Raw: Book 1

by Michelle Maris

  She didn’t expect to see him here in the driveway. He had his running sneakers on and a pair of basketball shorts. His t-shirt was off, and he had flung it over his shoulder, and as he walked closer, Madison could see the sweat running down his stomach.

  “Good Morning, Madison.”

  “Hello, Jeremy. I see you took your run outside this morning.”

  Jeremy approached her, leaned in and kissed her before Madison could intercept his advances. “Jeremy, you shouldn’t do that out here where someone might see you.”

  “Are we going to act like nothing is going on between us?” Jeremy asked calmly.

  “Nothing is going on, so whatever you’re thinking, you need to forget about it.”

  Jeremy cocked his head, and his eyebrow shot up. “Nothing is going on here?” Jeremy pointed at the space between them.

  “Nothing and I liked your friend, Alan. I now can say two men have made me orgasm.”

  Jeremy clenched his jaw and swallowed the bile that came up. “You slept with him?”

  “I’m pretty sure that’s what I meant.” Madison tucked her clutch under her arm and walked away.

  “It’s funny I was just thinking that everything I knew about you was all an assumption based on the time we spent together and now I know the saying is right.” He called out to her.

  “What saying?” Madison stopped and turned to face him.

  “When you assume you make an ass out of you and me. Well, I assumed you had integrity so now you’re an ass for sleeping with a married man and I’m an ass for thinking that behavior was beneath you.”

  Jeremy pivoted and walked towards the back of the mansion while Madison stood in the driveway feeling like Jeremy jabbed her heart with a knife and wondering why the hell she lied to Jeremy about sleeping with his married friend.

