Putting Boys on the Ledge

by Stephanie Rowe

  I jerked around, hoping it was Heath abandoning his date as soon as he noticed me. But it was Colin.

  Colin!

  Oh, my gosh. How totally embarrassing. I hadn't seen him since the kiss. What was I supposed to do? How was I supposed to act? I'd totally avoided the barn all week, and I'd thought I was safe.

  "Blue! How are you?" He caught up to me and settled in beside me, as if he were going to wait in line with me.

  It was a very long line.

  "Um...hi." I shifted and tried not to look at him.

  "What's wrong?"

  "Nothing."

  "Then why are you staring at my sneakers?"

  "I'm not."

  "Then you're staring at all the bubble gum stuck to the cement floor? I'm so flattered that's more interesting than looking at me."

  Jerk. Why did he have to be so demanding? I dragged my eyes off the ground and sort of looked at his face. He smiled, and his eyes sort of crinkled up in this really nice way. I couldn't help but smile back, and suddenly all the awkwardness was gone. It would be fine. "Hi, Colin. It's good to see you."

  And it was. A boy who wouldn't put me on The Ledge. He looked totally cute in his work boots and his gray hoodie. There were grass cuttings stuck to his shoe, and he smelled like fresh flowers and pine trees, as if he'd been working outside. He looked wonderful, not scary, and I realized I was so happy to see him.

  He touched my arm. "You okay? You were looking kinda sad."

  Oh, great. If Colin noticed I'd been on The Ledge, then Heath definitely would have too. "I stubbed my toe and it hurt. A lot."

  He lifted an eyebrow. "Did you really?"

  "Yes." I could tell he didn't believe me, and for a moment that felt good. With Colin, I didn't have to pretend I was someone I wasn't, partially because he could tell when I was lying, and partially because I wasn't trying to impress him. After all, he'd taught me how to kiss. How much more personal can you get?

  "So, how's Heath? Was he impressed with your...talents?"

  I felt my cheeks heat up. "Um... I... Um...haven't..."

  "You haven't kissed him yet?" Colin was looking pretty intently at me.

  "No," I admitted.

  "Why not?"

  "I haven't had the opportunity."

  "Uh-huh. So it's not that you shut him down again?"

  Why did Colin care? "I don't plan to say no."

  Colin nodded slightly, but he looked a little annoyed. "Well, you'd better plan to say no at some point with him or you'll find yourself in..."

  "In what?"

  "In a situation you don't want to be in."

  "How do you know what situation I want to be in?" I asked.

  Colin met my gaze. "Because I know you."

  "Oh." He seemed awfully certain, and I didn't really have the energy to challenge him.

  "Did you come here with Heath?" Colin asked as the line moved forward a few feet.

  Why was Colin obsessing about Heath? "No. I came with my friends and my family." Oh, smooth, Blue. Doesn't that make me sound like a suave and sophisticated diva? Not. It made me sound like a loser who spent Friday nights with her family.

  Once again, it was a good thing I wasn't trying to impress Colin. He somehow managed to see the real me all the time. I was definitely going to have to work on that. It was no way to attract boys. Then again, he'd been out at the mall with his sister on a Thursday night, so maybe he would understand about having to spend time with family. So, maybe, it was okay to admit it to him.

  "Well, I think you're about to have your chance to wow Heath with your talents," Colin said, "because he's on his way over here."

  "He is?" I almost whirled around to find Heath, then stopped myself. What was I doing? He'd put me on The Ledge. He didn't deserve my attention. Colin was the one who'd come up to me and was being nice to me. So I turned my back toward Heath and faced Colin. "So what? I'm talking to you."

  Colin lifted his eyebrow, then narrowed his eyes. "What game are you playing, Blue?"

  "I'm not playing a game. I just...well...we were supposed to have a date tonight and he never called, so I'm mad at him. I don't want him to think I..." Think what? That I was madly in love with him and would do anything for him?

  "Ah." Colin looked over my shoulder, then looked back at me. "Want some help making him feel bad for missing out on a date with you?"

  Help making Heath feel bad? "Sure."

  Colin nodded, then slung his arm around my shoulders and pulled me up against his side. "Pretend you like me."

