The Price of Love

by Cassy Roop

When we reached the dance floor, I reached for Kendall and started to sway to the pulsing bass coming from the speakers. I grabbed her by the hips and pulled her body close to mine. Her gaze never left mine as we melded together.

  God she feels good.

  Kendall wrapped her arms around my neck pressing her breasts into my chest. I could feel every soft curve of her body through the thin fabric of her dress as we rubbed up against each other. I had imagined the moment when I would be able to place my hands on her body for as long as I could remember. My imagination could not even begin to replicate what it actually felt like to hold her.

  Kendall turned around in my arms and started to rub her ass against my groin. She entwined her arms above her head and around my neck. I leaned in to place my face where the curve of her neck met her shoulder. I inhaled and caught a warm vanilla aroma and some other scent that could only be unique to Kendall. I knew she had to feel my erection pressing into her backside.

  I had the urge to rip her dress right from her body and bury myself deep inside her. Nothing could possibly feel as good having me pressed between her slick, wet folds. I felt my arms reach around her body as I splayed my palms against her flat stomach. Just a few inches lower and I would reach a spot that even heaven could not compare to.

  I jerked back instantly and separated myself from her body. I had to get myself under control before I lost it and made a huge mistake. I will only end up hurting her in the end. I care too deeply for Kendall to allow anyone or anything come between her and her happiness. I included.

  I looked down into confused eyes that were asking me what was wrong. She reached her hand out toward me and I stepped back.

  “Don’t!” I barked.

  I saw her flinch at my words. I did not mean to scare her. Hell, it ripped me in two to do it. I know she did not understand what was happening with me. I had to get back control.

  I have to get out of here. I have to save her from me.

  “I have to go,” I said before I turned on my heel and walked out of the club.

  When I got outside, I sent a quick text to Jackson for him to watch out for Kendall and see her safely back to her room. There was no way I would be able to stop myself from taking her if I did.

  Chapter 9

  Kendall

  Being out on the dance floor with Tristan had felt so freeing. I could feel myself starting to let go of some of my control. Having his hard body pressed against me ignited a spark within my body I had never felt before. Sex with Brett was always just that. I had never gotten any pleasure out of it. Brett was all about himself and how fast he could get off. The only orgasms I have ever had, I had given to myself.

  Dancing with Tristan was so sexy and sensual, I felt like I could have an orgasm just from the motion of him rubbing against me alone. In the ten years since Brett raped me and eight since he killed my parents, I have never had any desire to be with a man. The feelings Tristan brought out in me were foreign. For once I felt sexy and desired. I wanted Tristan more than I had ever wanted any man. I knew he wanted to me too. I could feel his erection pressed into me as he grinded against me. His hands placed on my belly had me wishing he would slide them lower to reach that spot at my core that ached for him.

  When he distanced himself from me so abruptly, I was confused. He looked pained, like someone had delivered a harsh blow to his body. It physically hurt me to see that pain in his eyes. I reached out for him to offer comfort for whatever it was he was feeling.

  “Don’t!”

  I flinched. He said that one word with such anger that it frightened me. I was instantly reminded of Brett and his anger whenever he was upset with me. I brought my hand back to my side and just stared at him as he fought with whatever demons he was battling.

  “I have to go,” was all he said before he turned away from me and walked out of the club.

  Jackson and Cassie approached me on the same spot I still stood at alone on the dance floor. Jackson said that Tristan had asked him to escort Cassie and me back to our room at Luxe. We grabbed our coats from the VIP room and left the club just shortly after.

  We were all silent as we made our way back to the hotel. Cassie and Jackson did not ask me what was wrong, but I knew they could tell I was troubled by Tristan’s abrupt exit. When we approached our room, I went inside to change and left Cassie and Jackson out in the hall to say good night.

  I peeled off my dress and hung it back in the garment bag. I decided I needed a shower to wash off the sweat and grime from the club. Most of all, I wanted to wash off the scent of Tristan. I was so angry and confused by his actions. His little hot and cold game he kept playing with me was starting to get old. I could feel his want for me out on that dance floor. So what was his problem?

