RECKLESS (Nash's Story) (RECKLESS series Book 2)

by Ella Col

  “Of?” Reece cocks her eyebrow.

  “Of screwing up.”

  “I was scared…with Caydon. When you feel so strongly for someone, it’s insanely frightening. But you know what is more frightening? Losing that person because you are scared.” Reece speaks from experience.

  “You’re a very wise woman,” I compliment her.

  “And you are wise for listening.” She laughs.

  “Do you think you and Caydon will ever make a bigger commitment?”

  Reece shrugs and then sighs. “I’ve spent so much time away from my dad that right now I’m just enjoying living in my childhood home. I spend a lot of time with Caydon at his apartment, so I guess I have the best of both worlds. Eventually, my dad and Annalisa will get married. When that happens, I’m sure Caydon and I will make it official.”

  We sip our tea and eat our sandwiches, talking to each other for hours. It feels nice and comforting. This is what true friendship feels like.

  ***

  NASH

  I’ve been putting extra hours in at the gym. Jamie has been working her ass off, trying to scrounge up money to decorate our apartment for when she moves in next week. I want to provide for her. I want to make her dreams come true.

  As I’m cleaning up, I hear the front door of the gym open. Fuck. I forgot to lock it.

  “We’re closed!” I yell from the back of the gym.

  “So, this is where you’ve been working?” My dad stands in the middle of the gym looking around and trying to hide his disgust.

  “Yep,” I answer dryly. “What can I do for you, Dad?”

  “You haven’t been home in months. Your mother is worried about you.”

  “Well, now you can tell her that you saw me, and I’m fine.”

  “You haven’t asked for money, either.” My dad is surprised.

  “Because I don’t need your money. I have my own.” I don’t have much. What I do have is mine.

  “Where are you living?” he continues his interrogation.

  “Why do you want to know?” Something is suspicious.

  “You’re my son. I have the right to know.”

  “It shouldn’t matter to you. You’re not paying for it. I am.” What’s with the twenty questions?

  “Hannah gave me an interesting tidbit. She said you were moving in with her cousin. I think her name is Jamie.”

  Hannah strikes again.

  “First of all, stop listening to Hannah. She’s a conniving little bitch. And yes, I’m moving in with her cousin. Who…by the way…isn’t really her cousin. Tell me that you didn’t know that Hannah’s the daughter of her dad’s mistress.” I know the smug bastard isn’t beneath keeping Hannah’s dad’s secrets. I’m sure he has some of his own.

  “Kevin, it’s not wise to intrude on another family’s confidences. Hannah was raised just as you were…privileged. My concern is about you. Jamie has had her problems,” my father warns me. I wish he would’ve warned me about Hannah.

  “I don’t want to hear it, dad. She’s a good person…better than most.” I know Jamie. I may not know her past, but I know our future.

  “She was in rehab for quite some time, Kevin, when she was a teen.”

  Like that’s a big deal. It was the norm for wealthy families to send their wild child teens to rehab if they got a little out of hand. It was the ‘thing’ to do. The teens would come back cured and focused.

  “And?”

  “You don’t know what type of problem she had.”

  “Neither do you.”

  My dad sticks his hands in his suit pockets. He examines the gym again. “Be careful, Kevin.”

  My dad begins to exit the gym. I can’t help but call after him. “You haven’t asked about the competition.”

  He gazes over his shoulder. “I’m not going to,” he says coldly and walks out the door.

  Under my breath, I whisper to myself, “Training is going great. You would be proud of me.”

  I almost break down but don’t. Thank god for small favors. Mark skips through the front door. Damn, I should have locked that fucking door an hour ago.

  “What’s up?” I ask.

  “I forgot my gym bag.” He points to the bag lying again the far left wall. “Who was the guy who just left?”

  “My dad.” I try to say without emotion, but it creeps up in the back of my throat.

  “Let me guess…it didn’t go well.”

  “He came here to warn me about Jamie,” I snicker. “When he didn’t ask about my training and competition, I pointed it out. He stated clearly that he will never ask about it.”

