Alien

by David Michael Slater

  officially starts tomorrow and goes through the weekend.”

  “Okay, but what is it?”

  “Well, they’d have presentations from experts, and panel discussions, maybe shows and sales, lots of sales — of things people made, of anything related to aliens: from t-shirts to alien language books to ‘authentic moon rocks’ to — whatever.”

  “I want a tumbleweed shaped like a flying saucer,” Theo said.

  “This is why Dad booked us here,” Maddie realized.

  “And I think we have a pretty good idea of who Dad wants his friend to interview tomorrow,” Max said, gesturing at the mingling aliens. “Perfect back- ground material for ‘Monstrous Lies with Marcus Mattigan.’”

  Maddie thought about this for a moment. “Guess

  what else we have,” she said. “What?” her brothers asked. “A plan.”

  CHAPTER FOUR

  The Plan, Part I

  The next morning, Maddie climbed out from un- der her covers on the couch that she’d been stuck with and tiptoed to the queen bed just a few feet away.

  “Max,” she whispered, shaking him by the shoul- der. It was 8 a.m., but the hotel room was still dark because of the blackout curtains. Her thicket of hair was morning wild. Her brothers’ Mattigan Messes — Theo’s curls and Max’s shaggy mop — spilled all over their pillows.

  “Hrmmm” Max murmured.

  “This is your first spy-signment!”

  Max bolted upright. Theo grumbled next to him, but did not wake up. Marcus grunted like Bigfoot in

  the other bed, but he didn’t wake up, either.

  Maddie sighed as Max snuck into the bathroom to get dressed. When he came out, he got down on the floor and pulled his spy kit out from under the bed. It was his dad’s old briefcase. Now, it held Max’s spy-nocular, a cheap, motion-sensor alarm system, his spy-nifying glass, a Swiss Army knife, a stethoscope, and an invisible-ink pen and decoder. While her brother prepared his spy supplies, Maddie slipped her father’s keys off the dresser.

  Then Max and Maddie snuck out of the room and silently rode the elevator down to the lobby. They headed toward the casino’s front entrance, but along the way they both got distracted by the buzzing and plinging and ringing all around them.

  Lights blinked. Video screens flashed. There were

  groans and cheers from all directions.

  People were sitting at machines tapping buttons. They were sitting at tables rolling dice and holding cards and moving chips. Max and Maddie stood there, turning slowly in circles, taking it all in. The ET-Con

  party had distracted them last night. They’d been too tired to notice the spectacle of gambling.

  “Who are these people?” brother and sister asked

  each other at exactly the same time.

  They stood and watched some more, mesmerized. Something was seriously wrong with this scene.

  “They look like aliens,” Max said, after observing a blank-faced old lady tap the same button on a slot machine about 200 hundred straight times, with- out moving a single other part of her body. “Actually, not aliens: zombies.”

  “Is this what happens when you gamble?” Mad- die wondered aloud. “Is this why they say ‘what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas’?”

  “Hey, there, you two!” someone called, startling the kids. It was an enthusiastic someone with a very pleasant voice. Max and Maddie looked away from the zombies to see a rosy-cheeked woman smiling at them. She had attractive blue eyes and the whitest teeth they’d ever seen. On her very fancy dress was a nametag that said, “Hostess.”

  “Hi!” both Max and Maddie said back. Neither of them ever spoke in such a chipper tone. Something about this woman just brought it out of them.

  “You two look like you might enjoy two free ten-dollar cards for the Fun Zone!” the woman said. “Whaddaya say? It’s right there.” She pointed to a large, open enclosure just beyond the zombies. “Want to take a peek?” she asked. “No strings attached. To- tally free!”

  “Well, okay, I guess,” Maddie said. “We’ll just have a quick look.” And before they knew it, she and Max were following the charming lady across the lob- by and into the Fun Zone.

  “Ta-da!” the hostess said, opening her arms wide so they could take in all the new flashing and beeping and video noise.