  After showering I dressed in my yoga pants and t-shirt and climbed into the bed. I sat with my back resting against the headboard trying to go over what happened in my mind. That was where Cassie found me a few minutes later.

  “Hey Ken-Doll. Feel like talking?” she asked.

  I really was in no mood to talk, but knowing Cassie she would not let me give up that easily.

  “Sure,” I mumbled.

  “What happened? One minute you guys were all hot and heavy on the dance floor and the next he was gone. I swear Kendall you two were about two seconds away from getting it on out on that dance floor,” she said with a wink trying to get me to feel better.

  “I know, Cass. That is the confusing part. I do not know what happened. I was enjoying myself. He was enjoying himself. I could…feel it,” I said shyly. “Then he all of a sudden pushed me away and took off.”

  Cassie sat next to me on the bed trying to ponder her next words.

  “I talked to Jackson about Tristan. He said to just give him time, Kendall. Apparently Tristan is just as scared as you are to let go of that control you hold on to. Jackson said he will come around.”

  “I don’t think I want to give him the time anymore, Cass. I finally started to allow myself to feel things for a man again after Brett and he cannot decide whether he wants me or not? One minute he is all hot for me then the next he is cold. I do not like this roller coaster of emotions it brings,” I replied.

  “Just promise me you won’t close yourself off to the possibility of being with someone whether it is Tristan or someone else.”

  “Ok,” I said.

  Cassie hugged me good night and went to her room to crash. I lay back on my bed for what seemed like forever trying to think what could have possibly had made Tristan react the way he did. I came to the conclusion that I was not going to lay around and wait for him to get his act together. I have spent eight years trying to put my life back together. Tristan was the first man who had come along and helped break down some of the walls I hold around my heart. Maybe it was time for me to start living again. With or without Tristan.

  The next two weeks at the hotel were spent with Cassie preparing our review for the magazine. The morning after the club accident with Tristan, he sent me a text saying he had to go out of town for business and that if Cassie or I needed anything we should contact Jackson. Every day after that he would send me a text asking how I was doing or how the review was going. I would always answer with “ok” and “fine”.

  It was now Friday, and also our last night to stay at the hotel. Tomorrow night was the grand opening ball. Tristan had said at the beginning of me agreeing to the project that he would be my date for the ball. I have not heard anything from him since Wednesday. No doubt Jackson was reporting back to him because he stopped by to see us nearly every day. I think he also had a huge crush on Cassie and just wanted to see her.

  After Cassie and I finished putting the finishing touches on the piece to be sent to the magazine to be ready for publishing, we sat in the living room of our suite drinking wine.

  “I’m bored,” Cassie stated. “Let’s go do something.”

  “What do you want to do?’ I asked.

  “How about we go back over Club Dime
nsion?”

  “You know what Cass, I’m game.” I said enthusiastically. I had been frustrated with Tristan’s mood that I was ready to just forget about him and let my hair down and have fun.

  Cassie and I got ready to go to the club by dressing in sexy club attire. I wore a short gold sequined dress that had an open back. Cassie chose a tight black mini skirt and a red halter top. We paired off our outfits with stilettoes and were on our way.

  Club Dimension was even more packed tonight than it was the night we came almost two weeks ago. Since we did not have Tristan or Jackson with us, we did not go to the VIP room like last time. Instead, we threw ourselves in with the crowd out on the main floor. After grabbing a few drinks from the bartender, we were lucky enough to find an empty table. We sat for a few minutes and talked just like we used to while we enjoyed our drinks.

  “I wanna dance!” Cassie shouted to me above the music.

  “I’m in!” I shouted back, “But first I want some shots!”

  We weaved our way through sweaty bodies to reach the bar again. Cassie got the attention of the bartender easily. Cassie had always been an attention grabber. She was gorgeous. After a few moments the bartender brought over four shots of tequila.

