Secrets & Admirers

by Allie York

  “Your brother what?”

  Beck scrunched his eyebrows. “Briggs, my brother, you sleep in his room. I’m going to assume you’re having sex with him. Good for him on that one.” I gave Beck my best put-out look. “The guy loves you. Can’t you tell? All he’s talked about for the past week is asking you to move in. I assume you’re a permanent fixture now, so I don’t want you hating me.” The guy loves you. I looked from Beck’s face to Briggs watching us from across the room. He looked pissed, but had no reason to. None at all. “Anyway, the charms.” I shook my head and went back to studying the bracelet. There were five charms on it. An H in pretty script, a cat, a paw print, a book, and a pen.

  “Beck this is beautiful.” Tears stung my eyes and I blinked rapidly. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever gotten me, especially when that anyone started off as such an asshole. Briggs hardly left my side while I was healing from my bump on the head and the three of us had started playing pool as a nightly ritual, it meant I got to see a different side of Beck. He was a good guy under all the hurt from his childhood and insecurities. “I mean it. Thank you and Merry Christmas.” I threw my arms around his neck, clinging to the box and Beck patted my upper back.

  Briggs cleared his throat and I backed off his brother. “Am I interrupting?”

  Before things could get more heated between the Layton twins, I opened my mouth and let my question fall out, “Do you love me?” The concept was completely foreign. The only person I ever remembered hearing those words from was Rae and she said it often, but no one else. Not my mother, not my sister, not Blake. The idea that a person could choose to love me was overwhelming. The room had gone quiet, watching us, even the kids were quiet. Apparently, I had asked the question a little too loudly.

  “Yeah.” The confusion on Briggs’s face was quickly replaced with recognition. His chocolate eyes glistened with promise. “Yeah, I do. How could I not love you?” His arm snaked around my waist and moved me toward him at an excruciatingly slow pace. “I love you. How have I not told you that? God, I’m a damn idiot,” Briggs mumbled against my mouth, kissing me softly. “I think I loved you the moment you stepped on that bus after some jackass hit my car.”

  I pushed off his chest, trying to digest his words. “Can you love someone after a month? Not even a month. I mean we’ve talked for a month, but we weren’t together. It’s been no time at all.” Love took time, years. Love took countless hours of effort and months of built trust. Love wasn’t seeing someone attractive and love certainly wasn’t sex. Ewan, Nick, and Jacob laughing hysterically made me remember that we had an audience, a big one. I had no idea what they thought was so damn funny, but I felt my face heat, “Sorry, how is that question funny?”

  “It took you a whole month?” Ewan threw his arm around Jovie. “One date. Ask anyone.” His thick accent was dangerously sexy and Jovie blushed, nodding an agreement. “Time means nothing. It’s either right or it’s not, but Briggs is an arse for not telling you sooner.”

  Jacob chimed in, “It took me fourteen years to tell Lyd, but I knew she was mine instantly.” Their story was so sweet, even if a little taboo.

  Rae asked if I remembered when she called me about eloping. I nodded. “We had met three weeks before.” My dearest friends were all staring at me like I was crazy for not instantly falling in love with Briggs. I felt safe with Briggs, I wanted to spend time with him, and he made me smile. The lies he told didn’t matter anymore and I had readily gone home with him. Briggs touching me electrified every inch of my skin, made my heart race, and my chest fill with butterflies. I wanted him happy. Making him smile warmed my heart. I loved his scars, his imperfections, I wanted every waking second to be spent with him. Holy shit, I’m in love with Briggs Layton.

  Instead of saying the obvious, I said something completely stupid, “We should eat. I’m sure everyone is hungry.” I left Briggs at the counter and walked over to plate food. It was quiet for another moment before a line formed and the talking started. After I helped plate some food for the kids, I slipped out down the hall and had almost made it to the stairs when a hand closed around my arm. I closed my eyes, bracing for the anger, instead I was engulfed in his arms, pulled into my safe place.

