Little Cowgirl on His Doorstep (Mills & Boon Cherish) (Cadence Creek Cowboys - Book 3)

by Alward, Donna

  “You can always leave Clara your cell number and she can call if she needs anything.”

  Avery nodded and turned back to Clara. “Okay,” she said, smiling. “And thank you. I haven’t had a night out since she was born. We’ll get her car seat and everything you should need is in the diaper bag.”

  Molly touched Avery’s arm. “It’s always hard leaving them for the first time. You enjoy yourself and I don’t want to see you until morning. Might as well let her sleep rather than get her up again later.”

  “I don’t know what to say,” Avery replied.

  Callum stepped up. “We really appreciate it. I’ll go get her seat and meet you at Ty’s truck, Clara.”

  In a handful of minutes they had all the kids buckled in and diaper bags sorted and Callum watched as Ty and Clara drove off with his daughter. He swallowed around a lump in his throat. Avery stood by his shoulder and he reached down and took her hand. “A few weeks ago I didn’t know she even existed and now I feel so strange watching her drive away.” He squeezed her fingers and decided to be brutally honest. “I can’t imagine what it’s going to feel like watching her fly away in a few days.”

  Music started up in the community hall and the sounds echoed, slightly distorted, to where they stood in the parking lot. Avery squeezed back. “I know. Let’s not think about it now, okay? Let’s check out the dance with Angela and Sam and kick up our heels. It’s the perfect ending to a fun day and I might not get the chance to have the authentic experience again.”

  They joined the others at the hall where the country music was thumping enthusiastically and already couples were swinging around the floor in a two-step. He bought them each a soft drink and they stood on the fringes, just watching the stomping, circling crowd for a while.

  It had been a long time since he’d felt a part of anything. It used to be the army, until his personal life fell apart and then he’d screwed that up big-time, leaving before he could be forced out. For months it had seemed like there was nowhere he belonged. But today…today had changed all that. Today he became a member of the town—right down to the boots and Smithbilt hat. He had friends again. None of that would have happened without the advent of Avery in his life. Without her—without Nell—he’d still be sitting at home, licking his wounds.

  After a fast set, the music slowed. “Care to?” he asked, holding out his hand.

  She bit down on her lip, the way she did when she was nervous, he realized. It gave him confidence. It wasn’t just him. She was feeling it, too. He had to tread carefully but there was something there, and if they didn’t address it tonight, there wouldn’t be another chance, would there?

  “Did you come to watch or did you come to dance?” he asked.

  She put her hand in his and he led her out on the floor. Stopped and put his hand on her waist, then turned the other and captured her fingers in his. Her left hand skimmed his ribs and he inhaled sharply.

  And then, because he couldn’t help himself, he slid his hand to the small of her back and drew her closer as they started to move.

  Avery’s whole body was on high alert, especially with the warmth of Callum’s wide hand seeping through the waistband of her jeans. In boots and his new hat, he was more tall and imposing than ever, but no longer frightening—at least not in the way she’d initially imagined. There was a gentleness to him she’d missed the first few days she’d been in Cadence Creek. He’d relaxed since then, been more like the man she remembered meeting all those months ago, except maybe more cautious and guarded.

  Now, without Nell between them, this felt very much like a date. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but when Clara had offered to take the baby for the night, there’d been a light in Callum’s eyes. As they moved on the dance floor, she realized quite suddenly that they were going to be completely alone at the house tonight.

  As if he could read her thoughts, he pulled her closer until their bodies brushed and the song shifted into another slow one, this time a waltz. He lowered his head and caught her gaze. “Can you waltz?” he asked.

  She nodded even as the electricity between them seemed to spike. His hand pressed even more firmly on her back and he caught the beat, moving smoothly into the rocking three-count rhythm.

  She was waltzing with Callum Shepard at a rodeo dance. It seemed utterly surreal and strangely perfect.