  As we held up our shot glasses, Cassie and I said our famous toast from our days in college before we took a shot.

  “Here’s to you, here’s to me, friends forever we’ll always be, but if we ever disagree fuck you, and here’s to me!”

  We tossed back two shots each. I welcomed the burning sensation as it slid down my throat and the warmness it created in my belly. Now I was ready to get my dance on.

  I could feel the effects of the tequila as we made our way over to the dance floor. There were bodies everywhere. There was a thick, musky scent of sweat as the crowd of people pulsed to the heavy bass of the music. I just wanted to let go and feel free. Have no worries about tomorrow, because there was only here and now. I forgot about Brett, the devastation of losing my parents, and even Tristan as I swayed my body to the beat.

  I grabbed Cassie and started dancing behind her. I knew it was probably every man’s wet dream to see two hot chick grinding against each other out on the dance floor, but I didn’t care. I was here with my best friend. I had no inhibitions, no walls. Just soul defining, relaxing freedom.

  After several songs Cassie said she needed a drink and made her way over to the bar to get us some. I stayed on the dance floor and didn’t care if people were watching me dance all by myself. No one could pull me out of this happy bubble I was in right now. That was until I felt a pair of hands grab my hips. I spun around and stared at an insanely handsome man.

  “Wanna dance?” he asked.

  I smiled and shrugged. Why the hell not. Tonight marked a new night for me. The old Kendall would have turned away an invitation to dance with a man. This new Kendall was going to relish in it.

  “Sure,” I said as I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled me close. His dark brown hair was messy and a little damp from dancing. His crystal blue eyes were slightly glazed over no doubt due to the effects of alcohol. I was sure mine looked the same. The tight grey t-shirt and dark jeans he wore gave him a bad boy look.

  “I’m Matt,” he said as he leaned in a little so I could hear him.

  “Kendall,” I replied.

  “Well Kendall, I must admit I have been watching you all night and could not resist asking you to dance.”

  “Well, I am glad you did.”

  As a slow sexy song started to play, Matt gripped me closer to him. He slid his thigh between my legs to the point of making our hips touch. I could smell his cologne mixed with sweat and had to admit, I was starting to get turned on.

  As we were dancing to the sexy voice of Rihanna, I suddenly felt Matt’s body ripped from mine. I opened my eyes to find Tristan staring at me with so much intensity, I thought my body would light up in flames.

  “What the hell do you think you are doing man?” Matt growled at Tristan.

  “She’s with me,” Tristan spat.

  I could not believe the way he was acting. It was like he was taking possession over me. His mood swings were really starting to piss me off. What was he doing here anyway? I thought he was out of town?

  “What is wrong with you, Tristan?” I hissed, “We were just dancing!?

  “Is this your boyfriend, Kendall?” Matt asked.

  I looked at Tristan whose chest was heaving in and out at a rapid pace. Why is he so angry?

  I’ll show him.

  “No, he isn’t and he was just leaving,” I told Matt as I reached for him so we could continue dancing. I was not going to let my good night be ruined by Tristan and his little temper tantrum.

  Tristan grabbed my upper arm before I could return into Matt’s arms. “Come on we are leaving,” he said through gritted teeth.

  “Whatever man, I’m not up for dealing with you and your girl’s drama. Thanks for the dance Kendall,” Matt said before walking away.

  “Come on,” Tristan barked as he lead me by the arm to the exit of the club.

  “Wait Tristan! Let me go! I’m here with Cassie. I can’t just leave her here!”

  “Jackson has her, don’t worry.”

  He continued to drag me through the club. Tristan seemed so determined to get me out of there, that I had trouble keeping up with him.

  When we got outside, he finally let go of my arm. He stood on the sidewalk with his hands on his hips and his head hung down toward his chest. Not a word was said for what seemed like ages. So finally I spoke up to get some answers.

  “What the fuck was that Tristan? Why the hell are you storming up into the club and man handling me like I did something wrong? How did you even know we were here?”

