Sunflowers

by Melodie Starkey

  “Yes!”

  Maureen looked disappointed at first, then surprised at the invitation. “Um, sure. When?”

  “If you come before 7:00, I’ll feed you. If not, at least before 9:00.”

  “Thanks! I’ll be there!”

  He picked up the costume and called, “C‘mon, Sam. Let’s hit the road.” He waved goodbye to Dave while Sam hugged Maureen a last time. As they cut through the house, he heard the girls squealing, “Oh my gawd! Do you think that’s him?”

  In the car Sam insisted on wearing the mask. Finally he took it off and said, “Daddy?”

  “Yeah?”

  “I don’t like Mommy’s family so much. I think they’re kinda bullies.”

  “Yes, they are. But part of that is because they love Mommy so much, and they don’t like to see her sad. They know she’s sad that she didn’t get to see you growing up.”

  “That grandpa told me I could live with him and that grandma and Mommy in a big house like that one.”

  “I see. What did you tell him?”

  “I tol’ him I hadda live with you and Frodo, and I wanted Mommy to come live in our house.”

  “Did he make a crabby face?”

  “Yep. How come they all kep’ sayin’ you don’t got a job? You got a job, right?”

  “Yes, I do. Do you know what my job is?”

  “‘Course. You take care of me an’ Jordan.”

  Gus laughed. “No, that’s not my job. That’s my life. Do you know what I do that makes our money?”

  “You write games. Craig says you write real tough ones sometimes that he can hardly beat.”

  He chuckled. “Glad to hear I can stump him a little. But see, just because I do that at home, people who are used to old fashioned jobs where you gotta dress nice and go to an office every day don’t understand. Okay?”

  “I’m gonna have a job like yours. I’m gonna have five boys and teach ‘em to swim and play with ‘em every day.”

  “My goodness! You’re going to be busy!”

  “You can live with us, okay?”

  “Thank you.”

  He put the mask back on for awhile, then suddenly pulled it back off. “Do you love my mommy?”

  He hesitated, weighing possible responses, then simply nodded. “Yes.”

  “Me, too.”

  Chapter 33

  Sam ran to the door to let her in while Gus was in the kitchen. He guessed by her greeting that Darth Maul had opened the door. He smiled, then smiled more to hear her address Jordan as the Sith Lord. She instructed them both to turn from the Dark Side, then allowed them to steer her to the kitchen.

  “Princess Leia, I presume?”

  “Don’t be silly. I’m Obi-Wan. Just in disguise.” She kissed him quickly, which froze both the boys in their tracks, then she added with a smile, “Sort of like you, yes?”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “You don’t? You just coincidentally left this afternoon about ten seconds before the girls came out with your Wiki bio?”

  “I have a Wiki bio? How cool is that!”

  “And you didn’t know that when you told them to Google you.”

  “I knew there was an article out there about me in eGamer’s Magazine that speculated about my net worth.”

  She looked around. “So where is it?”

  “What?”

  “This is a nice place. But hardly millionaire fare. And you drive a Honda.”

  “Excellent car. Which I paid cash for. Same as the house. But the rest is socked away. College fund for Sam. Money market funds. Retirement. A trust. Do you want to review it for me and see where I could do better?”

  She squinted. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means I’m acknowledging you know a whole lot more than I do about investing. I’ve pretty much gone conservative with everything because I’m the first to admit I have no idea what all these funds and such are.”

  She didn’t respond.

  “Maureen?”

  She looked down at the boys then. “Hey, guys! Should we help make dinner?”

  “No!” they chorused, running from the room making saber noises.

  “So what did your family say?” he asked.

  “Cathy was very quiet. Dave thought it was funny. My dad said it didn’t change the fact that you were probably planning to vote for Kerry.”

  “I am, indeed. And I’ve contributed the most I could to his campaign, plus a ton of money to MoveOn.org. I also voted for Gore, and I give money to PETA. Be sure to tell him that for me.”

