was she ready to let him off the hook?

  “You must have guessed that I was pretty unhappy the last six months we were together.”

  He gulped a bit and then a rush of words came out.

  “You were so happy with your job, Krissa, and your career was perfect for you, but I’d realized that I hated being the tech guy on the service call hotline and needed something different. But we were getting married and I had to be serious and earn money and be an equal partner. Then when you got pregnant, I felt doomed and trapped. I was never going to be able to make a change—a responsible father supports his family. I couldn’t quit.

  “I met Naomi by accident,” Tim continued. “I promise that I wasn’t out looking. It just sort of happened.”

  Krissa rolled her eyes. How convenient. Isn’t that what they all said when caught cheating?

  “Once I met Naomi, I realized that you and I had rushed things and should never have gotten engaged. We had just done what all of our friends thought we should.”

  That part was true enough, she thought.

  The next fifteen minutes were a jumble of words from Tim. One minute he was apologizing profusely for all the pain he had caused and the next minute he was raving about his wife and how supportive she was of his new career—he had opened a computer gaming store.

  Krissa almost laughed out loud that he’d finally found a way to make money from his love of video games. Good for him, but it sure wasn’t what she wanted from life.

  Her mind filled with images of Nick and his strength and charm. His business smarts and his amazing resort empire. She shut down her thoughts about Nick.

  With a few kind words and wishes of good luck for Naomi, Krissa tried to end the call. She couldn’t get off the phone soon enough.

  In the silence of the room, Krissa stared blindly at the muted TV. She closed her eyes and let her emotions flow.

  Her hurt welled up and a sob escaped her lips. She cried for the hurt and the ache and the betrayal. For all the years she’d pined for her father’s love. For the lost baby and the lost dreams.

  Shasta let loose a long, sympathetic howl and Krissa hugged him close to her side.

  As the downpour of tears slowed to a drizzle and a few snuffles, Krissa felt strangely relieved and almost happy. That one apology from Tim somehow filled a gap.

  She gave a small laugh at Tim and his need to make things right with her. It helped. Sorry. It was a small word, but it made such a difference.

  He was free to go about his life now and build his happiness with his wife and their new baby. What about her? What was she free to do now? She saw her life with Tim with a new clarity.

  Her sadness was for the little baby that never made it into her arms. Tim was oh so right when he’d said that they had just done what everyone had expected of them. What else did a couple do when they got along wonderfully, had great friends, and had lots of fun? They got married. But what if they didn’t really have the spark? The magic that carries a couple through thick and thin. She and Tim had just been fun-loving friends.

  Now, with Nick, she knew what true passion and a genuine electric connection was…and a promise of so much more. Could she possibly love Nick? Krissa sat up and mopped the soggy tears off her cheeks with her sweater sleeves.

  She felt curiously light and oddly hopeful for the first time in she couldn’t remember how long.

  * * * *

  Dana and Nick settled back into lounge chairs by the pool and watched her brood splash in the pool with all of the other visiting children from the resort. Dana sipped on a tall, fruity drink and wiggled her chair back into the shade. She wiped a little sweat from her lip and wondered why she always seemed to be pregnant during the warmest months of the year.

  She eyed her brother over and thought he seemed preoccupied. No doubt the resort was on his mind, but she wondered about something else.

  “The rumor mill is spinning about you these days. Any truth to it?” Dana asked.

  “Depends. W
hat does rumor have it?” Nick asked and he popped on his sunglasses.

  Dana’s sisterly radar went off. Nick was hiding something.

  “You and a schoolteacher who isn’t Angie Jarrett.”

  Nick grimaced. “Can’t keep anything private around here.”

  “Hardly.”

  “Let alone us. Always something to talk about with the Olins.”

  “Too true,” she replied. “What with the lodge and all of your business ventures.”

  “Ha! It isn’t just me,” Nick said. “You used to be quite the center of attention with half of the boys in school and now all of your charities and fund-raisers. You’re more the leader of this town than the mayor!”