  “Before you ask, I’m still not mad,” Briggs whispered to the top of my head, “but you can only deny it so long. Your gorgeous eyes sparkle when you look at me and you’re face gives you away every time. So, keep lying to yourself, tell yourself that you aren’t in love with me, but I know better. You want to stay here, you want me to love you, but keep denying it. I’ll wait as long as you need.” Briggs pulled away, kissing my head, and walked back toward the kitchen. I stared at the place he disappeared from and willed myself to move. I wanted to force my legs to chase after him, to throw myself into him and tell everyone in the room how much I love him. Instead, I stood there like an idiot. Everyone leaves.

  Eventually, the party joined me in the living room in front of the tree. No one mentioned my breakdown in the kitchen or Briggs’s declaration of love. We just exchanged gifts and played with the kids. George settled in my lap with a ball that lit up and Briggs took up residence on the couch behind me, pulling me so I sat against his knees. Beck’s gift was the most thoughtful present I had ever been given, so maybe the guy wasn’t a complete ass. Rae and Nick got me a new tapestry and I got them a photo album of baby George. I got Faye new playing cards and a shawl. I got Briggs a new subscription to his notebooks so he would never run out and an engraved pen with his name on it. His other gift would have to wait until everyone was gone. I got Jovie and Cori gift cards for new scissors and they got me new handmade candles.

  Everyone cleared out around lunch and Briggs and I were left alone by the dying fire. Murphy had his head in my lap, snoring loudly. I was still propped against Briggs’s legs and his hand rested gently on my shoulder. I knew I had hurt him. I had essentially denied him in front of everyone important to me and his family. “Your present is upstairs.” Briggs stood up and left me sitting on the floor. “Second door on the right.” He called over his shoulder. I wiggled out from under Murphy and made my way to the second floor. Passing his room, I turned the door knob to the second door on the right. Morticia bolted out, rubbing my legs and meowing. My art was hanging on the walls and an easel was set up by the window. A bookshelf was paired with a deep red over-sized chair and a lamp. There were twenty-one books on the shelf. The same twenty-one books he had read with me during our note exchange. A cat tree was propped in the corner with a litterbox in the open closet. Candles and trinkets from my apartment lined a shelf under the books, and my doorknobs were hanging from the curtain rod.

  There was no stopping the tears or the sobs that hit me. It was no wonder I had terrible Karma. I was a terrible person. I found an amazing man who loved me. He loved me so much that he asked me to move in with him, invade his space and his family. Then I crushed him by not returning it. I looked around the room one more time before running down the hall and taking the stairs two at a time. I found Briggs alone in front of the tree. Wrapping paper still littered the floor and I stepped over it to wind my arms around his waist and rest my head between his shoulder blades.

  “Knowing that I did all that for nothing is pretty rough. But then knowing that if you stay it’s because I forced you to is worse.” He just stood with his hands in his pockets and my head pressed into his back.

  “Everyone I have ever cared about has left me. Rae, Carmen, Mom, Blake. Even my father left before I was born. No one, other than Rae, has ever given a shit about me.” I felt Briggs slump slightly before he turned and took my face in his hands. His chocolate eyes stared into mine until I couldn’t take it anymore and focused on his shirt. “Thank you.” Briggs tipped my head back up and pressed his lips to mine softly.

  “I know I’ve fucked up. I know you don’t trust me to not lie to you, but I do give a shit about you. I’ve never given more shits in my life.” Briggs winked and I giggled. “You take all the time you need,
but I love you. You can believe me, or you can wait and see that time doesn’t mean a damn thing.”

  “I’ll stay. Not because you forced me. I want to. I want to be here with you and Faye. Not necessarily Beck, but definitely you.” I stood on my toes and kissed him with as much force as I could muster. I wasn’t prepared to declare my undying love to him, but I could accept his. Our kiss lingered, turning more heated and making me desperate to get closer. Briggs backed us up to the couch and covered my body with his, caging me in.

  I got lost in his coffee eyes for a moment before his hand slid up my shirt and he kissed down my neck. “You are so fucking beautiful.”