  Madison knew she was messed up, but this behavior was beneath her. Why couldn’t she open up and tell Jeremy the truth? Explain to him why she keeps pushing him away, instead, of hurting his feelings. He was a nice guy, a gentleman, and she liked him, and he deserved better than the way she treated him.

  ~~~~~

  The Party of the year was in full swing when Madison slipped in through the French doors off to the back of the massive space. This was a part of the mansion used for the larger parties held throughout the year. The space looked beautiful lit with soft white, pink, and lavender lights. Bevy hired the best party planner, and she always went over the top for the Gala.

  Madison chose a flowing, sleeveless slate blue dress. It showcased the thin lines of her shoulders, her ample cleavage and it was cut low in the back exposing her soft skin. She stalked around the outside of the room observing all the wealthy men and women laughing and talking while waiters walked around with champagne and caviar on blinis. A waiter with a tray walked passed her and offered her a cocktail. Madison lifted the glass and continued scanning the room.

  She found an empty corner where she could look out at the crowds while going unnoticed. Madison hated these parties. It brought out her social anxiety in the most severe way. Bevy never understood how she could present herself before a judge but then experience such social anxiety in every other aspect of her life.

  Madison kept her life private because of the anxiety she felt when she had to be herself. She couldn’t help that her career threw her into the public eye but during those times she felt like she was playing a role. She was Madison the lawyer fighting for her client. It wasn’t her life in the spotlight. She represented someone else’s life, and that was easy for her.

  Exposing her life around her peers brought on anxiety that at times made it hard for her to breathe. Her heart raced, and she often felt like she could vomit. When it was severe, she’d black out.

  Every year played out the same for Madison. She made sure to arrive late to the party and leave early, and most times she got away with talking to very few people while she showed face. Bill, Bevy’s boyfriend, was always a great buffer so she’d often latch onto him and Bill understood, so he patiently stayed with her.

  Jeremy felt Madison’s presence the moment she entered the space. He towered over the women that swarmed around him and zoned in on her. He watched as she snuck in and slinked along the back wall then he pinned his gaze on her when she holed herself up in the corner.

  “Oh shit, look who’s here,” said Carol, a fifty something-year-old divorcee interested in joining RAW. “I can’t believe that bitch had the nerve to show up here.”

  Carol hung all over Jeremy the second she laid her greedy little eyes on him. Bevy pulled Jeremy aside and begged him to give Carol extra attention because Carol showed a keen interest in joining, and because she had much influence and many friends she’d be a great addition to RAW.

  Jeremy looked down as he followed Carol’s daggers. They pointed straight at Madison. Jeremy played dumb. “Whom are you referring to?” He asked.

  “Madison Avery, the bitch that fucks up men’s heads so badly she makes them turn on their wives.”

  “Excuse me.” Jeremy felt his jaw tick.

  “Madison Avery, the divorce attorney. All her clients are men. She convinces them that their ex-wives deserve nothing and goes to court and battles for them. She’s a bitch! I’d love to fuck with her.”

  Jeremy glanced over at Bevy who studied their interaction. “Can you excuse me for one moment, Carol, my boss flagged me down.” Jeremy lied, but he had to tell Bevy what Carol said about Madison. He couldn’t imagine Bevy wanting a member who sought revenge on Madison and one who had a mouth grimier than a sewer.

  Jeremy shook his head as he approached Bevy.

  “What’s wrong? Is she having a good time?”

  “She’s disgusting, and furthermore, she despises Madison. She wants revenge. Something about Madison and her ex-husband and the divorce proceedings.”

  “Oh, there’s always one sour grape. Okay, don’t waste your time on Carol but maybe when Madison shows up, you should warn her.”

  “Madison is here.” He turned and pointed to the back corner.

  “Oh dear, look at her. She’s a stunning beauty who’d love to blend into the wall.” Bevy clicked her tongue. “Jeremy, go help her.”

  “What do you mean help her?” Jeremy asked confused by the inference Bevy made.

  Bevy glanced over at Bill, “Usually Bill hangs out with her but he’s busy talking to the mayor.” Bevy waved Jeremy off. “Go over and keep her company.”

  “Bevy, answer my question. Why is Madison standing alone in the corner looking like she is trying to hide?”

  “Jeremy, Madison suffers from social anxiety in certain situations, actually most situations. Like tonight’s affair is probably an eight for her on a scale where ten is the worst of course.”

  Jeremy swung around to look at Madison. Her eyes met his, and he immediately strode towards her. As he got closer, a nervous smile stretched across her face, and when he got right up in front of her, he saw tears pooling in her eyes.