  “I don’t know what you are talking about.” Dana grinned and lowered her eyes demurely. “I’m a model citizen and only think about what is best for my family and my community.”

  Nick mouthed the words, “Show off,” but she refused to take the bait.

  “You won’t divert me, Nick. What’s up with you these days? You’re trying to distract me and therefore I know that something must be going on!”

  “You already know, so why bother asking?”

  “I’m your big sister and I’m allowed to ask questions. Like it or not I still think of you as my responsibility.” Dana took a small breath.

  “Especially without Mom and Dad here,” they said in unison and then laughed.

  Dana had said it a thousand times at least in the years since their parents had died in a car crash. Nick always heard it with a twinge of irritation, but also with a lot of love and warmth. They always looked out for each other. It was hard to keep much from one another. Dana was big sister and mother all rolled into one.

  “Are you breaking hearts again?” she asked quietly.

  “I’m not so sure about that,” Nick said with a frown. “I’m not sure that’s in my power with Krissa. She’s a tough nut to crack.”

  “That makes it sound like you would like to be able to break her heart.”

  “I sure can’t tell what she’s thinking half the time. One minute everything is going great and the next she shuts down and runs off like a scalded cat.”

  “Krissa seems really nice, and she gets along with my kids and all of her school kids. She doesn’t seem like someone who would run hot and cold. Or tease you.”

  “I’m pretty sure I’m the problem, and she’s scared.” Nick stopped.

  “Don’t be silly,” Dana said loyally. “You’re practically perfect. There is nothing scary about you.”

  Nick looked sheepish and uncomfortable, but he asked, “Do you know anything I don’t?”

  Dana hid her surprise. If Nick was asking for help with a girl, maybe he was getting serious about Krissa. “I would bet she is pretty jumpy after her last relationship. From what she’s told me, I understand it was a really rough break-up. It was a couple of years ago, though.”

  “I wonder if she’s over that guy.”

  “I guess you never really know, but I think she is,” Dana said. “She didn’t have that ‘if only’ look on her when she told me about him. She’s pretty happy that she’s living here and that she’s gotten away from him. She did tell me that she isn’t really interested in dating and just wants to focus on her classroom and making friends. Maybe it’s just too soon for her to start another relationship.”

  “Maybe she likes me, but doesn’t want to.”

  “That’s a possibility.” Dana laughed and then said, “But will that slow you down? You usually ignore roadblocks.”

  “I like challenges—especially when the prize is so…” Nick stopped himself and grinned at his sister.

  Dana waggled a finger at him. “Don’t you dare play games with Krissa. She’s awfully nice, and I don’t want to see her get hurt.”

  “Who says I am playing games?”

  Dana eyed him up and down. “I don’t think you’ve ever been serious about anyone. Even that Angie thing back in college—that was just puppy love. You just aren’t very trusting, are you?”

  “You tell me,” Nick said with a scowl. “You seem to have it all figured out.”

  Dana knew better than to bring up their parents, but she was sure that since they’d passed away her brother always held back his emotions and some of his trust. It had been such a painful loss that he was afraid to love that much again in case that person disappeared on him. Dana thought about her husband and her children and felt so thankful that she had them so close to her heart. Should she encourage Nick to go after Krissa? Was he really serious about her? If he was, he sure wouldn’t need any encouragement from her.

  “It may sound funny,” Nick said, “but she’s the first woman I’ve known who even comes close to being as wonderful as you—funny, loyal, and loving.”

  Uh-oh, Dana thought. He’s hooked.

  “It is probably nothing,” Nick said as he shrugged, “but she keeps popping up wherever I go in town. I put her out of my mind and then there she is again.”

  “It is a small community,” Dana said with a laugh. “Everyone keeps popping up. All the time. She lives pretty close too.”

  “There’s an understatement,” Nick said. “But she’s starting to be that itch that never gets scratched and just drives you nuts.”

  Dana laughed and hugged him close for a moment. “I love you, little brother.” Nick chuckled and gave her baby belly a rub. “And the same to you, little Anderson number five.”