  “Language, Briggs!” Faye’s voice had me scrambling to get out from under Briggs, but he just laughed. Faye giggled, shuffling over to the arm chair, and settling down next to the tree. With another hard kiss, Briggs let me out from under him, but pulled me into his lap. “When Martin was alive, Christmas was the only time I could enjoy. He gave me that gift every year. One day with no aggression, no fighting. It was lovely. It was nice to have a house full of people today, nice to feel all the love like that again.” Faye leaned her head back and closed her eyes, deep in thought. Briggs, whispered a quiet “thank you” against my neck and my eyes fluttered closed. Christmas was perfect. My friends were better than family. Loving and loyal. All the things I never got to experience in my actual family, I was gifted by the family I created. Briggs was right, I did love him, and it had taken far less than a month to do so.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Briggs

  Harriet silenced her phone, shifting again before settling back in my lap. From my view point, I could see the two-inch wide strip of paper she was using as a book mark. I didn’t mess with her notes, I knew better, but I really wanted to. I really wanted to read them and use them help figure her out. I wasn’t breaking her trust again though. Instead, I stole moments like those to read them. Her curvy, elegant handwriting made my chest warm. In two months or so, we had come a long way from paying the bus driver to deliver notes.

  Pick up artichokes, call Shannon about watching girls, need lavender oil for candles.

  Our dinner party had just cleared out and it was so nice to just relax with my girl and my dog. Murphy snored softly from his place at Harriet’s feet and the cat was curled on the couch. We had hosted two dinners since Christmas. My girl got a serious high out of cooking for people so I let her cook. All our friends were mutual, so it was always pleasant. The kids played in the yard with Murphy, Ma got to cook with Harriet, and we all had a blast. I had never been social, never had friends that weren’t Beck’s friends, but thanks to Harriet, I had them. I had tagged along with Ewan before, but his old college buddies weren’t my thing, and I worked out with Griffin, but our relationship was strictly for the gym. With Harriet, she arranged the meals, did the shopping and was a gracious hostess. She even asked me repeatedly if I minded her little parties. I was on the verge of putting it in writing and signing in blood that I did not mind. To be honest, I loved it, but I asked her to stay so she would live with me, not play houseguest. I wanted her to feel at home, but Harriet wouldn’t even decorate. Even the room I turned into her studio hadn’t been changed.

  She closed her book and tossed it on the floor, rolling to look up at me. “Pool?” The more frequent the phone calls, the more restless Harriet got. I gestured her to get up off the floor and stood, pulling her up by the hand into me. I tucked her inky-black hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead.

  “I love you.” I made a point to tell her as often as possible, hoping she would eventually believe me, but I never got it in return. It stung, but again, I could wait. I’d wait forever. Harriet hummed an acknowledgement and I lead her down the hall.

  Harriet turned on the stereo system and tossed Murphy a bone before racking the balls. I motioned for her to break while she chalked her cue and I stared shamefully. Her blue skirt brushed the floor around her bare feet and the tight gray shirt left little to the imagination. My girl was perfect. The subtle curves of her pert tits went straight to my cock, making me need to adjust my jeans. Everything about her was so dainty, but the woman was fierce.

  “Earth to Briggs.” Harriet snapped her fingers, smirking with a pink tinge to her cheeks. She could read my mind and started backing toward the door slowly. Fuck pool, I wanted a game of chase and Harriet was going to deliver. I stalked toward her slowly at first, watching the smirk on her face turn into wide-eyes and a full smile. Instead of bolting out the door, she closed it and turned the lock. When I made it to her, I caged her in, bracing myself on the door. Her tongue darted out to wet her full lips and I was done. My mouth hit hers hard, and I groaned at her flavor. I would never get enough of it. Her earthy smell invaded me when I nuzzled into her neck to lick along the line of her pulse.

  “Where were you running?” I ground myself into her and my girl whimpered.

  “Just to lock the door.” She was breathless, panting, while I stroked my thumb over her nipple. I shoved off the door and took her hand, leading her to the pool table and sitting her ass on it.

  “Good. You wouldn’t get far anyway.” I inched her skirt up, lightly caressing her legs as I went before I pulled her shirt over her head. I had to step back to look her over before I kept going. Harriet topless with her skirt up to her caramel thighs was beyond sexy. Her hand went to my face and she coaxed me closer, raking her nails through my beard. Without warning, I jerked away from her and crouched to run my tongue from her knee to her thighs. She gasped when I went straight for her pussy, dragging my tongue over it before spreading her knees wider. Harriet’s hands went to my hair and I nibbled her clit, making her body tremor. My fingers joined my mouth, gliding in and out of her smoothly, while my tongue circled her clit. She was moaning my name in a matter of seconds.