  "I do like you." I fit just perfectly under his arm.

  Something flitted across his face. "Pretend you like me the way you like Heath."

  "Oh..."

  "Put your arm around me," he muttered.

  "Right." Was I an idiot or what? Colin was probably rolling his eyes at having to put up with me. I didn't even know how to act like a girlfriend! I tentatively sneaked my arm around him, and I could feel him suck in his breath as my hand settled on his waist. How intimate was this? It was actually sort of cool. I felt safe. Like I belonged to someone. Like if anyone tried to come after me, Colin would protect me. "Like this?"

  "Yeah." His voice sounded a little strangled. "Smile at me."

  I looked up at him and found him watching me. His eyes had this weird soft glow, like he was looking at a puppy or something that made him feel all good inside. I smiled. "Thanks, Colin."

  He grinned, and for the first time I noticed that he had a little dimple in his right cheek. "I'm having fun."

  "Me too." It was then that I realized Colin had some shadow on his cheeks too. "You shave?"

  He looked surprised. "Of course."

  "Can I touch?" I immediately wished I could be sucked into the ground. What a completely stupid comment. "I mean...I always wondered if it felt rough."

  Colin shrugged. "Go ahead."

  "Really?"

  "Just do it."

  "Never mind." This was too embarrassing. I mean, it was one thing to admit to a guy that you'd never kissed anyone before, but it was something else to be letting all your secrets out.

  Colin rolled his eyes, then grabbed my hand and pressed my fingers against his jaw.

  It was rough, almost prickly. "Huh." He let go of my wrist, and I rubbed my fingertips over his skin. "It's rough in one direction and smooth in the other."

  "Uh-huh." He had that weird strangled sound in his voice again.

  "It's cool." I dropped my hand. No longer was I a bumbling freshman. I was becoming more of a woman by the minute. "Thanks."

  Colin looked down at me and his eyes met mine. "You're welcome."

  I smiled. "For a boy, you're a pretty nice guy."

  "What's your real name?"

  I caught my breath. I never told anyone my real name. It was too embarrassing. But...this was Colin. He'd taught me how to kiss and knew I was out with my family on a Friday night. It was actually sort of nice that there was someone out there besides my friends whom I could be myself with. "Blueberry."

  He grinned. "Really?"

  "Horrible, isn't it?"

  Colin shook his head. "I think it's perfect." His voice was soft, almost tender, and he touched my cheek with his hand.

  I caught my breath. He had that expression on his face, the one Heath had had right before he'd tried to kiss me. My stomach did a little jiggle and I went still. Was Colin going to kiss me? In public? For a moment I really, really hoped so. Kissing him was magical... I lifted my face and—

  "Blue!" Heath's voice slammed into our moment. "Blue, is that you?"

  Colin's face darkened, and he looked up over my shoulder. "Hi, Heath."

  "Bradshaw," Heath said. "You here with Blue?"

  I twisted around so I could see Heath, and Colin tightened his arm around my shoulder. "Hi, Heath," I said.

  "Hey." Heath looked right at me and gave me one of those special smiles that made my stomach turn to goo. "I tried to call you this week, but I think you must have given me the wrong number.
I kept getting some pizza place."

  "Heard that line before." Colin snorted and began playing with my hair. It tickled, but felt so good. I wanted to snuggle closer to him and tuck myself under his arm even more. Why did it feel so good to have Colin touching me? I was with Heath, not Colin. I shifted slightly, forcing myself to pull away from Colin.

  For a moment, his arm tightened around me, and then he let go, dropping his arm to his side. I missed his arm instantly, but I lifted my chin to face Heath, refusing to let myself retreat into Colin.

  Heath glared at him before turning back to me. "Anyway, Blue, are you free tomorrow night?"

  "Tomorrow?" Oh, my gosh. Tomorrow? I had so little time to panic. "Sure."

  Heath grinned. "Great. I'll pick you up at seven."

  "How do you know where I live?" Didn't he have to call me or something?

  "You're in the phone book, aren't you?"

  "Oh. Right. Yes."

  Heath nodded. "See you then." He jerked his head at Colin. "Later."