  * * * *

  Hours later, Nick pushed the mouse and keyboard away from him and leaned back in his chair staring out his office window at the resort. He barely noticed the pines and firs or the clear blue sky. He groaned and rubbed his eyes in frustration. He couldn’t concentrate. His brain refused to focus on the proposal just emailed over to him. Krissa’s stricken face kept drifting into his mind.

  She’d looked so distraught and so sad when she ordered him to leave. It was like all hope had drained out of her. It was as if she was not only giving up on them, but was giving up all hope of a future.

  She really must believe that she wasn’t worthy of love. How could she think something that incredibly foolish? She was a wonderful, loving woman who any man would be thrilled to have.

  Her father and her ex-fiancé must have really broken her spirit and her ability to trust men. Her brother was pretty immature and self-centered too. Not good role models.

  Nick thought about his parents and Dana and Brett. He felt his insides tighten up at the thought of his folks. Although they had died almost twenty years ago, he could still see them clearly in his mind. They were often holding hands and almost always laughing at something—as if the world was one big joke. They’d been so in love with each other and had adored the daylights out of each of their children.

  He thought about the ache in his heart from his absent parents. How must Krissa feel? Her father had barely shown that he cared. Hell, her father’s actions showed that he didn’t care and didn’t love her enough to take part in her life. Then, she finally met a nice guy and right when it seemed to have all fallen into place and she was going to have it all—pow!—he pulls the rug out from under her. She lost the man she loved and the baby she must have been so excited about. He couldn’t imagine the agony Krissa must have gone through.

  Nick cringed. It was twenty times worse than the teenage angst he felt on finding out that Angie had been dating him for his inheritance. His heartbreak had simply opened his eyes. Krissa’s pain had shut her down—almost completely. He was surprised that she had even given in to him at all.

  He thought of Krissa in his arms. It had been an amazing night that he couldn’t get out of his mind. His release had been mind-blowing, but the long night of conversation and love-making had staggered him. It was so…right. So perfect. He tried to imagine never seeing her again, and the mere thought of it was bleak beyond belief. He already missed her sexy, swaying hips and her luscious lips.

  What was he going to do? Was he going to obey her orders and stay
away? She might really mean it and never want a real relationship. What did he want? Was he all in? Was he playing for keeps?

  “What’s it going to be, Nicholas Olin?” he said out loud.

  His eyes stared out the window, but his brain was streaking at full speed. The minutes ticked by on the oversized clock hanging next to a decorative bookcase.

  Nick wiggled the mouse again and the computer screen popped back to life. He drummed his fingers idly on the desk and reviewed the final proposal from the Marindon Group.

  It was go-time. He picked up the phone and hit the speed dial for Phil Marindon.

  Chapter 22

  FOURTH of July dawned gloriously clear and sunny with the promise of ninety degree weather. Krissa sipped her coffee and took her first peek out at the driveway. No sign of Nick’s pickup. She didn’t know if she felt relieved or sad.

  She shook her head and told herself to stop being so foolish. She’d chased Nick off and he didn’t want to see her anymore, and she didn’t want to see him either. So, it was all good. The next time she saw him, she would be pleasant but distant. Nick was not a part of her life nor was he going to be. She needed to remember that he would be leaving Wescott Springs soon.

  She wished that the idea brought her more happiness, but she just felt lonely.

  Maybe someday she might meet a man who would stick around and want to make a life with her. Krissa tried to smile at the thought. She knew she was making progress and at least she wasn’t completely running from the notion of trusting someone enough to share her life. She just wished her heart would stop whispering Nick’s name.

  Krissa wrinkled her nose and told herself to stop wishing for something that was never going to happen.

  She stood indecisively in the middle of the kitchen until her phone rang. Her heart skittered to a halt but started up again when she heard Dana’s voice.

  “Eli specifically wanted me to make sure that you are coming out today to join us at the resort,” Dana began. “There’s lots of food and of course the lake and the pool for everyone. We’d love to have you join us.”