  Mark puts his hand on my shoulder. “That guy will always be your father. He just may never be your dad. He’s a destructive force in your life. Don’t let that stop you from being the man I see in you. You do your best. Whatever you do in life, do it to the best of your ability. Be proud of how far you’ve come. I know I am.”

  I put my hand over Mark’s hand. “Thanks, man. I needed that.”

  “Anytime.” He smirks and leaves me with my thoughts.

  I need to go home. And home is where Jamie is.

  ***

  Jamie

  The only downfall of Nash entering the competition is his Saturday morning routine. Instead of wasting the day away in bed, we’re up at seven and at the gym by eight.

  I decided the best way to support Nash is to make the effort to be as healthy as he is. That means no more pot. No more French fries. And no more salt. All of my favorite things…but Nash is worth it, so I’ll take one for the team.

  Saturdays used to be a thing of beauty. Now Saturdays are making the decision of whether to bail on boxing or not. No, no, no. I must be supportive.

  I must be tough. I am getting so strong. I can’t break the good streak now.

  When we get to the gym, Nash wraps my hands for me. “You look fucking adorable.”

  I look down at my gym attire and mummified hands. I stick my hands up in the air. “I look like a mummy.”

  Nash kisses my nose. “Well, I think you look hot. Go get all sweaty for me.”

  As I walk past Nash, he pats my butt. I glance at him over my shoulder and wink. I love that boy.

  Feeling loved and perfect, I trot to my beginner’s class.

  I pick a bag in front, by the instructor, and after some basic stretches she has the class line up on the outside of the bags. And the torture begins with laps, high knees, kicks, bunny hops, frog walking, and butt kicks. After a quick sprint I return to my bag and put on my gloves. And the fun begins.

  While my instructor kicks my ass, I think of a juicy hamburger. I may not be a champ like Nash, but I’m going to eat like one. Yeah, I’m going to stuff my face when I’m done with this suffering.

  As I fantasize about my love affair with beef, I hear a racket of commotion stirring from the far gym area. I recognize the voice. Nash.

  I take my gloves off quickly as I can and throw them down. My feet propel forward looking for him. And then I see her. Hannah.

  Nash is doing everything he can to get her to leave. The smug bitch’s feet are planted to the ground. She’s not going anywhere.

  “What are you doing here, Hannah?” I’m petrified. She has that look on her face. The look like she is about to start a war.

  Of course, she is decked out in her favorite color, Puke Pink. It’s her power color.

  “I have the information that you want.” Hannah is toying with me. I know it.

  Nash is confused. “What, Hannah? What do you have?”

  Hannah is so pleased with herself. It’s sickening. “Jamie knows what I have.”

  Nash looks at me. “What in the hell is she talking about?”

  I’m like a deer in headlights. I can’t speak. It’s exactly how I feared it would go down. Me. Unprepared.

  Shit. How can you prepare yourself for something like this?

  How about by telling Nash the truth?

  Seeing that I can’t speak, Nash does it for me. “Get
on with it, Hannah. We don’t have time for your shit.” Nash is cold.

  From her purse, she pulls out a photo of a child…possibly my child. Dark skin. Dark hair. “Recognize him, Jamie? Oh wait…you couldn’t possibly remember him because you never even saw him until now.”

  It’s funny. I always thought that I would recognize him right away. I was so sure that he would have my eyes. The child in the photo looks just like every other child I have ever seen on television or advertisements. There’s no connection. I don’t know him. I don’t know my own child. He looks just like any other five-year-old boy.

  Still, the thought it is possibly him, and Hannah has his information is crippling. I fall to my knees. I begin to sob.

  “Who the fuck is that?” Nash questions. “What’s going on?”

  “Oh, he doesn’t know? I figured you would have told him by now. After all, you claim to be in love with him. I mean…you are living together. You should know everything about each other by now.” Hannah is finding way too much pleasure in this. “What’s the matter, Jamie? Cat got your tongue?”