  When the song was over, he paused for a moment before letting her go. “Thanks,” he murmured, and she nodded, backing out of his embrace and hoping her cheeks weren’t blazing as hotly as she thought they were.

  They met up with Sam and Angela on the sidelines and got another cool drink as the room heated up. When the next two-step came on, Sam held out his hand for Avery. “Do you know how?”

  She shook her head. “Not at all.”

  He waggled his hand. “Then it’s time you learned. Come on.”

  She looked up at Callum, who was grinning at her smugly. “Go ahead.”

  “You’re not off the hook,” Angela said, grabbing Callum’s hand. “You have to learn, too.”

  Avery laughed as he pulled back. “Uh, I don’t think so,” he protested.

  “Come on. If she has to, you have to.”

  Avery giggled as Sam instructed her in the counting of the steps. “Okay,” he said, “once you get the rhythm down, I’ll show you how to do turns.”

  It took a minute or two, and every now and again she’d slip in her count and add an extra step, but before long they were moving smoothly. She looked over and saw Callum leading Angela with a smile on his face. He moved his hand and Angela slid beneath his arm, executing a perfect turn. Avery was so caught up with watching that she tripped and Sam kept her upright with a strong hand.

  “They’re showing us up. What do you think, are you ready to go under?”

  “I don’t know…”

  “Just let my hand guide you, and when you come back step on the one.”

  The first try she was a little off, but by the second she was good. And by the bridge of the song he’d maneuvered them closer to Angela and Callum and then deftly switched partners so she was in Callum’s embrace again.

  He grinned as they picked up the steps, somewhat less confident than they’d been with their previous partners but managing just the same. “Having fun?” he asked.

  She nodded, amazed when he lifted his hand and guided her through a turn. “You’ve got natural rhythm, Callum.”

  His gray eyes caught hers and held and the room seemed suddenly overwarm.

  The song ended and Avery deliberately put some space between her and Callum. She chatted to a few ladies about her cupcakes and watched as Callum talked to some local ranchers along with Sam. She was always aware of where he was, and when the band announced a break for the fireworks display, he found her with his eyes and raised his eyebrows, a silent question. Were they going to go outdoors with the others?

  They met at the door to the hall and stepped outside where it was surprisingly cool after the heat from the dancing.

  “Where do you want to watch?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know, anywhere, I suppose. We don’t have anything to sit on.”

  “I can fix that. Wait here.”

  He jogged off to the parking lot and came back a minute later with a scratchy wool blanket. “I always keep it in the back for emergencies,” he explained. “Not that this is an emergency, but it’ll at least keep us off the dirt.”

  They placed it on the ground among the group that had gathered and Avery sat, crossing her legs and resting her elbows on her knees. It had been such a perfect day, and she realized with some surprise that she was going to miss the town, too. Callum lifted a hand to wave at someone and Avery understood that it was the sort of place where neighbors knew each other and helped each other. She’d never lived anywhere quite like it, hadn’t even been sure such a place actually existed.

  Callum sat beside her, stretched out his long legs and leaned back on his elbows. He’d removed his hat and plac
ed it on the blanket beside him, and she noticed it had flattened a ring of hair around his head. She longed to reach out and ruffle the dark strands, but after that last dance and her unintentional innuendo, she kept her hands to herself.

  The first burst exploded in the sky, and a chorus of “oohs” rippled through the crowd, punctuated by sounds of delight coming from the children. Once it got started, the rockets kept coming at a regular tempo, lighting up the night with colorful cascades after each pop. Avery looked over at Callum, surprised to see his jaw tense and a muscle there tick tightly as the sound exploded. He was staring straight ahead, not at the display above them. Avery’s stomach knotted. He wasn’t enjoying it for whatever reason.

  Then a series of fireworks exploded straight up, one after another, long tails and flashes and Callum flinched after each sharp report.

  Finally the display ended and the crowd clapped and cheered. Avery did, too, but only politely as Callum picked up his hat and settled it on his head.