  Colin muttered something back and Heath left. And I didn't see the girl with him anymore.

  Huh. Interesting.

  I had to tell my friends about the encounter. My most horrible evening had suddenly catapulted into ecstasy. "I'll see you around." I abandoned my quest for ice cream and turned to leave, only to be halted by Colin's hand on my arm.

  "He's lying."

  I looked at Colin. "What?"

  "He didn't call. The pizza place line? It's old."

  Some of my elation faded. "What are you talking about?"

  "If he can find your address in the phone book, why couldn't he look up your phone number?"

  I felt my shoulders sag. "Why are you doing this?"

  "Doing what?"

  "Trying to take away my good mood."

  His grip on my arm softened. "Sorry, Blue. I'm just trying to protect you from him."

  "Is that right?" I set my hands on my hips, trying not to let Colin's warning scare me. "What's wrong with Heath?"

  Colin shifted his weight before answering. "He lies."

  "Give me a break, Colin. I just got my cell phone two days before. I'm sure I wrote down the wrong number."

  Colin shook his head and let his hand drop from my arm. "He's an idiot, Blue. Just ask Theo."

  "Theo says he's a good guy. Plays basketball."

  "And that makes him a good guy?"

  "Well, it doesn't make him a bad guy." My stomach was starting to congeal into a hard little lump. I wasn't used to Colin being a jerk. Why was he trying to ruin my moment? "What's wrong with you?"

  "Me? Nothing. Are you going out with Heath tomorrow?"

  "Of course I am." How could I not? It was the best moment of my high school career.

  His eyes narrowed. "Well, have fun. And bring some pepper spray."

  "Why would I need pepper spray? Maybe I want him to kiss me."

  Colin just gave me an annoyed look and walked away. Without saying good-bye! Why had he turned into such a grouch? I don't know why girls have the reputation of being moody. Boys are definitely a whole lot worse.

  But Colin wasn't my problem. I had a date with Heath tomorrow.

  I skipped all the way back to my seat.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  My date with Heath was at seven o'clock, and I was a total disaster.

  I was so nervous I would have forgotten my makeup if Allie hadn't been there to put it on. And my hands were shaking so much that my hair would have been a total disaster too if it weren't for Natalie and Frances.

  After I apologized to Natalie for snapping at her about my cell phone on Friday night, we were good. Which was excellent, because I needed them.

  By the time I was ready, it was one minute before seven. Sixty seconds to spare. Phew!

  I stood in front of the mirror and inspected myself. Hair actually behaving, with enough body that you could see I had hair even if you were looking at me from the front. A pair of tight jeans and black boots, and a tank top that hugged my bust and showed a little skin.

  Allie couldn't wear tops like that or she'd pop right out. She said she was jealous of me because I could wear them. I suspected she was just trying to make me feel better and distract me from my nerves, but that was okay. I decided to believe her. I needed all the positive reinforcement I could get.

  A light tap sounded at my door, and my mom popped her head in. "Is that what you're wearing?"

  "Yes." Uh-oh. She was wearing black jeans. Probably because she's not all that happy about my first car date.

  "It sends the wrong message. Put something else on. And those jeans are too tight. Find something else."

  "But, Mom! He's a senior."

  "All the more reason. He needs to remember that you're fourteen."

  "Almost fifteen."

  Mom gave me the mom look. "You'll be fifteen in seven months."

  "So?"

  "Change your clothes."

  The doorbell rang and my stomach leaped into my throat. "He's here! I have to go. I don't have time to change."

  Mom grinned a very evil grin. "Oh, take your time. Your dad and I will keep him company until you're ready. Change your clothes or you're not leaving this house."

  Then she shut the door.

  Sometimes I really hate my parents.

  I heard my dad answer the door and greet Heath, and all hopes of a good evening shriveled up into nothing. Once Heath met my parents, I was doomed. He'd know I was a freak that matched my name.

  "You'd better get down there," Frances said. "I love your parents, but they really aren't going to help your social life."

  "What if your mom starts talking about those psychic-clarity herbs?" Natalie asked. "Or what if they ask if they can double-date with you guys?"

  I looked at her in horror. "They wouldn't!"