  She’s laughing. Hannah finds the entire situation amusing. There is pure joy dispersing throughout her body. Evil bitch.

  Nash’s eyes are wide with fear and ignorance. He tries scooping me from the floor. I just can’t get up.

  “Is that him?” I whisper, wanting so desperately for the photo to be my child. In my heart, I know it’s not. It’s just Hannah’s evil plan to rip my happiness away for something so stupid.

  Hannah would have had to dig deep and ask my parents way too many intimate details of what happened after she ruined my life. Even Hannah doesn’t have the balls for that.

  My parents are determined to keep this little secret hidden forever. They would never tell anyone anything.

  Nash grabs the photo. He examines it for a second and throws it in Hannah’s face.

  “Hannah…leave,” Nash says quietly…almost too quietly.

  “Oh, I don’t want to miss this,” Hannah says like she’s already won.

  “Fucking leave!” Nash completely loses it. His veins are popping out all over his body. I’ve never seen his face so red. He keeps screaming for her to leave. The longer she stands there, the closer he gets to her. Finally, he’s just inches from her face when he screams again, “Leave!”

  Hannah is frightened. I’m sure she thinks he will hurt her. Reluctantly, she walks backwards toward the door.

  Once she is gone, Nash looks to the floor where I’m still lying. He puts his strong arms on my shoulders and lifts me to a standing position.

  I still can’t see through my tears when Nash lifts me again into his arms and carries me all the way home. Our home.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  NASH

  A baby. A fucking baby. Jamie had a fucking baby. At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what went down at the gym. Jamie hasn’t spoken since I’ve brought her home. Our home. A home where I thought all of the lies and secrets weren’t welcome. Well, damn, here they are knocking on my door again.

  There’s this nagging thought in my head. ‘Those who declare that there are to be no secrets at all from each other are headed into big trouble.’ How can I be mad about Jamie having a child before she knew me?

  I sit next to her on our bed. I don’t touch her because I can’t. I don’t know why I can’t, and this bothers me.

  “You are going to have to talk to me eventually,” I say in a low voice.

  Jamie pulls the blanket up under her breasts. “I don’t know where to begin.”

  “How about…I have a fucking kid?” I slew at her. Dick.

  “I don’t.” She sounds defeated. “He was taken away from me.”

  “Because you went to rehab?” I accuse. Nice. Asshole.

  “Yep. But I wasn’t in rehab because I had problems with drugs or alcohol,” Jamie sniffles. “My parents kept me there for nine months. Do the math, Nash.”

  “What?” They locked her away. What the…

  “You heard me,” she begins. “When my parents found out that I was pregnant, they hid me in rehab so their precious family and friends wouldn’t find out. They couldn’t possibly have a sixteen-year-old daughter who was pregnant. On the other hand, having a sixteen-year-old wild child on drugs is so much more acceptable.”

  “Wait a minute.” I pinch the bridge of my nose. “They sent you away?”

  Jamie dead eyes me. “Nash, not only did they send me away, but they took my baby from me. They sold my baby to a loving, happy couple.” Her tone is sarcastic.

  “I think you need to explain.” I don’t give Jamie an option. “In depth. I want to know everything, Jamie. Everything.”

  A single tear slides down her cheek. “Hannah and I were close. We had a love of purses, shoes, and boys. The summer of my sixteenth birthday, I met a boy. His family was vacationing at the lakes. I was infatuated with him, Nash. I loved him the way only a sixteen-year-old girl could love a boy.” Jamie pauses. “At first, we spent a lot of time together with our little group of vacationing kids. We did the normal stuff…drinking on the beach, late night talks in the light of a bonfire. So Hannah didn’t have a problem with it. Besides, she was ‘in love’ with Caydon and you. Kennedy and I…” I cut her off.

  “Kennedy?” I ask. Jamie saying his name makes me jealous.

  “Yes, Kennedy,” Jamie continues. “He and I started to branch off to our own little party. We enjoyed spending time alone.”

  Jamie looks off to a dreamy place. “Kennedy was perfect. He was attentive and a gentleman. And no matter how hard Hannah flirted with him, he never looked her way. Never.” Smart guy.