  As people dispersed, heading back to the hall, Callum turned his head to her. “You ready to go back in?”

  She got the feeling that going back to the gaiety of the dance was the last thing Callum wanted, and it had already been a long day. “I think I’ve had my fill. Why don’t we just go home?”

  Was that relief she saw on his face? It was hard to tell, the way it was shadowed, but she didn’t miss the quick nod. “That’s fine, then. If you’re tired.”

  She didn’t dispute it and they folded up the blanket. Avery carried it in her arms as they made their way to the parking lot and Callum unlocked the truck. They were halfway home before Avery got up the courage to ask.

  “The fireworks bothered you, didn’t they?”

  He stared out the windshield. “Of course not.”

  What had she expected? It would be unlike Callum to admit any weakness. Even explaining about Jane had been grudging at best, though it had at least paved the way toward a new status quo between them as coparents. This had nothing to do with Nell, or Jane, or anyone else other than Callum.

  “I just thought…Angela said something today that got me thinking, that’s all.”

  “About what?”

  “You and I talked about Jane, but we never talked about what you did before. Your job. You’re a really private man, Callum. You were practically living like a hermit. Angela was saying that sometimes transitioning out of the forces can be difficult…”

  “You told her about Jane?” Anger tinged his words.

  “No, of course not. She just said that up until recently, you’ve been a bit of a loner. I wouldn’t share something you told me in confidence.”

  He visibly relaxed, but only a bit. “Angela’s a social worker,” he said shortly. “I like her, don’t get me wrong, but really, I’m fine.”

  “Then why were you hiding away on your farm when we showed up? The last few days…you’ve been much more the man I remember meeting at Pete and Elizabeth’s wedding. Then during the fireworks, that scowl on your face.” She frowned. “It reminded me of how you looked that first day I knocked on your door and you asked me what I wanted.”

  He turned onto the dirt road that led to his place. “Leave it alone, Avery. We had a nice day. Let’s just leave it at that.”

  Rebuffed, she turned her head to stare out the window. There were no streetlights out here, nothing but the inky-blackness of the prairie meeting the gently rolling foothills. He’d left the light by the front door on, though, and once he’d parked she got out of the truck and headed straight for the door.

  Which he’d locked.

  She waited while he came up behind her and put the key in the lock. The door swung open and Avery put her purse on the floor.

  “Well, good night, then,” she said weakly, not having a clue what else to say. It had been going so well, with the dancing and the long looks and the way he’d held her hand when she’d decided to let go of Nell for the night. Now he was completely closed off to her.

  She was nearly to the hall when his voice stopped her.

  “Avery, wait.”

  She stopped, but didn’t turn around. She wished now she’d flicked on a light when she’d come in the door. Something to dispel the intimacy of the darkness around them.

  “You’re right. The fireworks probably weren’t a good idea. I didn’t know that I’d…well, you know.”

  She did turn then. He was standing close to the door, his hand still on the knob, like he was ready to make his escape at any moment. He couldn’t even say it. She understood anyway. He hadn’t realized he’d react as he had. “Why did you?”

  He took off his hat and held it in his hands. “It’s a long story.”

  “I gathered that. But Jane’s deception was awful, and yet you managed to tell me about it. This, then, must be worse.”

  “It is.” There was a long pause until he finally relented with a sigh. “You knew Pete.”

  “Of course. I was a bridesmaid at the wedding, remember?”

  “And you knew we were deployed together. Including the tour where he didn’t come home, not long after the wedding.”

  Elizabeth and Peter had moved to the new base, and Avery remembered hearing the news. Crystal had already discovered she was expecting a baby and didn’t want anyone to put two and two together, so they’d sent flowers in lieu of traveling for the memorial. In the weeks following, the friendship with Elizabeth had drifted apart. “I knew you were part of the same regiment.”

  “Closer than that. We were in the same section. Like a squad, you know?”