  My fly was unzipped and I was ready to go before Harriet stopped trembling. I pulled her ass toward me and eased into her slowly, reveling in how tight she gripped me, how perfectly we fit. “Damn, I love you.” It came out as a groan and when I didn’t get an answer, I hastened my pace. My hands roamed her, sinking my fingertips into the soft flesh of her hips and gently squeezing her breasts. I started slamming into her, skin slapping and breaking out in a sweat. Her body arched off the table and I watched her face turn to complete bliss, nails scratching at the felt on the table. The sensation shot through me, going down my spine and to my balls as I saw stars. I slumped to brace myself on the table, panting, and noted the sated look on her face. Harriet was happy, content, but wouldn’t just admit she loved me, that we were something amazing. I met her gaze and stared into her amazing dark eyes for a moment before pushing up and fixing her skirt.

  “Do you still want to get married someday?” Harriet pulled the discarded shirt back over her head. The question startled me. I had told her everything about Penny and she told me about Blake. Not that she expected Blake to last, but he was just one more person to betray her trust and leave her when she needed them.

  “Yeah, I do. All the kids in the house may change my mind about those too.” I zipped my pants, helping her off the table. “You?”

  “I love kids, but I would never want any child to grow up like I did. I don’t believe in marriage, though. I don’t need a piece of paper telling me I can only be with that person. I don’t need the law to condone my partner.” Harriet shrugged and kissed my chin.

  “Don’t believe in marriage? I don’t understand.” I sat back on the leather sofa and Harriet laid her head back in my lap. What the hell does that even mean?

  “It’s like the government is giving you the go-ahead to be with someone. It’s silly. The divorce rate is a testament to the fact that the institution of marriage is asinine.” I couldn’t help but laugh at her. Harriet had a screwed-up life and I knew that, but to not believe in giving your life to a soulmate, to shun the declaration of love for another person, was strange.

  “So, even if you did fall in love with someone, you wouldn’t get
married?” The way Harriet looked at me, the smile on her face, told me she loved me. If only the words would come out of those sweet lips.

  “I guess it would depend on how important it was to them. I mean if I were to fall in love and trust someone with a commitment like that, and he said it was really important to him, I would do it. The idea would still seem silly and outdated to me, but relationships take compromise. Right?” Harriet rolled toward my stomach and closed her eyes.

  “I guess they do. Give and take.” I slouched back, keeping my eyes on her face, and finding her hand with mine. I was a clingy guy and didn’t give a shit. With my brother being after her originally, her not returning my profession of love, and her attack, I was never letting her go. It was hard enough leaving her at work daily, so when we were home, Harriet was all mine.

  I looked away when her phone rang from the side table, but the ID didn’t say Carmen, it said “Blake”. Harriet silenced it and gave me a tentative look. What the hell? Before I could even ask, the doorbell rang and she lifted her head to let me leave from our place in the game room. The call from her lousy ex was not going unnoticed though. I ran to the door just as the bell chimed again and Beck met me at the bottom of the stairs looking sleepy. I jerked the door open to reveal a woman fidgeting with her purse strap. Black hair covered her face until she moved her black eyes up to me.

  “Oh, I’m looking for Harriet Wolfe. I’m her sister.” Carmen was taller than Harriet with a heavier build and was wearing tons of makeup. I stepped aside to let the woman in and caught my brother’s eye. We shared a silent conversation and I closed the door and locked it, turning back to come face to face with the barrel of a gun. Beck shook his head and Carmen moved the gun to him. “Great, now we are all on the same page. I need to speak to my sister and I need to do it now. Unless you want to point me to the money she’s hiding.” Beck and I looked at each other, then back at the crazy bitch with the gun. Money? Harriet had a decent job and worked odd jobs just because, but there wasn’t money under my mattress. When we didn’t answer, Carmen pressed the metal against my forehead.