  I know where this is going. Hannah doesn’t like to be ignored.

  “Obviously, by the end of the summer, Kennedy and I were having sex. Unprotected sex. It was stupid…I know. But we were serious, and I loved him.” Ouch.

  “One night…my parents and I were having a late vacation night dinner. I was late getting to the bonfire. When I finally showed up, Hannah was drunk and trying everything she could do to get Kennedy to hook up with her.”

  This story sounds way too familiar. I don’t mean to snicker, but I do.

  “He kept pushing her away. But she wouldn’t take the hint. Finally, her ass landed in the sand.” Jamie giggles. She’s reliving that moment. “Hannah was mortified, embarrassed, and rejected.”

  Every fool knows not to reject Hannah or you will have hell to pay.

  “Our relationship was different after that, for two reasons.” Jamie takes a deep breath. “I didn’t trust her around Kennedy. The second was that she was jealous of my relationship with Kennedy. And she was jealous of me.”

  “This all sounds like Hannah.” I don’t disagree with Jamie.

  “Anyway, Hannah overheard my conversation with Kennedy while we were talking on the beach one night. She must have followed us while we were walking. The summer was ending, and I had just found out that I was pregnant.” Jamie begins to cry.

  “Kennedy and I had a plan. It wasn’t the best plan in the world, but it was ours. We were going to try to keep the baby. He was going to tell his parents so they could reason with mine.” Jamie looks to the floor and lets her tears drop. “None of that happened because of Hannah.”

  I should comfort Jamie. I should do something. Again, I’m useless. “What did Hannah do?”

  “What. Did. Hannah. Do,” Jamie grinds out. “Before Kennedy had the chance to tell his parents…before I could tell mine…Hannah told them both. Kennedy and I never stood a chance. Neither did my baby.

  “My parents care about status and appearance. They paid Kennedy’s parents for their silence. Kennedy’s parents whisked him off in the middle of the night.” Jamie is choking with grief. “As for me, they conjured up a story for their friends at home that I partied way too much on vacation. They were worried about me so they shipped me off to a rehab center across the country.”

  “How did they do that?” I can’t believe Jamie’s p
arents were able to pull this off.

  “Money talks and bullshit walks, Nash. I was under restriction at the rehab center until I delivered. Even then, no one told me the fate of my baby boy,” Jamie cries.

  The feeling of dread begins in the pit of my belly. Whatever happened to him couldn’t have been good. “What happened to your baby?”

  “My parents didn’t just give my baby up for adoption. They actually sold him to a couple who didn’t want to go through a lengthy adoption process. My baby is out there, and I will never find him because it was done illegally.”

  “Shit.” I don’t know what to say.

  “I never intended for you to get involved in any of this, Nash. It set Hannah off. And now she is torturing me.”

  “Yeah, well, now I’m involved, Jamie. And I don’t want to be. I’m tired of the fucking lies and secrets.”

  I grab my jacket that is hanging up next to the front door. I need to get out of here. The room feels so small and stuffy. My skin is itching to get out.

  “Where are you going?” Jamie is terrified.

  “I got to get out of here, Jamie. I need to process all of this.” I look over my shoulder and slam the door.

  I leave Jamie crying and alone in our bed. Pussy.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  I left my heart open for Jamie. Open. Gaping. Ready.

  Ready for what? More lies? More secrets?

  After loving Hannah, I doubted that there were true and honest relationships. When I met Jamie, I thought all of that was behind me. Clearly, I was wrong.

  Then again, how could I possibly be upset with her over her past?

  What I am experiencing is very immature…retroactive jealousy. Basically, I can’t get past that another guy’s genetic material was floating around in Jamie’s womb.

  So, what do I do?

  Who should I blame? Or should I forget about it? Do I have the right to judge her? Worst of all, is this relationship contaminated?

  Like many years before, I find myself in front of the gym. It’s where I need to be right now. It’s the one place where there are no secrets, no lies, and no drama.