  “Sweetheart, are you okay?” Jeremy rubbed both her arms as he slightly bent at the knees, so he was eye level with her.

  “I’m hanging in there.” Her voice quivered.

  “You’re a terrible liar. You’re having an internal panic attack aren’t you?”

  “Sort of.” Madison tried to take in a deep breath. “Bevy told you.”

  “Yes, but only because she asked me to keep you company.” Jeremy stood next to Madison, put his arm around her and tucked her into his body. “Better?”

  “Getting there but unfortunately I won’t feel better until I’m back in my room for a couple of hours,” Madison said, sighing.

  “You don’t have to stay. I’ll walk you back to your room.”

  “As much as I’d love to run out of here, I need to stay a little longer.”

  “Why?” Jeremy didn’t understand all of Madison’s rules for herself.

  “Leaving will bring more attention to me tomorrow and days following the event.”

&nbs
p; “Ah, I see, and more attention means more explaining and more explaining means having to be out in front of people representing yourself, and that means panic attack.

  “Sounds about right,” Madison shuddered.

  “So what now?” Jeremy squeezed her in closer to him.

  “Now, I wait for Bill to finish talking to the mayor so he can take over babysitting me and you can go back to your admirers.” Madison looked up at Jeremy.

  “What if I don’t want to leave you?”

  “Jeremy, this is your job, and even though it’s a party, you are still working tonight. I know the members are going to want you to join them later.”

  “Does that bother you?” Jeremy looked out into the crowd and noticed Carol watching him with Madison.

  “No, you’re doing your job.”

  “Are you just part of my job?”

  Madison had hesitated before she answered him, “Yes, I’m just like every other member and don’t forget it.” Madison wiggled out of his hold on her. “What do think is going to happen? Do you think all this will end and I’ll marry you and have children with you? My life is not going to change. I’m not going to change. I don’t want a man in my life. Damn you, Jeremy Turner, you thought I’d fall in love with you.” Madison felt it hard to take a breath.

  “Didn’t you fall in love with me?”

  Madison’s jaw dropped open, “Don’t you get it. Nothing about my life is normal. I’m not normal. I don’t know how to be normal. You and I will never happen, so put it out of your mind.”

  “I don’t need normal. Who says what’s normal?” He asked.

  “Jeremy, you don’t need this. You’re gregarious, everyone loves you, and I’m fucked up. I’m never going to want to be with you, so please stop this.”

  “Consider it done.” Jeremy shoved his hands in his pockets and walked away.

  Madison backed herself into the corner. She gazed out into the crowds of people as a tear fell from her eye followed by more until she couldn’t stop them. She couldn’t stay here. She couldn’t breath and she thought she would pass out. It was time to leave.

  Jeremy joined a group of guys surrounded by ladies, yet he continued to watch Madison. His chest tightened as he watched Madison sweep tears from her face and then leave the Gala. He thought about her sitting alone in her room, and his heart ached. He would never put her out of his mind.

  Chapter 10

  Greg and Luke stood in the hallway, “You ready man?” Luke asked.

  “Are you sure this isn’t a mistake?” Jeremy asked as he waved his schedule in the air. “Maybe, you guys should go first and ask.

  “Dude, no way. If it’s a mistake, she’ll kick you out, again.” Luke and Greg both laughed as Greg grabbed his shoulders and dragged him into the hallway.

  “I’m not feeling well. Maybe I should tell Bevy.” The last time Jeremy saw Madison was at the Gala. Weeks past since then and this was not how he wanted to see her now.

  “Bullshit! You’re just gun shy after she treated you like her bitch.” Luke said as he strutted down the hall taking the lead.

  Jeremy decided not to respond. There was so much more going on here, and now he had to watch Greg and Luke fuck Madison because there was no way he could participate. Anger festered inside him as he thought of her choice tonight. After everything they’d been through, Madison decided this sick and twisted tactic was the way to move forward.

  As they approached Madison’s sex room, Jeremy felt a burning sensation in his chest. His heartbeat raced and he couldn’t take in a deep breath.

  Luke noticed, “Are you okay, dude. You don’t look right.”

  “I told you I’m not feeling well.” Jeremy rubbed his forehead with his index finger and thumb attempting to squeeze out the shooting pain he felt in his head.

  “Get through this and then go and sleep it off.” Greg patted his back. “We’ll pick up the slack. Right, Luke?”

  “Gladly.” Luke grabbed at his crotch, and his lewd behavior made Jeremy clench down on his jaw.

  “Show some respect.” Jeremy grabbed Luke’s shoulder and pulled him back.

  “Fuck, that hurts. I respect Madison. Who doesn’t? She’s a fucking hot piece of ass.” Luke backpedaled.

  Jeremy controlled his desire to beat the shit out of Luke because the anger brewing in him would probably lead to him putting Luke in the hospital. He released his grip and followed behind the two men as they walked into Madison’s bedroom.

  Madison came walking out of the bathroom dressed in a short white silk robe. Jeremy gazed at her, but she wouldn’t look at him. She crawled on her bed and sat on her knees. “Hello boys how are you tonight?”