  "Wouldn't they?"

  Oh, my gosh. "You're right. They would!" I ran to my closet and started tearing sweaters off my shelves. Too short. Too heavy. Too summery. "Got it!" For once in my life, the clothes I wanted to wear were actually clean. I pulled the red cotton sweater over my head and threw my arms into the sleeves. Perfect. It had a high neck and the bottom came to the middle of my thighs.

  I had bought it for my stretch-pants phase, and it would serve the same purpose for the tight jeans.

  I ran into the room. "Okay?"

  "I take it that thing's coming off as soon as you get outside?" Allie asked.

  "You bet."

  "Then it's perfect. You look like a nun in it."

  "I think it looks good," Frances said. "Keep it on for a while, and then take it off if the date's going well."

  "Keep it on the whole time," Natalie said. "I'm starting to hear some things about him."

  All three of us stared at Natalie, who immediately shut her mouth and turned bright red.

  "What have you been hearing?" I asked.

  "From who?" Allie added.

  "From the guys on the cross-country team," Natalie said. "I was sort of asking around."

  "And?" I tapped my foot impatiently, trying to listen for howls of pain from downstairs. "What? Does he have three heads and carry frogs in his back pocket?"

  Natalie furrowed her forehead. "Why would he carry frogs?"

  "Natalie! What's wrong with him?"

  Allie cleared her throat. "Unless it's really important, I think we should let Blue just go out and have fun."

  "Um…okay." Natalie sat on the edge of the bed and tucked her hands under her thighs.

  I waited for a full minute for her to say something else, but she didn't. But I could hear my dad doing his injured-coyote imitation downstairs, and that was just too much to put Heath through. "I have to go."

  Natalie shrugged. "Take your phone."

  "Take my phone? Is he going to leave me on the side of the road or something?"

  She grimaced. "You just hear things."

  "Like what?"

  "Well... that he's... Um..."

  "What?" I sort of shouted it
, but I couldn't help it. I was going mad! "Just say it!"

  "He's apparently sort of a jerk."

  "A jerk?" Was she kidding? "That's it? I thought you were going to say he was a murderer or something."

  "Not yet."

  "Not yet? What does that mean?" I felt like my head was spinning off. I did not need this kind of stress while my dad was crawling around the living room on his hands and knees howling while my new boyfriend-to-be concluded that I was from a family of total lunatics.

  Allie stood up. "Blue, forget about it. Just go have fun."

  "Have fun? How am I supposed to have fun? Natalie here just implied that Heath is going to start knocking people off at any minute. I'm going to spend the night worrying that he's going to pull a gun out of his sock!"

  Natalie bounded to her feet. "Listen, Blue. I'm sorry. I haven't heard anything, really. Just some of the guys sort of rolled their eyes when I asked about him."

  "Rolled their eyes? That's it?" I heard a distinct howl float up the stairs. My dad doing his wolf mating call. Great.

  "Yeah. But these are good guys, so if they roll their eyes...well, that means something's up."

  "That's all they did? Roll their eyes? They didn't say anything else?" What kind of help was this? She was wigging me out, and wasn't telling me why! Suddenly, Colin's warnings popped back into my head, and suddenly I got nervous. Really nervous. "What do you know, Nat? Tell me!"

  "It's not a big deal." Natalie wouldn't look at me.

  "It's not? So you just tried to ruin my date for no reason?"

  "I was worried about you!"

  Frances walked between us. "Hey, you guys. Let it go. Blue, Natalie loves you and wants to make sure you're safe. That's all. And Natalie, stop freaking Blue out." She turned to me and put her hands on my shoulders. "Blue, you look totally hot. There's a gorgeous senior downstairs who has been listening to your dad make animal noises for the last five minutes. You need to pull yourself together and go convince him that you're adopted."

  I took a deep breath. If there was something really awful about Heath, Theo would have stopped me. He was my brother, after all. And Colin liked me well enough. He wouldn't have let me go on a date to get murdered. Maybe it was a guy thing. It was going to be okay, assuming I could get him away from my parents before they permanently destroyed any chance I had with him. "Adopted. Right. I can do that. I haven't made animal noises since I was six."