  She shook her head. “You want to know one of the things I always loved about you? The way my family couldn’t get under your skin. It’s amazing. I wish you could teach me.”

  “There’s two tricks to it. First, whenever they’re antagonizing you, you just imagine that they are sitting there in their underwear, and concentrate on not laughing. I learned that from an episode of the Brady Bunch.”

  She giggled, then asked, “What’s the other secret?”

  “You need to remind yourself that there is nothing in the world they can say or do that can gall you more than it galls them that you’re sleeping with their daughter.”

  She guffawed at this. “Oh, you’re dead right there!”

  When he just looked at her, she blushed. “What?”

  He shook his head slightly, turning away. “So I have ribs marinating. You want to man the grill or shuck ears of corn?”

  “Since you’re the man, I’ll shuck. This sounds good.”

  “I made a spinach and fruit salad, too, so we can play healthy.”

  “Will Sam eat that?”

  “Sure. I told him horses love it. He’s really not a fussy eater, though, other than his condiments obsession. And the part where he forgets that bread crust and pizza crust and such are edible.”

  “Yeah. I gather he’s a big Red Lobster fan.”

  “Likes the popcorn shrimp. Clam strips. All those really unhealthy deep-fried things. And then we follow it with salmon and broccoli. Here.” He handed her the ears of corn, then lifted out the tray of ribs. “Let’s head outside.” As she started toward the back door, he called down the hallway, “We’ll be on the back porch. Don’t go out front without telling me.”

  “‘Kay!” the boys shouted back.

  When the food was ready, Gus summoned the boys into the kitchen. Maureen watched, puzzled, as he dug in a drawer while they both removed their clothes down to their underwear, then Gus pulled old stained tshirts of his own over their heads. He explained to her, “Messy food clothes. So we don’t have to fuss about it.”

  “Brilliant!”

  “Okay, gentlemen, what are we drinking?”

  “Pineapples!” Jordan shouted.

  “Yes!” Sam agreed.

  Maureen asked, “Pineapples?”

  “Sorry. I only have two.” He got out two Tippee-cups shaped like Sponge Bob’s house and filled them with pineapple juice. “I do have plenty of juice, though.”

  “Man, I can’t even remember the last time I drank pineapple juice! I guess with you….”

  “You definitely drank it with me. Want ice?”

  By the time the meal was finally finished, both boys had hand-streaks of barbeque sauce down their shirts, and corn, butter, and sauce smeared across their faces and into their hair. Gus announced, “To the bathtub, men!”

  Sam turned to Maureen, demanding, “Don’t leave!”

  “I promise!” She started gathering the dishes.

  They returned before long, shining clean and smelling of baby shampoo, both wearing Lord of the Rings pajamas. Sam explained, “On other Sundays Jordy sleeps at our house. We got matching jammies for it. But he sleeps with me an’ Fro, so there’s still that extra bedroom…”

  “Sam.” Gus cut him off.

  Maureen smiled. “You guys are so lucky to live so close to your best friend! I hope you never end up moving apart.”

  The boys looked at Gus anxi
ously. He smiled reassurance. “No, we’re all pretty much settled in this neighborhood for good. Jordan’s dad has a coffee shop nearby, and his mom works at the court house.”

  “You could work at the bank in our town,” Sam suggested.

  “Well, I might have to look into that some day,” Maureen answered. “But for now I work in Chicago, and I really need to get going before too long. That was a lovely dinner!”

  “First tuck us in!” Sam ordered, grabbing her arm. Jordan took her other hand tentatively.

  Maureen reassuringly squeezed his hand. “Okay. Do we need to brush teeth and all that still?”

  “All done,” Gus assured her, “although a bathroom stop is probably a good idea. Boys only.”

  “Oh. Yeah. I’ll wait in the bedroom.”

