“We have noted your mood swings,” she starts and Gax groans softly to himself. “Whilst we are pleased to see you living and receiving every day as a good day, we do not recognise the song you are using. Therefore, your music channels today will be limited to suitable songs that will reflect your mood. However, we trust you will see that those songs will be more appropriate. A note has been made of the fact that you have knowledge of unlisted music.” After another hard stare through the screen she disappears. Gax lowers himself in his chair, stunned. He has to take a few deep breaths, for he can feel the panic growing.
Gax finishes his breakfast without tasting a single mouthful. The day that started so joyfully has left him feeling desperate and worried. To top it off, Yulra starts playing gaudy music, starting with a song about how every day is a good day when we channel our thoughts, curb our emotions and do our duty. Gax feels like shutting her up, then the text strikes him, feeling like a gentle rebuke. Yes, his duty is to complete the mission, to think about what is right, what is noble, what is pure and good. He frowns, wondering if there is maybe some truth in Caecilia’s explanation, that we shouldn’t be influenced by emotions. “Maybe I should be more guided by what I know to be right,” he mutters. Yulra promptly tells him she didn’t quite get that, but was there something about the song he wished to respond to or query?
“No thanks, Yulra, the song was fine,” he groans, almost adding that he’s going to read for a while. He swallows the words back down though, he really doesn’t want more questions about his reading tastes. He wonders if they monitor what books he would borrow from the Bibliotheca. Gax is pretty sure they will, but what if he just sits there and reads. Will they check on that? He wants to read some of these books, like the Nuptialem List and Your Future, or the one about Downstream choices. He goes upstairs as he really wants to read his own Book first, carefully getting it out of hiding, as somehow he doesn’t trust Yulra with noises. He doesn’t want her to record where he has hidden the Book, just in case. Gax isn’t sure what sort of ‘just in case’ but he decides not to risk his Book being found. He soon feels so much better, lying on his bed reading, drinking it in; letting the words uplift and encourage him.
Chapter 13
After lunch Gax decides to go into the city. He still hasn’t been to the Bibliotheca, and there are a few books he wants to read, preferably without any questions being asked. He hesitates, wondering if the guards are still checking everyone’s papers. Gax worries that the note made of him singing unlisted songs will show up on his papers. He looks at his notebook and pen, will he need them? There might be a lot to take in, but on the other hand, Gax doesn’t want to draw attention to himself by scribbling away. The fact that he has a notebook is something he would rather keep quiet about. So in the end Gax puts the notebook back in its hiding place and sets off.
It is hot at this time of the day. The baked dry air makes his nostrils hurt. He takes his time, stopping every now and then in the shade to catch his breath and take in the green of the countryside around the city, that is gradually turning yellow and brown. He dreads the coming summer, hoping he will be back in time for Christmas. Having to spend Christmas in this dreary place, without Carols, or anything reminding him of Christmas; Gax isn’t sure he wants to even think about that option. Of course, during training they discussed it, but Gax had been so sure of success, and determined to complete the mission quickly, the idea of still being here at Christmas time seemed only a very remote possibility. Now he isn’t so sure anymore.
The gates loom up more quickly than he expected. It is busier than usual but the queue moves quickly. The guards still look grumpy, but alert and Gax feels the back of his shirt stick to him. He tells himself it’s just the heat and his walk uphill, or excitement about going to the Bibliotheca. Nothing to do with the guards scanning all documents, taking fingerprints of some people. Gax feels the papers in his pocket, trying to look calm, to be calm, knowing that Linu will have done a great job. The queue shuffles forward and Gax watches the people in front of him enter the city. He breathes a sigh of relief when his papers are briefly looked at before he is waved through. He wonders how many of the double checked people will be Mansits, or whether that will have any bearing.
Gax’s aims to find a map at the Bibliotheca. He studied the map, of course, before coming out, but he would love to reorient himself. For one thing, he needs to find the shop where they sell laptops and tablets, maybe even mobile phones. He hasn’t seen anyone using a phone but there might be a ban on using it in public. He feels so isolated and desperate to contact his team. He regrets not taking a micro sd card in with him as that would be so much easier to hide than a proper notebook. He could type up his reports, then just hide the memory card. He walks quickly to the Bibliotheca, full of curiosity. Will it look run down like the bookshop?
The Bibliotheca is cool and quiet. Gax wrinkles his nose at the old fashioned looking computers. He walks to some shelves, keeping his eyes open, observing all around him. Some people are reading at a big desk, a young girl is sitting on the floor near a shelf, and the old woman at the help desk is doing her nails. She looks like Inritia and for a moment Gax wonders if the woman is her mum. Nobody seems to track what people do, although he sees a few people pushing trolleys with books around. They don’t look happy or in a hurry. Some have yellow skin and look tired and depressed. He finds himself staring at one of the young men, who seems to struggle pushing a half empty trolley. The wheel catches and the young man leans more heavily on it, unable to free its wheel. Gax quickly walks over, and straightens the trolley.