  It was overwhelming, and Max and Maddie both sensed that something, once again, wasn’t right.

  “Beautiful, isn’t it?” the lady asked. “Like a

  dream world, where you can get away from it all.”

  “Wait a minute,” Max said. “Where are all the

  actual games?”

  “What do you mean?” the lady asked, smiling at him with a smile so large he thought her pretty face might fall off. “It’s wall-to-wall games in here!”

  “These aren’t games,” Maddie said, seeing what her brother saw now. “Look, in that one, you just hope the wheel stops on your color. It’s exactly like roulette. Which is gambling. And in that one, you drop a token in, just hoping others will fall off the shelf and give you more tokens. So you can just put them back in and hope to win more. Where are the arcade games where you actually get to play something? These

  — these are — ”

  “For training kids how to be zombies when they grow up,” Max said. “They give you the free card to lure you in.”

  The lady’s smile was gone now. Her friendly face had vanished. “You aren’t normal children,” she hissed.

  “True story.”

  “Hey, there, you two!” the lady called, smiling wide again. She’d spotted another pair of kids and headed right for them.

  “Let’s get out of here,” Max said.

  “Right!” Maddie agreed. “What were we doing,

  anyway?”

  After shaking themselves out of their daze, Max and Maddie rushed out of the Fun Zone and then right out of the casino. They hurried through the parking lot to the Yuck.

  “Um — ” Max said as his sister looked to see if anyone was watching — no one was — and then quickly unlocked the rear door of the Fifth Wheel for him.

  “No,” Maddie said, reading her brother’s mind, “in Nevada you cannot be back here while the Yuck is moving. But in Oregon — Dad’s been wrong about this — it turns out you are allowed, if there is commu- nication possible with the driver. I looked it all up last night on my phone.”

  “But — ”

  “Hold on.”

  Maddie dove into the Yuck, then emerged with one of Max’s walkie-talkies. “Here,” she said. “The other one’s under Dad’s seat. If there’s an emergency, use it. We have Oregon plates, so I’m sure that if Dad gets pulled over, and they find you in the camper, they’ll understand — if you say we all thought the laws were the same.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  Maddie Eyeballed Max. “Nothing, what’s wrong with you?”

  “It’s just — ”

  “It’s the best we can do, Max. Do you have a better idea?”

  “No, it’s just — ”

  “What? It’s just what?”

  “It’s just that Dad’s always saying the world’s full

  of fakers and fraudsters. Aren’t we —?”

  “Look,” Maddie sighed. She was doing an awful

  lot of sighing on this trip. “I don’t feel great about it, either, but think about it this way: Why do liars and cheaters lie and cheat?”

  “To get things they didn’t earn.”

  “Exactly.

  Is that what we’re doing?”

  “No. Not at all.”

  “It matters why you do what you do. I’m sure the best spies have to cut some corners, every once in a while, to catch the worst criminals. You can’t make an omelet if you don’t break a few eggs.”

  “Teachable Moment?”

  “Teachable Moment.”

  “That’s pretty good,” Max admitted. “You’d make a pretty go
od spy, and a pretty good breakfast, too.”

  “Thank you. But please know that if anything happens to you, I will never, ever forgive myself. Your spy assignment is just that: spy. Find out where Dad goes, who he meets, what he does, and what he finds out. Text me in real time. Come back in one piece.

  That’s it. Got it? What are you doing?”

  “Getting into my spy crouch.”

  “I guess you’re ready, then. In you go.”

  Maddie opened the door to the Fifth Wheel and Max crouched inside. She Eyeballed him a good one, just in case — even though he wasn’t looking — then locked him in tight. Then she let out a major-league sigh.

  After that, ignoring her aching stomach, she high- tailed it back to the casino.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  The Plan, Part II

  Maddie had just finished stuffing the extra pil- lows under Max’s side of the covers when her father sat up in his bed. His Mattigan Mess looked like electricity had shocked it.