  Gus supervised last pit stops, then hugged them both and sent them into the bedroom, retreating to the kitchen to finish the cleanup that Maureen had been working on. Finally, still hearing voices from the bedroom although there was less giggling now, he moved outside to sit in the dark. She had been completely relaxed and happy around both the boys all evening, even intervening when they decided to spit juice between their teeth and argued about the exact wording of the Sponge Bob theme song (which she somehow knew in its entirety). She taught them Amslan for their names and their eating utensils, and taught Frodo how to play dead, which looked a lot like sleeping.

  What made him think he was the only person qualified to parent his son? She had been helping Cathy raise her daughters after her divorce when he met her. He remembered how she had lamented not finishing college—she had quit with one year to go because it was just too hard while working full time. What she had wanted to do was teach grade school. And of course now she would never be able to do that, either, with her record.

  How different everything could have been if he had just been more supportive of her; more nurturing in their relationship. What if he had said, “Stop working! I make enough to support us both. Finish school and follow your dream.” What if he’d just said, “I’m sorry. You’re right,” and helped her clean the house?

  “Hey.”

  He started at her voice.

  “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. What‘cha thinking about so seriously?”

  “Nn. Are they asleep?”

  “Pretty close. They’re sure full of energy! How do you get anything else accomplished?”

  “Fortunately, I’m still a bit of a night owl. And during the school year I’m meaner about bed time, plus I can work while he’s gone.”

  “I should shove off now. I…thank you. For asking…for letting me be part of this. I know it’s awkward for you…”

  He stood up and crossed to where she stood in the doorway, looking so fragile and beautiful in the backlight. He touched his fingers to her thick, dark hair—almost as soft as Sam’s. When she didn’t move away, leaned down and kissed her tenderly. Then he stepped back, waiting. At her stunned look he said, “I’m sorry. I… Let me walk you to your car before I say something stupid.”

  She nodded, ducking her head and turning away. He followed silently as she gathered her purse and ruffled Frodo’s fur as she passed him on the way out the door. In the driveway, he held her car door for her, then mumbled, “I’m sorry.”

  She shook her head, smiling, then started the car.

  Gus stood in the driveway, staring into the hole in his life long after she had driven away.

  Chapter 34

  “Hear you had a bit of a dinner party last night,” Frank commented.

  “Mm. Were my neighborly spies timing how late she stayed?”

  “Are you kidding? After the last one was still here in the morning? I’m surprised they didn’t have a lawn chair delegation going on across the street.”

  “We need to start our own episode of The Young and the Restless.”

  Frank nodded. “Think they could get George Clooney to play me?”

  “Only if Jon Stewart plays me.”

  Frank laughed and saluted him with his beer, then said, “So give me the scoop. On both.”

  “The first one was just Sarah. Sam was over at my folks for the night, and we’d been drinking, plus the weather turned, so she stayed.”

  “Very hospitable of you.”

  “Leave me alone. You get yours any night you want.”

  “Okay, okay. So the Princess?”

  “Maureen. If you checked with your under four foot sources, that visit was not for me. She spent the whole evening playing with them and feeding them and tucking them in. I’m trying to let her have as much time as she wants with him under my eye so she doesn’t try to push to take him.”

  “And that’s all.”

  “Yes.”

  “Not convincing, Pal.”

  “I know. But I’m trying to convince myself.” He sighed. “We were together for close to four years. Lived together for three years. And except for the last four or five months, it was… I really thought she was the one, you know? I thought…” He shook his head.

  “Flame still flickering, is it?”

  “‘Fraid so. It’s so hard to see her. To try to act neutral.”

  “What’re you gonna do when she marries? Didn’t you say…?”

  “They broke up.”

  “Really? Over this?”

  “Yeah. Over Sam. The whole thing with Sam. That she hadn’t told him.”

  “Is she upset about it?”

  “I don’t know. She’s so into Sam that she doesn’t seem to think about much else when he’s around.”

  “How ‘bout you?”

  “Me?”

  “You have any sense for how she feels about you?”

  “I don’t. I mean, she’s nice to me. But she needs to be, to get access to Sam. Her family hates me. Always has. And they’re very controlling.” He swigged his beer, then said, “What about Sam? If I asked her to give me another chance and it didn’t work out? Do you think it’s better if I never get him hoping…?”