“Here you are,” he smiles, “just the wheel caught in the carpet.” The young man slowly looks up at him, his eyes vacant and exhausted. He nods, almost opens his mouth to say something, then drops his head again, pushing the trolley with shaking arms to the next aisle. Gax feels terrible for the young man. Is he ill? Then a very quiet voice hisses behind his back.
“He’s just back from beyond the hills. Don’t talk to him. It will cause trouble for you and him. He’s a Mansit.” Gax stops himself just in time from spinning round, merely nods, and whispers a thank you back. When he looks casually to see where the voice comes from he sees an old man walk away calmly. It is the old man he served in the shop! Gax’s heart races. The man went out of his way to warn him, clearly taking a risk himself. Surely that means some kind of connection has been established. Then he looks at the young man again and his jubilant mood promptly evaporates. He has been punished by being sent beyond the hills, now he’s back in the city, almost too ill to push an empty trolley.
The council obviously uses harsh punishments to keep people in order. How far does one need to go to get punished? Is there a warning system? He knows he has been noted, as well as noticed, but does that mean once they have noted you often enough you are sent beyond the hills instantly, or is there due process? Can you defend yourself? And who decides all this? What about this young man? He’s obviously returned from behind the hills, so is he now a valued member of society once more, or is he under probation? Gax feels the questions building up, leaving his head spinning. He catches himself staring and hastily walks to the nearest shelf, trying to look busy. In the end he manages to control himself once more. “Focus, Gax, it’s lack of focus that gets people into hot water,” he mumbles.
His excitement rises when he gets to the shelf called Happy Living, the same title as the bookshop’s shelves with books he needs. Soon he spots the book he is after most of all, The Nuptialem List and Your Future. He takes it off the shelf, trying to control his movements, as if he is just casually looking at random books, reading blurbs here and there, definitely not specifically looking for something in particular. He takes another book off the shelf, called Happy Living Every Day, and another rather large one, Good Days Come To Those Who Trust. Gax takes these to the table; the older lady that had been reading has now gone, leaving her books behind, covered in screwed up paper. How rude to leave such a mess Gax thinks.
Soon he is reading through the Nuptialem book. It reads easily, but is clumsy and patronising, probably aimed at older teenagers. Gax rolls his eyes at a few bits, then he gets to the interesting part, about the List itself. “Once you turn 21 you will register your name on the list. You will do a comprehensive test which will determine your score. This score can then be matched up with compatible scores. The List will allow you to peruse the scores of others of the opposite sex to find your perfect match. You will then apply for the match to be accepted. Once the match has been accepted and approved you will set a date for the formalising of your Attachment.”
Gax sits back in shock. That is how they marry, assuming that’s what the attachment refers to? That is what you do once you are his age, you register, find someone with a good score that fits yours, then that’s it? He is horrified and struggles to breathe. He has only just turned 21, but Caecilia already asked why he wasn’t on the list yet. Soon others will find out, no doubt. What about the council? Should he expect another lecture starting with, “We have noted…”? “I can’t,” he whispers frantically to himself, “I really can’t! Who knows how quickly it all goes through, then what do I do once the mission is completed? What about the poor girl? And anyway I don’t want to!” His voice trails off. Of course, that’s not an issue once you banish all feelings and emotions. It’s just a matter of matching numbers, you then get on with life and every day is a good day.
He leans back, staring in the distance. Will this cause problems? There is no way he will enter his name on the List, of course. But will his name be added anyway, just because he is the right age? He is quite sure that Linu has entered his correct age, but this has never come up in any of the team get-togethers. He looks through the book for a chapter with exceptions; there aren’t any. Gax can feel panic cramping his stomach. He can’t possibly be matched and married to somebody in Elabi. The sweet face of Caecilia with her red cheeks floats into his mind, but even that he pushes aside. No, she is a contact, a connection and yes, he likes her. That is as far as it can go, he decides. Anyway, she doesn’t even know what courtship is and is all set to enter her name onto the List. Gax sighs. What a mess this could turn into!
He is curious about the number score. How do you determine your number? He keeps leafing through the book until he reaches the end, where it explains that it’s important to sit the Test without preconceived notions to get the best and most accurate score and to ensure a perfect match. Frustrated, Gax is determined to find out all about the Test and how scores determine compatibility. Is it people with the same score? But then, opposites attract, so is it people with opposing scores? Is there a provisional meeting up, like a type of blind date to see how you get on in real life? Is that even a problem here, or is it just a matter of being suitable to each other on paper and the rest is all about logically accepting the way things are? Gax looks at the book with disdain. Now he has more questions than when he started.
Chapter 14
Gax returns the books to the shelf, which earns him some strange looks from other visitors to the Bibliotheca. He wanders into the next section, spotting a specially cordoned off part to the Bibliotheca further over. That part is obviously just for people with Amplissimos and Altiorem Status, so Gax focusses on another shelf, not wanting to draw attention to himself by looking at that special corner too much. This one has ‘Elabi’ on its shelves, and he hopes to find some maps, background information and maybe even some history. He lets his fingers trail along the shelves, following the spines of the books, his lips silently following the words. By the time he gets to the end of the shelf Gax feels like laughing. Every single book is about Elabi and what makes this city so amazing.