  “You’re up already?” he whispered when he saw

  Maddie standing there with a hand on her gut.

  “Uh, yeah,” she whispered back. It was 8:25 a.m. She’d been planning to wake her dad in four minutes, exactly one minute before he normally got up in order to hit the ground running at nine.

  “Are you not feeling well? Why do you have my keys?”

  Maddie had forgotten to put them back on the dresser. Those zombies down in the casino had really thrown her off — and that creepy Fun Zone lady, too. And her “omelet” of fibs was making her feel like throwing up.

  “Because,” she stuttered, “I — I saw you starting to wake up a few minutes ago, and — and I think we need to sleep in — after all that driving. Your keys fell on the floor, and I didn’t want you to have to search around for them and accidentally wake the boys.”

  “Oh, okay,” Marcus whispered. He climbed out of bed and took the keys. “That’s very thoughtful of you,” he added. “I’ll get dressed quietly and go grab some breakfast in the camper.”

  When he slipped into the bathroom, Maddie quickly texted Max a warning, then climbed back into her couch, hoping her father wouldn’t want to kiss them good-bye before he left.

  Marcus came out just two minutes later and approached the boys’ bed. He was definitely going to kiss them good-bye.

  Maddie held her breath. She didn’t know what to do. Then she heard her brother mutter something from under his covers. It sounded like, Histafistafoo!”

  “Oh!” Maddie said, after a moment of total con- fusion. She sat up and whisper-shouted, “Notta foot, notta fist, notta finger!” Her father was just starting to lean over the lump that wasn’t Max. “We’ll get along fine, Dad,” she promised. “Don’t wake them up. Good luck out there.”

  “Oklahoma,” Marcus agreed, straightening up. “Make sure you touch base with Nyota before you leave the room. Her cell number is on the dresser. I’ll be in touch.”

  And then he left. Or, he almost left.

  He had his hand on the doorknob when Maddie said, “Dad?”

  “Yes?”

  “Can I ask you something?”

  “Sure.” Marcus came back into the room a few

  steps.

  “I know this will sound crazy,” she said, stalling to make sure that Max had gotten himself hidden, but also because she was suddenly curious. “But just humor me, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  “Remember how you said you wouldn’t want to know if any of the creatures in that monster journal were real?”

  “Maddie, I threw that collection of nonsense away as soon as — ”

  “Remember how you said you wouldn’t want to know if any of them were real, because you wouldn’t want to change how you feel about your dad abandoning you as a kid to search for Mysterious Monsters?”

  “Sigh,” Marcus said. “Don’t tell me you’re starting to believe this silliness about an alien running around out there in the desert.”

  “No — of course not,” Maddie promised. “I’m only asking. I’m just saying — if it were true, would you want to know about it?”

  Marcus seemed to think about the question seri- ously for a moment. Then he said, “If you’re asking me, would I want to know if the entire world turned upside down and nothing made sense anymore? I’d guess I’d have to say, ‘thank you very much, but no.’”

  “Because of your dad?”

  “Yes,” Marcus admitted. “But also because of your mom.”

  “Mom?” Maddie gasped, her heart racing. They almost never talked about her mom anymore. They’d stopped about six months after her disappearance, which was a whole year ago. It just hurt too much.

  “If nothing makes sense anymore — if there are

  no rules — then I’ll never learn what happened to her.”

  “Okay, then,” Maddie said, holding back a giant

  sob. “We won’t tell you when we find the alien.”

  “Much appreciated,” Marcus said. His frown flipped to a smile, which made Maddie smile, too, if only for a moment.

  Her father slipped out of the room.

  Theo sat up when the door clicked shut. “That

  was a close one!” he said.

  “Too close for comfort, that’s for sure,” Maddie agreed, holding her stomach.