  “He’s never going to stop hoping, Gus. Before she even showed up, he was hoping. And so are you. I can see it in your eyes. Give it a chance. You need this.”

  Chapter 35

  They didn’t hear from her all week. Gus called her cell phone, but it went straight to voice mail. Left her a message to call him when she got a chance.

  At first Sam was too busy worrying about the upcoming start of school. But as they moved into the next week, he wanted to know why she hadn’t shown up or at least emailed him on the weekend.

  Finally on Wednesday, as a distraction, Gus loaded Sam and Jordan into his SUV and went bicycle shopping. After looks of utter disdain at the salesman who suggested they needed models that training wheels could be added to, they ended up with a pair of $700 BMX bikes, complete with mag wheels and studs. Jordan chose black with red flaming trim, And Sam chose silver with black and blue trim. Gus also bought himself a three speed, and added helmets, elbow pads, wrap-around sun glasses, deluxe cable locks, and riding gloves to their haul.

  When they arrived home, Craig and his friends came over to help unload, exclaiming over their awesome choices and taking them for test rides. Finally, after a couple of hours of coaxing and catching and Popsicle breaks, both boys were able to ride between their houses and come to somewhat wobbly but upright stops. Sam named his bike Rocket, and Jordan named his Speed Demon. The other neighbor children were appropriately awed.

  That evening Sam asked, “Can we send Mommy a pitcher of my bike?”

  “All right.”

  “Thank you for buyin’ it. And buyin’ one for Jordan, too.”

  “You’re welcome. But let’s get one thing straight right now: when we go buy you a car in ten years, we’re only buying one, okay?”

  Sam giggled and hugged him.

  “Okay, let’s send these pictures.”

  They uploaded the pictures from his camera, then Sam dictated the message: “Hi, Mommy! Look at these pitchers! Me an’ Jordan got new bikes and we can ride them
. Daddy bought them for us. He bought one for him, too, but it’s just plain. Prob’ly if you want he will buy you one, too, and you can ride with me. But you have to wear a helmet. Craig showed me how to jump it off the curb and ride on one wheel but I’m gonna wait ‘til I’m six to do that. Ricky’s mom said it ain’t fair that Daddy bought Jordan a bike but didn’t buy Ricky one. I told her it’s ‘cause Jordy is my best friend and his family is nice to me and I think she smells bad. Daddy said I prob’ly shouldn’t say that to grownups, but he laughed. I feel sorry for Ricky having that mom.

  “On Monday I go to first grade. Please come see me before then. Poor Daddy is gonnta be alone all day…”

  “And just fine with that,” Gus injected, not adding this lament to the message.

  Sam rolled his eyes, then said, “I hope you aren’t working too hard. I love you. Love, Sammy. PS: tell that one girl thank you so much for the costume ‘cause ever’ body loves it. She could prob’ly be my friend.”

  Gus smiled at this. “Okay. Send it?”

  “Send it. Do you think she’ll see it tonight?”

  “I don’t know. Not everyone looks at their email as much as I do, because they don’t have computer-type jobs. It might be a day or two, okay?”

  Sam’s shoulders sagged a little.

  “What I do think we should do is call Grandma and Grandpa and see if they want to come out for lunch tomorrow so they can watch you ride. How’s that sound?”

  “Really?” He perked back up.

  “Let’s give it a try.”

  “Grandma will like my helmet.”

  Gus grinned. “You’ve got her pegged.” He dialed the phone. “You want to ask them?”

  Sam nodded happily and took the phone. “Hi, Gramma! It’s me, Sam! Can you come to my house for lunch tomorrow?” He frowned a little. “I gotta show you something important. It’s important.” He held out the phone. “She gots ta talk to you.”

  “Hello?”

  “Is something wrong?”

  Gus forced back a groan. “No, Mom. He has a new bicycle. He wants you to see him ride it. You guys are important to him.”

  “You’re not trying to get us to pay for it…”