  I mouthed out question after question. I could not control my anger over the situation and Tristan’s behavior. Finally after a minute or two he answered me.

  “Jackson. Jackson told me where you were.”

  “You were having us spied on?”

  “No, I was having Jackson watch out for you, that is all.”

  “By having us followed? What the fuck, Tristan!”

  He took a deep inhale as if trying to calm his nerves. We weren’t going to get anywhere by yelling at each other on the sidewalk. The last thing I needed was to be in tomorrow’s gossip magazine about being in a fight with Tristan if some paparazzi should happen to see us.

  “Look, let me take you back to the hotel and we will talk. Ok?”

  “Fine, whatever.” I said.

  We didn’t say a word to each other the entire walk back to the hotel or in the elevator ride up to the penthouse. I appreciated the silence. The few minutes was much needed in order for me to be able to calm down. This man was so infuriating!

  When we finally made it back to the penthouse, Tristan produced a key card and unlocked my door. At first I was about to ask him how he got a key to my room, but he probably had a master key to all the rooms because he did own the damn hotel.

  Tristan held the door open for me and allowed me to enter first. He followed soon after closing the door, but not before putting the “do not disturb” sign on the door handle. He then walked straight past me and over to the bar where he poured himself two fingers of an amber liquid and gulped it down.

  After repeating the action one more time, Tristan walked over to the couch and sat down. I remained standing. I felt like it gave me an advantage over him. I wanted to still feel like I was in control, even though I was breaking inside.

  Tristan let his breath out in a rush before he opened his mouth to speak. What he said caught me slightly off guard.

  “I didn’t like it.”

  I stared at him for a few moments trying to understand the meaning behind his four word statement.

  “You didn’t like what, Tristan?” I sneered.

  “I didn’t like his hands on you.”

  Woah.

  Tristan’s confession gave me a sudden surge of happiness. He wa
s jealous. Well he cannot have it both ways.

  “Tristan, you are so confusing! I don’t know which way is up or down with you anymore! You can’t have it both ways. You can’t push me away, but yet not want anyone else to be with me either,” I asserted.

  Tristan set his glass down on the table next to the couch and walked over to where I was standing. He brushed a stray strand of hair behind my ear. I closed my eyes with his touch. It was so completely unfair how one simple touch from this man could make me lose all my inhibitions. When it comes to Tristan Price, I was a weak, desperate woman. I crave this man like I crave my next breath.

  “Kendall,” he whispered, “I am not good for you. All I could ever do is bring you heartache. I would soon rather tear off one of my limbs before I allow that to happen.”

  He stared into my eyes. His green eyes looking into my blue with a heat that felt like my body was on fire.

  Please touch me again.

  “Why don’t you let me decide that for myself?” I asked.

  “Dammit Kendall!” he shouted causing me to jump. He stepped back away from me and paced the living room.

  “What the hell is the problem, Tristan? One minute you’re hot, the next you are cold. I hate feeling like this. Do you not want me? Is that it? I am a big girl Tristan. I can take rejection. I’d rather you just tell me and get it over with.” I sighed.

  He abruptly turned around and thundered his way back over to me. He grabbed me by my upper arms and bent down so that he was looking directly into my eyes. My arms seared where his hands touched me. I know he felt this. This insane attraction between us.

  “I want you more than anyone or anything in my entire life. I have dreamed about touching you…tasting you. I want nothing more than to bury myself deep inside you. I want to claim you Kendall. I want to own you, body and soul,” he confessed.

  My mouth fell open. So he did feel it. What I don’t understand was why he was denying himself, why he was denying me.

  He reached up with slightly trembling hands and ran his thumbs across my bottom lip. My tongue darted out to wet them on instinct. Tristan sucked in a breath and quickly shut his eyes. When he opened them, his green eyes had a hint of fire around his pupils. I have never seen his eyes blaze like this before. It looked like his eyes were on fire.