  CHAPTER SIX

  Fifth Wheel, Part I

  Max was looking around the Fifth Wheel, trans- forming it into a secret spy headquarters in his mind, when his phone buzzed. It was a text from Maddie.

  d coming 2 5 w! hide!

  Quickly, but calmly, Max hustled into one of the camper’s many little closets, the one with the “Monstrous Lies with Marcus Mattigan” TV show poster on it. Less than ten minutes later, he heard his dad climb inside.

  A few moments after that, there was a knock on

  the Fifth Wheel’s door, which Marcus opened.

  “Kirk!” Max heard his father say. “Glad you could make it! Come on in. I was just going to wolf

  down some cereal, but it’s early. How about joining me for an omelet?”

  “Sure,” the other man said. “Great to see you,

  Marcus.”

  Fanning himself in the hot little closet, Max listened to the men talk about the TV business while Marcus cooked up their breakfast. When they were done eating it, Marcus said, “Let’s film the call to the Air Force Base. I’m sure they’re getting flooded with reports of alien sightings, and I won’t get through. But you never know.”

  There was a pause, and then Kirk said, “Rolling.”

  “Voicemail,” Max heard his father grumble. Then, sounding more official, he said, “Hello, my name is Marcus Mattigan, host of ‘Monstrous Lies with Marcus Mattigan’. I hope you know my work. Please disregard the recent Internet nonsense about me having my children wandering the woods of Oregon looking for Bigfoot. That was a set-up, a poor attempt at revenge by a fraud I exposed on an episode of my show. Which brings me to why I’m calling…”

  Then he explained that he was in town to put an end to all the alien-escape rumors and left his number.

  “Well,” Marcus said, apparently done with the call, “let’s head out to the base and see if anyone there will talk to us in person.”

  “Sounds good.”

  The two men climbed out of the Fifth Wheel, and moments later, the Yuck started up. Drenched in sweat, sucking in air, Max fell out of the closet. He hadn’t realized he’d been holding his breath so much in there. His phone was in his hand, but he hadn’t even thought of using it as a recording device.

  He lay on his back, ashamed of himself.

  Some spy!

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  When in Outer Space

  “This is the best I could do on short notice,” Mad- die said, emptying a grocery bag onto the bed. Theo had fallen back asleep, so Maddie went down to the lobby again to do some shopping. She’d been afraid even to look at the zombies, so she
’d sprinted right past them to the casino shops.

  “What’s going on?” Theo muttered, sitting up and rubbing his eyes at the sudden light in the room. When he realized he was rubbing his eyes with Mei-mei, his old baby blanket, he quickly shoved it under his pil- low. No one knew he’d brought it. No one even knew he still had it. Luckily, Maddie was looking through all the junk she’d just dumped on him. “What is all this stuff?” he asked.

  There were some dorky sheets with spaceships on them, a bunch of make-up, hair bands, a roll of tinfoil, some weird sunglasses, and colored hairspray.

  “I also bought some peanut-butter-and-banana-sandwich fixings for you,” Maddie said. “And I called Nyota. She’s going to meet us downstairs, but we need to hurry. The conference starts at ten, and I’ve already picked out our first session.”

  She waved some sort of program at Theo, who slouched at the thought of sitting through classes in- stead of riding roller coasters and playing games.

  “I just hope we can get in without badges, or passes, or whatever.”

  “We’re gonna sneak in?”

  “I asked if there were still spots open, but it costs

  three hundred dollars to register for the conference.”

  “So we’re gonna sneak in?”

  Maddie sighed yet again. “I’m sorry, Theo,” she said. “This conference is a great opportunity to learn about the whole alien thing. I just can’t think of any

  other way to get us in. I don’t want you to think sneak- ing into things is okay, but sometimes, if you want to make an omelet you have to —”

  “Awesome!”

  “Oh. I should have known.”

  “So what’s all this junk for?”

  “Teachable Moment,” Maddie said: “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.”

  “What?”

  “Okay, when in Las Vegas, do as the Las Vegasites? Do.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”