“No history though. Not a single book about the past, just one which describes how Elabi used to be before the establishment of the special city council. This book tells him how it’s the best model for a city, fortunate to have such a progressive council. Gax pulls a face. He doesn’t think spying on people in their own home is progressive, nor lecturing them when they sing songs that aren’t recognised. Gax now values the freedoms he had growing up in Mataiox and it is only the knowledge that soon he will be back in the free world that helps him to not despair. He looks at the rows of books, all telling people how amazing their lives are. Lives that are not free at all.
He is glad to find a map of the city and continues looking for maps of the general area to find Beyond the Hills, or Downstream. Nothing shows up though and in the end Gax gives up. He looks at the city map and finding the Bibliotheca is easy. He looks at the various shops, noting the lack of usual shops, like clothes shops and boutiques. There is one high end clothes shop and one standard. Gax looks around, noticing that the women all wear similar clothes. Very simple, he thinks, not flashy. Most of the dresses are plain and no one is wearing jeans. Gax had already heard that jeans were not an option and he would have to get used to cotton or linen trousers. He hates odd fitting clothes, but they suited the heat, even if doesn’t like the way they look. Seeing all the other men wear them helps, but it’s one of the things Gax misses from home. For the winter he has a few woollen trousers, just in case he is still here after Resurrection Sunday. Gax fervently hopes to be home by then, and not just because the woolly trousers are itchy.
He looks at the map again, glad to find a Mixed Store that might have laptops. Hopefully they have the smaller models, he muses, as he doesn’t like carrying a huge laptop round with him, especially if he wants to take it with him when he leaves Elabi. He sighs. Leaving and home are constantly in his thoughts at the moment. Jolting his head back he reappraises his situation. The mission is not too bad and he certainly has done harder, much riskier things during training. He isn’t sure why he is finding this mission such a struggle. He is lonely though, and thinks hopefully of the laptop or even a tablet. It’s easier to take pictures on a tablet. He weighs up the risk of sending pictures via email, not sure if that will raise a red flag. “I think just short, simple emails to start with,” he mutters and puts the map back, suddenly in a rush to have a look at what the shop has to offer.
The city roads are definitely busier than Gax has seen them before. The smell of fish is also more obvious. It’s still quiet though, not many people seem to talk, and those that do are keeping their voices down. Gax doesn’t see a single happy face, although they all light up when someone talks to them. Gax is starting to understand, as he himself is beginning to feel that way. He loves it when Caecilia chats to him, he felt so excited when the old man kindly warned him in the library. “I’m sure my face lights up too, when I see a friend or someone I know,” he thinks. He wonders where they’re all going, as people just seem to be milling about, walking through the city aimlessly. Gax finds the Mixed Store, and walks in. The shop looks as run down as the other ones Gax has seen. He looks at the tired board with the shop’s map and locates the computer department.
“Seriously,” he gasps when he sees the computer department, “these computers are ancient, from the year Dot.” He stands and looks round, his excitement fading quickly. “You’d be lucky to have one going in time to actually type an email before midnight, at their loading speed,” he groans. Slowly Gax walks over to the nearest two computers, staring at their huge, clunky beige keyboards, massive screens, a mouse on the side still attached with a thick wire… It’s like a computer museum, he thinks. An older man shuffles over, his shoulders drooping. He raises his chin respectfully and then just waits, not looking at Gax at all. Gax hesitates a moment, then asks, “Um..do you sell laptops as well, by any chance?” The man’s head comes up with a snap, he shrieks one short “Ha!” Then looks round furtively, cackling a laugh every few seconds.
“Follow me,” the man says and he starts walking to a computer corner out of the way. He sends a quick glance over his shoulder and out loud says, “This one is one of the better ones, to be honest.” He pats the machine, then he bends down to show Gax the actual computer underneath. Gax leans over as well and sudde
nly the man whispers, “No laptops, no modern stuff.” Out loud he says, “Look, disc drive there, see?” Then softly he adds, “Only old computers now, black and brown screens, nothing portable. Not for a very long time.” He points at the enormous monitor, “Usual screen resolution, better memory though. Memory inside is actually 8GB, so pretty good. Hardly need a storage disk.” Gax stares, black and brown screens? Do they actually still exist? He snorts, some of his team mates wouldn’t be happy at all. That would be the end of their video games.
“Um…what about internet?” He asks the man, keeping his voice a bit low, just in case. The man stares at him blankly for a second, then cackles again.
“Intranet you mean? Yes, it has intranet alright, with all the intranet connections and some,” he says, giving Gax a funny stare. Gax nods very slowly. Of course, intranet, limited to Elabi. You can connect within Elabi, but not outside of it. And of course it will be monitored. If songs in your own home are monitored, then of course letters across the city will be checked as well. He asks the man for prices and after the man has shown him a few models that look basically the same, he explains that he is hoping to be back next week, ready to buy one. The man dips his head in acknowledgement and says, “I won’t be working next week, my colleague will help you. He is younger, but he knows a lot about these sort of computers.” Again the funny stare, a bit longer this time, checking to see if Gax gets his meaning. Gax does.
Walled City (The Elabi Chronicles Book 1) Page 8