  Luke and Greg answered while Jeremy stood frozen. His muscles tightened up on him as he clenched his fists.

  “Jeremy, you didn’t answer me.”

  Luke chimed in before Jeremy couldn’t answer her. “He’s okay, just a little tired.”

  “Really? Well then Jeremy, you can sit right there and watch.” Madison pointed to the chair next to the bed.

  The thought sickened him, but he was exhausted from the roller coaster ride he was on with her. Jeremy walked over to the chair and sat down.

  “Take off your clothes. I want you naked, and I want you to jerk off while the boys take care of me.”

  Madison was determined to make Jeremy hate her. It pained her to do this, but she had to. He was a young guy with his whole life in front of him, and he deserved more than what Madison could offer him.

  Jeremy inhaled a coarse breath then stood and removed his clothes. He sat back down as Madison eyed his body from head to toe. She then turned to Greg and Luke. “Let’s play.” She said as they undressed.

  Jeremy watched as Luke slipped Madison’s robe off her body and tossed it on the floor in front of Jeremy. They positioned themselves on either side of Madison as Luke took her tit into their mouths. He sucked and moaned as he nibbled her taut nipples. Greg slid his hand over her stomach and down between her legs.

  Madison let her thighs open as he fingered her. Luke nuzzled into her neck as he covered her skin with wet sloppy kisses. Greg pushed himself off the bed and settled his head between Madison’s thighs.

  The move gave Jeremy and Madison a clear view of each other. Madison turned her head, and their eyes met. “You’re not touching yourself.” She whispered. Luke and Greg stopped what they were doing an eyed Jeremy.

  Jeremy clenched his jaw and stood from the chair. He walked over to her, leaned down, and whispered in her ear. “I can’t do this.” He kissed her forehead and gently rubbed the top of her head as he stared at her with those loving eyes, “And I wish you couldn’t either.”

  Madison jerked up and watched as Jeremy gathered his clothes and left her room. The two men were shocked as they looked at each other.

  “He wasn’t feeling well. He was going to tell Bevy before we left but we forced him to come.” Greg explained. “Don’t be mad at him.”

  “I’m not mad, but we should call it a night. You should go check on your friend.”

  “No, were here we can still have fun.” Luke insisted.

  “No man, let’s go.” Greg shoved Luke prompting him to get up on his feet.

  The guys dressed and left her. Madison wrapped herself in her robe and ran out of the room back to her bedroom. She crawled up in a ball in her bed, hid under the blankets and cried herself to sleep.

  The next morning, Jeremy called Bevy to tell her she should cancel his appointments for the rest of the weekend because he was sick. Bevy loved her boys and felt real concern for all of them, so it was not unusual when Jeremy heard a knock on his door. “Come in.” He called out.

  Bevy opened the door and peeked in, “May I?” She had asked before she stepped into his room.

  “Of course, Bevy, you don’t have to ask.”

  “I do because though I own RAW, this is your private space.”

  Jeremy smiled. He appreciated her for respecting his space.

&
nbsp; Bevy approached his bed and pointed to the edge of his mattress. Jeremy nodded and shifted over to make more room for her. Bevy sat and rested her palm on his forehead. “You’re a little warm. Is there anything I can get you?”

  “I put a call into Mason. He’s bringing me lunch in about an hour.”

  “Good. Anything you need you just ask.” Bevy looked down at his bare chest. Are you naked under there?”

  “Bill would kill me if he heard you ask that.”

  “I can’t help it, Jeremy, you’re scrumptious. And anyway, I’d never act on it. I just like to dream.”

  “So do you want the truth or a lie?” Jeremy cocked his eyebrow at her.

  “Surprise me.”

  “I’m completely naked under here, and my dick got hard looking at you.”

  A smile stretched across Bevy’s face, “You made an old woman very happy, Jeremy, and you are a brilliant liar. Now, I want you to take care of yourself and let me know if you need anything.” Bevy stood up, leaned down and kissed the top of Jeremy’s head.

  She sashayed towards his bedroom door, “Jeremy, you know you can talk to me about anything.”

  “I know Bevy. Thank you." Jeremy had hesitated before he continued. "Bevy, I don't like Luke."

  "Why?"

  "I get a bad vibe from him."

  "I can't dismiss him based on your bad vibe."

  "But you can watch him closely and please tell Madison not to book him."

  "She is an adult. I can't dictate that to her."

  "Tell her I said so."

  "And she'll listen to you... Why?"

  "Tell her, please."

  "Okay." She smiled one last time, “You really are scrumptious.” She shivered then left his room.

  Jeremy laughed as Bevy shut the door behind her.

  Twenty minutes later there was another knock at the door. “Come in.” Jeremy placed his book down next to him.

  This time it was Mason carrying two bags. The smell of food permeated the space. “Burgers and fries, man.”

  “Are you going to stay and eat with me?” Jeremy jumped out of bed and adjusted his basketball shorts.