  She didn’t know much about military configuration but she understood it meant they were in a small group together. “Were you hurt the day he was killed, Callum?”

  She asked it gently; it was a difficult question to ask.

  “Not a scratch. Not for me, the section screwup.” His voice was harsh and self-mocking. “I didn’t want to be there—in Afghanistan. I didn’t want to be anywhere. I was bitter about Jane and angry at life and a jackass. The morning that patrol went out, I was sleeping it off. Not fit for duty.” He huffed out a bitter laugh. “Hell, I wasn’t fit for duty anyway, even when I was sober.”

  Avery took a step forward, finally understanding. He’d been punishing himself because of a huge case of survivor’s guilt. “So you feel you failed them?”

  “I should have been there. Hell, it should have been me, not them. The fireworks tonight…they sounded like…”

  She tilted her head and studied him. Like what? Gunfire? Mortars? “But if you’d been there,” she reasoned, “the only thing that would have happened is you would have died, too.”

  “Maybe I could have saved them.”

  “And maybe you all would have been lost.”

  “That doesn’t do a damn thing for my conscience.” He tossed his hat on a chair. “You want to know why it scares me to death to be a father? Because I mess things up for everyone in my life. Jane couldn’t handle me being gone all the time and I ignored her when she asked when I was getting out. Being married to a soldier was too hard for her. She didn’t like being left alone and she couldn’t handle wondering when or even if I’d come back. I knew it and pretended it didn’t matter. She found someone else who would be there for her 24/7. Pete and the others…no matter what you say, I know I should have been there for them. Instead I was a self-indulgent idiot, half drunk and angry at the world. Face it, Avery. I’m a selfish bastard.”

  “But if you’d been with them that day, Nell wouldn’t have a father, either.”

  “Give me time. I’m sure I’ll screw that up, too.”

  He paused, then sighed. “Look, Avery. I pretended to forget all of that these last few weeks. You waltzed in with your smile and your damn cakes and…and everything, and I played along. Tonight was just the reminder I needed. Nell is way better off with you, Avery. We both know it.”

  “So you’re going to, what, go back to being a recluse? Hibernating in this house? Forget about your daughter? You know
what, Callum? That makes me angry.” She didn’t worry about keeping her voice down now, there was no baby to disturb. No one but the two of them in the dark. She took another step, closing the distance between them bit by bit as her temper flared. “Maybe you should have been with them but you weren’t. For some reason you were spared. And instead of being down on your knees and thankful and living the life that they can’t, you’ve buried yourself right along with them. That’s what makes you a coward, Callum Shepard. Not the mistake you made, but your refusal to overcome it. That’s a choice.”

  “So now you’re going to lecture me?” he asked incredulously. “About living, when you were content to live in your sister’s shadow for years?”

  The words hit their mark and she flinched, but she answered truthfully. “I did do that. It was easier. But not anymore. I can’t. I have Nell now, and her future to think of.”

  “And you’re going to hide behind her, too, aren’t you? She needs you. It’s the perfect excuse for you. It’s the perfect way to avoid intimacy or allowing someone too close. You think I don’t see that? I’m not as clueless as you seem to believe.”

  She was getting really angry now. All the things they’d held back over the last two weeks were coming out and they weren’t pretty. The night had started out so amazing and was disintegrating at a rapid pace, and the thought of leaving here in a few days was suddenly tearing her apart. Why did he have to be so stubborn? So blind to what was right in front of him?

  “You think I can’t let people close? That I’m afraid of intimacy?”

  She took the last two steps, closing the remaining distance between them and did what she’d been longing to do ever since the first time they’d kissed on the sofa. She curled her hand around his neck, pressed her body to his and pulled his head down for a kiss.

  His lips were firm and warm and opened slightly in surprise, but only for the breath of a second. Maybe she initiated the contact but he took control now, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her close to his body as the kiss raged out of control. He ripped his mouth from hers, took a breath and let out a curse. “It wasn’t a damn dare, Avery.”